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Barking Up the Wrong Tree by shotafer for Pureheartedsnake
Fandoms: Squid Game (TV 2021)
12 Sep 2025
Tags
Summary
“There’s literally a zero percent chance,” Thanos chirped from behind. “Nada. Zilch. Periods are basically god’s contraception, Nam.”
Namgyu turned slowly to look at his boyfriend who still laid like a dog who couldn't take ''i can't take you for a walk, for the love of God!'' seriously, plugging his ears and singing to himself.
The raven sighed, pushing his glasses back against his face as they slid down his nose. “Actually, that’s not true. There’s still a risk because sperm can survive inside the body for up to five days, and if my cycle is irregular—”
“Booohoo,” The purple-haired man cut him off, making the raven almost throw a punch at his very, very sweet but punchable face, dragging out the word like a kid blowing rasperries at school. “You’re killing the vibe with your Wikipedia brain, you nerd.”
or
Thanos and Namgyu period sex. Yup.