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The wind whistled in Gi-hun’s ears as he sat on the edge of the roof of where he’d parked his car, the one full of the equipment he was using to keep track of, well, everything, really.
It was one of those days where Gi-hun wondered why he was even still trying. He felt useless. Nothing had shown up as of late regarding signs of that wretched recruiter, nothing seemed too out of place in the areas he sent his crew to check.
It was almost humiliating.
He was trying so hard, for what?
Though, really, that was a numb thought process of his, tucked into the back of his mind while other thoughts spun in the forefront.
The ground beneath him, for one, looked very inviting. He knew how dangerous those thoughts were, but he couldn’t just usher them away. They haunted him like the ghosts of those he failed to save.
Part of Gi-hun truly wondered how it would feel to hit the ground, feeling his skull fracture under the pressure, feeling the blood gushing from those unfortunate spots he may happen to break skin in.
The oblivion sounded nice. Grounding, even. It was becoming harder to feel real these days. Perhaps the feeling of his blood, sticky, hot and crimson, flowing out of his body would help.
He knew he shouldn’t.
This height probably wasn’t enough to kill anyway.
Perhaps if Gi-hun wasn’t here, and instead back at the motel he’d find a more convenient way to be doing this. Maybe he’d just smoke a ton of cigarettes. Maybe he’d try to find a knife. But he had to make due with what he had.
But nonetheless, he felt like he was on autopilot as he stood up, his feet dangerously hanging off the edge of the building slightly.
He felt bad, for not leaving some sort of message, for not even trying to pull himself back. But nothing really mattered to him anymore.
It’s not like anyone would mourn him if he did die.
Why would they?
He was a failure of a human being.
A failure in any way you could use that word.
He couldn’t even be there with his own daughter when he said he would be.
He wasn’t even there with his mother when she died.
She probably thought he abandoned her. The idea of that still stung freshly, even now.
Maybe that was why he didn’t hesitate much longer, stepping off the roof as easily as one might take a step to go down stairs.
And the feeling was… almost calming. He fell at a fast pace, yet everything felt so slow.
His lungs burned as he took in sharp gasps of air. It almost felt like the air was stabbing his lungs, and yet he didn’t mind.
It was freeing. To be falling like this, gasping sharply for crisp air. It was as if this was where he belonged.
Maybe if he did manage to die from this fall, he would get to see everyone he knew again. He’d get to apologize maybe. Perhaps he’d feel like less of a failure after that.
Gi-hun didn’t manage to think much before he actually hit the ground.
The pain was agonizing. Sharp, slowly spreading through his entire body like an illness.
His blood pooled under him at an alarming speed, well, to anyone outside of him, maybe.
His brain felt very scrambled too, his vision blurred slightly from the impact of hitting the ground.
But he didn’t pass out. No, he stayed conscious through the pain, and despite himself, he found he almost enjoyed it.
The sharp aching in his bones, the stinging in his worst injuries. It all made him feel human.
Though, his consciousness was fastly starting to fade. He was so out of it he didn’t notice the sound of someone running to him. He didn’t hear the frantic sound of the person’s voice as they called someone.
He just faded out of his existence like a flame going out on a candle.
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Gi-hun awoke in a haze. Confusion and a dull pain hit him, a throbbing headache coming with it not soon after.
He groaned and attempted to sit up, before being stopped by someone’s hand.
“Don’t sit up, you’re going to hurt yourself.” The person, a man? One who sounded very familiar at that, spoke up.
Gi-hun let out a quiet sound of defiance before flopping back down, suddenly feeling too lightheaded to stay up.
He took a moment to observe the area around him. A hospital room, clearly. That was where he was. He had a couple IVs hooked to himself, and a heartrate monitor.
He also noticed that some of his body was put into bandages, and one of his legs had been put into a cast. His head must have also been bandaged, because he could feel them there too.
He then brought his gaze to the person next to him. A man, for sure, he could tell. One closer to his age, likely. This must be the person who saved him.
“…why..?” Gi-hun rasped out after a moment, his voice rough and shaky.
The mysterious man didn’t respond for a moment. He almost seemed to be contemplating what the exact right thing to say might be.
“…because, you’re too important to just let go, Seong Gi-hun.” The man finally responded, the use of Gi-hun’s name felt very.. personal. He didn’t even know who this man was and yet this man seemed to know him better than most people he talked to nowadays.
Gi-hun could not bring himself to say anything back, though, his vocal cords felt too raw. Everything was too much for him right now.
“..I’ll go alert the doctors that you’re awake.” The man spoke once more after a moment, and then he was gone. Presumably off to do what he said he would.
Gi-hun just waited. Not like he could do much else.
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The doctors had eventually come into the room, the strange man had apparently left soon after letting them know he was awake.
The doctors told him that thankfully his injuries weren’t too bad, he supposed the building wasn’t tall enough to leave bad damage after all.
Though, they had also said that he would need to stay in the hospital for at least five days. They needed to monitor his condition and make sure everything would be totally okay.
He was also told once he was let out he would need crutches for a while, his leg was broken, and it would need to stay in a cast to heal.
After the doctors left, Gi-hun had fallen asleep quickly.
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In the following few days, Gi-hun had seen that mysterious man some more times.
The man seemed to like being in Gi-hun’s presence a lot for whatever reason. And yet, Gi-hun had never learned his name.
The man was very secretive. Though he did listen to Gi-hun talk when he felt he could. It.. helped Gi-hun feel almost human again.
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On the day Gi-hun had finally been told he could leave, he was given his needed crutches, and told that he wouldn’t have to worry about paying for the expenses of anything. Apparently the mystery man had already paid for it.
While on his way to the exit of the hospital, Gi-hun had spotted the strange man, and called for him to stop, thankfully, he did.
“Wait I.. wanted to thank you for.. well, a lot of things.” Gi-hun said, offering the man a slight smile. “So, thank you…”
He trailed off, realizing once more he did not know the man’s name.
“Oh Young-il. But you can just call me Young-il.” The man, Young-il, hums, handing Gi-hun some sort of note. “If you want to thank me, just text me. Maybe we could go out for soju sometime.”
With that, Young-il had walked off, leaving Gi-hun to wonder what just happened.
Perhaps this would be good for him, to have a new person in his life.
Only time could tell where this would bring him.