Work Text:
Ichiro has been teetering on the edge of a meltdown all day. Ramuda’s voice feels like it's spiking his blood pressure, Jakurai’s spoon clinking against his teacup has Ichiro considering stabbing himself in the eardrums, and Samatoki’s naturally harsh tone makes him want to dive under a blanket and not come out.
Even the very thought of having to go home and be a big brother has Ichiro feeling fidgety and restless. Samatoki shoots him a glare that puts a stop to his bouncing leg, so Ichiro takes up the less disruptive motion of picking at the loose threads on the arm of Jakurai's couch.
The meeting comes to an end all too soon. Ramuda makes Samatoki promise to say hi to Nemu for him, and then sprints after him down the hallway (followed by angry shouting and obnoxious giggling). Ichiro feels like standing up from the couch is physically painful from how badly he doesn't want to do it, but he does it anyway, getting to his feet, feeling like he's lifting up the world along with him, holding back tears from the exertion.
“Ichiro-kun. A moment?” Jakurai’s deep voice comes from behind Ichiro, and he freezes in his tracks.
Uh-oh. Jakurai must have noticed him pulling at the threads on his couch, and now he’s going to be scolded for it. The thought of sweet, kind Sensei being angry at him bursts the floodgates, and when Ichiro turns to face Jakurai, tears are already starting to overflow and drip down his cheeks.
“Ichiro-kun?” Jakurai sounds alarmed.
“I'm–I'm s-sorry, Sensei,” Ichiro manages between sobs, trying his best to keep his voice steady as he apologizes in advance of the scolding. His fingers curl and weave together in front of him and he can't look Jakurai in the eye.
“You aren't in trouble, Ichiro-kun, why are you apologizing?” Jakurai’s voice takes on a gentler tone and he takes a small step toward Ichiro with his hands raised, as if he's approaching a cornered animal. “I only wanted to make sure you're alright. I noticed you seemed distracted during the meeting.”
“I–I tried to pay attention, Sensei, I'm s-sorry,” the words tumble out before Ichiro can stop them, his voice sounding high-pitched and whiny to his own ears. He knows he's too old to be acting like this, but he can't help it.
Jakurai hesitates, then seems to come to a decision. He drops down to one knee in front of Ichiro so that he can look up at the boy and make eye contact with him. “Ichiro-kun? I promise I'm not mad. Would you like a hug?”
Ichiro sniffles. He looks down at Jakurai’s kind smile and slowly nods his head.
Jakurai gets back to his feet and wraps his arms around Ichiro, enveloping him in the warmth of his housecoat and the scent of spearmint and chamomile. The dam really breaks then, and Ichiro begins sobbing in earnest into Jakurai’s shoulder, wetting his turtleneck with his tears as his fists tightly grip onto Jakurai’s sleeves. Sensei just holds Ichiro gently, squeezing him against his chest, slowly rubbing circles in his back with a warm, firm hand.
Jakurai had planned on trying to ask Ichiro what was wrong, but he gets the sense Ichiro doesn't want to talk about his feelings right now, so he focuses on comfort. When he feels Ichiro’s sobs settling down, Jakurai pulls back a bit and places his hand on top of Ichiro’s head, softly patting him. “Do you want to sit on the couch, Ichiro-kun? We can watch a movie, or anything else you'd like.”
“Um…” Ichiro averts his gaze again. He has no idea what's gotten into himself, but the way Jakurai is treating him makes his head fuzzy. “I gotta get home to my brothers…”
Jakurai keeps his smile in place, but his heart aches for poor Ichiro, so young and already so responsible. It must be weighing on him terribly to have to care for his younger brothers all the time, with no one to care for him in return. No wonder he's gotten into this age-regressed state. Jakurai tries to recall what he's read on the internet while doing his best to treat Ichiro as a distressed young child who needs attention.
“Your brothers are already asleep, aren't they?” Jakurai gently reminds Ichiro. “It's well past their bedtime. It won't make a difference if you stay here a bit longer.”
Still, Ichiro hesitates.
“What do you want, Ichiro-kun? Do you want to stay here or do you want to leave? There's no right answer, so please be honest with me.”
How should he answer? Ichiro’s scalp is tingling and all he can think about is how badly he wants to stay here with Sensei who is kind and gentle, but he can't. He shouldn't. But Sensei told him to be honest, so…
“Wanna stay.”
Jakurai nods. “Would you like me to call your brothers for you and let them know?”
The question shocks Ichiro into silence. Can he do that? Is that allowed? Can he let Jakurai talk to his brothers instead of him? Well, he offered, so it's probably fine, right? Ichiro hesitates a moment longer, then nods emphatically.
Jakurai smiles and gets out his cell phone, pulling up his contacts and calling the older one, Jiro. He answers after only one ring, so he probably wasn't asleep after all. How rebellious, Jakurai thinks, amused.
“Hello?”
“Jiro-kun? It's Jakurai. Did I wake you?”
Ichiro watches Sensei with wide eyes, still clinging to his sleeves.
“No, I was just–um, I mean, I wasn't asleep yet.”
“Ichiro has had a long day and isn't feeling well. Is it alright if he spends the night at my apartment?”
“Nii-chan is sick?” Jiro’s voice is full of worry.
“No, nothing like that,” Jakurai reassures him as Ichiro starts fidgeting again, trying to act like he isn't listening to the call, but clearly eavesdropping. Without a word, Jakurai grabs a small metal object from his nearby bookshelf and hands it to Ichiro.
It's a model airplane with a propeller that really spins, and it immediately does the trick of capturing Ichiro's attention. He flicks the propeller, watching in fascination as it spins and slows to a halt, then flicking it again.
Jakurai turns his attention back to the phone. “Ichiro-kun is very tired, and I'm worried he may fall asleep on the train home. I would feel more comfortable if he stayed here, that's all. He's perfectly fine.”
“Oh…” Jiro doesn't sound entirely convinced, but since Jakurai is a responsible adult with a real job, perhaps Jiro realizes he can be trusted. “That's okay then. I already brushed my teeth and locked up and stuff. Tell him to bring breakfast when he comes home in the morning!”
Jakurai chuckles. “I will, Jiro-kun. Please get some sleep. Good night.”
He hangs up, then turns back to Ichiro with a smile. “See? Your brothers will be fine, so it's alright if you sleep over.”
“We're having a sleepover?” Ichiro feels giddy all of a sudden, lighter, like a weight’s been lifted from his shoulders.
“Indeed. We can stay up a bit longer if you'd like, or you can go to sleep now. I'll let you have my bed.”
“I wanna stay up!”
Ichiro heads for the sofa with a spring in his step, flying the toy airplane over his head and bringing it down for a landing on the arm of the couch, making sound effects to go with.
Jakurai fetches a pack of colored pencils and a few coloring books from a drawer in the kitchen. He’d started keeping some things around to entertain children after a distant cousin dropped by with her toddler a few years back, but Jakurai hasn't really had any visitors who would make use of them since then. But he remembers Ichiro mentioning once that he'd enjoyed drawing when he was younger (back when he still had time, Jakurai thinks with a tinge of sadness) so maybe he'll enjoy coloring a bit.
Ichiro looks up from the toy airplane when Jakurai places the coloring supplies down on the coffee table, and immediately slides down to sit on the floor next to the table so he can look at them closer, spreading them out and looking at all the covers. Knowing Ichiro, Jakurai expects him to go for one of a couple of anime-themed books, but to his surprise, Ichiro grabs one with realistic pictures of animals.
“Are these for me?”
Wide heterochromatic eyes stare up at Jakurai like a puppy begging for a treat, and it's so cute it makes Jakurai want to laugh. “Yes, Ichiro-kun, I brought them for you. Please enjoy.”
“Wow, thank you!”
Ichiro flips through the book of animals until he finds a drawing of some kind of bird landing on a branch, wings spread. He grabs a handful of bright colors from the colored pencil box and starts giving the bird lime green feathers.
It's incredible how much Ichiro’s mood seems to have improved from just a few minutes ago, Jakurai thinks. Is it because he's being allowed to act like a child? If that's all it takes, Jakurai is more than happy to humor him.
“Um…” Ichiro looks up at Jakurai, twirling his pencil with both hands. “Do you wanna color too?”
Of course, Ichiro always goes out of his way to make sure everyone around him feels included, a trait that must simply be in his nature. Jakurai smiles and sits down on the couch. “Sure, I’ll join you.”
He picks out a coloring book of sea creatures and flips through until he finds a sea turtle, then grabs a couple shades of green to get started.
For a long time, the two of them silently color at Jakurai’s coffee table, Ichiro with his fantastically colorful bird and Jakurai with his less colorful turtle. Every now and again, Jakurai steals a glance at Ichiro to see if he's still having a good time, so he notices quickly when Ichiro goes from fully concentrating to barely able to keep his eyes open.
“Ichiro-kun, are you tired?”
“No,” Ichiro answers quickly, trying to pretend his head wasn’t just drooping down toward his neck.
Jakurai doesn't want to push Ichiro’s mood, so he just hums and they both go back to coloring. Not a few minutes later, Jakurai hears a soft snore from Ichiro's side of the table, and he looks over to see the boy has fallen asleep sitting up, head lolling to the side and colored pencil still clutched in his hand.
Smiling warmly, Jakurai gently takes the pencil out of Ichiro's hand, then with some effort, manages to scoop Ichiro up into his arms. As a growing teen, Ichiro is far from light, but Jakurai’s reserve of strength from days past allows him to carry him easily to the bedroom anyway.
He lays Ichiro down in his bed and carefully tucks him in, patting his head once more for good measure. But as Jakurai turns to leave, he feels a tugging at his sleeve, and he looks back to see a half-asleep Ichiro clinging to him.
“Um…Sensei…can you sleep with me?”
Jakurai hesitates. His queen-sized bed would probably hold the two of them just fine, but with both of them being above average height and limb length, it may be a little too cozy.
“I promise I won't kick or steal the blanket,” As if sensing his apprehension, Ichiro pleads up at Jakurai with those big mismatched eyes.
Jakurai realizes suddenly that Ichiro must have been used to sharing a bed with his brothers as a child, and maybe even the other kids at the orphanage, before they moved into the apartment they live in now. All the brothers have their own rooms now, but how long did Ichiro go without sleeping alone? It might be cruel to try and force him to do that right now.
“Alright, Ichiro-kun, I'll stay. But you have to do something for me first.”
Suddenly, Ichiro's face is alert and determined, and he nods decisively. “I will, Sensei! What is it?”
“You must brush your teeth and put on pajamas.”
“Okay!” Ichiro jumps out of bed, but a second later, he stops in his tracks.
“Whats the matter?”
“Um…I don't have that stuff with me.”
Ah, whoops. The reality of an impromptu sleepover, Jakurai supposes. He quickly gets out a spare set of pajamas for Ichiro to wear (red, his favorite color, which he seems very excited about), and gives him an extra toothbrush from his stash under the sink. After confirming Ichiro doesn't need help dressing himself, Jakurai lets him have the bathroom, and goes back to his room to quickly change into his own sleepwear. He lies down in bed and gets out the nonfiction book he's been chipping away at to quietly read for a bit.
“I brushed my teeth!” comes the chipper voice from the doorway a few minutes later, marking Ichiro's return. Jakurai looks up from his book to the charming sight of Ichiro in bright red pajamas that are a size too big for him, grinning wide enough to show off his sparkling teeth.
“Good job, Ichiro-kun,” Jakurai praises him with a smile and pats the bed beside him, and Ichiro takes a running jump to land heavily on the soft mattress. It seems he's full of energy again, Jakurai thinks, although it will probably disappear the second he stops moving.
Ichiro pulls himself up close to Jakurai, clinging to his arm and looking over his shoulder.
“What are you reading, Sensei?”
“Hmm?” Jakurai closes the book to show the cover and title, reading it aloud as he traces his finger over the strokes of the Kanji. “A colleague of mine wrote it, and she asked me to leave a review once I've finished.”
“Can you read it to me?”
What a delight to see young people interested in nonfiction! “I'd be happy to, Ichiro-kun.”
Jakurai finds an earlier section of the book where the author shares an anecdote about her childhood dog. The book itself is a self-help book about strengthening interpersonal relationships, which he worries might be a bit heavy to read to a child before bed, but maybe it will be boring enough to put Ichiro to sleep?
Indeed, he doesn't get more than one full page into the chapter before Ichiro is a dead weight on Jakurai’s arm, snoozing softly but still clinging tightly even in his sleep. Jakurai strokes his hair and kisses the very top of Ichiro’s head, then reaches over him to click off the lamp. Tomorrow, they should probably talk about all this, but tonight they can sleep. They've both earned it.