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Fear has never been part of Blade's dictionary, at least not ever since he took on said name and threw almost everything related to his past away.
It was natural.
After all, what's there for him to fear when he's an immortal monster? If he had any problems, he could easily solve it by brute force, regardless of how long and how many lives it would take.
That's why he couldn't immediately distinguish the emotion that rose within him when he felt his bracer, the only thing that he held on to from his past, turn cold.
It was currently a rest day for Blade and he was bored out of his mind.
Don't get him wrong, he was thankful that he had some time for himself without any work or mara (thanks to Kafka) to disturb him but he had absolutely nothing to do.
He would go to Firefly and listen to her chat about all sorts of things, her soft voice usually succeeding in distracting his brain from thinking about... things, but the girl was currently on a solo mission and wouldn't be back any time soon.
He could go shopping with Kafka and help her carry her bags as a way of silently thanking her for controlling his mara but he didn't feel like carrying a hundred bags right now or listening to her tease him about his relationship with Yinyue-Jun.
̶T̶h̶e̶y̶ ̶w̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶o̶n̶l̶y̶ ̶e̶n̶e̶m̶i̶e̶s̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶w̶e̶r̶e̶ ̶d̶e̶s̶t̶i̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶d̶i̶e̶.̶ ̶N̶o̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶m̶o̶r̶e̶,̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶l̶e̶s̶s̶.̶
Going to Silver Wolf was out of the question. Not only because he can't understand her words most of the time but because she always wants him to play with her, something he can't do when his hands are ruined to the point of no return.
As for Elio... well, he has always been a mysterious leader, often only seen when he wants to so the chances of him entertaining Blade was lower than zero.
Thus, he could only lie down on his bed and hope that sleep would be merciful enough to take him to a quiet dreamland where no nightmares flooded his mind.
̶I̶t̶ ̶n̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶d̶o̶e̶s̶.̶
"Bladie, you there?" Kafka's voice woke Blade up, his face filled with sweat as he looked at the door with alertness, only relaxing when he confirmed that he was in his room and not anywhere near Jingliu (he would never admit it but her action of killing him a thousand times haunted him until today).
"What?" he asked with a slightly hoarse voice.
"Elio has a script for us," Kafka responded with an amused tone. "You sound panicked, Bladie, anything wrong? Perhaps a dream gone bad?"
Blade scowled at her teasing.
"I'll be there at ten," he said, ignoring her words as he stood up with a muffled groan, his back aching as usual, as he headed to the bathroom to shower and change clothes.
True to his word, Blade arrived at the living room after ten minutes.
"Punctual as always, Bladie," Kafka smiled from the couch she was sitting on as she touched up her nails that looked completely fine to him.
Blade simply nodded. "The script?"
Elio always sent the script to the Stellaron Hunters who would go do a mission which naturally included Blade but because of his damaged hands, he preferred to simply ask the others unless it was a solo mission.
"Something simple," Kafka replied as she checked her nails one last time before standing up. "We simply have to kill a bunch of idiots who thought it was a good idea to mess up Elio's script. I could do it myself since it's your rest day today but unfortunately, Elio said that they had some tricks up their sleeves so it would be better for you to come."
So an assassination mission? Simple indeed. As for the rest of her words... well, it's true that it would be better for him to fall for their tricks then Kafka considering he can revive so he didn't take any offense to it. Actually, he was thankful to be able to do something since he wasn't in the mood to go back to sleep, not after the dream he just had.
He nodded and headed straight to the door, Kafka following behind with light steps as she hummed a song that landed on one ear and out the other until they reached the car that would take them to their target.
With Blade and Kafka's years of experience, the mission of killing eight hundred and thirteen people was as easy as breathing so it only took them twenty minutes to succeed.
It was actually a bit disappointing for Blade considering he wanted something challenging to take his mind off everything. Instead, the most he got was a bunch of guys, obviously cannon fodders, running towards them with untested bombs wrapped around their bodies.
And while the bombs did have the power to kill an ordinary human and even injure Kafka, Blade wasn't just anybody so he had no hesitation in killing them and throwing the bombs at the others who panicked and tried to flee but failed due to Kafka using her Spirit Whisper to order them to stand still.
Blade casually swung his sword to get rid of the blood that managed to stain it as Kafka sighed in disappointment while staring at her coat which had a small red stain on the left shoulder.
"What a shame, I liked this coat too," she said, confusing Blade as she had around fifteen copies of the same exact jacket in her cabinet. She then turned to him with a smile. "Since we finished early, why don't we go shopping?"
Blade frowned, opening his mouth to reject her offer, when his arm started to feel a little tingly. He frowned as he raised his arm, looking at the bracer as if it wronged him while wondering what was happening to it. Was it malfunctioning? Well, it has been over seven hundred years already so it wouldn't be a surprise if it did break although it would be a shame since he would lose his most convenient tool for tracking Yinyue-Jun down.
Oh well, Silver Wolf can always hack the Express so it wasn't much of a hassle.
̶H̶e̶ ̶w̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶n̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶a̶d̶m̶i̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶o̶u̶g̶h̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶b̶r̶e̶a̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶d̶ ̶h̶i̶s̶ ̶h̶e̶a̶r̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶a̶c̶h̶e̶.̶
"Something wrong, Bladie?" Kafka asked when she noticed his unusual action.
"No," Blade responded after a few more moments of silence as he put his arm back down and looked at Kafka. "To both."
"Both?" Kafka raised a brow before sighing in disappointment. "Come now, Bladie, are you really saying no to me? Don't you like spending time with me?"
Blade wanted to roll his eyes, knowing that Kafka was saying such words simply because she wanted him to come and carry her bags to make her shopping much easier. However, knowing that she could easily use her Spirit Whisper to control him to come, he decided against it and instead replied why he didn't want to come in a... nicer way.
"I'm busy," he said.
"With what?" Kafka asked with a tilt of her head. "Last I checked, you were sleeping since it was your rest day."
"Yes, rest day," Blade repeated with a nod. "I-"
He wanted to say that he wanted to get some rest but got interrupted by the burning sensation he felt in his arm with the bracer on.
Wincing a little, he once again raised his arm and touched the bracer, only to find it cold to touch.
He frowned.
For as long as he could remember, the bracer never felt anything but warm. The only time it got remotely cold was when he stabbed Yinyue-Jun in the heart in order to force him to reveal his true form so that he could assist the Luofu in defeating the lord Ravager.
This was different, though.
Not only was it cold but it was starting to feel freezing even with his arm covered by his coat.
"What's happening..." he murmured as Kafka frowned at him, her gaze falling to the bracer.
"Is something wrong with it?" she asked. While she doesn't know the full details of the bracer, she knew it was the most important thing to him so she prepared herself to cast her Spirit Whisper in case he went on a rampage from anger.
"I... don't know," he couldn't help but reply honestly, his attention all focused on the bracer that was becoming colder by the second. "I... this isn't normal, it's not supposed to be happening. It has always been warm so why is it cold? I-"
"Listen to me: calm down, Bladie."
Blade blinked as he felt his mind clear up, belatedly realizing that he was panicking just moments before which confused him.
Just why was he panicking? He had no reason to, right? After all, there were plenty of possible reasons as to why the bracer went cold such as Yinyue-Jun entering an extremely cold area or carelessly dropping the bracer in cold water.
Even with those thoughts, however, he couldn't help but feel his heart beat abnormally as he felt his insides clench from something he couldn't name...
It wasn't excitement nor was it nervousness...
Just what was it?
This feeling...
It was on the tip of his tongue...
Ah, he finally remembered it.
Fear.
He was scared and he knew why.
It was because of Yinyue-Jun.
He was afraid of the possibility that Yinyue-Jun was dying.
After all, as people said, love and hate stood against each other with a thin line between them so even if he hated Yinyue-Jun for everything he did to him, he couldn't deny the fact that there was something else between them, something that he has been scared to name all this time but knew he could no longer deny it, not when he was forced to face his feelings now.
"Bladie-"
He interrupted Kafka with shaky eyes as he spoke in a panicked tone. "I have to see Elio. Now."
Kafka didn't say anything and just nodded, the two of them rushing back to the car as Kafka kindly took the driver's seat and drove them back to their temporary base which he was grateful for. After all, he didn't think he could drive in his current condition.
'Be safe, you fool,' Blade thought as he leaned on his seat tensely, his hand never leaving the bracer as he felt it remain cold. No, it was actually turning colder by the second which was sending warning bells in his head.
'Faster,' he wanted to tell Kafka. 'I want to go see Elio now.'
Fortunately, he still retained some of his senses so he didn't say anything, knowing that she was already driving the fastest she could without causing any accidents.
That doesn't change the fact that he felt irritated inside, though.
He stayed like that for a couple of minutes, his eyes tightly closed as he bit his lips in order to prevent himself from speaking when he suddenly recalled something. Grabbing his phone, he texted Elio to ask what was happening to the Express but received no reply which was unusual since Elio was usually a fast texter, always near his phone to answer their questions and prevent anything wrong from happening during a mission.
Seeing that there was no reply even after a couple of minutes, Blade felt his heart drop as he immediately tried to get through Silver Wolf. However, as his hands kept shaking from nervousness, he decided to switch tactics and called her instead.
"What is it? I was in the middle of a game," Silver Wolf glared at him in displeasure though there was a hint of nervousness behind it. After all, Blade rarely called her, especially during a mission so she felt a bit worried that something wrong happened and they needed backup. "Honestly, you better have a good reason as to why you're calling or el-"
"The Express," he interrupted her as he spoke in a demanding tone. "Where are they now?"
Silver Wolf blinked before frowning. "Is that all yo-"
She stopped talking, finally noticing his urgent tone. "Wait a minute."
There were random sounds he couldn't be bothered to focus on as he felt time fly slowly.
"The Express..." Silver Wolf hesitated a little. "It's not going anywhere, just stuck in space for some reason."
Well, that was hint number one that something wrong happened. After all, the Express never stayed in space for too long, always entering new worlds to help and visit in the name of trailblazing.
"And their last destination?" Kafka decided to ask when she noticed his silent panicking.
"Lem'me check," the hacker said as more sounds of keyboard tapping was heard until she scowled in obvious annoyance. "Tch, Herta's space station."
The space station of the genius Silver Wolf hates? Well, that was fifty-fifty. However, based on the coldness in his arm, he knew that the Express most likely went to her for help instead of her asking them for something.
That was hint number two.
Hint number three came in a simple manner: the bracer turned stone cold, causing his unfortunately still beating heart to plummet down his stomach.
'No,' he thought with a nervous exhale. 'I must be imagining things. This... there's no way Yinyue-Jun, someone capable of fighting against lord Ravagers on his own, would die out in space. Yes, something probably just happened to the bracer and he was worrying for absolutely no reason at all.
Yeah, no.
No matter how hard he tried to believe those words, he knew that the chances of them being facts were low so he impatiently slammed the car door open and ran towards the base, ignoring the beeping sounds coming from around him as he jumped on the cars that were blocking his way.
There was no way he would waste another second sitting in the car while obediently waiting for the traffic to pass, not when he wanted answers right this instance.
"Where's Elio," Blade demanded the moment he opened the door to their base, his voice filled with fury as he stormed inside.
"He's in his room," Silver Wolf said while pointing upstairs with a tense expression, her phone discarded on the sofa as she looked at him with wary eyes. He couldn't blame her, not when he felt the mara threatening to consume his mind once again even with Kafka's order restraining it from succeeding.
"Thanks," he said before heading straight to Elio's room, Silver Wolf following both as a precaution and out of curiosity, and slammed the door open, only to stop in his tracks when he saw the state of the room.
Papers were scattered all across the room as Elio was busy writing something on his table, a stressed expression on his face.
"What happened here?" Silver Wolf couldn't help but ask, snapping Blade out of his confusion. "Did a tornado hit or something?"
"Where's Yinyue-Jun," Blade demanded as he approached the table.
"Ah, Blade, you're here," Elio greeted with a calm voice, the pen in his hand never stopping. "Welcome."
"Cut the formalities," Blade scowled. "Where is he?"
Elio pursed his lips and stayed silent, infuriating Blade who swiped the papers on the table away with one hand before slamming the other down.
"Where. Is. He." he interrogated with a fierce glare.
"I don't know," Elio sighed tiredly as he slumped onto his chair.
"You don't know?" Silver Wolf raised a brow as she finally approached them. "What do you mean by that? They're obviously in space with the trailblazer and dragon boy on that Amphoreus planet, right?"
"Amphoreus?" Blade raised a brow but got ignored.
"I know that part," Elio sighed heavily. "But that's all. Everything related to the trailblazer and Dan Heng are... blurry right now."
"And what do you mean by that?" Kafka asked as she entered the room, looking around the room with dissatisfaction. "It must be something serious if you turned out this way."
"I mean what I said," Elio said. "Everything was still following the script until just moments ago when the words started to change repeatedly like it couldn't decide what was happening to them."
He picked up the paper he was writing on before from the ground and turned it towards them.
"Have a look," he said as the three turned their attention to it.
"It's... glitching?" Silver Wolf was the first to react with a shocked expression. "Wh- isn't this the first time this happened? Just what's happening?"
Elio simply shook his head.
"Then you don't know what's going on with Yinyue-Jun?" Blade asked in a quiet voice, his hand touching the cold bracer in his arm as he felt all hope disappear from his sight, the chances of his ̶b̶e̶l̶o̶v̶e̶d̶ enemy dead increasing to ninety percent.
"I'm sorry, Blade," Elio simply said.
Silver Wolf frowned at the sight of Blade looking at the ground with dull eyes and turned to Elio. "What's the last thing the script said before it became this jumbled mess?"
Elio stayed silent for a few moments before opening his mouth to speak when Blade spoke first.
"He's dead, isn't he?" Blade whispered in a low voice, his hair casting a shadow over his eyes as Silver Wolf felt a shiver cross her spine, Kafka standing upright while looking at him warily.
"Indeed," was the only word Elio could say.
"You liar!" Blade's head shot up, his eyes glowing red, as he summoned his sword before rushing towards Elio with fury etched on his face.
"Listen to me: stop, Blade," Kafka ordered, causing Blade to freeze but only for a moment, his rage somehow melting away the invisible threads holding onto him as he continued charging towards Elio who was quick enough to jump out of the way.
Kafka frowned and grabbed her gun as Silver Wolf tensed, her heart beating quickly as she tried to think of ways to be helpful in this fight. After all, she was never a fighter so she could offer little assistance right now.
"Call Firefly and check if she's near," Kafka ordered before she shot Blade on the shoulders, breaking Silver Wolf from her thoughts.
"Got it," Silver Wolf nodded as she immediately got to work, her hands briefly shaking before she steeled it, and left the room.
'Please be fine,' she thought as she snuck one last glance at the room that was starting to sound chaotic. After all, while she would never admit it to anyone, she truly didn't want to see the group fall right now.
Defeating Blade was a hard task.
Defeating Blade who was mara-struck was a challenging task.
Defeating Blade who was mara-struck and blinded by rage was an almost impossible task.
Kafka tched as Blade's sword stabbed her on the shoulder.
'He really owes me for this,' she thought as she glanced at her ruined jacket while dodging an attack.
It had been twenty minutes since they began fighting and Kafka knew that she wouldn't be able to last much longer, not when her Spirit Whisper was useless against Blade's grief-torn mind. It didn't help that he was somehow becoming stronger by the minute while she was losing her energy by the second.
'How can I get him to stop?' she mused, her eyes darting around the room until her gaze landed on the paper on the ground. 'Ah.'
"Blade, listen to me," she commanded as she parried another attack. "Everything's fine. Your dragon boy will return safely. After all, wasn't that part of the promise Elio made with you?"
Just as she expected, Blade briefly paused, that hesitation being the opening she needed to defeat him as she immediately struck him in the chest, finally killing him and stopping his rampage.
She sighed in relief as she relaxed her body.
"Of course he'd stop when I mention his dragon boy," Kafka sighed as she looked at the dead Blade on the ground with a mixture of fondness and exasperation. "And he still claims that he hates him."
"That's what happens when you're blinded by rage," Elio said from behind his desk where he returned to when Blade started focusing on Kafka. "Well, I suppose that's what makes his script interesting."
"I suppose it spices things up," Kafka agreed as she leaned on his desk. "So, do you truly not know what's happening in Amphoreus?"
"The paper I showed you all is indeed true," Elio calmly nodded. "Although I might have... twisted some of my words."
"I knew it," Kafka said with a slight smirk. "So, care to share what's happening?"
Elio hummed a little. "Let's just say that a little dragon needs to die before gaining more strength."
Waking up wasn't something Blade wanted, especially not when he recalled the details of what happened before he died.
Groaning a little, he blinked his grogginess away as he sat up from his bed (it seems like the others, most likely Firefly in her Sam form, carried him to his room) and glanced at the (still) cold bracer on his arm.
"So it wasn't a dream," he whispered as he removed the bracer from his arm before hugging it close to his heart with close eyes.
"Yinyue..." he softly called out as he felt tears (so he still does have some tears to shed, after all. And here he thought it vanished when his humanity disappeared from him after he reforged himself into a weapon of destruction) fall down his face. "Dan Heng..."
Why was life so cruel?
Why did fate have to rip them apart just when they were starting to remove the hostility between them?
He remembered the words Dan Heng told him in the Luofu.
"If you wish, I'll accompany you til the end."
"You liar," he said with a quivering voice. "Both you and Elio... I hate you."
Wasn't forcing him to live with immortality cruel enough? Why did Dan Feng, now Dan Heng, have to give him hope that they could fix their broken relationship just to take it all away by dying?
"Dan Heng... please... don't do this to me..."
He hugged the cold bracer tighter as he mouthed his most desperate plea to the empty room.
"Please don't make me live in a universe without you."