Work Text:
Yoo Sangah couldn't sleep that night.
"Sangah-ssi."
Yoo Sangah turned her head around, her expression relaxing as she saw it was none other than Kim Dokja. She made a little hand wave to him.
Kim Dokja wasn’t much of a talker if it wasn’t about the routes they would take on the next scenario. So Yoo Sangah was a little surprised when Kim Dokja settled down next to her and asked her a question.
“...Sangah-ssi, you also like fantasy novels, am I right?”
He remembers our conversation about novels.
“Ah, yes… although I am not as familiar with fantasy novels as I am with classic literature novels, I have read a few known ones and liked them. I remember myself liking Lord of the Rings so much when I was little.”
Kim Dokja nodded.
“I am not surprised. You seemed excited that I mentioned it in the subway.”
At that time, it was really hard for Kim Dokja to say that he read web novels as a hobby (And it would be still, if it did matter in the current time in the scenarios and the apocalypse). He had glanced at the title of the novel in the app.
[The World after the Fall]
Author: SingNshong.
He couldn't say that he was reading 'The World after the Fall by SingNshong'.
"It's just a fantasy novel. It's... What was it again? Right, Lord of the Rings, it's kind of like that..."
Yoo Sangah's eyes widened. "Aha. The Lord of the Rings. I've also seen the movies."
"Yes, the movies are good."
Silence followed. Yoo Sangah was still looking in his direction and seemed to be waiting for him to say something.
Although back in that time Kim Dokja had just said the famous novel series’ name just to avoid telling about his obscure interests, Sangah's eyes were widened and she seemed eager to continue conversing.
A comfortable silence fell between them. This silence wasn’t like the one they had back in the subway. It wasn't uncomfortable.
Then Yoo Sangah broke the silence.
“I used to imagine I would go on an adventure when I grow up.”
Kim Dokja teared his gaze away from the stars and looked at Yoo Sangah.
“Really?”
“Yeah. My mom used to tell me I would stop dreaming about such stupid things when I grow up. The thing was, I never stopped.”
Kim Dokja nodded as he let Sangah continue. Despite her warm demeanor towards their companions, Sangah didn’t usually talk like this: About herself, or her life. Back in the company, Dokja had thought of her as an extroverted person; the perfect model employee. But now he started to notice that despite her kindness, Sangah was ultimately a reserved person.
“I always did continue imagining that one day I would set on an adventure like in the books I have read. Actually, when I first started at the company, completely disregarding my parents’ request. I had a hope that this would be my adventure. But it turned out to be not. Because people who put me in boxes, labels, existed here too. And most of them were even harsher than my parents ever were. So secretly, I continued dreaming. Dreaming that some day, I would also have a chance to prove myself just like the heroes in the fantasy books. Where you were surrounded by people who believed you were more than you show. Where you were given a chance from the universe to prove yourself. Cause I am afraid, in the real world; Things exactly don’t happen like that. You have to create your own chance, which was a lot harder than I thought. That’s why, I started foolishly dreaming that something would happen. And something did happen, back in the subway… But my adventure turned out to be quite different. Much more… cruel.”
She looked at her hands.
“It was a selfish wish.”
Kim Dokja finally spoke. “All human wishes are selfish in the end. Don’t put yourself down because you are behaving like a human.” After all, Kim Dokja also secretly did always hope something like this would happen too. However, he was surprised Sangah also wished so. She was already like a heroine even before the scenarios… Or did he think so? How much did he really know about Sangah before?
“You are always like this Dokja-ssi.” Yoo Sangah's voice broke Dokja's train of thought.
“Like what?” Dokja looked at her warm light brown eyes. Or was it amber…? He shook his head.
“You always talk like this, yet in the end, you are the most cruel to yourself among us.”
Kim Dokja didn’t answer.
Yoo Sangah looked at Kim Dokja’s unreadable expression.
“Dokja-ssi, you sometimes forget you are also a human.”
Sangha took a deep breath.
“I know you go extra hard on yourself to protect us, however…
We don’t just rely on your capabilities, you know. We… rely on you. ”
[Fourth Wall is slightly shaking.]
Dokja’s gaze returned to her eyes.
“So please Dokja-ssi, try taking better care of yourself.”
She smiled. Dokja smiled back. not a mocking smile, not a nervous smile, but a genuine, small smile.
“I will try,” he answered.
“Sangah-ssi.” Dokja suddenly added. Yoo Sangah looked at him curiously. “hm?”
“You too.”
“What?”
“You should also take better care of yourself, you know. You’re always listening to others, easing their worries… But when will you ease yours?”
Yoo Sangah stayed silent for a moment.
“You have a point.”
She added.
“Maybe we are not really different, Dokja-ssi.”
[The Fourth Wall is shaking violently!]
Kim Dokja couldn’t believe his ears. Sangah was seriously comparing herself to someone like him? Someone as-
“I know what you think Dokja-ssi.” Yoo Sangah’s words interrupted his thoughts once again.
“You think I am nothing like you. That’s also why when you disappeared before, you have let me know your plans first.”
She looked at him almost intensely. Kim Dokja could feel the Fourth Wall shaking. Fourth Wall, the ability which even suppressed the pressure of a calamity, was now shivering in front of this perceptive woman.
“Did you really leave me your position because you think of me as a Heroine or deep down you know we are not really different?”
[The Fourth Wall is violently shaking!]
“I know you don’t think highly of yourself. So you probably don’t see it, or don’t want to. But we are. and it doesn’t bother me, Dokja-ssi.”
[The Fourth Wall is violently shaking!]
“It shouldn’t bother you either. Because even If you don’t, know that I think highly of you. and I always will. You helped me…”
“Helped you?” Kim Dokja interrupted, his voice was a tone of disbelief.
“You helped me come in peace with the parts of myself I didn’t want to acknowledge before. If I was able to come here this far…”
She turned her head to fully face him.
“I told you before, haven’t I? It’s because I believed in someone. And that someone is you. You have teached me many things. that making a change doesn’t always mean being a perfect hero.”
“What does change mean for you then, Sangah-ssi?”
“Love.”
“Love?” Kim Dokja chuckled.
“Love. Your love for stories afterall, was what brought us this far. not strength, mind, but love.”
That wasn’t wrong. If Kim Dokja didn’t love TWSA so much… If he hadn’t wished to see the ending… in the first place, they would have died in that subway car. However, this wasn’t what he wished to know.
“That’s… correct, Sangha-ssi. However, I was asking about you. ”
“Well, If you wish to see the novel’s end… I wish to see the ending of our story. That’s the story I have grown to love.”
“Our story?”
“Don’t you remember I talked in the fourth wall’s library before I went to reincarnate?”
Of course he remembered. He never forget. Deep down, he always wished they could just sit like that and talk for hours.
“I meant every word. I love our story, Dokja-ssi. I love your story too. Even the chapters you don’t like. I don’t wish to change any part of it. I just… want to be a part of it.”
[The Fourth Wall is violently shaking!]
Was she saying what he thought…? No, he wouldn’t dare to hope.
“I know this is a stupid confession to make at this time. But, we are about to reach the end. So… I wish to tell you in case we get too busy with other things.”
“Sangah-ssi,” Dokja said softly.
“I wish to see the end of our story too.”
He looked at her.
“And I deeply wish you to be a part of it as well."
They both looked at each other. Without saying anything, their fingers have intertwined.
Sangah looked at the stars. “The night is quite beautiful today, isn’t it?”
“Yes, it is indeed quite beautiful.”
But Kim Dokja wasn’t looking at the night sky.
He was looking at Yoo Sangah.