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Kanade woke up feeling groggy, she wasn’t a morning person, to nobody’s surprise. The chime of her phone alarm rang through her ears as she fumbled for about 5 seconds to cancel her alarm. After all that song and dance (which really wasn’t as much effort as it felt like), Kanade sat up, groaning a little as he stretched. He opened his phone again to check the time, 10:01am it read.
Right, Kanade was meant to visit their father that day at around 12pm. Mafuyu instructed them to wake up at least 2 hours prior so they’d have time to wake up, eat, get ready, etcetera. Kanade personally didn’t think they needed that long to get themself ready to visit a hospital that was a 10 minute walk from their house, but listening to Mafuyu was usually the right option.
And so, Kanade started her day. Starting by making her way to the bathroom and taking a quick shower, followed by the brushing of her teeth. The composer didn’t consider herself a breakfast person, but after the (not-so) little incident a few weeks ago, everybody had been on Kanade’s case about eating regularly. She decided she didn’t fancy facing Mafuyu’s wrath that day.
While deciding on what to eat, Kanade dried his hair using a dryer and towel. Drying hair was always so tedious for him, but it wasn’t nice sitting around with wet hair either. Not to mention that it definitely wouldn’t air dry by the time he left.
Once his hair was reasonably dry (as in it wasn’t dripping wet, just damp), Kanade made their way to the kitchen, picking out a cereal that would provide a light meal. Alongside not being a morning person, Kanade also never really enjoyed breakfast at any point in their life. It felt too early to eat and heavy breakfasts always made Kanade feel uneasy.
After finishing breakfast, Kanade found herself in her bedroom, looking through her wardrobe with a limited selection of clothes. She was mostly looking for some sweatpants, since it was a little chillier outside that day, despite it being mid-Spring. Once she found what she was looking for, she dressed herself. Fishing his phone out of his pocket, Kanade checked on the time, it read 10:57am.
Kanade’s stomach churned, there was still just short of an hour left until she had to leave, she had no idea what to do with that time. She considered composing, but she knew if she started then she would lose track of time and turn up late; it happened once before, and the guilt destroyed Kanade for days. Kanade brought her thumb to her mouth, biting the nail anxiously. The anxiety of having so much free time and having nothing to do with said free time was almost dizzying. Who was Kanade if not constantly doing something? Sitting around doing nothing was so pointless, but there really wasn’t anything to do.
Kanade sighed and pushed down the fuzzy feeling that this uneasiness had brought upon them. They could wait 50 minutes.
Those minutes passed slowly, but eventually Kanade slipped their shoes on and left the house after checking if they’d remembered their keys and phone, before finally picking up the bag with their father’s clothes in it.
The walk to the hospital was about the same as usual. “Usual” involving Kanade having to sit at a bench for a few minutes due to the weight of the bag. Despite their stamina having improved, Kanade couldn’t always make the full trip without at least one stop.
Walking through the glass doors, Kanade offered small waves to the nurses who recognised her as a regular visitor. After checking in, she made her way to her father’s room.
Part of Kanade’s heart broke a little more seeing her father asleep, she’d hoped he was awake that day. Usually it didn’t feel this bad, it usually didn’t make her heart clench so bad. He felt overly sensitive that day, he didn’t know why. Trying to get through the visit without bursting into tears was a big challenge. Too big for Kanade.
Talking to somebody who couldn’t respond to anything you said was always difficult, the one-sided conversation picking him apart piece by piece.
30 minutes in, Kanade became too overwhelmed by his feelings, and felt that he had to cut the visit short. It was all too, too much. He wanted his dad, his partners, he wanted Mafuyu, he wanted Mizuki, Ena just anybody who’d be willing to hold him.
His dad was bedbound, Mafuyu was in school, Mizuki and Ena were both busy with something Kanade couldn’t quite recall that very second.
The journey home was faster than the journey there, Kanade needed to be away from it all. If Kanade had the stamina to run the whole way, they would’ve. Instead they opted for a speed-walk. Making it home in 7 minutes - record time for the composer.
Fumbling with the front door key, Kanade eventually got the door open, stumbling inside.
Just as Kanade was about to put their key on the hanger by the door, they noticed a second set of keys there, adorned with a purple cap. They were sure those weren’t there when they left earlier. Those were Mafuyu’s keys, for definite. which could’ve only meant one thing.
“Kanade? Are you back?” a familiar muffled voice came from the direction of the kitchen. Mafuyu was home; but it was only 12:40? He should’ve still been at school.
Kanade emerged from the hallway to the kitchen, where Mafuyu was. The composer walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, hiding her face and not saying anything.
Mafuyu reciprocated the embrace, running his fingers through Kanade’s hair, “Welcome back.” he mumbled. Though when no response came, confusion overcame the lyricist. Kanade was usually a bit more talkative than this, especially when one of the two would return home. “Is everything okay?” he asked, waiting patiently for Kanade’s response.
Kanade pulled back, feeling embarrassed. “Y-yes.” she muttered, voice hardly above a whisper, “Uh- you’re home early today…”
Mafuyu didn’t believe Kanade for a second, yet decided to go along with it. “Yes. We had a half-day at school. I told you yesterday. I got back about 10 minutes ago.”
Kanade blinked, he didn’t remember being told about the half-day. Mafuyu definitely would’ve said something though. Kanade’s head felt like it was stuffed with cotton. It was so fuzzy. “Hmm.” was the only response he could provide. Such a way with words. Some may call him Shakespeare.
Mafuyu cocked his head to the side, he picked up on Kanade’s limited vocabulary, the immediate physical contact that didn’t break after a few seconds, her droopy eyes. Hell, she could hardly keep herself upright.
“Kanade, are you sure everything is alright?” he asked, receiving nothing but a nod as Kanade leaned back into the hug.
Mafuyu sighed, his partner was a terrible liar. “Are you feeling small, Kanade?”
The composer didn’t have the energy to deny it at that point, nodding again and tightening her (weak) grip on Mafuyu’s shirt, tears spilling from her eyes. Mafuyu only hummed in acknowledgement and petted her head, thinking on what to do. Little Kanade was usually able to speak more than that - usually more than when she was in a normal headspace. She must’ve been feeling tiny to have gotten to this point.
Ideally, Mizuki or Ena would’ve been around to help. They were better at caring for littles than Mafuyu. But he remembered them saying they’d be preoccupied that day, so they were out of the question. The virtual singers weren’t exactly an option, either. They didn’t really understand the concept of regression, or how to act around little kids. So Mafuyu seemed to be on his own.
The group’s little gear was kept in Kanade’s room mostly. Mizuki had some of hers at home but Ena was too embarrassed about her own regression to keep her stuff in her room, in case anybody in her family decided to go snooping.
“Kanade, let’s go to your room. Your little stuff is there, remember?” Kanade nodded, still sobbing, holding onto Mafuyu’s hand as tight as she could in such a headspace.
Kanade’s room was the same as always - messy with papers strewn across the floor and the curtains shut. Though the lack of light was good, it meant that if Kanade would be willing to nap, it would be a lot easier for her to do so.
Mafuyu got Kanade settled in their bed, the younger sat on it with their legs crossed, still sniffling as tears rolled down their cheeks.
“I’m gonna get your stuff, okay Kanade?” Mafuyu squeezed their hand so they’d acknowledge him. Unfortunately, Kanade began to panic and cry harder as Mafuyu’s hand left theirs.
“Yuki no!” Kanade grabbed Mafuyu’s sleeve, reaching their other hand out so they’d get a better grasp.
Mafuyu sighed, not in annoyance, there weren't any bad feelings behind it. “Pup I’m just going across the room, it’s only there,” he pointed at a box, “I won’t go anywhere I promise. Think you can be brave for me?”
Hesitantly, the composer nodded, allowing herself to let go of Mafuyu for just a bit. He could be brave for a few seconds, yeah!
True to his word, Mafuyu stayed where Kanade could see him, and returned with the box, sitting next to the younger.
Mafuyu opened the box, digging out a light red pacifier with puppy paws on it, one that Kanade liked a lot. He presented it to her, “Here, sweetheart. You want this?”
Kanade observed it, before carefully taking it from Mafuyu’s hands and placing it in her mouth. Tears welled again, falling just as quickly as they formed. Mafuyu didn’t really know what to do, he thought that would calm them down!
“Do you not want it, pup?” Mafuyu questioned, tilting his head to the side. Kanade shook his head, “Want…” he mumbled around the pacifier. Wiping at his face.
The lyricist sat confused. Kanade couldn’t tell him what he wanted, and Mafuyu was not a mind reader, unfortunately.
“You want something else?”
A nod.
“What do you want, love?”
Kanade shrugged their shoulders.
Great.
Mafuyu looked around for something that could comfort the little one, nothing in the box seemed like anything Kanade would want in that state. Eventually his eyes landed on two plushies tucked in the corner of Kanade’s bed. A purple bunny and a blue puppy. He remembered Ena giving them to himself and Kanade when her brother’s friend had won them at an arcade. The artist claiming that she didn’t have the space in her room for more plushes.
The lyricist leaned over the bed and grabbed the plushies, showing them to Kanade; “Want these?”
Kanade stared at them, her tears halting. She nodded enthusiastically and took the puppy plush. She pushed the bunny back into Mafuyu’s arms and pointed to the plush, then to Mafuyu, “Yuki!” she called out.
Mafuyu looked at the bunny plushie, “The bunny is me?”
“Mm!” Kanade nodded, a big smile on her face - the first one Mafuyu had seen from them that day. It made his chest so warm, seeing one of his favourite people so happy. Kanade was so, so important to him. Therefore, her happiness was equally as important.
The composer yawned and rubbed their eyes, hugging the puppy closer. Mafuyu took a handkerchief from his pocket, wiping snot and tears from his baby’s face. He giggled a little to himself watching Kanade’s nose scrunch up as the handkerchief came across it.
“You wanna go down for a nap, Kana?” he asked, watching her eyes droop like they did earlier. Kanade nodded, looking up at Mafuyu.
“Yuki stay?”
“Always.”
The pair settled down, snuggling with each other and the plushies, tangled in blankies. Mafuyu kissed Kanade’s forehead gently as sleep too overcame his senses.