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"Sink a pirate's ship. Scatter his crew to the four winds never to be seen again. Don't kill them, you don't want to invite retribution in your life. Slash his Jolly Roger and that's how you rid yourself of a pirate."
Roger had heard the old wives’ tale more than once across the islands they had visited. Drunks in bars loved to repeat it when the booze flowed fast enough. It was old enough by now that no one remembered who truly originated it. Many laughed about it; marines in particular found it distasteful. ‘The only way to rid yourself of a pirate is to kill it,’ they’d bluster, hand on their weapons.
An old wives’ tale. One that Roger was considering now that Crocus had somehow managed to cure him. They had not expected to find medical plants on Laugh Tale. Treasure, answers, an adventure, all that had been in the books. But the small plant, almost too delicate for the harsh winds blowing on the island, peeking from crevices in the rock and seeming to grow in the roughest conditions, was a surprise.
“Athelas,” Crocus had said almost reverently before picking it up and disappearing in the med bay for days without end. When he came out, he was haggard, dark circles under his eyes, but frenzied. He was holding the foulest concoction Roger had ever had the misfortune of drinking and was one step away from pouring it down his Captain’s throat himself. And it had worked; a month of that horrible tasting medicine and now Roger was alive, hale and contemplating his possibilities with Rouge asleep in his lap.
“Sink the ship,” Roger could not do this to his beloved Oro. She had taken them to the end of the world and back. But hide her. Hide her, he could. Tom would know the best place to hide her in Water 7, and if that didn’t work, the New World was vast enough. Taro would find a place for her.
"Scatter the crew," the Roger Pirates already had their orders - Rayleigh to take the little ones until it was safe again, the rest to go to ground. After Laugh Tale the marines had been relentless and the Roger Pirates had already done what they had planned. They had achieved their dreams. Parting would be hard, but not harder than losing any of them to death’s embrace.
“Slash his Jolly Roger,” That would pain him. That particular flag had flown for decades now, but he would do it if it meant Rouge and the baby now growing inside her would be safe. Ace. Roger just knew they would be a boy, regardless of what his wife thought.
Roger could keep them safe. He would keep them safe.
His old plans, the ones that centered on his death were all cast aside in the blink of an eye. He no longer needed risky deals with the marines to make sure the people most important to him would be alive and thrive. Roger would now be there himself to see Shanks and Buggy hitting the Seas and getting their own bounties. He would see Ace born and growing, hopefully following in his father’s shoes—although Roger wouldn’t mind awfully much if he became a bounty hunter like his mamma. As long as he wasn’t a marine.
Rouge muttered something in her sleep, her hand unconsciously slipping over Roger’s, placed on her stomach. The baby was too small to feel, not even a bump showing on his wife’s petite form, but already oh so loved.
Roger would make sure he grew up knowing that.
***
Hiding in plain sight was somehow easier than Roger had expected. Perhaps he needed to thank Garp for this again when he next saw the man.
The marine had schemed something with Rayleigh, the two of them refusing to share whatever they were doing with Roger. ‘Sorry, Captain you can’t lie for shit,’ was Rayleigh’s reason. And yet, at the end of their scheming, all of the Roger pirates had places where they could go to ground for several years before the world moved on and forgot about them. Roger himself would remain on Baterilla with Rouge and with a few visual alterations—he’d have to lose the mustache for a few years, but it was a small price to pay—no one would actually think to search for him there.
Garp had been right. No one looked at him gardening in the hibiscus field Rouge had planted and thought ‘this is the Pirate King.’ No one greeted his wife in the markets and remembered a time when she was sailing the seas as Rouge the Tempest, the best bounty hunter of their times. They were simply Roger and Rouge, the eccentric couple that lived in the house up the hill and danced at night under the stars in a field of flowers.
And when Ace finally arrived—because Roger had been right and the baby was a boy—the Pirate King realized all the treasure in the world couldn’t compare to the tiny, freckled and loud being that was placed in his arms.
Ace screamed like his life depended on it, a habit that somehow seemed to follow him even in his toddler years. He loved Rouge fiercely, becoming his mother’s own tiny protector as soon as he was old enough to hobble around in an attempt to walk. He loved listening to Roger’s stories of his adventures at sea, carefully curated for little ears, and absolutely adored his older brothers. Shanks and Buggy dropped by every year for the New Year Celebrations and the Captain and Ace’s birthdays, bringing gifts and later tales when they hit the Seas. To say Ace was enamoured would be putting it mildly. Sometimes, Roger thought ruefully that he was only the fourth most favourite person in his son’s life after Rouge and the boys.
Things were going well. Maybe too well, in Roger’s humble thought. And of course something had to happen to disturb the peace. That something ended up being Garp, holding a grinning (stretchy???) child and frowning in displeasure on Roger’s doorstep.
***
“Let me get this straight,” Roger said and prayed for patience, a drink, or both. Garp’s tale had given him a migraine, the likes of which he only had back when he had been sick. “My son, who I love and cherish and spent years drilling haki into his head. Forgot about haki and got his arm eaten by a baby Seaking of all things.”
“That’s the least important thing. HE MADE MY GRANDSON WANT TO BE A PIRATE!” Garp blustered, the kid he had brought with him snoozing in his arms, tired of the grownups’ discussion. Because of course Garp could never do anything normally and had arrived with the boy—Luffy, Roger remembered—at 4 in the fucking morning.
“Garp, that’s my kid we’re talking about! Excuse me if I’m more worried about his injuries,” Roger snapped back. He’d have to call Shanks, to see how he was recovering. Call Rayleigh to keep an eye on the boy, and Buggy to go watch after his brother until he healed properly. It was a good thing they were still in the East Blue. The boys knew that Sea like the back of their hands. They would be able to lay low until Shanks healed.
“I’m not fool enough to let that kid recover on his own,” Garp grumbled, stopping Roger’s spiraling thoughts in their tracks. “I saw him grow up, Roger, you know I protect family. I made sure he and that no-good husband of his reached Orange Town safely, before picking Luffy up and coming your way. Your other kid’s doctor is a witch, but the best damned doctor I’ve seen in the East. Between Nova and Shanks’ own doctor they’ll make sure he is fine, so stop your fretting. You can yell at your kid for forgetting about haki later.”
Roger took a deep breath to steady himself. Good, that was good. Not optimal. Optimal would have been Shanks not losing an arm, but it was good enough that he could stop stressing until he had either of his sons or Beckman on call. He could return to the matters at hand which were the drooling kid in Garp’s lap.
“So what do you want me to do with the little munchkin here? If you’re so upset that Shanks put thoughts of piracy in his head, I have to remind you, retired or not, I am still the King of the Pirates.”
“Exactly! Can’t raise the kid like a proper marine now because he won’t stop yelling about being the King of the Pirates when he grows up. And with the waves Dragon is making, he’ll be in danger the moment he steps foot out of Dawn and hits the Blues. He wants to become King of the Pirates so bad? Figured, the actual King of the Pirates can raise and train him. At least if he becomes a no-good lawless miscreant, he’ll have the Code explained to him properly and know what to expect on the Seas. Little fool made a raft for himself and was going to go sailing on his own. He’s seven, and a devil fruit eater. He sinks. None of those little issues seemed to cross his mind.”
Roger hated to admit it, but he could see Garp’s logic. Some of his thoughts probably showed on his face because his rival/friend gave him a look that could curdle milk.
Well, Roger had already raised two boys and was raising a third. What could possibly go wrong with having a fourth one?
***
The answer seemed to be that everything could indeed go wrong. Ace heard little Luffy introduce himself ‘My name is Monkey D. Luffy and I’m gonna be King of the Pirates!’ and it was on sight. Biting and scuffling involved. His son had never before voiced a desire to chase after the One Piece, but apparently hearing Luffy be bold enough to declare his dreams and to the son of the actual Pirate King at that, made Ace decide that title was going to be his. And that he’d drop Luffy from a cliff for suggesting otherwise. Luckily there was only one cliff in Baterilla and the kids had no access to it, because Roger was only half-sure Ace’s threats were only bluster and bravado.
From then the hostilities continued. At least on Ace’s part, because Luffy decided on the spot they were going to be best friends and brothers, trailing after Roger’s son everywhere. The man could feel new grey hairs forming with each new mess the kids got themselves in.
“He tied Luffy in knots around a tree,” Roger said, head dropping on the table, making Rouge peel in laughter. “It took me half an hour to untie him.”
“They’ll come around to each other,” she soothed. “Ace had never had to share us before. Shanks and Buggy are his beloved older brothers, but they’re not here long enough for him to think they’re hogging our attention. Besides, Ace is upset about Shanks’ injury and is also acting out about it.”
“I’m glad he’s not blaming Luffy for it, to be perfectly honest,” Roger nodded. When Ace had heard about Shanks’ injury, he had been incensed.
“He doesn’t dislike Luffy quite as much as he makes it seem,” Rouge winked, whispering as if sharing a secret. “He heard the whole tale about the bandits and his only problem was that Shanks had been, and I quote, ‘dumb enough to forget about haki.’ Blaming Luffy didn’t even occur to him because he had already seen red earlier in that tale when he heard the bandit put a gun to the boy’s head and then threw him in the Sea when he couldn't swim. Apparently being eaten by a Sea King was too good a fate for that particular bandit.”
Roger couldn’t help but laugh at her words. Their son had inherited both of their protectiveness and vicious streak. Roger couldn’t wait to see the storm he’d leave in his wake when he finally hit the Seas. It was bound to be spectacular. Once again the man found himself mentally thanking Crocus for his medical talent.
“Well, the kids are busy trying to kill each other,” Rouge grinned and came behind him, wrapping her arms around his neck and whispering in his ear. “How about we steal some time for ourselves, hmmm?”
***
The hostilities stopped as fast as they started. One day Ace was still trying to run away from Luffy and ignoring him, the next he came home giving the little one a piggyback ride, scowling fiercely and telling Rouge they were never going into town again. Luffy was hiding his head in Ace’s shirt, and before anyone could find out what happened, the kids were firmly sequestered in Ace’s room with the door shut.
‘No parents allowed,’ was later written messily and then stuck to the door with glue. Roger was baffled. Rouge found the first hints of what would one day be Ace’s teenage rebellion phase utterly hilarious.
Answers came to them only several days later, days in which the kids had firmly ignored them only to plot with one another. Ace and Luffy came back from wherever they had run off to, back to town as it turned out, covered in flour and sticky juice, laughing their little heads off.
It turned out the children in town, upon discovering Luffy was a devil fruit user, had promptly started calling him a demon and a monster, making the younger boy cry and utter the ancient promise of retribution. Said retribution had been plotted in the confines of Ace’s room and delivered as swiftly as possible. It involved flour bombs, juice bags and some of the fire crackers Ace still had from Buggy.
Needless to say, the boys were utterly proud of themselves. The Town Mayor not so much when he came huffing and puffing on their doorstep. Roger was happy that Rouge decided she would tackle that particular problem. He was less amused that he would be the one that would have to wrangle two little sticky monsters into a bath, one of which hated water with a passion.
***
The days turned peaceful again. The boys laughed and giggled and grew, challenged each other in ways Roger could never have expected. The first time Shanks dropped by after Lufy had been brought to Baterilla by Garp, the munchkin had gasped in betrayal and hidden under the bed, unwilling to come out. His elder son just about killed himself laughing before he explained the promise and how exactly Roger’s old hat ended up adorning Luffy’s head, a question Roger himself had never thought to ask. Ace had been the one to coax his little brother out, saying it didn’t count if he saw Shanks now. ‘You’re not a pirate now, dummy. It only counts after you set sail.’ He then proceeded to kick his elder brother in the shins because he was still laughing.
Sometime later, when Luffy ended up meeting Buggy, he just about broke everyone’s heart by starting to cry that he had such a big family now and he’d never have to be alone again. Before either Rouge, Roger, or even Ace could react to that, Buggy had scooped Luffy up and hugged him, coaxing him to laughter again by detaching his fingers and tickling the boy everywhere. There was perhaps no one in Roger’s family that understood being alone better than Buggy did.
Days passed. Life continued and Roger kept thinking back to the old wives’ tale that had led him to having everything he had ever wanted and more.
"Sink a pirate's ship. Scatter his crew to the four winds never to be seen again. Don't kill them, you don't want to invite retribution in your life. Slash his Jolly Roger and that's how you rid yourself of a pirate."
Maybe he wasn’t a pirate anymore, but it didn’t matter. Not when Rouge was smiling at him, her head in his lap and sprawled across the grass, hibiscus in bloom all around them. Not when the two little gremlins they called sons were giggling from a nearby bush, thinking they were very smart and no one knew they were there.
Yes, Roger wasn’t a pirate anymore, but it didn’t matter. His Era had long since ended anyway. And he was looking forward to his two youngest sons setting sail and the chaos they would unleash on the Seas.
“Which one of them do you think will find it?” he found himself musing out loud. Stories about Laugh Tale and the One Piece had been utterly banned by little Luffy when he had joined them. He claimed he didn’t want a boring adventure. Rouge giggled from his lap, casting a glance at the bush where the kids were.
“Luffy. Ace doesn’t really want it, he just wants to annoy his brother. Besides, I think Luffy will be the one to give us the most grey hairs until he achieves his dream. With Ace, I’m more concerned Eddie will take a shine to him and try to steal him.”
“No way is Newgate getting his hands on MY son.”
Retirement or not, Roger would steal a ship or bring the Oro out from where she was hidden if Newgate tried his tricks with any of his kids. Rouge’s voice snapped him out of his dreams of throttling Newgate if he tried anything, by adding in a sweet voice that promised a headache in his future.
“By the way, Garp called earlier today. He’s bringing Luffy another brother. Apparently he adopted himself a new grandson that his bandit friend found in the trash dump on his home island.”
Roger suddenly very much wanted to copy his blue haired son and start screeching. He was sure, if anything, any potential new grandson of Garp’s would only triple the chaos Ace and Luffy got in on a regular basis.
He needed a drink. He needed several drinks.