Chapter Text
"You okay?"
"What?" Helena's voice pulls me out of my thoughts, and I look at her, forcing a smile. "Oh, yeah. All good."
She eyes me intently and frowns. "You seem very distracted today."
"Sorry about that," I murmur. I know she didn't mean it as criticism, but for some reason, I have the urge to apologize.
She still gives me that piercing look, as if she's trying to peer right into my brain. Unable to hold her gaze any longer, I stare at my hands.
"Sofiya, talk to me," she pleads gently, tugging a loose strand of hair behind my ear.
When she strokes my cheek, I lean into her touch. Helena is so much softer with me since Olympus, almost affectionate sometimes. I think she's deliberately trying to make an effort. Or maybe this whole thing got to her too, in some way, and she's longing for comfort herself. Either way, I savor every second of it, because this is what I've been missing all those years. It's the only reason I actually start to talk now, because usually I wouldn't bother her with this stuff - feelings, and all that.
"It just... hit me earlier," I concede quietly, still staring at my hands. "That we're never going to go back. Back home."
Because in order to resurrect me from the dead, the love of my life burned all bridges and made herself an enemy of the whole Terran Empire. Which, as a sentence, sounds utterly ridiculous, and I still haven't gotten used to it.
"No. We won't," Helena confirms. Hearing her say it actually makes it more real, and I can feel a lump forming in my throat. "Hey, come here." She pulls me into her arms, and I focus on her closeness for a few seconds to ground myself. "Didn't think you cared so much about that place," she admits, stroking my back.
'That place'. How casually she says it. Earth.
"You don't miss it at all? You're not even a little homesick?"
Helena considers the question for a few moments, wrapping me up in her arms tightly. "I don't think I ever really called a place 'home', and meant it."
"Huh."
On one hand - wow. On the other hand - maybe it's not that surprising. She's the most independent, self-sufficient person I have ever met. Of course she would never attach herself to something as mundane as a place. It's kind of admirable, actually. I should try that sometime.
We're both quiet for a bit, lost in our own thoughts. I don't want to miss it. I just can't help it.
"I'm sorry that we can't go back. But we'll find somewhere new," she then states, and gently lifts my chin so I look at her. "We'll make a new home. Together."
I can feel myself welling up, and I blink a few times, desperately trying not to cry. The thing about being with someone who almost never expresses their affection is, in those rare times where she does, it really, really hits. This is probably the most romantic thing Helena has ever said to me, and I'm not sure how to handle it.
I press a kiss on her lips and nuzzle my face into hers for a few moments, eyes closed, and I can feel myself calming down slowly. Her words keep replaying in my head. Together.
Maybe she's my home, actually.