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It was a hot July day and Pete Wentz walked out of a movie theater, disappointed for he just saw the new Smurfs movie and he HATED it, he hated it so much that he needed to tweet about it. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, opened chrome and logged into twitter and posted “i would rather listen to baby shark for a century than EVER watch the new smurf again.” He posted it, thinking nothing would happen, maybe a few hate comments from die hard smurfs fans but nothing else.
The next day.
Pete was woken up from 50 angry texts from Joe Trohman. Turns out Joe is the biggest smurfs fan and is absolutely pissed about the tweet he made. Pete opens twitter, hoping that Joe was the only really angry person but to his dismay, everyone was angry. A myriad of people were PISSED about the tweet and even Patrick Stump made a new twitter just to comment “WHAT THE FUCK PETER?!?!”
Pete was shocked. Smurfs are even that good but people want him dead for speaking about his disliking for that God awful movie.
Suddenly his landline started to ring. As he checked the caller ID he realized it was Andy. Perhaps he was going to talk to him about next weeks concert but he was wrong, so very wrong…
Pete picked up the phone and immediately his ear was blasted with Andy screaming vulgarities at him. “YOU STUPID UNCULTURED FUCKASS WHORE BITCHFACE FUCKING SLUT! THE SMURFS MOVIE IS A CINEMATIC MASTERPIECE YOU STUPID UNCULTURED CUCK!!" Andy screamed through the phone like Pete had just called his wife and mother a whore. “CALM DOWN ANDY!" Pete managed to get through before Andy went back on his screaming rampage. “SHUT UP YOU BITCH ASS MOTHERFUCKER, LITTLE STI RIDDLED SHITHEAD! DON'T SHOW UP TO THE CONCERT WE ALREADY HAVE MIKEY WAY STANDING IN!” Andy screamed through the telephone, rage as clear as a day. Pete was incredibly offended so he hung up.
He was so hurt by the entire interaction that he sprawled out on his couch and sobbed.
