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A shift considered normal for Station 118’s A Shift brings too much catastrophe and hijinks for anyone to handle, but this group isn’t just anyone. This group's personal lives are just about on par with what they have to handle at work on the regular. Some examples are Captain Bobby Nash’s past as a champion figure skater, Paramedic Hen Wilson having a long standing battle with a Council Woman gunning for mayor, Paramedic Howard “Chimney” Han who has a feud with a crow, Firefighter Ravi Panikkar who has somehow built up generational wealth to last 8 decades by his mid 20s.
Then there’s Firefighters Evan “Buck” Buckley and Eddie Diaz.
While their regular personal life weirdness is on par with the rest of their coworkers - messed up parents, escaping death more than most firefighters in more gruesome ways, having secret dead siblings, dead ex wife doppelgänger, tsunamis - there is one thing that sets these two apart from the rest of their group. The way they just are about each other. How they have been about each other since the start.
All this to say that no one really bats an eye when they’re too touchy or looky or talking in code or finishing each other's sentences or co-parenting a child or anything they do. Until, inevitably, one of them does.
The shift they were having was not of the norm for them. It's been… uneventful so to speak. Any time a shift like this comes along, everyone lays low as to not temp fate. One of their traditions to appease the Gods of fire - and to make sure no one gets bored enough to say the dreaded word - is that one of them will go pick up some pastries and coffee for the team. “A sweet treat for this sweet team!” as Buck and Ravi said it.
Today, it's Buck’s turn to be man behind, which means it's his turn for the sweet treat run.
And you can blame the domesticity of living together, working together, having made every one man job a two person task, and being in each other's back pockets for what happens next. But the real blame is on stupidity and clouded vision and repression and denial and and and…
And you can blame the reaction of everyone on how domestic, obvious, and honestly quite stupid Buck and Eddie are. Especially about each other. This would be something that would only happen to them.
Buck jogs up the stairs from the locker room, having gone to retrieve his wallet, and dramatically circling the island in the kitchen where the rest of the core team is hanging around. “Okay my beautiful team, I am off to get the goods.” His dramatic announcement is met with the cheers of people in desperate need of a pick me up from just sitting around and finding odd jobs to get done. “Please text me your orders, the lightning strike only gave me math powers and not a photographic memory.”
Hen rolls her eyes at his statement. “You say that like we don’t get the same thing every time and that the cafe knows us and our order by now.” She pats his shoulder before returning her attention to the game on her phone.
“Come on Henrietta-” Buck starts, but is interrupted with a swift slap on the back from her and his own laugh. “We have to be prepared. What if there's a new worker? Or there’s been a group accident and they’ve all experienced amnesia?"
Bobby laughs at his absurd imagination as Chimney cuts into the conversation. “You know Buckaroo, sometimes I worry about you and also wonder how you are completely related to my wife.”
Buck sticks his tongue out to Chim and begins to walk away, patting Eddie on the shoulder as he starts for the stairs.
“Uh Buck, forgetting something?” Eddie throws out in a sarcastic tone, pointing towards the kitchen island.
Buck turns around and starts walking towards Eddie cautiously, with a confused tilt to his head and furrowed eyebrows. Once he reaches Eddie he kisses him softly on the forehead, moving back to raise an eyebrow in question. Did I get it?
Eddie immediately flushes red and makes a strange noise of confusion, causing everyone else to look up. “No, Buck. You’re forgetting to-”
All Eddie is trying to do, is to tell Buck that he is about to leave his phone. The one he insisted someone text him the group's order on. The one he is going to use to pay even though he went through the effort of going down to the locker room to grab his wallet, just to come back up to the loft to say goodbye.
But he’s cut off by Buck gently grabbing his face and kissing him again. This time on the lips.
Eddie is a little disoriented and unaware of how long the kiss lasted when Buck pulls back, and he realizes his hands have somehow made it to Buck's waist. He removes one to grab the phone from the table and hold it up to Bucks chest. “Uh, no I didn’t mean that,” He stops to clear his throat, “but thank you?”
The silence that follows Buck choking on his spit, turning beat red, and running away is ringing in Eddie’s ears as he just sits there and stares in the direction Buck just left.
When he comes back to himself, everyone has returned to what they were previously doing except for Ravi. Who is just staring inquisitively at him like Eddie has an answer for what the fuck just happened. But he doesn’t. So-
“What the fuck just happened?!”
At his outburst, everyone’s heads snap to him.
Ravi just blinks at him. “Buck just kissed you. Twice.”
Hen and Chim jump out of their seats as Bobby makes a croaking noise.
“What! Wait what! That actually happened?” Hen yells out.
Chimney follows with, “I thought I just imagined that! I thought they were just being weird again but they actually kissed?”
“Guys, no. Buck kissed Eddie. For like five minutes.” Ravi said, still unmoved from his spot, still monotone, still in shock. Disbelief if you will.
Bobby, cool level headed Captain Bobby Nash, looks Eddie in the eyes and questions, with a questioning tone laced with care and patience. “And you let it happen?”
Eddie squeaks out “I think so?” Then he breathes in an abnormal amount of air. Holds it and his staring contest with Bobby. “I let it happen. I reciprocated. I kissed him back.” He breaks his stare then, to look at Hen and then the floor. Too caught up in his head to notice everyone but Ravi slowly getting up to move away.
“Okay, Eddie. We are gonna leave you here to think this over for a bit, yeah?” Hen, beautiful smart caring lovely smart Hen, speaks out gently while covering Chim’s mouth to hold him back from whatever he was pent up to say. Can you blame him when this has been a topic of conversation between his best friend and their wives for years.
It's here that Ravi finally breaks. As he stands to walk away he pleads with Eddie, “While you think this over, can you please, please, take into consideration the fact that you have been raising your kid together since you met him, him getting with Tommy had nothing to do with Tommy, and that people can go their whole lives not knowing they’re queer.”
“Ravi!” Hen and Bobby scold, while Chim releases a breath from behind Hen's hand. Someone had to say it.
At this request, Eddie looks up, “Yeah, Rav. Yeah I will, thanks.” Then he gets up and walks to the roof.
The group stands there in silence for a beat. “So much for an uneventful shift, huh?”
“Ravi so help me God if you ruin today I am going to give Buck a chainsaw.”
Buck is about to crash out.
“Maddie I am about to crash out.”
Buck is about to crash out and his sister has the nerve to laugh at him over the phone.
He has chosen to walk to the cafe. It’s about a thirty minute walk but he’s on pace to be there in ten. His hand is in his hair, he’s walking superhumanly fast, and he’s screaming. He looks insane. He feels insane. All the while Maddie continues falling over in hysterics at his pain and suffering.
“Maddie. Mads. I’m serious. I fucked up. Bad. Really bad. I have to leave the city- no I have to leave the country. I am so fucking stupid I don’t even know why my first thought was to do that. Maddie this is horrible I need to light myself on fire-”
“Evan!” There is a beat of silence following Maddie's interruption to his 30 mile per minute rant. “What did you do? What happened? It can’t be that bad, just slow down and take a breath.” Calm. Soothing. Maddie is the best sister on the planet.
By now, Buck has made it to the halfway point between the firehouse and the cafe. There’s a park bench nearby so he heeds his sister's words and has a seat.
“Okay. I’ve slowed down.” He gasps out, slumping into the back rest and tilting his face to the sky. Maybe if he basks in the sun enough he will be beamed to space. Or maybe he will get a sunburn so bad he’ll need a facial reconstruction surgery and he can form a new identity.
“What happened, Buck?” So patient. So understanding.
“I kissed Eddie. Twice. Once on the lips. In front of everyone.”
His sister knows him to his core. She knows he’s impulsive and a wreck and not normal. But she’s always so kind to him and holds back on her truths-
“Fucking what? Excuse me! You did what! Evan Theodore Leon Buckley! When I get my hands on you- You were just trying to convince me a few months ago that you can’t be in love with him because he’s straight. And I know for sure you have been trying to convince yourself every day since then, especially since you live together now too. And you kiss him? When you think he’s straight? Buck! In front of everyone!”
Okay so maybe one can only have so much patience. Almost 8 years is probably way more than most peoples cut off points.
Maddie won’t let him get a word in edge wise. Not that he’s trying hard to, there is not much to justify.
“I… I can’t even tell you why Maddie. I was leaving the station to go for the sweet treat run and I forgot my phone in the kitchen so Eddie called me over. He said ‘Buck, you forgetting something?’ like all jokey. And he’s been making me watch all these stupid rom coms and shit so I was like is this it? Is this a hint? Can I do this? Am I allowed to want him? so I kissed his forehead. And he just laughed and blushed and said ‘No you’re forgetting’ and then I cut him off because I’m fucking dumb! I just grabbed his face and he looked at me with those eyes and I folded. Maddie, I just folded. He didn’t look away or anything. So. I just kissed him.” Buck cuts off his rant with a big sigh, opening his eyes to look directly into the sun. Maybe he can wipe his memory this way.
But then he croaks out, “But he kissed me back. Maddie, he kissed me back and didn’t pull away until I did and I just stared at him and then he shoved my phone at me and then I ran away. I am actively running away to get to the cafe and pick up the sweet treat but I don’t think I can go back. What do I even do? Why did it have to be at work? Why do I have to do shit like this? How did I once again fuck up my family?”
The noise Maddie makes really makes him wish she was beside him. He needs a hug.
“Oh Buck. All you can do is give him some space and time. You get up and go get the pastries and coffee. You get up and go back to the station and just be present. Give him the option to keep space or talk to you. You know you’re always welcome with me and Howie, so don’t go fleeing the state. You’ve done that enough.” Sweet, gentle, smart, and all knowing Maddie Buckley-Han. She can calm him down almost as much as Eddie.
Buck pushes himself up to standing, still looking to the sky this time with a smile. “Yeah, you’re right Mads. Just gotta keep swimming.”
When Buck gets back to the firehouse with the pastries and coffees, having calmed down some, he considers dropping everything into the baby drop box and making a run for it. But that would be crazy so he enters through the open garage doors like a normal well adjusted adult. Just as he’s trying to crouch around the engine to stealthily drop off the goods before hiding away in the storage room he spots Ravi. Or well, Ravi spots him.
“Buck!”
“Ravi so help me God do not bring attention to me right now. Take this stuff so I can go hide.” Buck begs as he rushes towards Ravi to hand off the bags.
Ravi takes the bags from him and rolls his eyes. “You will not hide. I will not allow it. You will take Eddie’s treats and you will go to the roof and you will talk. Enough is enough and I will not sit by and keep letting this happen.”
“Wha- letting? Wait, why is Eddie on the roof?”
“Buck you have three seconds to start moving or I will go get a chainsaw.” Ravi huffs.
Bucks whines. “Why won’t you let me avoid this!”
“One. Two.” Buck doesn’t move. Ravi raises an eyebrow. “Thr-”
“Okay. God. Fine I am going. Are you happy?” Buck exasperates, throwing his hands out while starting up the stairs.
“Extremely.” Ravi’s eyes follow Buck up the stairs, and sees everyone else also staring at him. Then he calls out, “Foods here!”
By the time Buck has forced himself up every single step, he has prepared his speech of apologies and begging to be let into the house for at least tonight to retrieve his things. But-
But.
He sees Eddie sitting on the ledge of the roof, just staring at the skyline. Buck sees Eddie and he forgets his prepared words. Forgets every groveling word he pieced together since he was on the phone with Maddie. Buck sees Eddie and can only see this wonderful amazing person he has built so much with and can’t imagine a life without.
All he can think is that he will do anything to save his family and all he’s worked so hard to build.
So, he sits on the ledge next to Eddie, keeping his legs on the roof in case he needs to make a quick escape. The only acknowledgement he receives is Eddie’s slight lean towards him.
“I didn’t need my phone.”
His statement shocks Eddie out of his stare. He doesn’t speak yet, just looks over with a tilt to his head.
“Uh, I was right, a new person was at the cafe. But they have a print out of our order at the till. So I didn’t need my phone.” He doesn’t know why this was his first choice of words. But he’s said them. And he’s going with the flow. He’s slowing down.
Eddie hums at this before looking back to the skyline. “But you still used it to pay.”
Buck lets out a surprised laugh at that. “Uh yeah. I still used it to pay.”
Silence follows for a bit, and Buck takes the time to just stare at Eddie. This might be the last time he can freely do this without much guilt, so he just stares.
Then, Eddie moves his legs from off the ledge to onto the roof and just stares right back at Buck. His eyes don’t stop moving. They look all around his face and Buck can’t tell what that means. Is Eddie trying to see if he’s sincere? If he’s sorry? If he really kissed him and meant it?
Surprising Buck, Eddie laughs. One of his full belly laughs that Buck can’t not laugh along to. He is physically incapable of not laughing.
Eddie tries to speak through his laughter, “Why was your first- first thought to kiss me when- when I said you were forgetting something.”
At this point they’re both leaning on each other and wiping their own tears.
“I really don’t even know.” But then Buck sobers up. He means it when he says, “I just was looking at you and I just. I just needed to kiss you? Like we have been watching so many shows and movies where- where they say those things, y’know? And it always ends in a kiss. And maybe I thought it was a hint…” He trails off before looking Eddie in the eyes. “Or maybe I just wanted to kiss you-”
Buck might throw himself off of this roof. Or propose right here right now on it, because Eddie just cut him off by grabbing his face. Eddie is actively holding Buck's face in his hands and Buck might fling himself off of this roof in pure glee.
“Maybe I want to kiss you too.”
Buck is definitely going to throw himself off the roof.
The next thing Buck knows is that he's being pulled to standing and he’s being kissed so thoroughly he can’t do anything except hold onto Eddie for dear life. Then, he’s not and he’s staring at Eddie’s beautiful flushed face that’s holding a wide open smile.
Eddie’s hands drop to Bucks waist. “After you bolted, Ravi convinced me to think about why I let you kiss me. Why we have built the life we have where we are so sewn together. I’ve been on this roof doing that since.”
Buck just smiles and brings his hands to Eddie's shoulders, sliding them to his back. “Oh? And what did you come up with?”
In the most casual tone, Eddie drops the most loving statement Buck has ever heard directed at him. “I mostly landed on the fact that I built my dream life. A life with a partner who makes me happy and feel loved and seen. That I built a life where I can be free and be me. Where I can buy stupid decorations and frog shaped soap holders and pink sponges, and have the person I’m sharing my life with buy matchingly horrific throw pillows to match with the seasons. Who hangs his stupid bike he doesn’t ride up on the wall. A life where I have found someone who loves my son with every inch of him and doesn’t blink twice when stepping in and helping, even when no one's asked or help isn’t necessary. I found someone who puts us first and someone I want to put first.”
“Eddie, I am about to start crying.” Buck chokes out. “How am I supposed to compete with that?”
“You don’t.” Eddie states, bringing a hand to the back of Bucks head. “Save it for our vows, yeah?”
Through the crack in the door of the roof, their coworkers and best friends and family have crowded to watch everything unfold - pastries and coffee in hand. They quietly celebrate Buck and Eddie officially becoming BuckandEddie.
“Y’know Panikkar, I have to hand it to you. My wife has been working on that for close to a decade.”
Ravi smirks. “I just did what had to be done.”
Hen pats him on the back before the crowd turns to leave the new couple alone for the remaining ten minutes of their shift when-
“Are you fucking kidding me? I didn’t get to eat my danish!”
“Okay everyone! Get a move on, let’s go let’s go!”
They all get to the engine, waiting an additional thirty seconds for a certain someone.
As Eddie jumps into it, everyone greets him with a smile. He just gives them a shrug and looks out the window smiling as they drive off.