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"My family wants to meet you."
Dick takes in Wally's anxious fidgeting, eyes darting and hands restless, with a frown. "And that's… bad?"
"It's really bad."
"They do know we're dating, right?"
Wally's head snaps up. "Yes! Of course they do. It's just…"
"Yeah?"
"They can be a bit… much."
Dick lets out a breath. "I can handle families being 'a bit much.'"
"Not this kind of much. You know the dad with a shotgun stereotype? Okay, imagine that, except it's two guns. And they’re not your dad. And they’re more lethal."
Dick cocks a brow, lips quirked up with mirth. "More lethal than a gun?"
Wally falls into his chair dramatically. "You're not taking this seriously."
"Walls—"
"I know that my family is… unconventional."
"You went to live with your Aunt Iris when you were a kid who is married to your Uncle Barry who is dating your Uncle Len who is not dating your Uncle Mick."
"Okay when you say it like that it's not that complicated."
Dick pulls Wally into his side. "Everything is going to be fine. Parents love me. And hey, I’ve already met Barry and Iris.”
“Yeah, but they’re Uncle Barry and Aunt Iris. My other uncles are… it’s just…”
“I’m sure they’re going to love me.”
.-~*~-.
As Dick stands at their door, a tin of freshly baked cookies in hand (made by Alfred, but they don’t need to know that), he is not prepared to be met with the giant of a man covered in thick burn scars and scowl that could rival Bruce.
“Uhm, hi,” Dick says, voice cracking on his words. “I’m Dick Grayson. I’m—”
The man grunts and takes the tin from him before stalking back into the house.
With wide eyes, Dick reluctantly follows.
The man takes a seat at the dining table, tossing the tin of cookies in the center where a charcuterie spread is laid out, and takes a swig of his beer.
“Uh,” Dick says. “This looks delicious.”
“He may not look it, but Mick’s a charcuterie connoisseur.”
Dick doesn’t jump at the new voice, instead turning with a bright smile, hoping that he’ll make a better impression on Wally’s other uncle but pauses as he finally recognizes who the two are.
Leonard Snart, Captain Cold, one of The Flash’s rogues, twirls his cold gun absent mindedly.
“I’m guessing introductions don’t need to be made then. It seems my reputation precedes me.”
Dick holds out his hand anyways. “Dick Grayson.”
“Len,” he replies, shaking his hand firmly, enough to hurt.
It’s then that Wally enters with trepidation, looking at the exchange warily.
“It seems you all have already met.”
“These cookies are fucking delicious,” Mick grunts, the first words he’s spoken since Dick’s arrived.
“You’ve got a beautiful home,” Dick says, the ill-fitting script falling from his lips.
“Thanks,” Len says flat. “I’m sure it doesn’t compare to the mansion you grew up in.”
“I grew up in a trailer actually,” Dick says. “In the circus.”
Len’s lips quirk up. That must be the right answer because he claps Dick on the shoulder. “C’mon. Take a seat. Mick didn’t spend hours with the cheese monger just for it not to be eaten.”
Conversation seems to go easier then, especially when Dick mentions his stepmother, Selina, who is infamous in thief spaces.
They’re slightly disappointed that he didn’t follow in her footsteps, but also seem relieved that Wally hasn’t gotten himself caught up with someone that is in their line of work.
“So, how did you and Barry get together?” Dick asks.
“It was a bit of a game of cat and mouse,” Len says with a smirk. “And, well, somehow he caught me and didn’t let me go.”
“You make it sound like you’re being held here hostage, Len,” Barry says, entering with a bottle of wine. “Dick! Glad that you could make it, kid.”
“Glad to be here,” Dick says. “Is Iris joining us?”
“She got caught up at work. New break in the story she’s working on.” Barry presses a chaste but loving kiss to Len’s lips and nods at Mick who nods back. “Ooo. Is that the fancy wine cheese?”
“Wash your hands first,” Len says, tapping Barry on the butt with his cold gun.
Barry just laughs, shaking his head and shooting him an embarrassed look, blush spreading down his neck.
It’s then that Dick can finally see it, how the odd pairs work together. Dick smiles softly to Wally and he sees as the worry drains from his tense shoulders.
“Now, Dick,” Len says, taking a seat beside him. “I’m sure Barry and Iris’ve given you a shovel talk of their own.”
“Lenny,” Barry says, fondly exasperated.
“But just know, frostbite hurts like a bitch.”
Dick gulps, nodding silently.
“And I’m sure you wouldn’t be so pretty without any hair,” Mick says, flicking open his lighter and grinning at the flame.
“Understood,” Dick says.
Glare lightening, Len squeezes Dick’s shoulder. “Now, tell us about how you and Wally got together.”
And with that, the evening goes as normal as it can, Len and Mick making it clear that they knew who Dick was and there was no use pretending that they don’t, which opened the conversation to talk about their journey through time and Dick’s own adventures with Wally.
By the end of the night, he had a tupperware full of artisanal meats and cheeses, a promise that he’d come by soon, and all his limbs intact.
It’s only when Wally walks him out to the zeta that Dick finally lets himself freak out.
“Barry and—”
“Yup.”
“And they—”
“Uh huh. But it makes sense, right?”
“Yeah. Somehow, it does.” Dick breaks out into giggles. “Oh, Selina is going to get a kick out of this.”
“And hey. You survived the meet the family.”
“Barely.”
“No, seriously. They loved you.”
“Well, I love you. And I think they could tell.”
Wally kisses him, smiling against his lips. “Sap.”
Dick laughs. “Wait. I meant to ask. Who was the girl in the pictures with Len and Mick?”
“Oh, that’s Mick’s daughter. She’s technically an anachronism but Stein’s got his own anachronistic daughter so they’d be huge hypocrites if they did anything about Lita.”
“...huh. You Flashes and your damn time travel.”
“Hey!”