Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

9/14/25        13:07

[PyroSycthe Made a Group Chat]

[PyroSycthe Named the Group Chat: Forensics 101]

[PyroSycthe added Smajor! And OrangeOwen to the Chat]

[PyroSycthe] sooooo thought we needed a chat for this project….

[Smajor!] and this is why your not the smart one!

[OrangeOwen Renamed the Chat: Wish We were Dead!]

[Smajor!] hah! imagine wanting to die

[Smajor] couldnt be me

[OrangeOwen] says the one whos retaken this class like six times

[Smajor!] they were all different classes

[Smajor!] this is your second time reataking the SAME CLASS

[Smajor!] theres a diffrence

[PyroSycthe] sorry owen but hes got a point

[OrangeOwen] i hate it here

[PyroSycthe] we know

[Smajor!] we know honey

9/15/25       03:39

[OrangeOwen] wait what project?

[Smajor!] the one Professor Prowess assigned and gave us groups for?

[OrangeOwen] i slept through that class…

[Smajor!] and this is why im their favorite!

[PyroSycthe] pretty sure thats Avid lol

[PyroSycthe] also why ar e you guys uyp?

[Smajor!] awwww the baby needs a bedtime huh?

[OrangeOwen] you’ll learn why

[PyroSycthe] IM NOOT A BABY!

[Smajor!] your spelling errors say otherwise

[PyroScythe] says the one who cant captilize

[Smajor] you dont either?

[OrangeOwen] stfu im trying to finish the chemistry assiment

9/16/25      15:34

[PyroSycthe] would now be a good time to ask if we can meet up for da project?

[Smajor!] get me a vanilla latte with a pump of carmel and two shots of esspresso

[OrangeOwen] i have like fifteen minuetes left in this class

[PyroSycthe] is that a no?

[Smajor!] if you get me the latte its a yes

[Smajor!] also add a dash of cinimon and make sure they use almond milk

[Smajor] dairy milk gives me acne

[PyroSythe]….

[OrangeOwen] i knew something was up with this guy

9/16/25      19:58

[PyroSycthe] [1 Attachment]

[PyroSycthe] heres the doc!

[Smajor!] and here i thought we werent gonna be nerds

[OrangeOwen] how did iyou prep to send that so fast?

[Smajor!] only nerds use google

[PyroSycthe] wdym

[Smajor!] use microsoft and firefox 

[OrangeOwen] we saw eachother like five minutes ago?

[PyroSycthe] well i wanted to get it for ya so we can finsih our parts

[OrangeOwen] *face palm*

[Smajor!] like i said

[Smajor!] baby

[PyroSycthe] im not a baby??

9/17/25    00:13

[OrangeJuice] he means that your a newbie

9/17/25     07:23

[PyroScythe] i still dont get it

[PyroScythe] and why were you up so early

[Smajor!] and why are you texting at such a un earlthy hour

[PyroSycthe] i have class in an hour?

[OrangeOwen] oop

[Smajor!] lol

[PyroSycthe] what?

[Smajor!] wanna bet on how long hell last 

[OrangeOwen] 15 cents on two months

[Smajor!] ill give him two weeks

[PyroSycthe] why you betting on me?]

[Smajor] also your one of those nerds that types out the number?

[OrangeOwen] ye

9/17/25      12:45

[PyroSycthe] wanna have lunch togeth?

[Smajor!] cant in class

[OrangeOwen] your not you just went inot the starbucks across the street

[Smajor!] le gasp

[Smajor!] are you spying on me?

[PyroSycthe] could have said no ive got other plans

[Smajor!] and i still have class

[Smajor!] being late is fashinable you know

[OrangeOwen] you dating anyone?

[Smajor!] i havea boyfriend back home fu

[OrangeOwen] thanks you just got me ten bucks

[PyroSycthe] fine guess i’ll eat lunch by myslef

9/18/25      18:47

[PyroSycthe] how possible is it to do another project meeting tonight?

[Smajor!] cant party

[OrangeOwen] is it the one avid’s hosting

[Smajor!] ye

[OrangeOwen] cool

[PyroSycthe] schooling should come first

[Smajor!] ive said it once let me say it agian

[OrangeOwen] baby

[Smajor!] you stole my line

9/18/25       22:34

[Smajor!] pice of adcice 

[Smajor!] avids partys suck

[Smajor!] no wine and cheap beer

[Smajor!] plus his house is blegh

[OrangeOwen] i dont go to partys

[OrangeOwen] noted

[PyroSycthe] guess your wishing that we studied instead

[Smajor!] nah

9/19/25     02:23

[PyroSycthe] so uh… 

[Smajor!] is somone having their gay awakining. 

[OrangeOwen] i dont think thats it

[PyroSycthe] i think im going to cry

[Smajor!] good

[PyroSycthe] anyone have Mathmatics: How to Use?

[Smajor!] with who?

[OrangeOwen] ye

[PyroSycthe] does anyone have the answers to the most recent asignment

[PyroSycthe] Dr. Cruche

[Smajor!] oh im doing that assingment rn

[OrangeOwen] I do it with Alien

[Smajor!] oh i love her

[PyroSycthe] who?

[PyroSycthe] so you dont have the answers

[Smajor!] someone’s growing up

[OrangeOwen] if you have a morning class your gonna wish you were dead

[Smajor!] couldnt be me

[PyroSycthe] stfu im going ot have a panic attack

[OrangeOwen] welcome to collage

[Smajor!] welcome to collage lol

9/19/25    23:21

[Smajor!] so how was your dayyyyy

[OrangeOwen] i slept all day

[Smajor!] i wasnt talking to you

[OrangeOwen] now i wish my dream came true

[OrangeOwen] before you ask i dreapt that you died

[OrangeOwen] it was awsome

[PyroSycthe] shush im trying to sleep

[Smajor!] this early?

[OrangeOwen] hes a newbie

[Smajor!] i thought he would have elarned otherewise from this morning

[OrangeOwen] nope

[Smajor!] lol

[OrangeOwen] gtg 

[Smajor!] geez everyones lame

9/20/25       03:42 

[OrangeOwen] ik

9/20/25      08:41

[PyroScythe] gang someone tell me why proffeser kendricks sent out a emal it cancel class thrity mins before it started?

[OrangeOwen] @Smajor!

[PyroSycthe] huh?

[OrangeOwen] @Smajor!

[Smajor!] what 

[Smajor!] a man needs his beauty sleep

[Smajor!] how dare you wake me

[OrangeOwen] read up

[PyroSycthe] what can soemone just tell me?

9/20/25       20:25

[Smajor!] just collected my winnings from the bet

[Smajor!] now as for proffesser kendricks

[Smajor!] its confermined 

[Smajor!] he and docor crazy pants whats his face are sexing

[OrangeOwen] dang it i bet on Carver

[Smajor!] im pretty sure its a threesome but no ones taking the bet

[OrangeOwen] really?

[Smajor!] ya but the bet my floor said that we can’t place poly bets

[Smajor!] homophobic i tell you 

[OrangeOwen] i’ll take the bet tahat doctor Ableston is a side piece

[Smajor!] sweet 

[Smajor!] talk around and see if anyone else wants the bet

[PyroSycthe] do you guys often make bets?

[Orange Owen] ight.

[Smajor!] well duh

[Smajor!] how else is college supposed to be entertaining?

[Smajor!] void your a baby

[OrangeOwen] i started last year.

[OrangeOwen] tis a good side hustle

[PyroSycthe]….

[PyroSycthe] i regret going to colledge

[Smajor!] good 

[OrangeOwen] you get used to it

[Smajor!] now if you’ll excuse me 

[Smajor!] daddy needs some new shoes

Chapter Text

9/21/25         12:34

[PyroSycthe added ShelbyGrace to Wish We Were Dead]

[ShelbyGrace changed ShelbyGrace ’s name to ~~Shell~~BY~~]

[~~Shell~~BY~~ changed PyroSycthe ‘s name to Pyre]

[Smajor!] pyro i just want to talk

[~~Shell~~BY~~ changed OrangeOwen ‘s name to Osquared]

[~~Shell~~BY~~ changed Smajor! ‘s name to Gay Fashion Queen]

[Osquared] why the name change?

[Pyre] shelby was added to our group!

[Gay Fashion Queen] your dead

[~~Shell~~BY~~] SCOTT MY BESTIE!

[Gay Fashion Queen]SHELBY MY BESTIE

[Gay Fashion Queen]pyro i wanted to add her so ya your dead

[~~Shell~~BY~~] anyways yall need a new name change why do ya wish you were dead?

[Gay Fashion Queen] its just owen and it kinda fits the class you know?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] fair

[Pyre] also! the project is due this weekend instead of next….

[Gay Fashion Queen] dead you hear me?

9/21/25        21:23

[Osquared] whyis he dead

[~~Shell~~BY~~] did you guys know that aparently a human rectum can fit a racoon?

[Pyre] i think im going to start regretting my life decisions

[Gay Fashion Queen] casue he added shelby before me

[~~Shell~~BY~~] he gets possisive

[~~Shell~~BY~~] he does it to his boyfriend too

[Osquared] you know his boyfriend???

[~~Shell~~BY~~] well duh

[Gay Fashion Queen] where did you learn that shelby?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] tumblr

[Gay Fashion Queen] you mean that crazy site that you speand literal hours on?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] yep!

[Pyre] can you guys stop so i can finish my work?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] procrastinate in favor of autistic special intrests

[Osquared] just dont do it

[Gay Fashion Queen] sleep with the professor

[Pyre]….

[Pyre] all of those are terible sugestions

[Osquared] do you know what the class is graded on 

[Pyre] no

[Osquared] well find out alot of other classes have the only requimernt be attendence

[Gay Fashion Queen] or just fail

[~~Shell~~BY~~] or jsut sleep with the teacher

[Gay Fashion Queen] seee

[Gay Fashion Queen] someone gets it

9/22/25         02:54

[Osquared] i think thats the longest tex t thread we’ve ever had

[~~Shell~~BY~~] really

[Osquared liked a message]

[~~Shell~~BY~~] geez you guys are lame

[Gay Fashion Queen] more like i dont want to associate myslef with losers 

[~~Shell~~BY~~] even me

[Gay Fashion Queen] of course not 

[Gay Fashion Queen] your a winner through and through

[Pyre] i think we need to talk about your bedtimes

[~~Shell~~BY~~] why

[Gay Fashion Queen] baby

[Osquared] their normal 

[Pyre]…

[Pyre] no their not

9/23/25       13:08

[Pyre] we need to do another study session

[Gay Fashion Queen] another one

[Gay Fashion Queen] weve already done two

[~~Shell~~BY~~] dm me th doc and ill do my part

[Osquared] ya we dont need any more session for atleasty a week

[Pyre] do you want to fail

[Osquared] idc

[~~Shell~~BY~~] i write my notes into fanfiction

[Gay Fashion Queen] i read shelby’s notes

[~~Shell~~BY~~] plus procastination is the key to sucsess

[~~Shell~~BY~~] SCOTT YOU READ MY FANFICTION???

[Gay Fashion Queen] ofcccccc

[Gay Fashion Queen] best pieces of litutature ive ever read

9/23/25       15:23

[Osquared] shelby writes fanfiction

[~~Shell~~BY~~] yep!

[~~Shell~~BY~~] [1 attachment] 

[~~Shell~~BY~~] heres mynotes for the class we shared

[Gay Fashion Queen] shelby nooo

[Gay Fashion Queen] they dont deserve it

[Pyre] guys im getting weird looks stfu

[Osquared] oh hes in class

[~~Shell~~BY~~] who has class at three

[Gay Fashion Queen] pyro

[Osquared] pyro

[Gay Fashion Queen] he also has a class at 8

[~~Shell~~BY~~] ok thats kinda weird

[Gay Fashion Queen] am

[~~Shell~~BY~~]…

[~~Shell~~BY~~] pyro buddy we need to talk

9/23/25       21:46

[Pyre] just scrolled up

[Pyre] still doesnt explain why Shelbly lectured me

[~~Shell~~BY~~ changed Pyre’s name to Idiotic Bird]

[Idiotic Bird] why?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] because your silly

[Gay Fashion Queen changed ~~Shell~~BY~~’s name to QUEEN]

[QUEEN] awww thanks scott

[QUEEN] but

[QUEEN changed QUEEN’s name to ~~Shell~~BY~~]

[~~Shell~~BY~~] pisses people off more

[Gay Fashion Queen] ive taught you so well

9/24/25        00:00

[Osquared] @Idiotic Bird

[Osquared] deserved

9/24/25         04:55

[~~Shell~~BY~~] i know it was my idea

[Osquared] you deserve the QUEEN NAme

[~~Shell~~BY~~] awwww thank you

[~~Shell~~BY~~] but this na,me pisses popel off more

[Osquared] how?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] *wink*

[Gay Fashion Queen] i’m pretty sure shes a withc

[Idiotic Bird] four in the morning now? 

[Idiotic Bird] guys cmon

9/24/25             23:43

[Osquared] hold shes a withc?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] scott likes to think so

[~~Shell~~BY~~] but really i just piss people off

[Idiotic Bird] gang what is the answer to x = -b plus or minens the square root of b squared mines 4ac divided by 2a?

[Gay Fashion Queen] honey i finished the math requirment my first year 

[Gay Fashion Queen] i dont know

[Osquared] i havent doen math yet 

[~~Shell~~BY~~] abraham lincon

[Gay Fashion Queen] stopped slaverly sadly

[Osquared]…

[~~Shell~~BY~~ laughed at a message] 

[Idiotic Bird]….

[Idiotic Bird] i’ll go ask the intenet

9/25/25             00:02

[Osquared] hehe funny date

[Idiotic Bird] alreat thats it ive got to ask

[Idiotic Bird] are we gonna ignore scotts syaing that slabvery was good

[~~Shell~~BY~~] one he never said it was good

[~~Shell~~BY~~] two hes gonn get pissed at ya when hes doen with his two hour buble bath

[~~Shell~~BY~~] three that isnt the worse thing hes said

[Osquared] two hour buble bath?

[Idiotic Bird] thats the part you find concernign?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] he once plotte the murder of my ex and woud have gone through with it

[~~Shell~~BY~~] the ontly thing that stopped him was the fact my ex moved

[Osquared] cities?

[Osquared] weak

[~~Shell~~BY~~] continents

[~~Shell~~BY~~] he would have still gone but the trip would have been during his aniversery 

[Idiotic Bird] i hate it here

9/25/25             03:42

[~~Shell~~BY~~] he jsut read the chat

[~~Shell~~BY~~] and looked at me and said

[~~Shell~~BY~~] ‘i still have the plans’

[~~Shell~~BY~~] ‘i also know where he lives’

[~~Shell~~BY~~] ‘all we need is an allibi’

[Osquered] i volenteer as tribute

[~~Shell~~BY~~] hes also laughing at pyro

[~~Shell~~BY~~] has been for the past three mins

[Gay Fashion Queen] hes in for such a rude awakening

9/25/25          6:34

[Idiotic Bird] WASUP *******

[~~Shell~~BY~~] WHY ARE YOU UP SO EARLY

[Gay Fashion Queen] he believes in early bird gets the worm

[~~Shell~~BY~~] for an eight oclock class?

[Idiotic Bird] actually i also have a seve thirty class some days

[Idiotic Bird] includeing today

[Osquared kicked Idiotic Bird from the Group]

[~~Shell~~BY~~] OWEN

[~~Shell~~BY~~ added PyroSycthe to the Group]

[~~Shell~~BY~~ changed PyroSycthe’s name to Idiotic Bird]

[~~Shell~~BY~~] rember it idiot

[Idiotic Bird] are you talking ot me

[~~Shell~~BY~~] no the person i piss off

9/25/25       12:32

[~~Shell~~BY~~] does anyne know if proffesser callahan is in a relationship

[Osquared] i thought he was dating profeser janhorsten

[Gay Fashion Queen] i saw him kissing Docotor ableston once

[Gay Fashion Queen] that was last semestor tho

[~~Shell~~BY~~] huh

[Osquared] why

[Idiotic Bird] hey anyone wanna have lunch

[~~Shell~~BY~~] perfect a stake out partner

[Idiotic Bird] a what

[Gay Fashion Queen] hallaeluikla 

[Gay Fashion Queen] she found someone else 

[~~Shell~~BY~~] i thought you lovved our stake ous sessions

[Gay Fashion Queen] i do when they dont run past noon

[Gay Fashion Queen] and when we odnt lay on roofs

[Osquared] also im pretty sure avid just got diagnosed with scizoprhenia

[Osquared] it was either him or Karly

[Idiotic Bird] no it was karly 

[Idiotic Bird] they used to be my roomate

[Idiotic Bird] took the semestor off to figure stuff out

[Osquared] ohhhh

[~~Shell~~BY~~] can i add people?

[Idiotic Bird gave ~~Shell~~BY~~ Adding Friends!!!]

[Idiotic Bird changed Idiotic Bird’s name to Pyre]

[~~Shell~~BY~~] mean

[Gay Fashion Queen] who you gonna add?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] doant worry about it

9/25/25          22:39

[Pyre] hour what ficve? 

[Pyre] shelby has still not let me leave

[Pyre] i need sleeppppp

[Osquared] mood

[Gay Fashion Queen] your not gonna get it

[Gay Fashion Queen] not for a long time at lest

[~~Shell~~BY~~] PYRO GET OFF YOUR PHONE

[~~Shell~~BY~~] THEYLL SEE US

[Pyre] were on the roof across the street 

[Pyre] i cant even see them

[~~Shell~~BY~~] its the point now give me

[Pyre] noa;sdlfkjasdo;fhbfdlkvhjadrslgih

[Gay Fashion Queen] ha

[Gay Fashion Queen] get im shelby

[Osquared] do you need a friend

[Gay Fashion Queen] no im jsut waiting for my bf to call

[Osquared] cool

9/26/25         03:23

[~~Shell~~BY~~] can someone come get pyro

[~~Shell~~BY~~] he fell asleep

[Osquared] cant im doing my essay

[~~Shell~~BY~~] and scotts calling his bf darn it

[Osquared] how did you know?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] were roomates

[~~Shell~~BY~~] duh

[Osquared] i feel like an idiot for foregetting that

[~~Shell~~BY~~] we never told ya

[Osquared] nah im sure you did

[Gay Fashion Queen] stop blowing up my phone

[Gay Fashion Queen] im trying to have a nice conversation with my bf

[~~Shell~~BY~~] tell cam i say hi!!!!!!!!

04:34           9/26/25

[Gay Fashion Queen] he says hi back

[~~Shell~~BY~~] yesssss

09:56 9/26/25

[Pyre] what did i miss?

[~~Shell~~BY~~] well our stake out was useless as i had to drag your butt home

[Osquared] scotts boyfriend is named cam

[Gay Fashion Queen] for some reson yall are so intrested in my love life

[Osquared] i have mutiple bets onit

[Gay Fashion Queen] excuse me

[~~Shell~~BY~~] i used to too

[Gay Fashion Queen] ya but your you

[~~Shell~~BY~~] whats that supposed to mean

[Gay Fashion Queen] dw bout it

23:45         9/26/25

[Osquared] it means he sees you as a annoying younger sister

[~~Shell~~BY~~] rude

[~~Shell~~BY~~] but fair

06:34         9/27/25

[Pyre] will you guys stop texting in the middle of the night

[Gay Fashion Queen muted Pyre for 2 hours]

[~~Shell~~BY~~ unmuted Pyre for 2 hours]

[~~Shell~~BY~~] wehn you stop texting at unvoidly hours

[Gay Fashion Queen] let me mute him

[Osquared muted the chat for 8 hours. Good Night!]

[Gay Fashion Queen] its six in the morning

UNSENT

[~~Shell~~BY~~] rude

UNSENT

 [Pyre] why        

 UNSENT

14:34         9/27/25

[The Chat has been Unmuted. Good Morning!]

[Gay Fashion Queen] its six in the morning

[~~Shell~~BY~~] rude

 [Pyre] why

[Osquared] that worked well

[Pyre] why the heck did my phone jus tblow up

[~~Shell~~BY~~] can we agree to never do that again

[Gay Fashion Queen] pls

[Gay Fashion Queen] shelby and i dont have classes today

[Gay Fashion Queen] so instead of spammnghere

 [Gay Fashion Queen] she somehow got my ex’s number 

[Gay Fashion Queen] started to spam him

[Gay Fashion Queen] and got a restraining order

[~~Shell~~BY~~] in my defense

[Pyre] i doubt you have one

[~~Shell~~BY~~] i had nothing better to do

[~~Shell~~BY~~] the other group chats i had been in kicked me out

[Osquared] im scared to ask why

[~~Shell~~BY~~] i did nothing worng!!

[Gay Fashion Queen] she sent mutiple pdfs including slideshows on why big foot is real

[Pyre]…

[Osquared]…

[~~Shell~~BY~~] he is!!

[Pyre] i regret my life

[Osquared] should have kms in high school

[~~Shell~~BY~~] what does kms mean?

[Gay Fashion Queen] weve gone over this

[~~Shell~~BY~~] im pretty sure it does mean ‘keeping myslef safe’

[Pyre] it does

[Pyre] (saying only to keep the cinimon roll a cinimon roll)

[Gay Fashion Queen] she is anything but

[~~Shell~~BY~~] then what does it mean??

[Osquared] sorry in class 

[Gay Fashion Queen] cam’s calling me

[~~Shell~~BY~~] you had your weekly call yesterday

[Gay Fashion Queen] he has a audition to day so good luck call

[~~Shell~~BY~~] fine ill just….

23:54          9/27/25

[Osquared] she never did anything

[~~Shell~~BY~~] becasue this stupid website isnt working!!!

[Gay Fashion Queen] what wevsite

[~~Shell~~BY~~] dont worry abuot it

[Gay Fashion Queen] well im gonna

[Gay Fashion Queen] cause the last time you said that you painted our dorm pink!!

[~~Shell~~BY~~] i thought you like it!!

[Pyre] is this going ot become a thing

[Gay Fashion Queen] I did!!!

[Gay Fashion Queen] my wallet didnt!!

[Osquared] you’ve been in this chat for two weeks and your jsut now asking htis

[~~Shell~~BY~~] i payed you back

[Gay Fashion Queen] in amond joys

[Gay Fashion Queen] who likes almond joys

[~~Shell~~BY~~] my grand pa does

[Pyre] cant they do this outlaoud

[Pyre] or in thier own chat

[Osqured] nah i enjoy the chaos

[Osquared] great you jinxed it

[Pyre] no 

[Pyre] [1 link]

[Osquared] is that the secirety camras?

[Pyre] ya

[Osquared] so do we know whos gonna bail em out?

[Pyre] my wallet cant handle that

[Osquared] neither can mine