Chapter Text
"Why is this happening to me?" You mutter to yourself, trying to remain calm but your loud gasps and pounding heart could be heard from miles away.
"It's okay..." Steve Rogers is trying to calm you down. You nod silently, but you're freaking out, and the terrifying truth takes your breath away: the Winter Soldier himself is chasing you, and nothing can stop him from assassinating you. You aren’t safe anywhere, not even with Captain America on your side, protecting you.
"Perimeters checked and safe, I don't see any sign of him," says Agent Natasha Romanoff as she’s joining you. She lays her eyes on you for a short time, you catch a glimpse of sympathy in them, but you don't have time for bonding, you're shaking so much that you are barely able to stay present and not pass out.
"Why is he after you anyway?" Natasha's words shake you to your core, you can't even think you're so scared. Your lips are trembling but you manage to phrase your say slowly.
"I— I don't know..." you stutter.
An unexpected noise echoes around in the desolated building you're hiding at, you nearly jump up and scream, the stress unbearable. But seconds pass and you're still alive, at least you feel so, so you soothe yourself—it must be just some noise in the dark night.
"We know that you're with HYDRA," states Captain Rogers firmly.
Salty sweat drops down on your forehead, you swallow before saying "I am—I was their little puppet, tangled in strings but things have changed after the Hellicarrier incident at the Triskelion. I thought I could be free, but I was wrong. You just can't quit working for HYDRA."
"You're wrong," interrupts Natasha. "You've got everything in the world to be who you want to be. The question is who you want to be."
"Why are you helping me anyway?"
You're not an idiot though, you can sense that it's not just because they swore to protect people, your gut says it's about something more, even though none of them say a thing. You're eager to know, but you're just too damn exhausted. Your eyelids feel heavy, you're scared and your mind is dizzy, and you soon fall asleep…
"...wake up... Wake up, NOW!"
You're being dragged out of your sweet dream, at first you don't even remember where you are. Steve's hovering over you—apparently trying to wake you up and he looks a little anxious—and you soon awake fully, the fear in your stomach is re-growing. The sweet shelter coming from your mind having been on standby mode while asleep slowly fades, and you’re back in the real world, back to being haunted and your life turning upside down, but you can't have a mental breakdown just yet.
"Get up, we're on the move," the Captain says.
He helps you to stand up, you're on your feet in seconds, with your motions puzzled and unsure, so you just frown all confused.
"Whh—why? Where are we going?"
You don't get answers and you're starting to have enough and reach your breaking point. You gather your courage and strength to resist.
"If you want me dead, just shoot me already! I have enough of people making such fuss about this!" You raise your voice, feeling more and more confident by each word you phrase. You're really on the edge of your tolerance. You may be a traitor to SHIELD in a way, but you won't stand anyone dragging you around like a stupid doll anymore.
Steve’s gazing at you, he’s rather astonished seeing you throwing a tantrum. You expect him to put you in your place or something—given that you are just an enemy from his point of view, not knowing the whole truth about you—but then he surprises you when his face softens. He lets out a deep sigh, then starts talking to you. He still seems very serious but much kinder.
"I won't let you die, I promise." He pauses a little, which makes you suspicious but you believe him. "We just have to keep going."
You realise he's not so expert at lying, but you still nod. You trust your instincts, you know there's more here that meets the eye, but you know Steve wasn't lying when he said he'd protect you, and it's enough for you for now.
Hours have passed as you are on your way you have no actual idea where, but you don't even care anymore. The sun is shining bright and warm above your head, the three of you are now walking in a park filled with families enjoying the lovely weather.
You nearly forget about any danger that may be around, you don't even have second thoughts about why you're strolling in a park when you should be hiding away from the public where you could be tracked down so easily…
But who cares if an assassin is after your blood, anyway? You just enjoy the sunshine, your face held up to the sky, eyes closed. You feel so relaxed and happy—it's like a dream.
Then you hear a high-pitched scream, and your world shakes again.
People around you start running, screaming all along. You don't understand what's going on, you don't see anything besides civilians running up and down. Turning your head around you have to come to the conclusion that Steve and Natasha are out of your sight, they’re not with you anymore.
"What happened? They were right behind me moments ago..."
You're panicking now, fear trails down your spine as you begin to question yourself: was that really a moment ago, or did you just space out?
Something's very wrong, you can feel it but you still hope it's just some kind of stupid joke. You look around, searching for Steve and Natasha, and you notice him.
Time slows as you spot the Winter Soldier heading in your direction, he holds a gun in his hands. You can't move, you freeze completely. He lifts his gun up, pointing straight at you—his moves are so mesmerizing, somehow you just can't get your eyes off him even when he's targeting you. You realise you're not afraid though, you welcome your end but you close your eyes because you don't wish to see how he's firing at you.
You hear the gunshot, but you don't feel any pain, and that makes you wonder, but in the next moment you're pushed to the ground violently.
"Run! We hold him off!" Natasha gets up on her feet soon and runs toward the Winter Soldier who you see now is fighting with Steve. But thinking about that, the Captain rather looks like only defending himself than actually attacking the assassin, and he’s even talking to him, but neither you can hear what he’s saying, nor you care—you’re trying to survive here.
Still, millions of questions rush through your mind vividly, but your desire for survival is stronger, so you get up on your feet and start to run—you run for your life.
You cannot hear properly what's happening around you, your ears are ringing. Adrenaline fills your body and you feel a little stronger.
You're running for a while and you don't hear anything from the fight anymore, so you stop to look back. You're gasping for air when you turn around, confused that you don't see anything again, like you just imagined the whole thing; you don't see Steve or Natasha. Even the Winter Soldier seems gone.
You realise this is your chance finally, you just have to keep running if you want to break free. You turn around quickly and you spot a car left there with open doors which you certainly could use to get away with, so you run toward it.
Before you could get any closer to the vehicle, the assassin gets ahead of you in a blink of an eye—he appears from nowhere and he lands at the top of the car you wanted to escape with. You nearly fall because of the abrupt slowdown you have to do, the Winter Soldier is so close it catches your breath.
"This is it. I'm dead," you think to yourself but you can't give up so easily—the adrenaline in your veins keeps you all pumped so you start to run in a different direction.
Looking back to check the assassin behind you, you lose sight of him—again—but you don't decelerate, just keep on running forward, still looking back and not in front of you.
You're fool enough to think you’ve really lost the assassin, but when you turn your neck to look ahead again, you spot him. He's right before you now, and you just keep going in his direction because he's too fast and you can't move around that quick. Also, your brain fails to send signals to your legs to slow down and change direction, it’s like you just cannot function anymore.
The Winter Soldier’s whole figure burns in your retina as you're getting closer and closer to him, unable to escape your fate, then the world fades to black as you run into him, you run into death.
You don't know where you are but you must be alive—at least the tight and rough fabric cutting into your skin is just too damn painful for you to be dead. Heaven isn't supposed to be like that, though maybe you've arrived in hell.
“Looks like I just don't deserve to rest in peace…” You think, but you open your eyes out of curiosity.
Hell doesn't seem like swirling flames all around, but the dim light in the room is still hurting your eyes. On top of that, you're starting to feel that you have a splitting headache, you'd raise one hand to touch where you think you have hit your head, but your hands are tied together and your body's limb, your moves dizzy. You realise though that you're lying on a bed as you sit up slowly. You start to look around, still confused, when you notice him .
The Winter Soldier is sitting in a chair not so far from you, but still far enough to keep his face in the shadows. He doesn't say a word, he's just looking at you with his light blue eyes that seem so old and worn, but his gaze is so intense that you start to shiver and have to look away.
You see a glass of water on the bedtable next to you, you're so thirsty it burns your throat but you just can't make a move.
You sense some distortion in the corner of your eye, and in the next minute the Winter Soldier is standing right next to your bed. You're paralysed, but you can't really decide if it's out of being utterly terrified or absolutely stunned that he's grabbing the glass of water, apparently with the intention of giving it to you.
“What the actual shit is going on here??!”
You just cannot figure out why he's done all this, and most of all: what is he gonna do to you and why did he kidnap you in the first place? You're not that valuable or something—you're just an ordinary and dull person who was at the wrong place at the wrong time, and got caught up in the middle of two intelligence agencies’ warfare.
“Maybe HYDRA is behind this, and it's just another sick game that they're playing to me,” your scattered thoughts rocket through your mind but you still accept the offered glass of water the assassin is holding for you to drink.
It's all weird and embarrassing, and you have to be careful with swallowing, ‘cause you just don't want the whole thing ending up in your lap—that would never happen though, since this cruel and heartless murderer is tilting the glass so gently that you are perfectly able to swallow in your own slow-paced rhythm. It's like he's done this several times… It's just so suspicious, but even if it's just a trap, your eyes are glued to the assassin’s, it's like you've been mesmerised and no matter how odd the whole situation is, you just can't stop looking into the shimmering steely blues of his eyes.
“Why?”
This one question echoes in your head as you watch the assassin gently placing the empty glass back on the bedtable. You've seen him in action—up close—you've seen how mercilessly he can kill people without hesitation, now you're completely astonished by how calm he appears to be.
“I won't hurt you.”
First you don't even realise it’s really him talking. You're so confused, especially because his voice sounds so—you can't find the proper words, but the sound of his voice has a nice ring, even if said voice is hardly audible, deep and hoarse.
You still have no idea about what he wants to do with you, especially how you could benefit him, but you just don't know what to ask and what to say, you're not sure if you could pronounce a word at all.
The Winter Soldier on the other hand appears to be in a quite chatty mood.
“You're working for HYDRA.” He states. You feel an instant disgust in your stomach—because you didn't ask for HYDRA, you didn't want to get involved with this, you're as much of a victim as anyone else getting harmed because of the evil organisation—but you don't say a word. Not that anyone would listen to your explanations anyway… People just want to blame someone, and if they can't get HYDRA, they're satisfied blaming you. You—a pawn in their crazy game.
“You help me with something, then you're free to go.”
The way the assassin looks into your eyes after he spoke just sends chills down your spine. You can't tell if there's any anger in those blue eyes, any despise toward you “being” HYDRA, but you still think this just has to be a joke.
Like, how the hell could you possibly help a super assassin against a bunch of creepy dudes, hungry for world domination?
You don't know, and you also can’t decide whether he was lying about setting you free, but your life just couldn't get any more screwed up, could it?
All you can do for now is nod your head silently, and try not to scream out loud as the Winter Soldier pulls a knife out of his pocket—only to untie your hands.
At least he takes your comfort into consideration, doesn't he?