Chapter Text
Sanghyeok hadn’t even realised that he was on the verge of falling asleep until there’s suddenly a ruckus coming from the hallway to his left, which is coming closer by the second. He’d just come back from an individual schedule, too tired to even make a few more steps to go to his own room. Why should he when the couch is just right there?
“Oh hyung, you’re back!”
He hums sleepily, not bothering to open his eyes. A moment later, he feels a weight on the couch next to him, followed by a couple gentle pats on his knee. He’s thankful that it seems that that’s as far as the interaction Minseok is expecting from him.
But apparently not from whoever is with him, cause as loud as he can be, Minseok doesn’t usually make so much noise on his own, unless he’s streaming or in a game and Sanghyeok definitely didn’t imagine the commotion earlier.
“Have you made the order, hyung? I want to try their new smoothie flavour, it looks good.”
Sanghyeok hears a heavy sigh coming from the other couch, “Okay, I’m doing it now.”
Ah, Hyeonjoon must have lost another bet. Kids these days, he thinks.
“Do you want the same thing?”
The question takes Sanghyeok off guard. It can’t be directed towards him, surely. Firstly, it was asked in a too casual manner, uncharacteristic of Hyeonjoon when speaking to him. Secondly, he should be aware by now that Sanghyeok will likely reject the offer as he doesn’t usually drink smoothie, especially this late.
Before he can figure out an answer, an unexpected third but familiar voice chimes in, “Yes, I want to try it too.”
Sanghyeok opens his eyes instantaneously, freezing when he finds himself suddenly making eye contact with Jihoon, who to his credit does not react negatively. He beams wider instead, “Do you want one too, hyung?”
“Don’t bother. Hyung doesn’t drink something like that,” Minseok quips.
“Yah, I’m the one paying why are you the one offering?” Hyeonjoon admonishes Jihoon simultaneously, though he turns to look at Sanghyeok sheepishly, “But if you do want something hyung, of course I’ll treat you too.”
Sanghyeok smiles, drowsiness slipping away ever so slightly by the scene in front of him, “None for me, thanks for the offer.”
He focuses his gaze back on Jihoon, who seems to be muttering something under his breath about willingly pay for him anyway. He’s still standing somewhat in the middle of the living room, despite there being plenty of space on the couch next to Hyeonjoon and enough on Minseok’s other side.
“Let me quickly ask Hyeonjunnie and Minhyung first if they’d like something too. Wouldn’t want a sulky jungler in practice tomorrow.”
As they watch Hyeonjoon disappear in the direction of the bedrooms, Minseok too abruptly stands up, “I just remembered that I need to pee. Be right back, hyung!”
Sanghyeok and Jihoon look at each other, smiling slightly. Jihoon too is likely wondering which of them is the hyung Minseok is referring to.
Not that it matters much, Sanghyeok thinks. What does matter is what is he going to do now that he’s all alone with Jihoon for the next few seconds? Minutes perhaps! Sanghyeok finds himself suddenly feeling very awake.
“Sit down Jihoon-ah, make yourself comfortable.” That’s a not so bad first step if he says so himself.
What he absolutely did not expect however and which is now making his heart beat erratically, is for Jihoon to claim the spot Minseok had just vacated, right next to him.
“Were you filming a content, hyung? Or an advert?”
It takes him an embarrassing few seconds for Jihoon’s question to sink in, feeling heat rush to the back of his neck from the attention he’s receiving, “Uh yeah. I mean, no. I was filming a music video for an idol’s comeback.”
Jihoon’s face immediately lights up in excitement, his body turned fully now to face Sanghyeok, “Oh wow that’s so cool! Which idol, hyung?”
Sanghyeok's mind goes blank momentarily, faced with the brightness of Jihoon’s sharp eyes and his infectious grin, “Uh Stray Kids?”
It says something about his trust and faith in Jihoon that he easily discloses the still confidential information without needing to explicitly tell him to keep it a secret for now. His hesitance is more because he’s not sure if he got the name right.
“Oh. That’s the same guy you had that UNICEF photoshoot with a while back right?” Jihoon asks, the giddiness from earlier has somehow disappeared from his voice.
Sanghyeok’s torn between feeling concerned by the abrupt change in the other’s behaviour and feeling flattered that Jihoon pays him enough mind to be aware of and even remember that particular photoshoot, which he himself to be honest had almost forgotten about and ooh, no wonder one of the guys had vaguely looked familiar in the greeting video he was shown earlier!
“Ah yeah I guess he is. But I didn’t film with them or anything. It’s just going to be a small featuring.”
The smile quickly returns on Jihoon’s face funnily enough but before Sanghyeok can elaborate more on his day, both Minseok and Hyeonjoon returns, the latter with Hyeonjun trailing behind.
“Oh, you’re back!” greets the maknae, squeezing himself next to Hyeonjoon on the other not-too-small couch. Minseok has no trouble occupying the space next to Jihoon who Sanghyeok is only just realising is sitting a tad close to him.
“Yeah, I arrived not too long ago,” he replies, belatedly feeling conscious now that he’s the only who’s still in his outdoor clothes, albeit it being the usual T1 uniform and with make-up still on, while the rest of them are in their casual, comfortable and worn t-shirts and sweatpants, “I’ll go shower now actually and call it a day. Enjoy your smoothies.”
“So soon?”
Sanghyeok’s not sure if he’s imagining the sadness in Jihoon’s voice and it almost makes him stop in his track and turn back around but then nah, it can’t be. He must be really tired for his mind to conjure such fantasy. He looks back at Jihoon regardless, gives him the excuse of feeling very tired and a small parting smile.
So, the thing is, Sanghyeok believes he’s a very sensible person. He knows what’s attainable and what’s far out of his reach. He’s sure he’ll still be able to play well and have a fairly enjoyable time whilst he’s at it so he doesn’t think twice about re-signing for another 4 years with T1. He knows he likely can hold his breath underwater for longer than 45 seconds if he practices enough. He hasn’t been able to currently but it’s possible, he knows it. And he knows for certain that even if he goes to Haidilao to eat every night for one whole week, he still won’t be sick of it. That’s just how sure he is.
Now, what’s not possible and absolutely unimaginable is for Jihoon to ever like him back. That’s just a fact. He recognised this immediately after it dawned on him that the fondness and adoration he has for Jihoon isn’t the same as what he feels for his teammates and friends.
That was during Asian Games. It’s been many months now and Sanghyeok is still very much convinced of the impossible-ness.
Jihoon, a shining star, who is relatively much younger, has so much ahead of him. He’s massively talented and very passionate - Sanghyeok bears witness to this each time they meet on and off the rift. Not to mention, he’s incredibly attractive with his tall and lean physique and dare he say it, Sanghyeok even thinks Jihoon may be the handsomest player in the LCK.
And Sanghyeok? All he has to brag about is his name. Faker. One can argue about his accolades and whatnot but Jihoon isn’t an organisation looking to sign him on, is he? Sanghyeok also has enough sense to not deem all the trophies he’s won necessarily boyfriend material either.
Honestly, he’s just waiting for the moment either Minseok or Hyeonjoon lets it slip that Jihoon is dating someone. Perhaps then, he can finally be successful in getting rid of his feelings for Jihoon. It will definitely hurt when the time comes, that’s for sure but it’s something he thinks he is prepared for. Can’t be worse than losing Worlds finals can it?