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I love you, I love you not, I love you?

Summary:

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She had first looked at Reina Burka in year 11. She had instantly had a sort of pull on her. Like moth to a flame.

For a long time, she had thought that Reina would never set her on fire.

But she was wrong, wasn’t she?

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Violet wants to love Reina, but she can't forget October 1st, 2020.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Violet never had many comfortable moments ever since October 1st, 2020.

But sometimes a bit of calmness has covered the storm that has built up into a monster beyond her control ever since that day.

This moment, is one of pure bliss for Violet. Sure, not everything is how it could’ve been - but it’s the best that she can get at the moment.

Saint Gabriel's Mental Institution is a light name for the crimes that have passed through the old workers' heads in 2013 — the time that the establishment thrived in. But still justice will be given to the ones who died beneath Gabriel’s selfish, greedy grasp.

But right now, that’s not the point. The only thing that matters to her right now, is the girl who stands in front of her.

She had first looked at Reina Burka in year 11. She had instantly had a sort of pull on her. Like moth to a flame.

For a long time, she had thought that Reina would never set her on fire.

But she was wrong, wasn’t she?

In every way, Reina had captivated her with her straight dirty blonde hair, straightforward attitude and those hypnotising bright golden eyes that were always filled with the most endearing determination she’d ever seen in someone.

She had immediately wanted to take her in, keep her forever make sure nobody would try to even cross her.

For a while, it had worked like that. Despite their opposing and clashing personalities they had always looked out for each other. They were no doubt- inseparable best friends.

At least that’s what she thought until October 1st, 2020. The start of their Cold War.

Before then, her life had been picture-perfect. Despite her mother not being in the picture, her father gave her more than enough love to make up for it. She had always been the apple of his eye.

She thought that her boyfriend, Kai Zect had loved her too.

But oh how wrong she had been again.

Despite her boyfriend, despite her friend group's care for her. Everything had come crumbling down on October 1st, 2020.

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She remembered that day as clear as glass.

She and her friend, Juniper had set off to look for Reina who had been radio silent since yesterday. When she walked past the halls she got looks of pity which made her shudder under the sheer thought of what the reason could be that they were pitying her for.

People had whispered around her which felt like the knot was tightening around her throat.

She had asked what they were talking about but they just gave her a frightened look and scurried away.

By the fifth person, she was absolutely furious. But it wasn’t because they were ignoring her questions.

It’s because she knew her own best friend, Reina had been avoiding her like the plague for whatever this was. The person she thought she could tell anything to. Her ride or die.

She had stormed around the school ready to settle this once and for all.

Oh, how she wishes she had just stayed curious.

As soon as it caught her eye she had gone frigid as her soul practically left her body.

In front of her, her best friend was pinned against the wall and the person pinning her?

Her own boyfriend.

She had immediately felt the anger flare up in her body like an overwhelming force ready to murder anyone.

Reina’s panicked face after she pushed Kai off her and started frantically telling her “It’s not what you think please,” over and over again only poured gasoline over the flames.

After seeing her boyfriend’s unbothered smug face along with that it all became a blur of screaming, threats and anger.

She had never forgiven Reina despite her trying to explain over and over again. She didn’t want to hear that manipulative witches weightless explanation.

It had stayed like that after that day of October 1st, 2020.

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Up until November 2nd, 2020.

That was when all the chaos had broken out.

Screaming, begging, pleading was all that filled her ears after person after person had vanished in front of her eyes. As those calculated cold ghostly eyes invaded her vision.

Violet had run.

Ran for her life.

And she found her life, but not the life she wanted.

In front of her stood her ex-best friend Reina.

3 other people had stood there with her.

She slowly got familiar with them.

They were all called;
Ellie Rig
Davis Kann
Aspen Kerres

Out of all of them, they had to pick only 4 of them to live.

And painfully she knew, she was the one who was going to be thrown away.

They all had a skill set of their own. What they needed to have, was;

Someone with determination and intelligence who could document and investigate ghost activity with a spirit book and spirit goggles. - Reina fit perfectly into that role.

A fearless, calculated person who could stay calm enough to directly talk to spirits and look around for physical evidence of a ghost's presence, equipped with a spirit box and UV flashlight. - Davis fit that role like it was made for him, which it might have been.

A hyper-focused, tech-savvy genius who could keep track of ghost movement, activity and state of mind to help the group stay alert and safe, equipped with a thermometer, ghost camera and motion sensors. - Aspen had been everything they needed for that role.

And finally, someone who was also fearless, fierce, determined, strong and flexible. Someone to step in when things got too serious to handle, when a ghost was erratic, and unsalvageable. Someone who knew how ghosts worked and hunted. Someone who could apathetically eradicate and hunt ghosts that couldn’t be saved. They were equipped with a ghost vacuum, ghost-resistant clothing and a ghost ray-gun. - a role that would belong to either her, or Ellie.

They couldn’t take an extra person along because that would make it too easy to be separated, killed and a burden on the whole team - according to Davis.

She looked at Ellie, who was shaky yet stone-faced. The epitome of ready and willing for the role.

While she looked down at herself, similarly stoic yet full of thoughts.

In the end, they left the decision up to the most intelligent and smart person on the team.

Reina.

For sure she would pick Ellie, someone who hadn’t humiliated her cursed her out and outright refused to come with her into this room in the first place.

Reina had looked at her with an unreadable expression.

Finally, she said.

“We will take Violet with us.”

She looked up at her thinking she had heard wrong. Yet Reina was steady with her decision.

Davis, who was Ellie’s best friend questioned her relentlessly over her decision. But Reina had stayed calm and explained why.

In her words, I had always been the type of person to jump in and save someone when it’s hard. I was a master when it came to being apathetic and resolving everything when it went too far.

Heck, she even remembered how I had told her once about how I had an abnormal interest in the paranormal and loved reenacting ghost hunting with some toy ghost equipment when I was younger.

That was the only thing that had proved to Violet that maybe she deserved and even wanted to live for not just because she herself needed to. But because she had other people who needed her to.

Her friends her father, and even Reina somehow believed in her.

This didn’t make her forgive Reina. She thought back then.

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This didn’t make her forgive Reina. She thought again now.

Despite her whirlwind of thoughts, she stayed silent and still as Reina wrapped up her wound with soft, raw care for her.

She wanted to think she cared for her. That October 1st, 2020 was all a mistake. But at the same time, October 1st, 2020 was a mistake she will never forget.

She wanted to think, maybe Reina had always loved her back.

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“I always loved you, even in this moment now, especially now.”

Reina had thought with a smile on her face as she ran her hands through Violet's braided, soft silky ginger hair.

She watched those curved, captivating violet eyes stare at her.

But Violet had always captivated her even when those eyes were hidden from the start. Reina thought.

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Everything in this moment felt like bliss. Reina and Violet both thought.

Notes:

i see you ashley

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