Archive of Our Own ^beta

(ALI has created the group “The Captaincy Group”)

Ali: Wellness check, everyone 😊

PrideofScotland: you sound like Milly now

Captain: hello everybody! this chat was a great idea from us

Ali: what do you MEAN?! This was MY idea 

PrideofScotland: huh?

JoeyG: i honestly thought this was Robbo's idea

EgyptianKing: same 

Ali: I thought that I'd start this chat as a way for us to communicate when we don't have the time and space for an official captaincy meeting

Ali: ALSO, this chat is a safe space to talk, share, vent, or anything, without judgment (unless you are really being a jerk, in which case we will call you out on it)

Captain: as the captain, I say that we need better chat names than just our names

Captain: at least for this chat

EgyptianKing: I'll stick with mine, I like it

PrideofScotland: me too!

Ali: I don't know...i like mine

JoeyG: I could do with a switch

PrideofScotland: hold on, i'll send you two some ideas, but you gotta use them

JoeyG: it can't be too bad

Ali: sounds good!

(ALI changed their name to THEWALLOFTEDDYBEARS#1 🥰🤗🐇)

(JOEYG changed their name to NONNEWTONIANDEFENDER#2💪)

TheWallofTeddyBears#1🥰🤗🐇: okay...long name

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: I LOVE IT

PrideofScotland: it's 'cause you're a wall, but you're a huge softy

PrideofScotland: and Joey, yours is 'cause you've played in every single defense position by now

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: IT'S PERFECT

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: FIRST GOAL INCOMING!!!!

TheWallofTeddyBears#1🥰🤗🐇: mind if I shorten mine, Robbo?

PrideofScotland: fiiiiiiine

(THEWALLOFTEDDYBEARS#1 🥰🤗🐇) changed their name to KEEPER#1 🥰🤗🐇)

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: okay, I can work with this!

Captain: I still prefer your hug-dot-gov one

PrideofScotland: yeah, that was legendary

EgyptianKing: what did you call us for, Ali?

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: I need to talk with you guys, and since I get anxious confronting face-to-face, i thought this would be a good idea

PrideofScotland: of course!

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: we promise not to interrupt

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: thanks, guys

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: okay, here goes...

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: Ever since the captaincy group got shook up back in 2023, I've spent most of my time taking care of people

Captain: and you're good at it!

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: Yeah, and I LIKE taking care of people!

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: But it's hard to keep doing it

EgyptianKing: oh, if only I could hug people all day and still be considered useful

EgyptianKing: you think YOU have it hard? i'm the team IDOL!

EgyptianKing: my face is on practically every team window shop, website, and social media account 

EgyptianKing: i literally have to be perfect every time, otherwise everybody calls for me to be benched

Captain: you don’t have to be perfect, you just have to score 🙄

EgyptianKing: “just have to score” like it’s SO EASY

EgyptianKing: Slot called me for another private meeting, and I’m guessing that means I’m BENCHED for Tuesday’s game

PrideofScotland: I get that, Momo 🫤 it's the same way in Scotland with everybody expecting me to drag us through tournaments

PrideofScotland: but you talk about the bench like it's not the place I've been relegated to

PrideofScotland: benching is frustrating, BUT it gives you time to think and see things differently, yenno

PrideofScotland: I've actually IMPROVED since I started getting benched because I had time to analyse what's my best strategy

EgyptianKing: but I don’t NEED a new strategy, I need a GOAL

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: WOW, the THIRD-HIGHEST GOALSCORER on the team needs a goal 😑

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: if i got ONE GOAL, i would be so happy

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: but I don’t even play, not even when Virgil and/or Ibou are out of form

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: and when it comes to the captaincy union, I feel like I’m invisible

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: I know how that feels 🙁

PrideofScotland: that’s not true!

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: you barely consult me for any big captaincy decisions

Captain: because ever since you became captain, we haven’t had that many big decisions to make 😅

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: that’s true...

PrideofScotland: plus, the academy boys listen to you more because you’ve been here a long time and can relate to them!

EgyptianKing: if I wasn’t already “Mr. Gym”, you could have that title, because you always work hard in the gym

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: your patience and team spirit are unrivalled, and you always try to do something when you’re put on

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: i know it’s hard to believe it sometimes, but know that you ARE VISIBLE!!!

PrideofScotland: and the next time you play, you’re going to get that goal we’ve been waiting for and you’ll be in all the papers 😁

Captain: maybe in the Chelsea game?

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: you know what? YOU’RE RIGHT

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: FRICK YOU CHELSEA LET’S GOOOOOOOO

PrideofScotland: YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH

EgyptianKing: LET’S GOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: speaking of games in london...

Captain: we have to go!

PrideofScotland: huh?

Captain: it’s time for training!

PrideofScotland: yeah, let’s go!!!

EgyptianKing: you’re just looking forward to watching me lift weights, aren’t you 😏

PrideofScotland: what can I say? Mo’s FIT

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: yeah, yeah, go on about your lad 😆 you don’t have to suffer the sight of the academy boys doing push-ups 🤣🤣🤣

Captain: alright, everybody, off the chat!

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: but—

Captain: this was a great idea, Ali, really insightful talk!

PrideofScotland: yeah, I had no idea Joey G was feeling that way

NonNewtonianDefender#2💪: i was, but I feel better now because you guys reminded me how much I do!

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: That’s what teammates are for 🥰

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: now—

EgyptianKing: love you too, bro 🫶 now if you’ll excuse me, I have a date with my weights!

Keeper#1🥰🤗🐇: days of my life

Captain: and I have a date with my—

PrideofScotland: Joel 😏

Captain: 😑 TREADMILL.

(CAPTAIN, PRIDEOFSCOTLAND, EGYPTIANKING, KEEPER#1🥰🤗🐇, and NONNEWTONIANDEFENDER#2💪 are offline.)