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I Scraped My Knees On Jealousy

Summary:

Grian and Scar have a huge argument after Grian sneaks out to see BigB again.
...
TW (if you don't want to read the tags): Basic Double Life self-harm (powered snow), screaming argument, cheating.
oh yeah kinda scarian week day 2 and 3

Notes:

I know it's short but I wanted to write this today so... here it is, all 700-something words of it. Please give me any feedback (bad or good) that you have for me (I won't mind if it's a little mean)
Title from Mad Tsai "what a shame"

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Scar slammed the door behind his soulmate with a bang. His back hit the wood, and his knees gave out. Before he knew it, he was sobbing on the floor, pressed against the door like it would hold everything, all the betrayal and heartbreak, back. It didn’t. 

 

“Hey, hey, you don’t need to cry. He’s a cheating motherfucker who doesn’t deserve an ounce of your tears.” Pearl crouched down and cupped Scar’s face in her hand, angling his head so he was forced to look her in the eyes. 

 

“But- but- he’s my soulmate! Doesn’t that mean I should care about him?” Scar sniffled. Pearl glared at him, gaze hard and unyielding, but not in a cold way. 

 

“Do you think Scott cares about me? Do you think that, if even for a moment Grian thought about you and your feelings, he would be sneaking out and meeting his ‘lover? No, being a soulmate does not mean caring for the other, it means dying with them and feeling their pain.” 

 

“Then why doesn’t he feel this! Why doesn’t he feel the pain I do every time he picks BigB over me! Why,” Scar dropped his voice, “does he betray me at every turn and treat me like a burden whenever I try to help?”

 

“You know what I mean, Scar.” 

 

He sighed. “Yeah, I do. Doesn’t make him less of a traitor,” the dejected zookeeper muttered. “Traitor! Traitor Scar!” flitted through his head. He shook it off, trying to dismiss the memories of his past lives. “Did you bring the powered snow?” 

 

“Of course,” Pearl said, standing and ruffling his hair like a little brother. “Wouldn’t risk being seen around here otherwise.” That stung. Scar knew she didn’t mean it that way, but it still hurt to be referred to like a tool. “Ready to torture some traitors?”

 

“Yeah.” This time, Scar welcomed the numbness. Let the bastard suffer

————

Grian trudged back home, path lit by the gray light of dawn. Hopefully Scar was asleep by now. He didn’t want to face any uncomfortable questions about his empty hands and swollen lips. Sadly, luck was not on his side today.

 

“Where were you?” Scar asked the moment Grian slipped through the door. He cringed internally at the accusation in his soulmate’s tone, harsh and cold like snow on peaks high above the clouds. Dammit, why was he awake? Had he been… waiting up? Grian shoved that thought down before it could show on his face. 

 

“Why was I freezing cold in the middle of the night?” he snapped back, trying to get out before Scar picked up on any of the avian’s emotions. He was ready for the other to sit there, speechless, and for a quick but sassy exit after that. Again, today was not his day.

 

“Why did you get warmed up right after by another person? I know what a hug feels like. Oh, and would you care to explain why you look like you spend the night getting kissed senseless? At least grab some gunpowder on your way back to sell it,” Scar yelled back. Grian was stunned by the emotion fused into the words spewing from his soulmate’s mouth like poison.

 

“I- I don’t know what you mean. I was- I was just out hunting creepers all night-”

 

“STOP PLAYING DUMB! YOU THINK I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOUR ‘SECRET SOULMATE’? DO YOU SERIOUSLY THINK I’M THAT STUPID ?” Scar was full-on screaming now, tears streaming down his face in rivers. Grian backed up from the volatile man until his back hit the door. Scar stepped forward for every step Grian took back, closing every bit of the distance Grian tried to put between them until they only had a foot between them. 


“Fine! You’re right,” Grian confessed. “But you were the one who never wanted this in the first place! Unlike you , BigB treats me right. He never yells, never ignores me for hours on end, never acts like I’m a worthless tool to be discarded at the slightest hint of fault. Are you happy now?”

 

Scar started crying harder, entire body shaking violently. He didn’t say another word before turning around and running out of the room. “Wait- Scar! I didn’t mean it like that!” Grian yelled after the zookeeper. But it was too late. He was gone. “W-wait- please, just wait,” Grian whispered, before he collapsed crying on the floor to the sounds of an allay tinkling in the distance.

Notes:

yes i had to include the allay as soon as I saw it had a tag