Chapter Text
Jackson Wang was never particularly fond of playing mind games. For the majority of his life, he typically considered himself an honest and straightforward guy—and he had proof to back it up. Whenever he had feelings for someone, Jackson had always been the first to confess his interest the very moment he began to feel that little ‘spark’. Beating around the bush seemed like a waste of time and energy to him, not that energy was something the boy was ever short of.
When it came to Mark, however, Jackson was anything but straightforward. When it came to Mark, Jackson had absolutely no intention of confessing. He valued their friendship more than anything, and he believed ruining it would be an absolute pain in the ass. After all, who in their right mind would be stupid enough to fall in love with a member of their own group, let alone their own roommate?
When Jackson met Mark for the first time, he instantly became enraptured by the boy’s soft features and slender figure. Jackson wasn’t too concerned and he hadn’t spared it much thought, since the attraction had been purely shallow up until the two became roommates during their pre-debut period. With all the late night heart-to-hearts, the playful teasing, and his adorably high-pitched laughs, Mark made it impossible for Jackson not to fall in love with him. Not that Jackson would ever let him find out, of course. Despite seeming quite candid on the surface, he was the unequaled master of camouflaging his emotions—to the extent that none of his members had even suspected Jackson’s seemingly one-sided romance.
The only person who managed to find out about them, however, was none other than GOT7’s seemingly innocent BamBam. BamBam had always been perceptive in regards to other peoples’ feelings, despite his naïve demeanor and disarming appearance, and those of his best friend Jackson were no exception.
“Jackson-hyung. Jackson-hyung,” a small voice whispered in the darkness of his room. “I’m coming in.”
Jackson opened his eyes as the younger boy clambered over him in an attempt to reach the inner side of the bunk. Since Jackson preferred having someone to sleep next to and BamBam wanted to seek refuge from Yugyeom’s lawnmower-esque snoring, they decided that the current solution would suffice. Although he’d much rather have Mark be the one lying beside him, Jackson didn’t bother complaining.
“Ne, Jackson-hyung.” BamBam paused for a second as he heard the sound of quiet snores drifting from the top bunk. “When are you going to confess to Mark-hyung?” he asked, flopping his head into his pillow.
“Neeever!” Jackson whispered back loudly in English, his sudden reply startling the younger boy. He peeped his head out and glanced nervously at the upper bunk, then went back to speaking Korean. “It’s just…never gonna happen, okay?”
Definitely, Jackson thought. Never in a million years.
“I know it’s going to be okay,” the younger boy responded, shuffling under the blankets. “I’m a people person,” BamBam said in English, assuredly.
Jackson’s brows furrowed and his eyes widened. “Hey, hey, hey. Look, I’m the people person,” he said, pointing a finger to his own chest. “And what does that have to do with anything??”
BamBam rolled his eyes, not that Jackson could see him in the dark anyway, and turned his body to face the wall. He stayed that way for a few minutes until the sleepy-soft tone of his voice suddenly broke the silence.
“Jackson-hyung is the bravest person I know. All I’m saying is that if you don’t do anything, you’re gonna regret it.”
BamBam, being younger and more naïve than he was, would probably be the last person on Earth who Jackson (or anyone, for that matter) would ever take advice from. Despite all this, Jackson knew the boy was right.
-
The next day, Jackson yawned as he pulled his tank top off and over his head while getting ready for the broadcast that afternoon. He and Mark had been scheduled to appear on After School Club’s weekly episode for the first time in months. How many months has it been exactly? Jackson wondered, pulling out shirt after shirt from the pile of clean clothes on his bed. He was too tired to count.
His ears perked up at the sound of familiar footsteps approaching his room. As he looked up, his eyes met Mark’s gaze, which quickly dropped to Jackson’s naked torso and back down to the floor.
“Aren’t you gonna get ready?” Jackson asked in English, feeling unusually embarrassed for being exposed. It’s fine. We're roommates. He always sees me like this. Gotta keep cool. Gotta stay swag.
His roommate glanced to the messy pile of black clothing on Jackson’s bunk. “Can I borrow something? I don’t have anything to wear,” Mark murmured in Korean, rubbing the back of his neck. “Jinyoung took my last clean shirt.”
Damn Junior, Jackson thought for the sixth time that week. And it was only Monday. “Yeah, just take anything. And stop talking in Korean. We’re going on ASC, remember?”
“Yeah,” Mark said, glancing at Jackson again as he went to pick a light-coloured tank from the pile of black. He smirked as he tossed the only other white shirt at Jackson, finally speaking in English while heading for the door. “Put a shirt on.”
Immediately after Mark left, Jackson felt his entire face burning. He’s too cool. Covering his face with the shirt Mark had thrown at him, Jackson flopped face first onto his bed. He peeked at the fabric and sighed.
“Looks like I’m wearing white today.”
-
As usual, Jackson buzzed with happiness after shooting the first Markson Show episode of the year. He and Mark sat side by side in the midsection of their manager’s van after having finished dinner with Jimin and Eric.
Although Mark had his headphones in while he stared at the raindrops scattered across the car window, Jackson could hear the smooth beat of R&B music coming through the earpiece. He preferred actually talking to Mark, but sitting in comfortable silence with him wasn’t bad, either. Jackson was just relieved that nothing had changed between them. Even though the two of them had drifted a bit prior to GOT7’s Japan tour, their relationship since then had begun to return to the way it had been before.
Unexpectedly, Mark turned his head to face Jackson, smiling fondly at him and holding his gaze as he nudged him playfully in the arm. Jackson smiled back, but he still wasn’t used to it. He just kept getting more and more flustered each time.
Stop looking at me like that, Jackson wanted to tell him. Why are you looking at me like that?
If you keep looking at me like that, I’ll wanna kiss you.
Mark looked away quickly when their manager joked about how the smell of Korean barbeque on their clothes was making him hungry. Jackson laughed and suggested they go for another round, watching as Mark rested his chin in his palm and went back to watching the rain.
Did Mark, by any chance, hear what he said during ASC? Did he accidentally say it too loudly? No, I couldn’t have, Jackson thought. He made sure he hadn’t.
-
“Before we end for today, let’s answer one more question from someone else. 'What's one thing you'd like to tell the other?'" Eric Nam read loudly from ASC’s Twitter feed.
Without missing a beat, Mark smiled at his friend. “I want him to take care of himself. He’s always going on all these different shows and he never takes a break,” he said matter-of-factly, while gesturing his thumb at Jackson. He turned to face him. “You gotta take it easy. Look after yourself first,” he said, placing a hand on Jackson’s shoulder.
Eric smiled at the boy before returning to his stack of cue cards. “Very good. Well, that concludes this week’s show. Okay guys, let’s say goodbye to all our viewers.”
“Hey!” Jackson yelled, jumping out of his seat once the others began waving goodbye to the cameras. “You missed my turn!”
“Oh, did we?” Jimin teased, feigning surprise. “Okay then, Jackson. Go ahead. What’s something you’d like to tell Mark?” She clasped her hands together, smiling and watching him attentively.
Thirty seconds of silence, which consisted of the other three anticipating Jackson’s answer while focusing all their attention to the boy as he stared back wordlessly, passed before the entire room erupted into a fit of laughter.
Mark rested his head against his friend’s shoulder and let out a warm laugh, which reminded Jackson for the hundredth time why he was so, so undeniably in love with him. Jimin's voice replayed in his mind. What’s something you’d like to tell Mark? After Mark turned away when their eyes met, for the hundredth time, Jackson couldn’t help but let the words slip out.
“I love you, Mark."
His noiseless words were drowned out by a sea of chatter from the two hosts, and for the first time, Jackson was disappointed that they were.
In a way, Jackson had already confessed to him a thousand times. From their duet stage in Taiwan the previous year to all the moments he had kissed Mark playfully on the cheek—Jackson had meant it all. Even though he often said things in a playful manner, Jackson always meant every sentence that came out of his mouth.
Including this one.