Work Text:
Cardan Greenbriar would fit in perfectly with today’s Generation Z.
Guy-liner. Glittering jewelry. Unrelenting sass. Alcohol addiction. Pure chaos.
He was practically the patron saint of gooning.
Which is why, on one very random Tuesday, Jude and Vivi found themselves witnessing the strangest sight in Elfhame: Cardan, lounging like he owned the world, chatting away with a pink-haired human girl who’d snuck in alongside her girlfriend.
Cardan and Heather. Talking. Laughing. Bonding.
Who would’ve thought?
Somehow, it worked. They discovered they had more in common than anyone could stomach—being gay, an unhealthy obsession with art and makeup, and, bafflingly, a shared enthusiasm for mixing up cocktails that looked (and probably tasted) like swamp water.
Jude and Vivi had never been more disturbed.
But watching Cardan and Heather gleefully exchange eyeliner tips over a goblet of neon-green sludge, they couldn’t help but admit one thing:
Their little weirdos had found each other.