Chapter Text
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It was there that I sat and wrote, a warm summer night with nothing but my fellow stars cheering me on from the midnight sky and glide of my pen on stained sheets of paper. Whether it was coffee or tea, I can't remember. It might have been apple juice, for all I know. One of two things I can clearly remember from then was the warp of the page shifting beneath my hand as I wrote the empty words that had been weighing my heart. I also distinctly recall missing him... not the way he looked or the way he felt, but him. His presence.
The worst part of all was that feeling of not knowing. Not knowing whether tomorrow I would see him smile at me again, or if he would smile at someone else instead. I wasn't sure if he would ever smile at me again at all, after everything.
I don't deserve it.
These four words rang truer to my heart than the hollow ones I inked on those disfigured pages. Yet I spilled them anyway, those false hopes meant to ease an aching chest with the power of miracles and rainbows. Even if this was how I saw it, some part of me knew they had to still be written. Something in me, whether it be my heart or my soul, knew there was still the possibility they could come true. And to the slimmest of hopes I held on. A dying star clinging to the last of its light.
"Dear diary,
How will my story end?
Will it be a curtain call?
Holding hands with the friends I've clung to so dearly these past years, waiting for the stage lights to be blotted from my eyes so I can see clear again...
Or maybe I'll be backstage.
Just you and I, behind the curtains that our friends dance and sing so freely beyond.
...there, I can look into your eyes for once without you turning away.
Maybe you'll have the answer I want to hear, just waiting at the tip of your tongue.
However it may, I know it'll end burning brightly in our hearts.
How a star should end, in a blazing glory...
Unforgettable, for better or for worse."
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