Chapter Text
"A loving heart was better and stronger than wisdom"
I remember the first time that I read those words when I read them in high school. I never truly understand what the author was talking about. Before I met her I thought that love made people weak and do stupid things. I never understood the true wisdom behind these words. I had always believed that nothing was stronger than knowledge it had been something that I had strived for my entire life, it consumed me. I had never felt true love in my life. That true love, that love that makes you forgot about all of your other burdens and problems because you are in love.
I did not come from the most loving of households when I was growing up so I never really understand the power of love. I had closed myself off from love at an early age in order to pursue my dreams; I thought that you had to choose between your dreams and love. I would never believe it would take just one girl break through my defenses and teach me how to love; how powerless we are in the face of true love.
As I jogged down the streets of Boston on a cold fall day I could see my breath rising. I did the same run every morning, without fail, it was somewhat freeing making the run around Beacon Hill. There was something peaceful about the city before most of the city woke up, even in a city of more than half a million people it seemed peaceful and I could be alone with her thoughts.
Every morning she felt like a weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. There was the occasional person and from time to time she had run into trouble with the people of the common. As I made my way up the down Bowdoin Street I stopped at Capitol Coffee. I had been coming her since I had first moved to the city.
"Hey Mario, can I get a…"
But, before I could even finish my sentence he set down a hot tea on the counter. "You know I could set my watch by your run. Every day you walk through that door. Which makes me wonder what do you do when we happened to be closed?"
I smiled and said, "Well, I go down the street and grab a tea from Starbucks. What is the difference right?"
The Old Italian man let out a deep booming laughed, grabbed his chest, and said, "Oww, blondie that hurts."
I smiled wider, the old man knew I was joking; he was right I had been coming to this coffee shop ever since I moved to my current apartment five years ago. He was one of the few people that I actually talked to outside of work; normally I was a very private person but there was something about this man that made me open up to him. He reminded me a lot of my grandfather before he passed away, and there was no pressure with this relationship, he had no hidden agenda or anything; he just sat behind his counter and listened to me talk about life.
I remembered the first day that I walked in to the shop, I was having a rough day and there was Mario with a huge smile, a large tea, and all of the time in the world to listen to me. He just sat down next to me and listened to me for hours; even though I was sure that he had better things to be doing then talking to a stranger about her life. And ever since then he had been there to talk to me whenever I needed it, he was like a therapist, or at least a bartender
"So, anything exciting happen at the hospital recently?" asked Mario.
"Actually it has been pretty slow lately, which I am glad for it gives me more time to focus on my research."
Mario gave her an appraising look before saying, "Lauren if you don't like working in the hospital why don't you change jobs, my cousin works for a biotech company in Cambridge I am sure that you could go work for a company like that."
I smiled and said, "There is a great deal of satisfaction that I get from helping others, and working as a surgeon is one of the best ways that I can help people. If I wasn't a surgeon I wouldn't have been able to help you, and then where would I get my tea from?"
Mario laughed, "Well from what you told me from a Starbucks down the road."
I laughed, smiled and said, "You know that there has not been a day in the past two years that you have not been open. You are even open during blizzards."
"Well, someone has to give you your caffeine, but I am not going to be here forever. So, much as I enjoy seeing you in my shop every day I would like it if some day you didn't come into my shop."
I looked at him, I had to admit that hurt a little bit. What did he mean? He must have noticed the look on my face because he quickly continued.
"You know Lauren, one day you are going to find someone who is going to make you want to sleep in, and not be out here running the common with all of the drug addicts and homeless people. Someone who makes you forget that you are addicted to caffeine because they give you that same rush.'
The smile instantly fell from my face and I took the cup and said, "You know that is never going to happen Mario; so I guess that you will be seeing me until you retire."
I turned around and pushed open the door as Mario called after me, "I don't buy that for one second Lauren, everyone has someone out there and you will find yours one day; whether you believe it or not."
I just shook my head and walked the rest of the way home. Mario really had a way of digging down, I know that he only wanted me to happy and that he looked at me like his own daughter but he still got to me sometimes. I was perfectly happy with my life the way it is now, my work keeps me satisfy.
As I got lost in my thoughts I didn't even realize that I had made it back to my apartment. I pulled my keys out my pocket, grabbed the paper off the front step, and opened the front door. As I stepped into the house I flipped on the light. My apartment is a sparse place; the only thing I used it for was a place to sleep at night. Some people might think that it lacks the feel of a true home back I liked it.
I kicked off my running shoes off and set them on the shoe rack by the door. I grabbed the paper and opened it as I walked through the house to my study. There had been another murder, one of the star witnesses in the case against one of the local gang leaders had turned up dead in the Fenway area, shot in the back of his head.
I closed the paper and threw it in the trash, there was never any good news in the paper these days. I walked through the living room to the bathroom, took off my clothes and turned on the shower. I stepped into the hot shower, it was so soothing on a crisp fall day, after a good run. I felt refreshed and energized when I stepped out of the shower twenty minutes later I felt amazing.
I walked into my bedroom with nothing but a towel on and flipped on the radio. I walked over to my dresser and pulled out a pair of light blue scrubs. With the soft classical music playing in the backroom I got dressed in my scrubs. My parents had always wanted me to go into politics or become a lawyer but there was something from a young age that drew me to medicine.
After eating a bowl of cereal while reading one of my medical textbooks I looked down at my watch and realized that I need to get going or I would be late for my shift. I rushed out my front door and onto the now busy street. I slipped on my sunglasses and my sweater, even though it was a sunny day there was bit of a fall nip in the air.
As I walked the same route I always did through the back streets of Beacon Hill I saw the old blue bloods, and young professionals coming out of their apartments in a hurry eager to start the day. I could see why people wanted to live there, it was a beautiful section of Boston. I truly loved living in Boston, it had an old soul. Even though it was an American city it had more of the feel of an older European city. The way the streets twisted and turned around the old houses made it feel different from most of the other cities in America.
It was a nice easy walk from my apartment to the hospital. The walk to the hospital only takes about a 15 minutes at most from my apartment which is another reason why I loved living where I did. As I walked down the back side of Beacon Hill I saw the hospital looming in the distance, it was still early in the morning and the complex stood out on the Horizon.
Massachusetts General Hospital, my home for the next twelve hours, I was a cardiac surgeon. I split my time between Mass General Hospital, Boston Children's Hospital, and Harvard Medical School. After I had graduated from Harvard Medical School I decided to stay local. I mean why not, right? I loved the city and it had many of the best hospitals in the world; so ended up doing my residency at Mass General and then doing some work at Boston Children's. I shocked everyone in my class when I decided to focus on trauma surgery and pediatrics; when I was at Mass General I usually worked in the Emergency Department as I had no desire to have my own practice; most of my classmates had their own practices or where partners in practices but I decided that wasn’t for me.
Today was the last of my week in the Emergency Department, I usually worked four 12 hour days. While most doctors I work with did not like to work this shift I actually enjoy it, it lets me help the people who need it most. As I entered the front doors of the hospital I walked through the crowded lobby to the nurse's station. I waved to Carole, the head nurse; she was a very kind, older women and said, "I am going to drop this stuff in the locker room and I will be right back out."
"Sounds good Doc, it has been a quite morning so far, but who knows how long that is going to last. Hopefully people won't be doing anything stupid today, but I wouldn’t stake any money on that."
I smiled, Carole had been in the medical field for a long time, so she developed a brash attitude however she still cared more than most people about the patients that she was in charge of. I could only hope that I could be like her when I had thirty years in the medical profession.
I walked into the locker room and dropped off my bag in my locker, put on my sneakers and tied my hair up into a high ponytail. Then, I walked back out into the waiting area and to the nurses station, just as I was about to say something to Carole when I saw that she had gotten a call.
When she hung up the phone she said, "Well, my kid just got into trouble at school again. I don't know what I am going to do with that boy."
I smiled and said, "That is why I don't have kids they are too much trouble."
She looked at me and said, "I don't know, he might a pain sometimes but I would not trade having him for anything; it is my family which makes working here bearable now. I was like you once, so into my job I only wanted to help people and did not like about my own happiness. I promise you that you will meet someone nice, funny, and kind. When you do I hope that you will grab that opportunity with both hands and not let it go."
"You sound like a mother Carole."
"That is because I am Doc. And I think of all of you doctors as my children, take you for example Doc you have been working here for the past several years and I have never once seen you go out with someone or do anything outside of the hospital. I worry about you."
I smiled, I knew that she just wanted what was best for me. "Thanks Carole, but really I am fine. Do we have any patients?"
She went through the papers and charts, "Yeah, we have a couple of broken bones, some minor cuts that need stitches nothing major."
"Okay, give me the first one and let's get started."
She handed me a chart, and I walked out to the waiting room. I pushed the doors open and said, "Robert?"
The next several hours dragged on, Carole was right it was a pretty slow day. But, little did I know that was all about to change; and both my day and my life was about to thrown into chaos. I had just finished up setting the broken arm of a college student who had broken it skateboarding.
I walked back to the nurse's station and handed Carole the boy's chart. "I can't believe that boy got into MIT he is such an idiot."
Carole just laughed, "Well, do you think we should let them know that one of their students broke their arm because they thought that they could defy gravity?"
I laughed, "No, but…
I was not even able to finish my sentence before I heard an ambulance pull in and the doors to the emergency room burst open; several EMTs where pushing two stretchers. One with a young girl and one with a woman that had to be about thirty years old. “We have two gunshot victims, one is losing a lot of blood.” Little did I know at the time, this would be the moment that changed the course of my life forever.