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Life wasn’t something he cherished like the others. Life had value, sure, but were you really worthy of it if you couldn’t defend the weak and destroy the demons which plagued this world for centuries? His life had no meaning outside of killing demons, that was what he was good at, and it was one of his only skills. He didn’t care if he died… or at least, he thought he didn’t.
The young Kamado boy was stubborn and a pestering menace, but Giyu couldn’t deny he enjoyed their eating contest, and enjoyed watching the boy get stronger and stronger. Much like the Hashira, Tanjiro had his reasons for fighting. To avenge his family, to save his sister, and to kill the demon who turned her. Slowly but surely the boy had wormed his way into Giyu’s life, and he would be lying if he said he hated it. In truth, Tanjiro was one of the first people Giyu could genuinely care about and consider a friend, although he wouldn’t admit that to anyone out loud. He reminded him of Sabito sometimes, and that hurt more than he wanted it to.
Then there was the butterfly Hashira, a woman who often teased or antagonized him, and most days he didn’t mind. He was hard on himself already, it wasn’t as if she added anything to it that wasn’t true. He sometimes found himself wanting her to tease him more, if only to hear her warm laugh and see her smile with her eyes. She always had a vein popping out of her forehead, and you could feel her anger and pain wafting off of her, so it was always a pleasant sight when she allowed herself to express genuine joy, even if it was at his expense. It was fine, so long as it was from her.
Shinobu is strong willed, intelligent and kind, but stubborn when needed. She was the only Hashira he often visited, enjoying her mansion and company, though he’d never been able to place why he felt so at peace around her. Perhaps it was the herbs she surrounded herself with? Some medicinal, some poison, all a direct tie to her and her unique scent.
He sighs, staring longingly at the walls of her mansion. If only he had some sort of excuse to visit. The last time he didn’t have a good enough excuse, Aoi gave him a look he couldn’t quite get out of his head. It was akin to judgement, but not hateful. More… concerned?
“Mr. Giyu!” Tanjiro’s elated voice calls to his left, and he turns slowly to see the young slayer jogging towards him, the biggest grin on his face. “Mr. Giyu, why are you here?” He pants as he stops just shy of him. “Are you hurt?” The genuine concern in his voice makes Giyu wince, but it was good to be cared about, or so Kanroji kept trying to tell him. He avoided her most days, not that he didn’t like her, she was just easily excitable, and loud.
“No.” He answers, looking back to the gate.
“Oh.” Tanjiro wipes at his nose with his sleeve and tilts his head. “Then, why are you here?”
Giyu inhales. Why is he here? That’s a good question, one even he didn’t have the answer to. Looking down at himself, he assesses his lack of injuries and offers another sigh. “Why are you here?’ He deflects, eyeing the gate once more.
Tanjiro frowns, placing his fingers to his chin for a moment. The kid was clever, he’d give him that, but he enjoyed prying into Hashira's life too much sometimes. “Maybe Miss Shinobu needs help with something?” He offers with a grin.
Why is he grinning so widely? Giyu eyes the boy curiously. “You could ask.” He says, tilting his head when Tanjiro frowns.
“Right…” He looks at the gate then. He stands with a hand still on his chin, his brows furrowed and lips pursed. After a moment he opens the gate, startling poor Kanao who’d been trying to open it herself.
She stares at Tanjiro wide eyed, clutching a hand to her chest as the two stare at one another.
“Oh, I’m sorry!” Tanjiro immediately apologizes, grinning with his eyes. “I was simply helping Mr. Giyu here, he wants to speak with Miss Shinobu!”
I didn’t say that, he thinks, eyeing Tanjiro as the boy rubs the back of his head.
Kanao eyes Giyu curiously, then hums. She leads the two into the mansion he’s been in more times than he can count. Some visits for aid and others… he simply liked the peace and tranquility of the mansion, nothing more.
At some point Kanao stops leading them and takes Tanjiro away, leaving Giyu to stand awkwardly outside one of Kocho’s work rooms.
“Kanao? Is that you?” Her voice stops him from turning around, his feet locked in place and unable to move as her footsteps grow closer. The door slides open, a gasp leaving her when she spots him.
“Tomioka, what brings you here?” He can hear her smile, and see her tilted head and knows how warm her eyes look.
He forces himself to turn, his body stiff as a board as his eyes land on hers. “I…” She covers her mouth when he makes a face.
“I see.” She steps aside, revealing a workbench littered with different plants, herbs and a few knives, as well as a desk in the corner littered with papers. “Come in?” She words it as a question, but he’s never been able to say no to her, so he enters. She slides the door shut behind them, her smaller frame moving quickly around him as she tidies the bench and desk. “What brings you here? Are you hurt?” She eyes him up and down as she gathers some cups, tilting her head. “No signs of injury.” She then meets his eyes, and he freezes in place.
His are simply dull blue, but hers, hers are vibrant and full of intelligence. He always froze under her gaze, and even he never knew why. Nobody else seemed as affected by her piercing stare.
“How are you sleeping?” She asks, her smile dropping.
He doesn’t sleep, or at least he rarely sleeps fully, she knows this. He tilts his head, attempting to avoid her gaze by looking out of the open window by her desk.
She makes a quiet huffing noise. “You really need to talk more, Tomioka, people might think you’re-” She pauses, humming as if choosing her words more carefully. “Well, you should talk more.” She pours tea into two cups, sprinkling some dried herbs into them along with a few drops of honey. After a moment she turns, one of her signature grins stretched across her face. “Drink.” She holds the left cup out to him and he takes it.
Her fingertips are soft and warm as they brush against his, and he can still feel the faint touch lingering as he grips his cup.
Kocho beams at him, this smile different than her previous one. There’s a faint hint of mischief mixed in.
His eyebrows move on their own as he takes her in. She so readily gave him tea, as if she were waiting for him? She is smart, and usually a few steps ahead of at least most of the Hashira, so perhaps she somehow knew he’d be coming? No, he isn’t that important, she made tea for herself and since he just so happened to be here she offered. Yes, certainly there was no other answer.
“Stop thinking so much and just drink.” She says softly, sipping her own tea as she watches him, as if he’s one of her insects.
He looks down, watching the small flower in his cup darken as it soaks up the liquid. He puts it to his lips, closing his eyes as the sweet warmth eases the aches in his back he hadn’t realized were there. He’d grown so used to ignoring himself, but Kocho always seemed to know what would help. “Thank you.” He says, taking another drink. He doesn’t catch her grin widening.
She turns away from him, moving to sit at the small table by the other open window. “Sit.” She orders, and he obeys.
He’d never been good with people, but everything felt so much easier with Kocho. She could take the lead and guide him when necessary. It’s not that he didn’t know what to do, he simply had a hard time ‘reading between the lines’, as Kocho often put it.
He lifts the cup to his lips once more, and takes one of the biscuits Kocho had set out on a plate.
Her gaze is locked outside the window, watching as the sun begins to set in the distance. “You should visit more often.” She mutters, almost as if to herself but he catches it. “The moon will be lovely tonight.” She smiles then, soft, warm and genuine. Her gaze drifts to him and he swears his heart stops, along with his hand that was bringing the cup back up for another drink. “Do you need more?” She stands without waiting for an answer and brings the kettle over. She fills his cup before setting it on a thick cloth. Hers is still mostly untouched, but he doesn’t question it as he takes another sip.
His tense muscles loosen with every drink, the warmth seeping into his joints and bones and somehow taking away the pain in his knees and lower back he hadn’t noticed. “What’s in this tea?” He asks, pulling the cup away to eye the intricate flowery designs on the outside.
Kocho smiles. “Medicine.”
Giyu frowns. “I’m not sick.”
Her grin grows and his heart skips a beat. “I know.” Her gaze drifts out the window once more and the pair fall into a comfortable silence.
How long had it been since he’d had one of her medicinal teas? She mostly dabbled in poison, and even though she helped the corps with her medicine along with the girls under her, she was always so excellent at making poisons. Most demons didn’t stand a chance against her. It was one of the many things Giyu admired about her.
Without meaning to he yawns, and Kocho’s lips quirk up at the edges. He munches on another biscuit, his own gaze drifting out the window as his thoughts wander. Memories he pushes back down, and fantastical ideas that would never come true. In their line of work, mortality rates were incredibly high, so hoping for anything more than that was out of the question.
“When was the last time you got a full night's rest?” She asks out of the blue, her gaze still locked on the setting sun.
Giyu looks down, trying to recall a time when he actually rested and didn’t just doze off from exhaustion. “Can’t recall.” He mutters, finishing his second cup.
She eyes him without turning her head. “More?”
He wipes at his eyes, fatigue beginning to creep up his spine and into his shoulders. “No.” He yawns once more, and finally notices the faint smirk on her face. “What?”
She tilts her head with a cute grin. “Nothing!”
He frowns. She had to be up to something, she never smiles this much around him. As of late she had been smiling more often, but certainly not this much. He looks back down at his cup and the leaves at the bottom of it, along with the faint residue from the honey.
The aches in his body are long gone, and left in their wake is this growing need to lay down and sleep. He meets her soft gaze. “Drugs?” He asks. If it were anyone else he would’ve drawn his sword by now, but Kocho? There was only that one time to defend the Kamado siblings, and then during training they used the wooden swords. He’d never pull his sword on her, not for this.
Her smile falters and she sighs. “You don’t sleep.” She says softly, tilting her head inquisitively. “The young Kamado boy sees you as his friend, and worries. He’s been keeping an eye on you for me.”
Is that why he was also at the gate earlier? “Is that so?” He asks, leaning back with a tired sigh. With sluggish movements he stands, nearly stumbling when his foot gets caught on the chair leg.
“Tomioka!” Kocho reaches out and grabs his arm, pulling him to her. “You can’t leave like this, you won’t make it far before you collapse.”
He can’t help himself. “Whose fault is that?” His words are slightly slurred and he frowns.
Kocho furrows her brows, a stern look spreading across her pretty face. “Sit.” He obeys, plopping down on the cot he hadn’t noticed earlier. It’s tucked against the wall and not far from the door. She moves quickly, cleaning up a few things before pulling one of the chairs over along with a small end table.
This was nowhere near where he saw his evening going when he came here earlier. Tea was to be expected, and he expected her to want his help with something, but he never would’ve guessed she’d drug him in order to help him sleep. Maybe it was another form of experiment? He might’ve been open to it had she asked. He squeezes his fists in his pants. “Why?” He looks over at her, a soft frown on his face as she scribbles something down on paper.
She meets his eyes, her gaze soft but torn. “You don’t take care of yourself, Giyu. You toss your life around as if it’s meaningless and you couldn’t care less.” She sets the paper down. “But you do care, at least when it comes to others.” She moves from the chair to the cot, sitting to his right. “Look at how you defended the Kamado siblings. I’ve always admired your kind heart.” She goes to poke at his chest but pulls back, pursing her lips. “You’re firm as well.” She says then, grinning to herself. “You were going to kill Tanjiro’s sister on that mountain, but they showed you something none of us have ever seen before, and convinced you not to kill her.” Her eyes soften around the edges. "You’re firm, but kind. You care for others even when you can’t find it in yourself to care for yourself.” She smiles once more, her eyes shut tightly. The sunset glows around the back of her head like a halo and casts them in its warm light.
He wants to tell her she’s wrong, but he knows she’s right. He is reckless and careless, and more often than not he doesn’t care if he lives or dies. His entire existence is to kill demons, and also to hate himself for his failures. If only he’d done better, Sabito wouldn’t have had to defend him and die.
Perhaps it’s his drug-addled mind that pushes him to move, but he takes Kocho’s hand in his. Her eyes widen as she watches their hands. “I could say the same for you.” He mutters.
She frowns at his words, offering him a dirty look through her eyelashes.
He looks down at their hands, and laces their fingers together. Would he have done this otherwise? Probably not, but he tries not to focus so much on what he’s doing. It hurts less when he doesn’t think. Without meaning to, he leans his head against her shoulder, inhaling and exhaling deeply as he fights himself. “Maybe we can take care of each other, even if we can’t take care of ourselves.” He mumbles, yawning once more as sleep begins to overtake him.
Kocho smiles softly, tears brimming at the corners of her eyes as she fights back the memories of her sister. She would make that demon pay, no matter the cost. “I can work with that.” She says, looking over to see him fast asleep.
His breaths come out slow and even, his chest rising and falling slowly, his face finally reflecting his proper age. She smiles, carting one of her hands through his hair and ruffling it slightly. Neither of them were perfect, both had their pain and trauma to deal with that held them back from so much, but maybe Tomioka was right. Perhaps they could take care of each other, and maybe that would be enough.