Archive of Our Own ^beta

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“Char, do you ever feel like your memory skips over things?”

“What do you mean Nick?”

“I can remember moving to Willow Creek and into our house but before that it’s like my brain can’t quite remember.”

“Are you feeling okay? Let me feel your forehead… hmm you haven’t got a temperature.”

“Maybe I need a lie down.”

“What brought on this idea anyway?”

“Someone at work asked me how we met and I could recite it word for word.”

“I should hope so.”

“No what I mean is. Everything is like a story I tell myself not a memory.”

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“You’ve got to promise not to hate me!”

“I can make no such promise, tell me what’s wrong.”

“Just know I’m sorry. I was playing the sims for a bit when I remembered I need to fix my nails.”

“Why would I hate you for nail polish?”

“That’s not it, I um, clicked save without thinking or checking, my phone was ringing.”

“Please just tell me what the fuck went wrong when you were fucking giving yourself a fucking manicure!”

“I can’t get them to do anything.”

“Like the woohoo glitch? That amount of woohooing is normal.”

“No. Much worse.”

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“Nick this is off the wall, out of pocket, over the moon, crazy.”

“No, my sweet Charlie, this is our fate.”

“Nick, I am being so serious, you’re scaring me.”

“Charlie, do you trust me?”

“With my life.” 

“I can prove it, but we need to be smart, start small.”

“How?”

“Look for signs, glitches.”

“Like the matrix?”

“See that’s what I mean! We can reference that movie, I can tell you the plot, the actors but not when I saw it.”

“That’s normal right? Seeing a movie and not really remembering.”

“No, because no one has seen any movies.”

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“Maybe you left it running too long, it’s broken the save?”

“I’ve tried everything!”

“I sent a report to EA and Maxis for good measure but they were useless in helping with the woohoo glitch.”

“At least they seem to be okay.”

“Yeah, you’re right, they’re eating and doing all the needs.”

“They haven’t left the house.”

“Charlie’s still writing, or use motherlode.”

“We can figure this out, nothing bad will happen.”

“I think I’ve figured out why they haven’t left the house since you broke the game.”

“You have?”

“They can’t, see a plates in front of the door.” 

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“Do you see it?”

“I see it.”

“Charlie, if you pull my jumper anymore it’s gonna tear.”

“What do we do?”

“I don’t know.”

“Why are there always fucking plates blocking everything?”

“I remember we woohooed in a bush cos one was by the bed.”

“I still don’t know why I got up from the table and left it there.”

“Okay let’s just leave the door maybe it will go away by itself. Things do that sometimes, right?”

“Yeah all the time.”

“Rubbish, plates, dirty clothes…”

“It’s normal when things move too, right? My desk, your treadmill…”

“All completely normal…”

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“Just click and drag the plate to the bin.”

“I’ve tried! Do you think I’m stupid!?”

“Of course not!”

“Oh EA got back to me.”

“Go on.”

“They’ve suggested backing up the save to the cloud or on a hard drive and then try removing all custom content and reloading.”

“I’ve never played with custom content.”

“Really? It’s quite fun, you can download all these clothes and one time I found—”

“This is not the time! Help me figure out how to upload things to a fucking cloud or whatever.”

“I don’t think anyone truly understands the ways of clouds.”

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“Do you feel that?”

“Feel what?”

“That.”

“Nick, why are you whispering? What are you feeling?”

“It’s  a compulsion to get that stupid plate. I can feel my body wanting to move, like the decision has been taken away.”

“Is it kind of itchy?”

“YES!”

“I feel that all the time.”

“Me too, but never before this strongly. Charlie, how do I make it stop? Please make it go away.”

“It’s okay Nick, you’ll be okay. Give me your hand.”

“I’ve got to do it Charlie, I’m sorry I can’t control my decision.”

“It’s okay Nick, we’ll do it together.”

Chapter Text

“I must have clicked for Nick to pick up that plate a hundred times.”

“Maybe we should do what EA suggested.”

“I haven’t downloaded custom content it’s all strictly from expansion packs -“

“Wait Nicks going to the door.”

“We’ve got to train them. You know, get them to listen to us again.”

“Train them? That could work, might take some time.”

“Charlie’s following him everywhere now.”

“He’s moving slow but at least he’s got the damn plate.”

“Why does every sim insist on washing their plates in the bathroom sink? The kitchen sink is literally closer.”

“Something still feels off.”

Chapter Text

“Why don’t we go for a walk to clear our heads?”

“It’s dark out.”

“A stroll under the moonlight?”

“Okay that sounds romantic I’m in.”

“The fresh air is making me feel better already.”

“I like holding your hand while we walk. Why don’t we do that more?”

“…I don’t know, it’s never really occurred to me.”

“Like it’s felt impossible before.”

“Holding hands in the moonlight with my boyfriend.”

“I don’t want to go back.”

“Neither do I.”

“What are you doing?”

“Walking backwards so I can see your pretty face.”

“I’ve never thought about doing that.”

“Me neither.”

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“I’ve never seen sims do that before. You must have installed something.”

“I’m going to be your worst enemy if you keep accusing me of doing something I literally have zero clue how to do!”

“Alright, alright.”

“Maybe we should turn the game off for the night. It’s been a bit stressful.”

“You’re right.”

“Click for them to go home.”

“I have.”

“They really are out of control aren’t they.”

“Well they’re coming around the block it won’t take them long.”

“Thank god they’re back in the house.”

“Okay time for bed simsies.”

“At least the woohoo glitch still works.”

Chapter Text

“That was amazing.”

“I know.”

“This time was on another level.”

“I know usually it’s such a blur.”

“Yeah, and it’s over so fast.”

“Nick I can’t remember a single detail from any time we’ve woohooed.”

“…me neither.”

“I know we can be ridiculously insatiable.”

“I know it always feels good but -“

“All I remember is rolling around under the sheets-“

“And it’s all fuzzy? Like every detail is blocked from our minds?”

“Yeah! Thats just it! But I remember this time.”

“In vivid detail.”

“I hope every time we woohoo is like this.”

“Me too Char.”

“What was that?!”

Chapter Text

“AHHHH! My eyes! My innocent eyes!”

“Oh give over, your eyes are far from innocent.”

“I’ll never be the person I was before. Honestly that one’s on me for having eyes.”

“You’re being dramatic.”

“Are we the first people to witness one sim spanking the other?”

“He did not spank him.”

“I know what I saw.”

“This is the first time I’ve seen you this shocked by their woohoo antics. You’re usually all for this kind of thing.”

“All we’ve seen before is the blurry sheets and petals when they finish. I don’t need to see more from my babies.”

Chapter Text

“Maybe you farted?”

“I did not, my farts do not sound like that.”

“I know, but I thought it would lighten the mood. I’m a little scared.”

 “It got sooo dark.”

“I know. Wait there.”

“Where are you going? Nick?”

“To look out the window.”

“Don’t leave me!”

“Char, come look.”

“Everything’s stopped. It’s so dark.”

“That bird is mid flight.”

“How is that possible?”

“This is all connected, the woohoo thing, itchy compulsions, furniture moving, plates.”

“That guy who was in our pool and the ladder just vanished.”

“Char, we agreed, if anyone comes asking that never happened, right?”

Chapter Text

“A nice long sleep and then a healthy dose of sunshine will do us both some good. You’ll see.”

“It won’t help Nick and Charlie though.”

“Nick and Charlie will be fine.”

“How can you be sure?”

“Just go to bed.”

“No, tell me how can you be so sure?”

“Nick and Charlie are sims! They’ll be okay because they are pixels and code!”

“You know—”

“I know you think they’re these real beings and I know you think all these glitches mean something. But it just needs an update like every other fucking video game. Now shut up already!”

Chapter Text

“What should we do?”

“I don’t know, feels…wobbly though.”

“I don’t feel any itchy compulsions.”

“And I don’t feel my energy going down, my hunger creeping down, my bladder isn’t ticking.”

“I’m not sure if I like it yet.”

“Feels freeing to me.”

“Nick, this is our chance!”

“Char, love sorry if I’m being stupid, but our chance to do what?”

 “Explore what we can truly do. Find answers to our memories being wobbly. What do you say?”

“How?”

“We’ve never tried to leave Willow Creek.”

“It’s never felt possible, the itch, it made me want to stay here.”

Chapter Text

“What do you fancy for breakfast?”

“I don’t know, something quick.”

“We have the full day, I could make us something nice.”

“I’m not in the mood.”

“You just want to get back to your computer to play the fucking sims!”

“So what!? The games been all out of whack and I want to make sure things haven’t gotten worse.”

“Fine, but you’ve got to get this obsession under control and soon.”

“Whatever.”

“You don’t see how much this is affecting you, do you?”

“What do you want some big confession so you can get on with some bullshit intervention?”

Chapter Text

“Charlie, everywhere is the same. Darkness, stillness.”

“I think the whole of Willow Creek is like this.”

“Where should we go?”

“To the Goth’s.”

“The big house?”

“Yeah, they’re like the founding family of the town. They’ve got to know what’s going on around here.”

“I’ve never seen them around.”

“Sweetems, we don’t get out much. We get rather tied up with each other.”

“We don’t have any rope, but I could try some other way to tie you to the bed later.”

“Nick! Oh my god just drive.”

“You’re blushing, don't deny it, you wanna try it out.”

“Maybe…”

Chapter Text

“No no no!”

“It’s okay, calm down, what’s glitched?”

“I think the games broken beyond repair. Nick and Charlie they’re properly gone.”

“Check the bushes! And any other place you can woohoo.”

“No look, they’re not members of the Nelson Spring household anymore. Their house is still there the game hasn’t hidden it away.”

“You must have switched their household or moved them out.”

“I haven’t loaded the game since last night. I went to bed.”

“Maybe this is a sign to start a fresh.”

“This is you isn’t it?! This is your fault. You’ve hidden them from me somehow!”

Chapter Text

“I don’t think they’re home Char.”

“There’s got to be a way in.”

“Do you ever wonder how that robber got a whole bed out of our place?”

“Not the time for these deep ass questions Nick.”

“Fair enough, have you tried just opening the door?”

“Damn, that worked!”

“Remember, all those people have just wandered into our house before?”

“Yeah, it was pretty fucking rude of them.”

“Hello?!”

“It’s so quiet here.”

“Maybe they’re asleep.”

“But their fridge isn’t making a noise or their —”

“You hear that?”

“That song? Yeah I can hear it.”

“Where is it coming from?”

Chapter Text

“Do you think you’re some kind of hero? Trying to save me from a game?”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I know exactly what I’m talking about! It cannot be possible for this to happen by itself and you’re the only person other than me with access to my computer.”

“The game glitches all the time, the pixel world is an imperfect place.”

“You are not trying to paraphrase The breakfast club against me.”

“It’s true, there’s plenty of examples of the sims fucking up alone. Look at that baby on fire meme.”

“Please just fix your mess.”

Chapter Text

“I think it’s coming from the sky?”

“Me too, how is that possible?”

“I can hear voices.”

“Shhhh, what did they say?”

“Sul sul, ah van vesua, cummuns nala?”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“Don’t look at me, how would I know!”

“Fair enough, hello? My name’s Charlie, we just want to ask you some questions?”

“Uhhh, Char…”

“Yeah?”

“Why is she walking like that? Is her incense too strong and making her dizzy?”

“I see a lot of people walk like that.”

“Ma’am can we talk, do you speak English? Or maybe French?”

“Oh yay brilliant she’s dancing.”

Chapter Text

“Get yourself up, get over here and fix whatever it is you’ve done.”

“Or what?”

“Or this is over!”

“Are you serious? Are you seriously threatening that over an old video game.”

“That’s the problem with this isn’t it? You can’t see that this ‘old game’ means something to me.”

“Obviously I can see it ‘means’ something to you. It means too much to you!”

“What’s so wrong with that? What is so wrong with me having a coping mechanism.”

“You’re relying on it too much. It’s gone too far.”

“I’m not hurting anyone! Nick and Charlie give me joy.”

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“Char we should leave.”

“She’s got to be playing us, I’ve heard the Goths speak and I’ve always understood them.”

“We’re not going to get more than gibberish and some questionable dance moves from her.”

“You’re one to talk.”

“My two left feet aside, let's stop wasting our time.”

“I just want to look around, see if any weird shit is happening.”

“Looks normalish to me.”

“Their bookshelf is full but half the books are blank.”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s a physical book but no title or even pages and all the others are in the same gibberish language.”

Chapter Text

“Don’t you have any pride in yourself anymore?”

“You’re being mean.”

“No, listen to me. Since you made Nick and Charlie you’ve stopped your hobbies, you’ve called in sick to work multiple times, I have to pester you to eat and shower.”

“Whatever, I've gotten a little attached.”

“Your entire life is sims now, not just a little treat to unwind. You’ve said it’s your only source of happiness. How is that supposed to make me feel?”

“I could be out there doing way worse you know? Spending my free time on a computer isn’t harming anyone.”

“It’s harming us.”

Chapter Text

“Okay we can go now.”

“Thank you, come on.”

“Do you see that ghost too?”

“Yeah I see it.”

“We could try seeing if the ghost knows anything about all the strange things going on around here.”

“I dunno Char, talking to ghosts can lead to all kinds of trouble. I’ve always been scared of them.”

“You’re right, let's go back to the car.”

“D’you know what else is strange? I can’t recall a single journey in a car before today. Every time I’ve gone to work I’ve stepped outside the house and a few seconds later I’m just… there.”

Chapter Text

“Can you find it in your heart to tell me what you did to the game? Please?”

“Are you going to play any less?”

“I can’t promise that. But I can promise I’ll take more breaks.”

“Will you talk to someone again? A professional someone, I don’t want you to rely on the sims for all your happiness.”

“It’s not that bad.”

“There’s a line where it is that bad and I think we’ve reached it.”

“I’ll try.”

“That’s all I ask.”

“So where are they? What did you actually do to the game?”

“Move over, let me show you.”

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“I’ve been thinking about the first time you bought up weird things going on you know? This whole conspiracy that seems to be happening.”

“You think I’m right don’t you? We are in the matrix.”

“I don’t know about that, I don’t think either of us are the one or that Neo is out there saving the world.”

“What do you think Char?”

“I don’t think we’re… real…”

“But we’re here, literally here in a car right now outside our house.”

“Maybe real isn’t the right word. I think we’re in a simulation of some sort.”

“Really, like a game?”

Chapter Text

“They should be back.”

“Yeah they came back by themselves.”

“They think they did that.”

“So how did you do this?”

“EA was right I downloaded like a mega shit tone of custom content.”

“Was the woohoo glitch you?”

“Um no they really are just that horny.”

“So all the downloads must have been incompatible or some of them need patching?”

“I haven’t heard you giggle like that in a long time.”

“It’s just nice to know we don’t have to lose Nick and Charlie completely. I was worried for a while.”

“We’re all gonna be okay?”

“Yeah we are.”

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“If we aren’t real what should we do about it?”

“I mean, Char our lives are usually pretty okay.”

“I don’t like the itchy compulsions.”

“Me neither.  But they’re usually for good things. You know? Cook, pee, woohoo.”

“I never getting itchy for a woohoo that’s all just me wanting you hot stuff.”

“Chaaarrliee you’re making me blush.”

“I know, it’s a treat for me.”

“So, we keep our controller or whoever happy and we can stay together forever?”

“Yes, I mean that feels right to me, do you feel that too?”

“I do.”

“My love for you is real.”

Chapter Text

“Now all the downloads are gone they look..”

“Happy?”

“Yeah, maybe it was affecting them more than we realised?”

“It’s okay Nick and Charlie, we’ll look after you.”

“A healthy amount?”

“Yes that too. No more disasters.”

“Okay dinner time. I think a nice salad sounds good.”

“I don’t think we have any — oh you mean them. Yeah you feed them and I’ll feed us.”

“Right Nick time to whip up one of your signature salads.”

“Watching sims cook salads is always funny chopping up stuff and then stirring random slop on the stove.”

“Oh my god! Nick’s on fire!”

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“One salad coming right up Char.”

“Need any help?”

“No I got it, you just stand there and look pretty.”

“Done and done.”

“After this I think we should lie down together.”

“I thought that was a given. Why does your salad always turn into stuff in a pot that you cook?”

“I’ve never really thought about it. Always turns out okay.”

“Fuck Nick! Watch out you’re on fire!”

“What do I do?”

“Here let me just… shit water water. Hopefully our controller will help!”

“That was close.”

“They must be looking out for us.”

“Yeah, thanks whoever you are.”