Work Text:
It had been an incredible hot day merging into an incredible hot evening. The witchers were sitting in the salon of the old fortress they called their home. Eskel was browsing through a fishing magazine, Vesemir was preoccupied with Hemingway’s “For whom the bell tolls” and Geralt was fiddling with his new mobile phone, presumably writing messages to Yennefer.
Lambert enjoyed the silence. Eyes closed, he stretched in the comfy armchair he had claimed for himself and took a gulp of his beer. It was so hot that he felt the fabric of his shirt sticking to his back. He could take a cold shower but that would require rising and going to his bathroom, an effort he wasn’t willing to make. To be honest, he wasn’t willing to do anything this evening but relaxing.
When he heard the massive wooden front door banging he knew that his wish for a nice and calm evening wouldn’t come true. None of the other witchers did as much as react to the sound of bouncy footsteps in the hallway. There was only one person entering the castle like this. And judging by her way of walking, a strange but very familiar mixture of hopping and running, she was either very excited or very cheerful. Probably both. He sighed and opened his eyes.
She grinned widely when she entered the salon. “Hello, boys!” He managed a nod combined with a short smile, the others waved at her. Nobody could bring himself to welcome her properly, the incredible heat had taken its toll on all of them. Well, except for Vica. Wearing a short blue dress showing her rather nice legs, her face reddened and her hair in a messy braid she was glowing with energy.
“What’s wrong with you? It’s summer! Adventure time! And you’re sitting here like a bunch of retirees.”
Vesemir laid his book aside. “Given our age, we could very well be, young lady.”
She continued grinning and with a swift movement she hopped onto Lambert’s lap.
“Are you mad? You could’ve hurt me.” Before he could say anything else, he felt her lips pressed on his. They were as warm as the rest of her and although he rather enjoyed the kiss and her body pressed against his own he just couldn’t stand the heat she radiated. With a halfhearted push he freed himself.
“It’s hotter than hell in here even without you sitting on my lap.”
Sighing, she unraveled their embrace and stood up. Eskel, who had watched the scene, smirked. “Should use that golden opportunity. Or it could’ve been the last time she did something with your lap.”
Lambert rolled his eyes. “Eskel, I take it that you’re gravely underfucked, but that doesn’t go for me. And the pup does have the unnerving characteristic of always coming back.”
While Vesemir shook his head in disapproval of Lambert’s comment, Geralt just laughed and Eskel and Vica exchanged amused glances.
“Yeah, until she doesn’t anymore.” Eskel murmured while blinking at Vica.
“There’s no better man than me and the pup’s very well aware of this. And fucking stop blinking at her. She’s mi… ,” he could stop himself just before saying something stupid, “well, she’s not yours, actually.”
“True.” Eskel opened a beer and handed it to Vica, who nodded thankfully and took a sip.
“Actually I belong to nobody but myself, Lambert. And I’m here because…”
“Vica, it’s been a hard day. I don’t care why you’re here. You’re very welcome to sit down, drink a beer and be quiet. But I’m not going to do anything with you.”
She moaned and tugged at his sleeve. “There’s no rest for the wicked, you know? I’ve got a great idea!”
He shook his head. “No. Not today. Sit down and behave like an actual grown-up, would you?”
Geralt looked up. “Can’t mind her behavior. You act like a pampered five-year-old all the time, that can cause something in other persons.”
“True,” added Eskel, “and you can be glad that it’s just some hyperactivity in her case and not the urgent need to throw a knife at you.”
“Enough of that,” Vesemir intervened.
Lambert closed his eyes again, hearing Vica tapping her feet against the ground and playing with her beer bottle. After some moments he gave up.
“Fine, pup. Tell pray before you get a stroke.”
She grinned at him with that unbearable glance of triumph in her eyes. “So, I was in the woods today.”
“As we’re all able to see because there are still leaves in your hair.”
“Anyway,” she brushed her hand trough her hair, removing the remains of her trip, “I found a nice lake and a waterfall and I wanted to know if you’d wanna come see it with me?”
He sighed. “As I told you before it’s fucking hot. I’m going nowhere.”
“But it’s a waterfall. With a lake. It’s chill there. Because of cooling by evaporation.”
“Because of WHAT? Vica, my brain is melting. Don’t come up with stupid scientific phrases.”
“You don’t understand those phrases no matter what.” Geralt laughed. “Go on, Vica, that’s fun.”
“I do understand scientific issues very well because I’m actually smarter than you.”
“Is that so?” The white haired witcher raised an eyebrow.
“Yes. I’m not as stupid as to fuck a horde of sorceresses.”
“Enough, I said.” Vesemir growled. “Lambert, cooling by evaporation means that the water…”
Lambert threw his hands up. “Fuck that. I don’t even wanna know.” He raised and glanced at Vica. “Y’know, I guess being with you at a somewhat hot lake is still better than bearing the company of those three morons.” He straightened his shirt. “I’ll get the keys and the helmets and you try not to destroy anything.”
Vica nodded. When Lambert was gone, she high-fived the other three witchers. “Thank you, guys.”
“Should throw him in that lake, y’know? To clear his head.” Eskel suggested.
“Or leave him there.” Geralt interjected.
Vica shook her head. “That’d be pretty mean.”
“And what he does to you isn’t? My dear child, I can’t comprehend why you endure his endless foolery.” Vesemir declared.
She shrugged. “Barking dogs never bite. I got used to his behavior. And beneath those many layers of bitterness and sarcasm there’s a heart. Quite a big one, actually. But don’t tell him.”
In that moment Lambert came back and threw one helmet to Vica. “Don’t tell me what?”
“That she doesn’t like your beard.” Geralt offered.
“Fuck you.” He took Vica by the hand and together they left the Kaer. When they reached his Hayabusa in the yard, he gave her a piercing look. “You really don’t like it?”
She smiled. “Scratches sometimes. But it’s alright.” She gave him a quick kiss.
“Fine. So, where is your evaporated lake?”
***
He watched the scenery. The pup hadn’t promised too much. In a forest clearing they’d found the waterfall. It wasn’t too big, but beautiful nonetheless. The lake around held clear blue water and it was pleasantly cool out here.
She beamed at him. “Do you like it?”
He nodded. “It’s quite acceptable.”
“You’re awful. Why not just admitting that it’s beautiful here?”
“Because I’d rather save the word “beautiful” for other things.”
She raised her brow. “What things?”
He smirked. “The impaled head of a Wyvern on a Sunday morning.”
She sighed. “Yeah, I guess that a lousy waterfall isn’t able to match that sight.”
He noticed that she had doffed her shoes and was undoing the buttons of her dress.
“What exactly are you doing there?”
“I wanna cool down. It is quite hot indeed and the water’s just great!”
He simply stood and watched her getting undressed. When she was finally naked she darted him a provoking look. “You joining or not?” Without waiting for his response she ran into the water.
That’s something I’d consider beautiful, he thought while he unbuttoned his shirt.