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“Baron!”
He hated that voice, the way the man called out for him. Varian and Zemo had no idea how they’d ended up in this situation, but maybe it was for the best that they had ended up together.
Both of the men were making their way through what they hoped was an abandoned city. At least they think it was abandoned, there were no noises, no people, not even the sound of footsteps were heard.
But when Varian called out Zemo’s name, the man looked over, seeing Varian hurled over, either finding someone or something that could be useful to them.
“What did you find?”
Walking over to where Varian was, Zemo perked over his shoulder.
“Guns and ammo.”
Vines practically covered the room, Varian had stepped forward, perking deeper inside as he noticed the window half broken. Making his way over he simply smashed it with a bat he was carrying on his back, stepping into the building through the now fully open window.
“Well that’s one way to get inside.”
Zemo joked, it was good they could still joke during moments like this. Varian looked around, grabbing two small handguns and then some ammo which they could put in their bags and pockets.
“It’s not much. But it should be good enough.”
Varian spoke, looking at Zemo who was still outside the home.
“Are you coming inside?”
“I don’t like this.”
“Well we’re in the middle of a zombie apocalypse, you can’t really be picky.”
“That’s not what I meant. Something is going to go wrong here.”
“What? Do you just ‘feel’ it?”
“I do. Just get out of that dark house before something happens."
Rolling his eyes, Varian slowly came closer and closer to the window, passing Zemo some supplies that he’d just found in the house.
“I’m fine. Nothing is around.”
Suddenly, Varian turned around, hearing a shuffling coming from further into the home.
“Don’t-”
“I’m checking it out.”
“Varian!-”
Of course Varian had to ignore Zemo. It wasn’t like he was going to die. If there were any zombies here either of them would have heard it already.
Stepping over trash on the ground, Varian made it closer and closer to where the noise was, taking in a large inhale, the pungent smell of something hitting his nostrils. It was like something was dead in the back of the home. Yet Varian still continued forward, he didn’t care, he knew how to protect himself and knew that Zemo was backup in case anything did go wrong.
Walls were battered, wallpaper torn, paint scratched off the walls. Boards on the floor, vines growing from places where vines shouldn’t be. The whole house was completely abandoned and had seemed to be for months.
Turning the corner, Varian finally put the smell onto something physical. A corpse. Mangled and gross, seeing it decomposing, blood on the walls, floors, the way it pooled, the way organs spilled out, slumping onto the floor in a gross pile.
Instantly, Varian covered his mouth with his hand, stepping back and facing away. He’d seen some fucked up shit but this was a different kind of fucked up — that and he was trying not to throw up in his hands.
Stumbling backwards, the pungent smell clogged his senses, eyes shutting tight as he tripped behind him, crashing to the floor.
“Varian!!-”
Zemo didn’t hesitate to jump inside despite everything in his mind telling him not to. He needed to ensure that Varian was okay. Seeing the man on the floor, Zemo instantly helped the man up. Cupping his face. He couldn’t lose Varian now, if something happened he needed to be there for him.
“I’m here, I’m here, what happened? What did you see?”
Slowly tethering himself back into reality, Varian managed to open his eyes to look at his lover. Zemo was there for him, through thick and then, never leaving his side.
“It was worse than anything I'd ever seen.”
A small mutter left Varian's lips. The way they trembled, the way Zemo couldn't have protected him from the gruesome sight that he saw was plaguing and filling his mind.
“I'm sorry.”
“Why are you sorry?”
“I couldn't save you from that.”
Despite everything, a smile crept onto Varian's face. He pushes forward, his forehead connecting with his lovers.
“You are not at fault. Baron.”
He uttered softly. Tethering himself to the man.
“Besides, maybe it wasn't that bad…”
“Are you sure?”
“I'm sure. Just spooked me for a minute.”
Varian chuckled softly as he gently pushed his lips against the other man. Embracing him in gentle affection.
Pulling away both of them had then begun to leave the home. Varian tried to put the disturbing image of the decomposing corpse into the back of his mind.
“Let's just get going.”
Zemo nodded in agreement. His hand sliding down to link together with his boyfriends. All they had was each other. They didn't want to be apart ever again.
“I love you.”
Words filled the silence. Varian looked over.
“Don't say that.”
“Say that I love you?”
“You're saying it with a tone that sounds like you're either going to die or you're hiding something from me.”
“Haha. I'm not. I genuinely love you. I really do.”
"I love you too, Baron.”
Both of them continued on.
Neither of them spoke after this, walking in silence, looking around and scanning all of the areas to be able to check for any dangers, check for exits and escape routes.
Though perhaps both of them were a little too focused to realise where they were, more buildings looked broken and abandoned, overgrown with vines and dangerous plants.
Zemo’s grasp on Varian tightened as he pulled the man closer towards him.
“Be careful.”
He spoke, pulling Varian away from what looked to be a poisonous plant.
“Thanks…”
Varian muttered in response.
“I think we should check around some more. You check that house and I’ll check this one?”
Suggested the man, Zemo looked at him with concern and shock.
“You really want to split up?”
“It sounds like a good idea. We can get more things that way.”
As much as Zemo didn’t want to separate, especially since he didn’t want Varian to be alone, what if something happened like before? Zemo wouldn’t be able to get there in time.
“I’ll be okay. I promise.”
“You better.”
Slowly, their hands slipped from each other's grasps. Varian instantly goes to one of the buildings on his right, Zemo going to the left hand side to search in one of the other buildings.
Moments felt like hours until a scream was heard.
Instantly, Zemo knew that it was Varian. He didn’t hesitate to break down a door by running into it.
Pulling out his handgun, Zemo quickly jumped through a window to get to where his lover was.
That was where the gruesome sight was.
Varian on the ground, being toppled over by a zombie trying to bite him. And considering the blood pouring from Varian’s arm. It already did.
Zemo didn’t hesitate to shoot the zombie in the head, killing it once again as it flopped off of Varian.
Clutching at his arm, Varian turned over to see Zemo.
“Baron!-”
He tried to get up but Zemo simply rushed to his side, keeping him on the floor.
“Don’t. Don’t get up.”
Muttered the man, holding his lover in his arms, hand tracing the wound that Varian covered.
“Baron… Baron, you have to kill me.”
“What? No. I’m not killing you.”
“You have to. Otherwise I’ll kill you too. We’d… I don’t want to do that to you.”
“We both know that I don’t care as long as I’m with you.”
Those words echoed through Varian’s mind. He didn't want anything to happen to Zemo. He didn’t want Zemo to die, yet he didn’t want Zemo to watch as Varian turned into one of those disgusting zombies.
“Please.”
“I can’t.”
“Yes you can.”
Varian’s free hand moved over to cup Zemo’s cheek, his hand a little covered in blood yet Zemo didn’t care about that at all.
“No. Varian. I won’t do that to you. I can’t kill you. Varian I need you.”
Even though Zemo couldn’t tell, Varian used his thumb to gently wipe a tear away, his voice became more groggy, his head hurting, pounding with a pain he’d never felt before.
“I know. I know it's hard. But I can’t live like a zombie. I can’t do that. I don’t want you to see me turn into one of those.”
“I refuse to kill you. I’d rather kill us both.”
That hand that was placed on Zemo’s cheek fell, Varian’s face managing to form a half smile from the corner of his lips.
“Baron…”
“Varian I can’t.”
“I know you can. You’ve done it before.”
“They weren’t you!”
Moving his hand back to clutch at the bite wound, Varian’s arm felt weak, limp, as if it was about to just detach from him at any given moment
“I know. I know. But you have to. Baron, please.”
“You know I can’t.”
“It’ll be okay. Live on for me. Fight this fucking curse for me. For Heike and Carl. Okay? Do it for us.”
“But I want to be with you. I don’t want to leave you. I don’t want to kill you.”
“It’s okay, I’ll be with them. It’ll be okay. I’ll be waiting for you.”
Slowly, Zemo moved to grab his handgun, cocking it back to reload the bullet in the chamber. He let go of Varian, slowly rising to his feet.
“Do you promise me?”
“Always.”
“Do you love me?”
“I never stopped.”
With that, he pointed the gun to Varian's head, seeing the man lying on the floor, his arm a gross blue-like color.
“I love you, Baron.”
“I love you, Varian.”
The trigger was pulled.
Zemo never flinched. Never before.
This was different. It was always different when it came to the one he loved the most. He didn’t want to do something like this but he had to.
Eyes thinned, glaring down at the now dead body that laid in front of him. Zemo paused, hesitating. He could feel his heart shatter into multiple pieces.
His final anchor.
Gone.
Without hesitation Zemo cocked the gun back, placing it under his own chin, finger on the trigger. Yet for some reason he just couldn’t push it. Was it the guilt? The remorse?
Either way he couldn’t pull that trigger despite it being the only thing he wanted. But he couldn’t do it here.
Zemo put the gun away, squatting down to grab Varian off of the floor. Holding the corpse in his arms as he began to walk. He didn’t want them to die here.
If there was one good thing, it's that Zemo recognised the area they were in. Heike’s and Carl’s graves were close by.
They could finally all be buried together.
Thankfully, it didn’t take long for Zemo to find the cemetery they were buried at. Making his way over to his wife and son's grave.
In loving memory of Heike and Carl Zemo. Wife and Son to Helmut Zemo.
Carefully, Zemo gently lowered the corpse between the two. Varian laid there, lifeless, a little blue but that wasn’t an important detail. He wasn’t going to be a zombie, neither was Zemo. He didn’t want that for the other love of his life.
Both Heike and Varian were important lovers in his life and he could never choose one over the other. For a moment he hesitated once again, pulling the gun from his pocket, gently lowering himself to lean against Heike’s grave, then placing Varian’s head in his lap.
Even though that was a dead body he was holding onto, Varian was still a person before all of this. Someone with feelings. Hope — even if it was very little. A life. He had everything Zemo wished he had.
With a slow and considerate breath, Zemo muttered.
“I’ll be with you all finally.”
In Sokovian. He’d never forgotten it. The way he and his wife would speak, him and his kid, him and Varian. It was all… Familiar.
And now he was going to be able to be with them. Away from this cruel and unforgiving world.
Placing the gun under his chin, Zemo let out a breath.
“Thank you.”
Everything was quiet.
He was free.