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"I'm not, you know," Kurogane says, wiping sweat from the brow, as they stand in the slim noonday shadow of a gate's arch. Here in the country of Clow the sun shows no mercy, and even Kurogane, resolute in the face of great evil, certain death, and bare arms in a frozen castle, tends to overheat. To say nothing of Fai, who even now resembles less a man and more a blonde-tufted puddle, too warm even to hang from the other's neck and shove his nose into whatever shoulder hollows make themselves readily available.
"Not what?" The tone is teasing but all their time together taught Kurogane to hear the earnest question beneath. Fai's blotchy red face smiles impishly up at him.
Funny, how after all they've been through, it's still awkward to say.
"Not manly," Kurogane finishes.
Time was, not too long ago, Fai's singular eye hardened and went opaque against the world -- mostly Kurogane. Now he has both back, and they smooth open without ever barring the way through. Love, Tomoyo said, is a miracle. But it's not that, exactly, that's changed them so thoroughly.
Trust. Commitment. A willingness to change, to improve, to take care of each other -- and themselves. Faith in the face of fear.
"Not womanly, either," Kurogane clarifies.
The seizing of the chest, the catch of the breath -- these aren't new feelings. This isn't a new thing being spoken. And Fai, though he's never heard it before, only nods, eyes still open and locked on Kurogane's. The heat haze around them could hold the whole world off, and every other world they've ever seen. This should have been terrifying -- and it was -- but it feels more like a load finally dropped to the ground. Deep breath in, and a smile to match Fai's. The soft one that he's wearing now, the one that came with freedom.
This feels like freedom.
"I'm terribly sorry," says Fai, "I was entirely mistaken. Not manly at all. No. Strong. Determined."
Kurogane takes him by the shoulders. The heat of skin on skin doesn't seem to matter anymore. "Beautiful," says Fai.
He's tasted of many things, throughout their travels together. These days... he tastes like home.