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The thing about Tsukishima Kei was that he didn’t know how striking he was.
It was in the rise of his cheekbones, the curve of his jaw, the soft bend of his lips as he pressed them together in thought. His eyes, hidden behind glass and thick plastic frames, flashed with something bold, calculating, and cold enough to chase a chill down Kuroo’s spine.
He received any form of compliments with a grimace and a sneer, always disbelieving and never accepting, insisting that one must have ulterior motives in order to have noticed anything positive about him. However, there was always a split-second moment when his eyes would widen a faction, his expression momentarily unguarded as kind words hit him like an open-palmed slap. His cheeks would colour like he had been hit and his breath would catch. Then, in a blink, it would dissolve back into his frosty demeanour.
“Tsukki,” Kuroo would drawl, “that was a nice block just now.”
“Tsukki, you’re very skilled at reading your opponents.”
“Yo, Tsukki, nice receive!”
He was never around Tsukki as much as he would like, he had to make those fleeting moments count when he could. Those milliseconds when Tsukki became something other than what he pretended to be. Kuroo was almost positive he was the only one that noticed it, that there was something there behind his petty insults and snappish comments thrown into a conversation like it pained him to speak to his teammates. Kuroo didn’t mind, though, it meant he could discover the treasure on his own and keep it for himself.
But, soon, his passing comments on Tsukki’s adept volleyball skills started to roll off him like a drop of water on a windowpane. They no longer held the weight they once did, he reacted less, it was normal . Kuroo had abused his power and the high he chased was no longer available to him. He had to up the dose to get the same reaction.
“Tsukki,” he tried, “I admire how cool you remain under stress.”
It worked, briefly, minutely, there was a reaction, but not one he had expected. It was better . Tsukki fumbled, his face heating up, it took him longer to regain his composure. He mumbled a ‘thanks’ and shuffled away, glancing back at Kuroo like he had grown a second head.
“You’re very patient, Tsukki, and kind to your teammates.”
“Tsukki, you’re very honest, very blunt, I like that.”
“You’re kind of funny .”
That last one had elicited a verbal response, a choked, ‘ what ’ coming only after the words had slipped past Kuroo’s smirking lips, drifted through the air, and registered in Tsukki’s whirling mind. “I appreciate a man with a good sense of sarcasm,” Kuroo continued, thrilled by the heat of Tsukki’s face and the way his lips parted in shock.
Too soon, passing compliments on Tsukki’s character were received the same as comments on his skill, and Kuroo was left grasping for something new to challenge his blonde rival. Nothing he tried worked, being accepted as simply as he would receive a chance ball: it was easy to catch and no big deal, nothing to get worked up over, his expression neutral and in control.
“It’s just Kuroo ,” he had heard Tsukki gruffly say once in passing., “none of his comments mean anything.”
Kuroo didn’t want to be just Kuroo. Kuroo didn’t want his shower of compliments to mean nothing, because to him, they meant everything. Every brief glimpse past Tsukki’s walls let him slowly piece together the puzzle that he was behind all his shields and guarded expressions. He was funny, honest, and kind. He did play the game of volleyball well enough to be worthy of endless praise. He played with calm receives and powerful blocks, competent and calculating, effectively manipulating his rivals to his gain, spiking the ball with prompt, precision, and power. All of these things and more made Tsukki up to be something Kuroo wanted to spend every waking minute and every breath he had applauding.
“Tsukki, you’re beautiful .”
The world seemed to come to a standstill, the volleyball that had been in the air hit the court with a smack and rolled away, unnoticed by everyone; no sneakers squeaked on the court floor to chase after it. The room was holding its breath.
“Pardon me?” Tsukki was the first to break the silence, not cutting through the tension, but winding it up.
“You’re beautiful ,” Kuroo’s voice had a mind of its own, his tongue would not lay still, pushing past his teeth and lips and breaking free to spill all the secret words that he thought were safe in his mind. His feet lurched and he ducked under the net, taking shaking steps towards the tall middle blocker until they stood toe-to-toe. “You’re beautiful,” he said again, “you’re amazing. Everyone in the goddamned room should feel lucky to occupy the same space as you.”
Tsukki flushed and looked down, away, he shifted his weight and cleared his throat. His voice cracked when he spoke, barely a whisper, “stop teasing me, Kuroo. It’s not funny.”
Kuroo could not stop his hands from reaching out even if he had wanted to. He brushed his fingertips against Tsukki’s chest, feeling the fabric of his shirt, then danced up to touch Tsukki’s jaw, bringing those guarded eyes back to meet his.
“You’re,” Kuroo said slowly, “beautiful.” Tsukki was struggling to regain control of the situation, Kuroo could see it in the shallow rise and fall of his shoulders as he breathed, he was shaking, his face did not lose the red flush that Kuroo had put there. “I refuse to let another moment pass without letting you know.”
“Don’t be ridiculous-”
“I refuse to stop letting you know until you believe it.”
Tsukki looked back towards his teammates and Kuroo found he didn’t care that his whole team and Tsukki’s whole team were watching the exchange, many with their mouths dropped open. It was good that they hear this, they needed to damn well be enlightened to the amazing creature that stood among them.
“You’re going to be letting me know for a very long time, then,” Tsukki flicked his eyes back to meet Kuroo’s, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth as he tried to regain his composure, to diffuse the situation with biting humour.
“I’ve got time,” Kuroo said, letting his fingers trace the shape of Tsukki’s face, “you’re so fucking beautiful.” Kuroo did not crack a smile to indicate that he was joking, he held Tsukki’s suspicious stare and he did not waver, his hands did not falter as they thread into his hair at the back of Tsukki’s head.
“You’re serious,” Tsukki breathed it out, the colour continuing to rise in his cheeks.
Kuroo nodded, “I am,” he wanted to add, ‘ let me show you how serious ,’ but his tongue chose that moment to retreat into his mouth as it went dry, his nerves finally catching up to him. He took that last shreds of his courage and tugged Tsukki forward, causing him to stumble into Kuroo’s chest and their lips met.
Tsukki gasped into his mouth and he planted his hands in the centre of Kuroo’s chest. He did not shove him away, as Kuroo was suddenly very terrified he would do, but instead curled his fingers into the fabric of Kuroo’s shirt.
It was not magical, there was no earth-shattering moment of realization, or some sort of electric shock that they both felt to signify how right the moment was. But, it was warm, chaste, and felt almost accidental. It was innocent and honest and Kuroo squeezed his eyes shut, hoping Tsukki could feel all the other words he thought since the day they first met, but could not figure out how to say.
The tension in the room snapped with the loud ‘whoop’ cried out by Hinata. The silence dissolved into words of surprise and clamour as both teams tried to figure out what was happening. Kuroo stepped away from Tsukki, who held a hand up to his mouth, eyes wide, his expression open.
The blood roared in Kuroo’s ears, frantic, realizing that he probably should not have done that. Tsukki was clearly reading his face like he would had they been standing on opposite sides of the net. He was analyzing the situation, calculating the game so far and mentally going through a list of possible next moves and outcomes. Without his guards normally high and in place, Kuroo could see cogs turning in Tsukki’s mind as he processed the situation.
“I suppose,” Tsukki said at last, “you’re pretty beautiful too.”