Work Text:
“Did you love Champ?”
The question surprised Waverly. She and Nicole were lounging around on the couch in Nicole’s apartment, wasting away an afternoon with whatever romantic comedy was playing on a cable channel.
Waverly lifted her head off Nicole’s legs and looked at her. She wasn’t expecting that question.
“You don’t have to answer that,” Nicole said. “Obviously. I was just wondering.”
“No, it’s fine. Just a bit out of the blue,” Waverly said, now sitting up more. “I did. I didn’t anymore by the time we broke up, but we were together for a really long time. I loved him at some point, sure.”
Nicole looked…something. She asked the question, she must’ve known it would’ve been answered.
Waverly saw Nicole’s bit of discomfort and continued.
“When we got together, it made me feel normal,” Waverly said. “It made me feel like I fit in, like I wasn’t the girl without parents or with the crazy sister or the girl who was weird or different or whatever. Being with Champ made me more like everyone else, like I always had someone to go out with or a place to be or something to do. I think I loved him for that.”
Waverly saw Nicole look more comfortable but she kind of didn’t care how Nicole reacted to this. If Nicole had reacted more viscerally, or less so, Waverly would’ve kept going in the same way. Everything that she was saying felt like it needed to be said.
“So, yeah, I was young and I wasn’t particularly happy but I wasn’t unhappy. I did love him for a while, in a way,” Waverly said. “And he’s not a bad guy, exactly. He just never really stopped being that guy in high school, the guy who’d goof around all day and do rodeos on weekends. And flirt with other girls. And never volunteer to be designated driver. And have me do his laundry for him.”
Nicole let out a little laugh of disbelief at that. “Boy-man,” she said quietly, recounting their first conversation.
Waverly blushed. “Okay, Champ wasn’t the best boyfriend the world has ever seen. But he was…comfortable. Like I said, I felt normal. I really thought that we would’ve stayed together and gotten married and had kids and stayed in Purgatory forever.”
“You don’t want those things?”
“With Champ? No,” Waverly laughed, sensing the bit of panic in Nicole’s voice. “I don’t want to be complacent like that anymore. I would’ve done all that with Champ because it was something I was supposed to do, not because I wanted it or because I loved him.”
“Is he the only person you’ve ever been in love with?”
Waverly squared herself in front of Nicole. She wasn’t going to look away, but Nicole did. Nicole knew that that was not the fairest thing to ask, knowing that the only other person Waverly had ever been in a real relationship with was right in front of her.
“’In love’ is a strong phrase,” Waverly said.
Nicole’s face fell, only the tiniest bit though. They both knew what sort of answer Nicole had been angling for and Nicole had the decency to conceal her disappointment. She had promised to not try to force Waverly to be someone she wasn’t, and that included trying to get her to say things she didn’t mean. So, Nicole didn’t want Waverly to see her disappointment. She didn’t want to guilt or force Waverly into anything, she just wanted to have this conversation.
“It is,” Nicole said, voice taking on a congenial tone, wanting to lighten the mood and give Waverly an out.
“Too strong for the likes of Champ,” Waverly continued, not backing down and ignoring the out offered to her. “But maybe not for some other people that I’ve known.”
“Oh?” Nicole’s voice was softer than her typical speaking voice and higher pitched, too. This was a turn she wasn’t expecting.
Waverly nodded, sure of herself. “Davey Thompson.”
“Davey Thompson.” Nicole’s repetition of the name sounded like a concession, and admission of defeat or at least surrender.
“Yup,” Waverly said. “The class stud in year four. Everyone had a crush on him but he sat with me at lunch that whole year.”
Nicole’s expression was a mix of relief, amusement, and a hint of infuriation. “You’re joking with me.”
“No way, babe,” Waverly said. “All the teachers said we’d end up married one day. We spent all of recess together, too.”
“What happened with Davey Thompson?” Nicole was smirking, giving this tale the inflated amount of importance and gravitas that Waverly was giving it.
“We had to do a project with a partner and I wanted to do it on the Maya, but he wanted to do it on the Aztec so he went to work with someone else,” Waverly explained. “Elise Bartucci.”
“Not Elise Bartucci!”
Waverly nodded, faking a forlorn look. “And it broke my tiny nine-year-old heart. I ended up doing my project with Chrissy, and that’s how we became friends.”
“All’s well that ends well, then.”
Waverly nodded. “Yeah.”
There was a little silence. Nicole looked content to stay in it, taking Waverly’s little divergence to mean that no, she hadn’t loved anyone else, and Nicole accepted that. She felt a little bad about asking in the first place, letting her confidence (which, she admitted to herself in times like this, was probably just a thinly veiled lack of impulse control) do the talking without much forethought. Nicole definitely wanted the answer to that question, but maybe it wasn’t something Waverly was willing to put a definite answer on, any way that the answer went.
Waverly watched Nicole and knew that Nicole was probably waiting for her to say something or do something or otherwise move the interaction forward. She also knew well enough to guess that her inner monologue was something about letting Waverly take her time and not rushing her.
But Waverly didn’t feel rushed.
“I love you,” she said, simply. She said it so simply that Nicole didn’t immediately react, so Waverly questioned if she actually said it at all.
Then, Nicole’s lips twitched upward in the corners, then were forced into a concerned frown. “Wave, I’m sorry, I didn’t want to make you feel like you needed to say that-.”
“You didn’t,” Waverly said. “I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, about our relationship and my past relationships and I know this is different. And I know that I love you, Nicole.”
Nicole grinned, wide as Waverly’s ever seen her smile.
Waverly loved a lot of things about Nicole’s smile – the way her eyes lit up, the way her happiness seemed to radiate from her grin to her whole body, and good god those dimples.
“I love you, too, Waverly,” Nicole said. She sat up, so that she wasn’t lying back anymore. She was sitting in front of Waverly. She was looking at her, taking it all in. This woman, this person who is basically made of sunshine, bad puns, and a hell of a backbone, loves her. Nicole knew she was a goner for Waverly the second she saw her, but she didn’t ever think she’d be so lucky as to have Waverly love her back.
Nicole pulled Waverly closer to her and kissed her. She remembered their first kiss like it was yesterday, and this felt like that – excited and new and a bit scared but ultimately so, so right.
Waverly meant it when she said that “in love” was maybe too strong a phrase for Champ. Maybe it was in a juvenile way, but she did love him and she does care about him, even now. But what she ever felt for him was nothing like what she felt for Nicole. Nicole, both as a person and as an idea, terrified Waverly. The idea of caring about someone that much and being so invested in them, in having that much at stake terrified Waverly. The idea of being that far out of her comfort zone but also feeling so at home was terrifying. But, it taught Waverly that “scary” and “wrong” weren’t synonyms. Everything with Nicole felt right and exhilarating and like the best. Waverly knew that yeah, she’d loved people before, but how she loved Nicole was different.
Waverly was different. She wasn’t who she was when she was with Champ. Getting with Nicole wasn’t a rebound action from Champ, it was a hard turn off the beaten, prescribed path onto a road with an unknown, hopefully happy, end but definitely a thrilling journey. It was real and it made her heart race. It was something she'd never experienced before, feeling that strongly about someone, but she was ready.