Chapter Text
Anonymous created “BP2 Top 24”
Anonymous added bookworm, god himself, fake vocalist, umbrella master, kani’s man, scott, polar bear, since when is sleeping a crime, pink hair, frederick, the real alpha, visual simp, no one remembers me, let me sing, uu, atlantis prince, bao bao hug me, yippee child, don’t touch my bed, child 1, child 2, dancing afterthought, clap clap bitch, and call me mister
Anonymous left “BP2 Top 24”
fake vocalist: ????????
fake vocalist: tf is this
fake vocalist: why is this my name
fake vocalist: so what if a rapper can sing
fake vocalist: hello god i need to report a grave offense
god himself: you called?
fake vocalist: who tf are you
god himself: bitch we were literally on the same team during the first mission
bookworm: leo I think that’s anxin
bookworm: xin = shin = god remember
fake vocalist: oh yeahhhhhh
fake vocalist: mb sorry
god himself: you better be
don’t touch my bed: zhou anxin
god himself: i accept your apology and forgive you wholeheartedly leo hyung
fake vocalist: woah there we don’t need to go that far
since when is sleeping a crime: @don’t touch my bed how did you get him to do that
since when is sleeping a crime: teach me your ways
kani’s man: you are a big child kangmin no one’s gonna listen to you
since when is sleeping a crime: EXCUSE YOU
fake vocalist: ooh discord
scott: dun dun dun
fake vocalist: now who tf are you
scott: can a man not be named scott
fake vocalist: you’re sanghyeon aren’t you
scott: ? how’d you guess
fake vocalist: i could smell it
scott: ?
bookworm: ?
god himself: ?
fake vocalist: anyways
fake vocalist: what’s this group chat even for
god himself: idk
scott: beats me
bookworm: it could be for extra content
fake vocalist: but the person who made the chat left
scott: what if it’s just like
scott: a chat
scott: for chatting
god himself: he’s a revolutionary guys
fake vocalist: wow woohoo bang bang pow pow cannonball
fake vocalist: i think we should figure out who’s who
god himself: why
fake vocalist: so we can gossip
god himself: that’s a good idea
fake vocalist: exactly
fake vocalist: so we already know a few people
fake vocalist: @fake vocalist is me (leo)
fake vocalist: @god himself is anxin
fake vocalist: @bookworm is sangwon
fake vocalist: @don’t touch my bed ?
god himself: that’s jiahao
fake vocalist: makes sense
fake vocalist: @since when is sleeping a crime is kangmin per @kani’s man
fake vocalist: @kani’s man has to be Junseo
fake vocalist: and @scott is sanghyeon
fake vocalist: so we got 17 more people to figure out
fake vocalist: let’s go in the order that person added us to the group chat
god himself: lol the next one is obvious
god himself: @umbrella master XINLONGGGGGGGG
umbrella master: hi
god himself: ;)
umbrella master: oh that’s ominous
god himself: ????
fake vocalist: hahahahahaha sucks to be you anxin
god himself: 🖕
don’t touch my bed: zhou anxin
god himself: ✌️
fake vocalist: lolololololol
fake vocalist: nexttttt
fake vocalist: who is @polar bear
god himself: oh ive got an idea
fake vocalist: damn bro leave some for the rest of us
god himself: @polar bear GEONWOO YOU STILL OWE ME FOURTEEN ICE CREAMS FOR NOT LETTING ME TURN ON THE AIR CONDITIONING
polar bear: IM SORRY
polar bear: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PAY YOU BACK WHEN YOU ONLY EVER GO TO HAIDILAO
polar bear: THEY DONT SELL ICE CREAM
god himself: IDK BUT THATS YOUR PROBLEM NOT MINE
fake vocalist: NO FIGHTING IN THE GROUPCHAT
god himself: @polar bear MEET ME OUTSIDE
bookworm: anxin I don’t think you’re going to win that fight
god himself: im not gonna fight him im gonna stab him with a knife and steal his wallet
bookworm: um
fake vocalist: geonwoo do not go outside
polar bear: wasn’t planning to
fake vocalist: maybe also lock your door
fake vocalist: moving on
fake vocalist: @pink hair ?
pink hair: Masato
fake vocalist: oh that makes a lot of sense
fake vocalist: btw how is your scalp holding up
pink hair: it’s holding
kani’s man: i saw a tuft of pink hair on your pillow
pink hair: not mine
kani’s man: mmmmhmmmmmm sureeeeee
fake vocalist: well I hope your head lives through the finals
fake vocalist: NEXTTTTTT~
frederick: hi hi
fake vocalist: wow I didn’t even have to @ you
fake vocalist: have you been stalking the chat
frederick: the chat has been stalking me with its incessant notifications
fake vocalist: sassy much
fake vocalist: … i lowkey don’t know who you are
frederick: 😢
scott: it’s liyu
fake vocalist: sorry liyu
fake vocalist: NEXTTTT
fake vocalist: anyone got any ideas about @the real alpha
god himself: def not kaiwen
yippee child: just give me a few more years bruh
god himself: yah that’s not happening
fake vocalist: @don’t touch my bed are you gonna do something
don’t touch my bed: no
fake vocalist: damn okay
fake vocalist: @the real alpha are you either junmin or donggyu
the real alpha: yes
fake vocalist: okay eeny meeny miny moe
fake vocalist: are you junmin
the real alpha: yes
god himself: thats how you spell eeny meeny miny moe???
fake vocalist: obviously 🙄
fake vocalist: NEXTTT
fake vocalist: @visual simp we know it’s you leejeong
fake vocalist: NEXTTTTT
god himself: Leo really clocked leejeong like that
fake vocalist: literally who else could it be
fake vocalist: don’t see anyone else drooling after pretty boys
god himself: who do you think he considers “pretty boys”
fake vocalist: sangwon, liyu, etc.
god himself: am i in that etc
fake vocalist: idk go ask him
don’t touch my bed: now you’ve done it
god himself: @visual simp SHOW YOURSELF
god himself: AM I PRETTY
visual simp: @don’t touch my bed should i answer him
don’t touch my bed: depends on your answer
visual simp: okay so I can’t tell him then
god himself: TELL ME
since when is sleeping a crime: tell my why~~
fake vocalist: wait I think I just saw anxin run down the hallway
don’t touch my bed: yeah
don’t touch my bed: he’s coming for you @visual simp
visual simp: huh
god himself: @visual simp LET ME IN
visual simp: HEKS BANGING ON MY DOOR HELP
visual simp: WHAT DO I DO
don’t touch my bed: distract him
fake vocalist: i got u
fake vocalist: @polar bear
fake vocalist: it’s your time to shine
polar bear: ????
fake vocalist: someone kick him out of the dorms
kani’s man: on it
polar bear: hello ????
polar bear: I didn’t consent to this ?????
polar bear: why do i queyhdncjsuwuwujdjdjdue
visual simp: SOS SOS SOSSSSSSS
bookworm: was that the sound of anxin punching the door
visual simp: HELPPPPPPPPPPP
kani’s man: done
polar bear: COULDNT YOU HAVE LET ME GRAB A JACKET AT LEASR BEFORE KICKING ME OUT
polar bear: IM FREEZING TO DEATH
polar bear: LET ME BACK IN
fake vocalist: 1. no 2. it’s only 16 degrees ???
*16 degrees Celsius = 60.8 degrees Fahrenheit
polar bear: I RUN COLD
polar bear: WHY DO YOU THINK I DIDNT LET ANXIN TURN ON THE AIR CONDITIONING
fake vocalist: oof
fake vocalist: @god himself yo I just saw geonwoo walk out the dorms
polar bear: I DID NOT WALK OUT I WAS DRAGGED
god himself: out the dorms you say
fake vocalist: yeah i see him out the window he’s just standing around the entrance
polar bear: HES LYING
kani’s man: i see him too anxin
kani’s man: he’s right outside the door
polar bear: I HATE ALL OF YOU
god himself: hmhmhmhmhmhmmmmm
visual simp: OMG THANK THE LORD HE FINALLY LEFT
bookworm: anxin just sprinted past me ?
bookworm: he’s running to the entrance ?
fake vocalist: @polar bear i would run
since when is sleeping a crime: run little boy runnnnn
umbrella master: did any of you guys hear a blood curling scream
umbrella master: it sounded kind of like geonwoo
umbrella master: im scared
fake vocalist: dw it’s just anxin
umbrella master: ?
god himself: what anxin wants anxin gets
umbrella master: 😨
umbrella master: im finding a place to hide
fake vocalist: @god himself did you get him
god himself: 🤭
fake vocalist: RIP geonwoo
don’t touch my bed: RIP
kani’s man: RIP
bookworm: RIP
since when is sleeping a crime: RIP
visual simp: RIP thank you for your sacrifice
fake vocalist: now that’s over
fake vocalist: NEXTTTTTT
fake vocalist: @no one remembers me ?
since when is sleeping a crime: what a name
no one remembers me: you don’t have to rub it in
let me sing: i remember you
no one remembers me: 🥰
since when is sleeping a crime: right in front of my salad ????
fake vocalist: NO FLIRTING IN THE GROUP CHAT
kani’s man: well based on that @no one remembers me is probably junil and @let me sing is probably haneum
fake vocalist: 🤮 couples
since when is sleeping a crime: you’re one to talk
fake vocalist: ???? uncalled for
fake vocalist: MOVING ON
fake vocalist: @uu ?
fake vocalist: ngl I don’t have a clue
don’t touch my bed: that’s hengyu
yippee child: hengyU get it
fake vocalist: …sure
uu: U was my stage name when i was with my old group
uu: uu was my nickname with fans
fake vocalist: wait that’s lowkey so cute
fake vocalist: definitely one of the better names in this place
fake vocalist: cough cough cough
kani’s man: you say that like your name is some kind of literary masterpiece
fake vocalist: MOVING ON
fake vocalist: @atlantis prince
fake vocalist: i think we all know who that is
fake vocalist: mr kang woojin
atlantis prince: hello hello 👋
kani’s man: now thats an actually good name
fake vocalist: lucky ducky
fake vocalist: why does he get such a good name
scott: probably because he hasn’t gotten any screen time so they don’t have anything else to give him a name off of besides his audition
fake vocalist: #justiceforwoojin
atlantis prince: thank you 🙏
atlantis prince: #justiceforeveryonerobbedbytheliveaudience
fake vocalist: REAL
kani’s man: ill do you guys one better
kani’s man: #justiceforeveryonewhohastodealwithmnetsbs
fake vocalist: PREACHHHHHHHH
scott: preachhhhhhhhhh
atlantis prince: im not sure what preach means but i agree
scott: we’re supposed to be fluent in English woojin you can’t be caught slacking like this
atlantis prince: sorry
atlantis prince: preachhhhhhhhhhh
fake vocalist: hell yeah
fake vocalist: nextttt
fake vocalist: @bao bao hug me
fake vocalist: i fear this is very obvious
since when is sleeping a crime: LI ZIHAO LI ZIHAO LI ZIHAO LI ZIHAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
bookworm: ah mah ssi~
fake vocalist: our favorite trendsetter icon king 👑
fake vocalist: next
fake vocalist: @yippee child
don’t touch my bed: kaiwen
fake vocalist: picked that up when anxin mentioned him earlier
fake vocalist: speaking of anxin is he done with geonwoo yet
don’t touch my bed: he hasn’t returned to the dorms yet so probably not
fake vocalist: poor geonwoo
fake vocalist: ig it is kind of his own fault though
fake vocalist: NEXT
fake vocalist: @don’t touch my bed we know you’re jiahao
fake vocalist: NEXT
fake vocalist: okay the next 2 are kinda confusing
fake vocalist: @child 1 @child 2
fake vocalist: is that supposed to be a cat in the hat reference
scott: cat in the hat is thing 1 and thing 2
fake vocalist: of course you’d be the resident cat in the hat expert
scott: liyu knows more than me actually
fake vocalist: ?? didnt know he was like that
fake vocalist: anyways they’re probably yunseo and chingyu
fake vocalist: who is which we can figure out later
fake vocalist: NEXT
fake vocalist: @dancing afterthought has to be yumeki
since when is sleeping a crime: now thats a tough name
since when is sleeping a crime: #giveyumekiscreentime
fake vocalist: lol second to last is an obvi too
fake vocalist: @clap clap bitch is hanwen for sure
kani’s man: i didn’t know our names could have explicitives
since when is sleeping a crime: you’re so old
since when is sleeping a crime: all the youngins call “explicitives” swear words nowadays
kani’s man: this is reason #384728 why no can take you seriously
fake vocalist: burnnnnnn
fake vocalist: we only have one person left
fake vocalist: so @call me mister has to be donggyu
fake vocalist: we did it guys
since when is sleeping a crime: 🎉
bookworm: has anyone seen anxin or geonwoo since the screaming
don’t touch my bed: nope
since when is sleeping a crime: nada
fake vocalist: welp
fake vocalist: someone should call zheyi or harry june and tell them that theres an opening