Work Text:
Castiel had just returned from running mid-morning errands when his phone went off. He was annoyed. His boss frequently tried to call him on Saturdays even though Castiel had made it very clear he wasn’t going to do anything work-related on the weekends. He geared himself up to have another unpleasant conversation with Mr. Adler about his boundaries, but then he saw Dean’s name on the caller ID.
Castiel’s mood improved immediately. Dean made it a point to check in on him every day. It reminded him of back in his high school days when Dean made sure to say hello and wave to him in the hallways.
They hadn’t been friends back then. Dean had been the most popular omega in the entire school. Class vice president, track star, head of the film club, adventure club, car club. Castiel had been a shy, awkward nerd and the only club he had ever been invited to join was the math club. At the time, he had actually been close friends with Sam Winchester, Dean’s younger brother. Sam was a fellow nerd. A freshman who was taking senior level courses. It was the kind of thing most kids got bullied for. But nobody ever bullied Sam while Dean was watching and because of his friendship with Dean’s brother, nobody wanted to be seen bullying Castiel either. Sure, he had gotten the occasional rude note taped to his locker and leaves shoved down his shirt on the bus. But once Dean started acknowledging him in the hallways, the name-calling and shoving stopped.
As grateful as Castiel was for Dean’s protection, he had never been delusional enough to think he actually had a chance with him, not when there were so many other alphas jockeying for Dean’s attention. Alphas who had bright futures ahead of them as professional athletes, businessmen, software designers, doctors, politicians.
Dean himself had won a scholarship to a very good school out of state for automotive design and since Castiel had to start at the local community college, he assumed he would never see Dean again after high school.
But then Castiel had decided to attend their ten year high school reunion. Very few people recognized him from high school and he was fine with that. He hadn’t come to reminisce about high school friendships or good memories. High school hadn’t been a great experience for him. He was mostly there for the food and drinks and the hope that he could see some of the popular bullies make fools of themselves. So he just settled himself in a corner with a glass of wine and a piece of cake and people watched.
He was startled when Dean approached him. Dean was very drunk, but his face lit up with recognition. “Hey, Cas.” He clumsily clapped a hand to Castiel’s shoulder. “Glad you could make it.”
Dean was quickly distracted by a group of his old alpha friends tugging him away, loudly and drunkenly demanding to know why he was working at Singer’s Salvage instead of designing the cool cars they were looking forward to.
Dean just laughed and told them how hard it was to break into the industry. He was working at his uncle’s shop until he could get a design job somewhere. He started sketching the outline of a car while the alphas crowded around him, hooting like frat boys and begging Dean to add more “cool shit” to the drawing.
Castiel hadn’t been aware that Dean was back in the local area and unfortunately Dean was still as charming and beautiful as ever. He slouched down further into his seat and took a healthy swallow of his wine. It would take a lot more alcohol for him to bury down his old crush.
A shadow fell over him as Meg Masters perched on the back of his chair. “Well, well, well. Look who it is. Little Clarence has all grown up to be a real alpha.”
Castiel sighed. “Go away, Meg.”
“Excuse you. I’m just trying to have a nice conversation here.” She waved a hand at him. “What’s with the look you’ve got going on? Some kind of costume?”
“No, these are my normal clothes. I wear them to work everyday.” Castiel was already regretting spending his Friday night at the reunion instead of going home and having a peaceful weekend.
Meg frowned. “These are your work clothes? What do you do for work?”
“I’m an accountant.”
“The spicy kind?”
Castiel frowned. “I have never heard of a ‘spicy’ accountant.”
She rolled her eyes. “The sexy kind. The kind who slides out of that big, baggy trenchcoat and shows off all the muscles underneath. You were on the college swim team, right? So you’ve gotta be pretty ripped. And with those pretty baby blues of yours, you could be making good money. I know there’s more than a few omegas here who would happily pay to spend a night with you.”
Castiel firmly repeated the same things he had told her back in high school. He was utterly indifferent to sex. If his partners liked and needed sex to feel fulfilled in their relationship, he would have sex with them. But it was absolutely fine if they didn’t want sex. Sex might feel good, but Castiel mostly engaged in sexual activity for his partner’s pleasure. He saw it as an act of service akin to attending an event his partner was interested in. He would never seek out a profession that was sex-based and he would never have sex with complete strangers.
“Such a shame,” Meg said. “That body is wasted on you.” She flounced off in search of another victim.
Almost immediately, Dean stumbled back over, his eyes wide and wild. “Is all of that true?” he demanded.
Castiel nodded and braced himself for Dean’s criticism. It would hurt a lot more coming from Dean.
Dean’s hand tightened on the back of Castiel’s chair and his voice dropped down to a whisper. “Are there really other people out there who never want sex?”
It shocked Castiel to realize how much of a facade Dean had been putting up all through high school, how much he struggled thinking he was weird and broken. And even though he was struggling, he still found a way to protect his little brother and his nerdy friend from being bullied.
From then on, Castiel made it his mission to teach Dean all about asexuality and make sure he understood there was nothing wrong with him.
They had been dating for four months now and Cas still smiled every time he had a call or text from Dean. Phone calls were rare, but texts came almost every morning. Sometimes it was just an emoji or a “Morning, sunshine”, but Castiel appreciated every single one of them. They made him feel seen and wanted.
“Hello, Dean.”
“Hey, Cas. How’s it going?”
Castiel frowned. Dean’s voice was a lot raspier than usual and his tone was flat. It sounded like he was coming down with a cold. “Are you alright? You sound ill.”
“I’m not sick. My heat just started.”
Castiel held his breath. They had talked about the possibility of him helping Dean through his next heat and he had packed a bag in preparation. But maybe Dean had changed his mind. They had only been dating for a few months and Dean had never had an alpha help him through a heat before. Maybe he wasn’t ready.
And Castiel wouldn’t blame him. It had taken a lot for Dean to admit he’d never had a heat partner before. He had spent most of his life carefully cultivating the reputation that he’d had a lot of sexual partners. In high school, he would disappear for his heats and return to school five days later, bragging about all the heat sex he’d had. Castiel now knew all of that was made up. Dean had never had sex with anyone, in heat or outside of it.
Dean sighed. “Can you…”
It took everything Castiel had not to jump in and offer to help him through his heat. It was important that it was Dean’s decision to have him come over. He didn’t want to pressure him in any way.
“I think my heat would suck a little less if you were here keeping me company. Can you come over?”
“Of course,” Castiel said. He made sure not to sound too eager. “I’ll grab some things and then I’ll be over shortly.”
“Can you pick me up an apple cranberry pie from Betty’s Bakery on the way?”
Castiel chuckled. “Yes, Dean. I won’t forget the pie.”
He would bring more than just pie. His first stop was to the grocery store to pick up a few things for easy meals. He had no idea what food Dean had in his kitchen and he would hate to arrive and find out he immediately had to go out shopping again. Unless Dean wanted him to leave, his plan was to stay in Dean’s apartment through his entire heat, doing whatever he needed to make his heat easier.
He had been to Dean’s apartment twice before and he still had the code to get into Dean’s complex and the spare key for the apartment.
As soon as he opened the front door, he took a deep inhale. The apartment was saturated with Dean’s scent, which was normal. Dean lived alone and his scent would be on everything. But it was stronger than usual and there was an acrid undercurrent that signified pain or distress.
Castiel’s alpha instincts kicked in. He needed to find the omega and protect him from whatever was hurting him, comfort him as needed, and prevent it from happening again.
He followed Dean’s scent down the hallway and into his bedroom. Dean was lying facedown in his nest, dressed in nothing but a pair of loose-fitting shorts.
“Dean? Are you awake?”
Dean lifted his head. His face was sweaty and his hair was plastered to his forehead. He looked exhausted and miserable but a little bit of life came back into his eyes. “Cas. Did you bring my pie?”
Castiel chuckled. “Yes, Dean.” He held up the plastic shopping bag.
“Thank god for small mercies.” Dean dropped his head back down. “I hate being in heat. This just sucks so much.”
“I know,” Castiel said soothingly. He rubbed Dean’s back. “Sit up so you can have your pie.”
“That sounds like too much work. Just set it down in front of me.”
Castiel rolled his eyes. “You’re not going to eat from the tin like an animal. Get up.”
“I don’t wanna.”
“That’s fine. I’ll leave it on the kitchen counter and you can come get it when you’re ready.”
“You monster,” Dean grumbled. But he dragged himself up into a seated position.
Castiel settled crosslegged on the floor in front of Dean’s nest and started unpacking the pie and the plastic utensils. “Would you like me to cut a slice for you and put it on a plate or feed you by hand?”
“Not necessary. I’m going to eat straight from the tin like an animal.”
Castiel shook his head and handed Dean the pie tin and a fork. “I’m glad you haven’t lost your sense of humor.”
“Sarcasm is all I have left at the moment. Being in heat sucks so goddamn much.”
“It could be worse. You could wake up feeling as awful as you do and also uncontrollably horny.”
Dean grimaced. “You’re right. I don’t even want to move right now. If I had to touch myself and rub one out, that would be way too much. I can’t believe there are omegas out there having sex while they’re in heat. I’m gross and sweaty and so fucking hot no matter what I do. Some fuckass alpha’s body heat would only make everything worse.”
Castiel shrugged. “Some omegas might appreciate their partner’s scent more than they hate the body heat.”
Dean snorted. “I like your scent and it does make me feel better. But if you even attempted to hug me right now, I would bite you.”
“It’s that bad, is it?”
“Yup. That back rub was really pushing it.”
“I apologize, Dean. I should have asked before touching you.”
“Nah, it’s fine. I’m usually all about touching.”
“But you’re in heat now and the rules for interacting with you are different.”
Dean snorted derisively. “There’s no rules. I’m still me. I just feel like I’ve been dipped in lava. Pretend it’s the middle of summer and the AC’s gone out. You’d be real pissy and want to push me away if I tried to hug you, right?”
“Right,” Castiel said. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
It would take some getting used to. As much as Dean liked to say he wasn’t a touchy-feely sort of person, he communicated a lot through physical touch. From fistbumps and high-fives with his coworkers to an arm slung proudly over Sam’s shoulder as he announced that his baby brother had passed the bar exam. When Castiel got a chance to see Dean in person, he was always greeted with a hug that was as warm and welcoming as Dean’s smile and when they shared a bed, he frequently woke up to find Dean wrapped around him like an octopus. He couldn’t call it cuddling or snuggling to Dean’s face because Dean believed those words only got used in chick flicks, but Dean was definitely a cuddler.
Castiel shouldered his duffel bag. “Let me go get my stuff set up in the guest room and then I’ll be back to talk about logistics for your heat.”
“You don’t need to do that,” Dean said quickly.
“Dean, please. I’m not offended that you don’t want to share a bed with me right now. I assumed that would probably be the case anyway, considering your history.”
The very first time he had slept in Dean’s bed, Dean laid there rigid as a board, as far on his side of the bed as he could get. Castiel had desperately wanted to do something to make Dean feel at ease but he was afraid any word or touch might not be comforting. Neither of them had gotten much sleep that night. But when he woke up the next morning, Dean was already out of bed, making Castiel’s favorite pancakes. Seeing so much relief and joy in Dean’s face across the kitchen table made Castiel’s heart ache. Something had obviously happened to Dean in his past if he was so afraid of letting his guard down while he slept. Dean had never talked about it, but Castiel resolved to show Dean that he could trust him and he would never make Dean endure anything that would make him uncomfortable.
“You live pretty close. You could go home at night if you want. I’ll be fine for a few hours.”
“That won’t be necessary,” Castiel said. “The guest room is great, I’m sure. You care about your brother and you’d make sure he was comfortable when he visits.”
Dean smiled sheepishly. “That obvious, huh?”
“It’s nothing to be ashamed about, Dean. Wanting your loved ones to feel at home in your home is a good thing.”
Dean cleared his throat. “But it’s just…Sam.”
“Yes, I know. Your parents are deceased, your uncle lives even closer to you than I do and when I visit, I always sleep in your room. Your friends all live in the local area, as far as I’m aware. Of course Sam would be the only one using the guest room. It doesn’t mean you don’t have people over. They just don’t need to spend the night.”
Dean shook his head. “You’ll understand when you see it.”
“Well, okay.” Castiel checked his watch. “It’s almost eleven. Do you want anything to eat for lunch or just the pie for now?”
Dean stared at the pie for a moment before slowly pushing it aside. “I’ll finish the rest of this later. I could go for a sandwich or something.”
Castiel was relieved. Sandwiches had been at the top of his list of easy lunch ideas. And he knew exactly what Dean liked on his sandwiches. “I’ll be right back with your lunch,” he promised.
First, he went to the guest room to drop off his things. As soon as he opened the door, he understood why Dean was so embarrassed. The whole room was completely Sam’s style.
On one wall was a sizable bookshelf filled with all sorts of law books, case studies, historical fiction, speculative fiction, and foreign language novels. All things Dean wouldn’t be caught dead reading. There was a small writing desk in the corner with a very nice antique lamp. And when Castiel opened the closet to hang up some of his clothes, he found one of Sam’s jackets.
Castiel found it endearing how much Dean cared about his younger brother. Dean didn’t believe people when they told him he was good and kind and he just got embarrassed or defensive. But this was nothing Dean should be ashamed of. He carefully pushed Sam’s jacket to the back of the closet and hung up his own things.
After that, he put together two sandwiches with all the supplies he’d brought. The only vegetables Dean liked on his sandwiches were tomatoes and he called lettuce rabbit food, but that just meant there was more for Castiel. He piled Dean’s sandwich high with meats, cheeses, pickles, a few tomatoes and a generous dollop of mustard.
Castiel was sure it was going to be a sandwich Dean would like, but he was still surprised by how quickly Dean devoured the whole thing. Wordlessly, he handed Dean a glass of lemonade to wash it down.
Dean drank the whole thing in a few big gulps and then flopped down on the bed with a sigh of satisfaction. He patted his stomach. “Having real food to eat is great. I usually just survive on granola bars, chips, and doughnuts when I’m in heat. Getting up and out of bed takes a lot out of me and I don’t have the energy to cook.”
“Well, we can’t have that,” Castiel said. “I’m happy to feed you for the week.”
Dean’s heat was bound to be easier if he consumed plenty of protein to give him more energy. And ideally a vegetable or two. But Castiel wasn’t going to push it.
He watched as Dean yawned and made himself comfortable in bed. “So, what now?”
Dean shrugged. “I’m not feeling up for much right now. I’ll probably just sleep for a bit.”
“Do you want me to stay?”
“You don’t need to do that. Watching me sleep has to be more boring than watching paint dry.”
“That doesn’t answer my question.”
Dean rolled his eyes. “No. I don’t need you to stay while I take my nap. I’ll be asleep, not even aware that you’re here. Go off and do something to keep yourself entertained.”
“Alright,” Castiel said. He rose to his feet. “If you need anything, just holler. And if you don’t have the strength to yell, my phone will be on.”
He didn’t know how long Dean would be napping, but he would make the most of the time to get things ready for later. He turned the thermostat down, checked the ice dispenser, and organized a section of the fridge and pantry with the things he’d brought for him and Dean.
Two hours later, Dean texted him a sad emoji and a pie emoji.
Castiel chuckled and retrieved the rest of the pie from the fridge.
Back in Dean’s bedroom, he found Dean sitting back against the headboard. It was a good sign that he was sitting back up without encouragement. He must have recovered a little of his strength.
“Are you feeling any better after that nap?”
“No. I’m still tired. I feel like my body has been weighed down by bricks and I’m so goddamn sweaty that my hair is plastered to my forehead.”
“Do you want me to help with that?”
“Yes,” Dean said with a heavy sigh.
Castiel gently brushed Dean’s hair back from his forehead.
Dean shut his eyes. “Thank you. I don’t mean to be so needy.”
“It’s no problem,” Castiel said. “I’m here to help you with whatever you need.”
“You don’t have to do anything, babe. Just being here and keeping me company is helping. Usually I have to go through this shit alone.”
“I’m sorry that’s been the case. But I’m here now.” Castiel settled back on the floor. “What can I do for you besides being an ear to listen to you vent?”
“I dunno. Just be the supportive boyfriend you always are. Feed me pie and tell me I’m pretty.”
Castiel smiled. “Of course, Dean. You deserve to hear how radiant and lovely you are.”
Dean snorted. “I don’t want you to lie to me.”
“I’m not lying. I know you don’t feel well right now, but you are still beautiful, inside and out. You will always be beautiful to me.”
Dean ducked his head. Castiel wasn’t sure if he was just flushed from the heat or if he was blushing from embarrassment. But clearly Dean needed to hear those words more often.
—-
“I gotta take a leak,” Dean grumbled. “Again.” He swung his legs over the side of the bed and braced himself against the floor with a grimace.
Castiel was at his side in an instant, putting his arm under Dean’s for support. Poor Dean was so stiff and achy he could barely walk the few short feet down the hall to the bathroom. It had to be a blow to Dean’s pride to need help for something so routine, but Castiel wasn’t about to sit around and watch Dean struggle when he could be helpful.
Like he had on all Dean’s previous trips to the bathroom, Castiel positioned himself far enough from the door that he wouldn’t really hear anything, but was close enough that he could step in to help him make the short trip back to bed as soon as he was ready. The only thing he could actually hear was Dean cursing at the sink and at his hands for shaking.
Finally, the door creaked back open with Dean bracing himself in the doorway. Castiel moved back into position to support him and help him back down the hallway.
Dean sank back into bed with a sigh of relief. “I need to stop drinking so much water because this is fucking exhausting.”
“You need to stay hydrated, Dean. You lose a lot of fluids through sweat. And water plays a critical role in your body’s-”
Dean waved a hand dismissively. “Don’t need the science lesson, Cas. I know water’s supposed to do all this great stuff for me, but all it’s doing right now is making me have to piss. How do I even have water left in my body to make sweat?”
“That’s why it’s important for you to replenish your fluids.”
“I’m tired of replenishing them just to piss them away again. I’m tired of getting up to go to the bathroom so many goddamn times. This whole thing is just…tiring. There’s no way I’d make this many bathroom breaks on my own.”
“I’m not making your heat more difficult, am I?” Castiel asked hesitantly. He would hate to know he was causing Dean undue discomfort.
“No, no. You’re right. I need to keep drinking water. If I stay hydrated, I’ll probably feel less shitty when I come out of heat. But it’s a pain in the ass right now. And definitely an inconvenience for you. I hate that I can’t even get to the goddamn bathroom without help. You’re my boyfriend, not my nurse. This isn’t what you signed up for.”
“I signed up for helping you through your heat. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to help you in any way necessary.”
“But I didn’t tell you what it would really be like. I’m sure you expected something a lot less work like just providing company while I’m miserable.”
“I had no expectations about your heat. I just came to help in whatever way you needed me to.”
Dean rolled his eyes. “Come on, Cas. You had to have assumed something.”
Castiel shrugged. “I knew you didn’t want sex and I came expecting not to have sex with you. So, that is all according to expectation. Everyone’s heats are different. There are omegas who enjoy being in heat and for them, it’s several days of partying and having sex with multiple partners, there are omegas in committed relationships whose heats are only eased by sex with their partners and find it a time for intimate bonding, there are omegas whose heats can be temporarily eased by sexual activity, but feel generally miserable, there are omegas who don’t want a heat partner but feel physical arousal and masturbate to get them through it, and I’m sure there are other omegas like you who don’t have any urge to have sex and need some other way to endure their heats.”
“Doubtful,” Dean said. “Pretty sure I’m the only person on earth who gets the mega flu everytime I go into heat.”
“I think there are probably far more asexuals out there than you might realize, probably in hiding like you once were. And I can tell you for a fact that you are not the only omega who deals with muscle cramps, weakness, fever, aches, and nausea during a heat. I know allosexual omegas who feel pretty miserable at points of their heat. Yours is a pretty severe case, yes. It’s unfortunate that you’re so miserable and I hate to see you suffering. I wish my mere presence would be enough to ease your pain. But it’s not, so I have to work harder to help you through it. Can I get you some Tylenol or Advil? Or do you have some extra strength heat medication you can take?”
Dean snorted. “There’s no meds that’ll get rid of heats. If there was, I would have taken them a long time ago.”
“I know that. I’m just talking about something to temporarily ease your pain and make the circumstances more bearable.”
“Normal painkillers don’t do much. And I can’t get the really good stuff without a prescription. But to get a prescription, I have to try getting fucked first. Because apparently everyone thinks sex magically makes everything better.”
Castiel pursed his lips. “Doctors have no business meddling in your sex life, but I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. People are far too comfortable trying to tell omegas how to live their lives. Well, I’ll grab you whatever medication you do have. At least it’ll be something.”
“No, don’t worry about it. I’ll grab some next time I have to use the bathroom. That’ll happen soon enough. You shouldn't have to do everything for me.”
“Don’t feel bad for needing help. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t love you and want to be here. I hate to see you in so much pain and I wish I could do more for you.”
“I do feel better with you here. It just feels weird to have somebody else seeing me like this. I’ve pretty much gone through heats on my own since I was maybe 14 or 15.”
Castiel frowned. “Your father never helped you?”
“Why would my dad help me through my heats? That’s gross, Cas.”
“Your heats have never been sexual. Especially not the first few. Everyone’s first few ruts and heats are like a mild illness as the body goes through puberty. And family should be caring for you during this time and helping you to understand what’s happening.”
“Okay, so my dad did kinda help me through the first few. Mostly by leaving packages of gatorade and jerky by my door. He’s never been the warm, nurturing type. The first few times I went into heat it just felt like a horrible stomach flu. All of the misery, none of the sexcapades. Dad told me to man up and get through them because eventually I’d get the good, sexy kind. But then they just…stayed that way. I never started making the pheromones that would attract a partner and I never felt any urge to get dicked down. And Dad started getting worried something was wrong with me. He carted me around to see all these different doctors. They told him there was nothing they could do for me. This was just the way my heats were. Maybe one day I’d get curious about what sex was like and try it out and end up liking it, but they couldn’t give me anything to make me want it.”
“Thank goodness for that,” Castiel said. He shuddered to think of the implications.
“Dad didn’t want Sam to get the wrong idea that heats were always supposed to be like that. When you get older, it’s weird for your family to nurse you through your heats. My family has this old hunting cabin up in the mountains. And every few months when my heat came on, Dad would drive me up to the cabin and leave me with enough supplies to get through the week.”
Castiel’s jaw dropped. “He left you in a cabin in the middle of nowhere? What kind of father abandons their child to the elements?”
“I was a teenager, Cas.”
“Teenagers are still children. There’s no excuse for that. You could have gotten hurt or needed extra supplies. Anything could have happened to you out in the middle of nowhere. How was he supposed to know how you were doing if he didn’t stay with you to take care of you?”
“I had my cell phone. I always called him as soon as my heat broke and he drove up to get me. And if anything had gone wrong, I could have called him.”
Castiel pinched the bridge of his nose.
As far as he was concerned, John WInchester was an awful human being and the reason Dean had always felt like there was something wrong with him. A good father wouldn’t have felt the need to hide his son away in the woods like he was a shameful secret. Castiel very much doubted that John would have ever come to Dean’s rescue if something had gone wrong. He probably would have told Dean to suck it up and endure.
“Well, that was then and this is now,” Dean said brightly, cutting into his throughts. “You’re here to feed me and water me so I’m not doing it all alone. We should do something so you’re not bored. I played solitaire up in the cabin to pass the time, but since there’s two of us, we can play poker.”
“I’ve never been good at poker,” Castiel admitted. “Any kind of card game, actually.”
Dean raised an eyebrow. “You’re an accountant. How can you be bad at something with numbers?”
“It’s not the numbers. I’ve just never been good at the gamesmanship aspects. Bluffing is…beyond me.”
“That makes sense,” Dean said. “You’re honest to a fault. But I like that about you. It means I can trust your word. So, no card games. Let’s try Battleship. That’s also a two player game.”
“I don’t think it’ll be easy to play a board game with you in bed.” Castiel supposed there was enough room for him to sit at the foot of Dean’s bed and put the board down between them, but it would be awkward.
“It’s not a board game. Well, sort of. We each have our own boards. You’ll see. It’s in the closet with the rest of the games if you want to give it a try.”
Castiel opened the game closet and pulled out the box. Once he lifted the lid, he understood what Dean meant. There were two gray plastic cases inside. Each of them would have their own playing space, small enough to hold on their laps. He handed Dean one case and opened the other. Inside, he saw ship figurines and little pegs. Dean talked him through the set-up and basic rules.
It sounded simple enough. Put his ships down on his grid, try to guess where Dean’s ships were on his grid and hope Dean didn’t guess where his ships were. There was some strategy to it, but mostly a good deal of luck. And there weren’t too many steps to play. It would be a nice, easy game for both of them.
By 9 p.m, Dean was quickly fading. He was taking longer and longer to figure out what coordinates to guess and he could barely keep his eyes open.
“To be continued,” Castiel said as he packed up the game.
“I’m sorry. I’m a terrible partner.”
“Don’t be sorry. You need your rest to make it through tomorrow. Goodnight, Dean.”
He also needed his rest so he’d be ready to take care of Dean for another day, but he doubted he would get much sleep. The bed was very nice because of course Dean would only have the best for his baby brother, but it was still an unfamiliar bed and it didn’t feel right. He reminded himself that Dean had it so much worse. It had to be very difficult to get any sleep at all when he was so hot and sweaty. As much as Castiel liked to be conscientious about his electricity use, he had never been able to sleep in the summer without a couple fans in his bedroom.
He got up and carefully turned the thermostat down another few notches. If it got too cold inside the house, he could always put his coat back on. But Dean only had so many layers he could remove.
Dean texted him a string of emojis and swear words. Castiel had to smile. Reading his texts wasn’t the same as hearing the words out of Dean’s mouth. And being down the hall wasn’t the same as being curled up in Dean’s bed with him. But they were both under the same roof, which was a lot closer than they usually got.
—---
Castiel woke up to a beam of bright sunlight across his face. It was confusing until he remembered that he was sleeping in Dean’s guest room. He was still a little tired and he was tempted to snuggle back under the covers for another few minutes. But he was here to care for Dean and Dean’s comfort was more important than his comfort right now.
He slipped on a light jacket and made himself a nice warm cup of coffee so he could start waking up and be ready to face the day. Dean didn’t have all the nice coffee creamers that Castiel did, but he had good, strong coffee and that was all that really mattered.
Once he felt sufficiently alert, he peeked into Dean’s room. Dean was already awake, which Castiel expected. He was always more of a morning person that Castiel was.
“How are you doing, Dean?”
“Still in heat.”
“Do you feel any better than you did yesterday?”
Dean shrugged. “Heat’s heat, man. I’m gonna feel like shit the whole time.”
“Would you like another dose of Tylenol? I can make you a cup of coffee to go with it. Caffeine is supposed to help make medications work faster.”
“I could definitely use some caffeine. That’s the only thing that’ll keep me going. I’m still fucking tired.”
“Or you could just go back to sleep for a little while longer. There’s no reason you have to be awake right now. You have nothing to do today but exist.”
“But you’re here.”
“So? You don’t have to keep yourself awake on my account. I can entertain myself. There’s a whole room full of books.” He could even catch up on work emails. But he didn’t want to give Adler the wrong idea. He still wasn’t making himself available to work weekends.
“No, no, no. I’m not going to leave you to fend for yourself with Sam’s boring textbooks. Get some coffee in me and let me wake up a little and I think we can continue our game.”
“If that’s what you really want to do today.”
“Yeah, of course. I’m so close to sinking all your ships and I’m not going to quit until they’re all destroyed.”
That wasn’t quite how Cas remembered the game going, but he’d let Dean have his misplaced optimism.
Making Dean coffee was easy. He always insisted on drinking it black. Black coffee seemed like a kind of torture to Castiel, but to each their own. It just meant he couldn’t make Dean a special, personalized cup of coffee with all the fancy toppings. But he could put the coffee in one of the fun, novelty glasses Sam sent Dean from out of state and hopefully that would make him smile.
“Here you are.” Cas handed Dean the coffee and a bottle of Tylenol. “You let me know whenever you want me to start on breakfast.”
Dean eyed the cup suspiciously. “I thought you were making me coffee. What the hell is this?”
“Iced coffee. I didn’t think you’d want to drink anything hot right now.”
“This better not be one of those frou frou iced lavender lattes Sam always gets.”
“Of course not. You don’t have lavender in your kitchen. It’s just regular coffee, poured over ice.”
Dean took a sip and then held the cup out, giving it a long, considering look. “Not bad,” he said finally. “Bring out the game. I’m ready to go.”
Castiel set the case back up and surveyed the state of the board. As he had thought, Dean wasn’t anywhere near annihilating him. Dean had eliminated his 2 peg ship and 4 peg ship. Castiel had taken out Dean’s 5 peg ship and one of the 3 peg ships so he was actually ahead by a small margin. It was pretty much a tie at that point, as far as Castiel was concerned, which was actually great. It felt almost like starting a brand new round.
A few minutes after they began playing again, Castiel realized that Dean actually had a huge advantage against him. Apparently that optimism wasn’t so misplaced. He had already taken out Castiel’s 2-peg destroyer and he only had to go searching for the larger ships. No matter how carefully Castiel strategized, there were numerous spots for the tiny ship to hide on the board and he never did find it.
“Good game,” Castiel said as he carefully put the ships back in their holders. “I’m glad the coffee has helped you feel like your old self again.”
“Eh, I’m pretty sure you let me win.”
“How would I do that, Dean?”
“I dunno. I feel like you were kind of taking it easy on me. You’ve been so good to me these past few days.”
“Being kind to you isn’t the same thing as taking it easy on you. I know you wouldn’t appreciate pity. You had a stroke of luck at the beginning of the game and you capitalized on that with good strategic playing. That’s all your doing, Dean. I didn’t throw the game.”
“It just feels weird to win for a change. Sam usually kicks my ass in these games.” Dean stretched his arms over his head. “I feel a little more awake now. Maybe you can help me out to the living room and I’ll watch a movie with you?”
Dean wasn’t making eye contact with him and his tone was deliberately casual. But Castiel could tell it was very important to him that he make it out of bed, even if only for a few hours.
“Of course, Dean. I’d be happy to watch something with you.”
Castiel settled Dean onto the left side of the couch and took the seat on the right. It was different from their usual movie watching experience, where he sat in the middle and Dean draped himself over Castiel like a cat and stole pieces of popcorn out of his bowl. But it was still nice to be able to watch a movie with him, even under less than ideal circumstances.
Castiel flicked through Dean’s Netflix account. “Anything you prefer to watch?”
“Nah, you pick.”
Castiel didn’t particularly care what movie they watched. He had always enjoyed watching Dean get involved in the movie more than what was on screen. But he knew Dean preferred action, sci-fi, and westerns.
Scrolling through Dean’s past watch history, he could see several cowboy movies. He didn’t want to pick anything Dean had very recently watched so he moved on to recommended similar movies. “What about Cowboy Killers?”
“Not that one,” Dean said immediately.
“Is it bad?” From the cover, it looked like a run of the mill western. Three men with shotguns were standing in the foreground, looking sternly into the distance. In the background, a horse was rearing up and a woman was running out of a burning saloon.
“Well. I don’t know if I’d say it was a bad movie, exactly. There’s just a lot of bad memories. I watched it on a date with my first boyfriend, Aaron.”
Castiel frowned. “That’s an R-rated movie and you would have been maybe fifteen or sixteen.”
“I know. We were supposed to watch some Pixar movie. I don’t even remember what it was at the time, but Aaron’s parents bought us tickets and dropped us off at the theatre. We snuck into Cowboy Killers. And at first it was great. Lots of action. But then the leading man holed up in this tiny town to hide from these outlaws who were chasing him. And of course while he’s there, the omega innkeeper goes into heat. Since it’s an R movie and not actual porn, there was no full frontal nudity. But I saw enough. The clothes ripping, the two making out like they wanted to eat each other’s faces off, the shoving against the wall, the begging, screaming, crying. It was all so violent. To me, it was a horror movie, but Aaron seemed to think it was super romantic. He wanted to try some of the stuff he’d seen in the movie. I kept making excuses to get out of it. But then he realized my heat was coming up at the end of the month and he started talking about how he couldn’t wait until I went into heat so we’d have all the freaky heat sex. I panicked and instead of talking to him like a reasonable, mature person, I started distancing myself from him. I would argue with him over petty stuff and be too busy for our dates. He broke up with me a week later and it was such a relief. I got to spend my heat alone in the cabin again. When I got back to school I made up a story of meeting some alpha from a different school and having all the sex ever. Apparently that story was a little too convincing because that’s all anyone I dated could ever talk about. How they couldn’t wait until I was in heat so it’d be nonstop sex for a whole week. I went through a string of alphas, hoping somebody would be different, but all of them were knotheads with nothing but sex on the brain. I always made sure we were broken up before my heat so I never had to go through a heat with any of them and nobody ever learned what a freak I am.”
“You are not a freak,” Castiel said firmly. “I will not let you talk about yourself that way.” He backed out of the list of westerns and navigated over to sci-fi. The Day the Aliens Invaded. Castiel had seen the movie a few times. There was no sex, no romance. Just a bunch of humans frantically fleeing for their lives and mostly getting themselves killed.
Dean curled up against the arm rest. His eyes were on the screen, but his mind was clearly elsewhere. Castiel ached for him.
Dean was only on the other side of the couch, but he might have been on the other side of the world.
Castiel couldn’t take him into his arms to comfort him and words weren’t going to be enough. He needed to show it through his actions.
After such an emotionally draining day, Castiel was sure Dean needed some comfort food. Besides pie, there was nothing Dean loved more than bacon so Castiel decided to make bacon mac and cheese. As soon as the movie ended, he got up and started making food.
Dean was still sitting on the couch when he returned, looking lost in thoughts.
“Dean?” Castiel said gently. “If you’re hungry, I made bacon mac and cheese.”
A little bit of life came back into Dean’s eyes. “That sounds amazing.” He accepted the bowl and eagerly took a bite.
The enthusiasm in Dean’s face dimmed a little as he chewed.
Castiel cringed. “Is it that bad?”
“Did you make boxed mac and cheese and then sprinkle bacon bits on top of it?”
“Yes,” Castiel admitted. “Dean, you know I can’t cook. I mostly do frozen dinners and takeout.”
Dean’s expression softened. “So this is you actually putting in the effort to make me something, more than you would for yourself. I’m grateful that I’m worth the effort. And this means you can cook, at least a little bit. I’m not going to bullshit you and tell you it’s top-tier gourmet, but you didn’t burn the noodles or turn it all into a soggy mess.”
“But it’s not as good as what you would make for yourself.”
Dean shrugged. “The mac and cheese is alright. I’ve had the boxed stuff plenty of times growing up because my mom couldn’t cook either. But the one thing I can’t stand is bacon bits. Bacon bits are a scourge upon the earth. No comparison to real bacon.”
Castiel chuckled. “I’ll remember that. No more bacon bits. Just plain mac and cheese.”
“Nah. If you can make mac and cheese, you can make bacon. Real bacon.”
“No, I can’t. It’s not the same process.”
“It’s not the same process, but it’s just as easy. Maybe even easier. You just stick a few strips of bacon in a pan, turn ‘em over once, and bam. Bacony goodness.”
“I’m not comfortable cooking meat. It’s important that it’s fully cooked because raw meat can make you sick, but you also don’t want it to be overcooked or burnt.”
“And you’ll know where that sweet spot is after a little experience. Sounds like I need to have you over sometime for cooking lessons.”
“I’ve had my share of lessons. They never seemed to stick.”
“Yeah, well, you haven’t had me as your teacher before. I bet I can explain things better than any fancy cooking school,” Dean said with a cocky smirk.
“Well, there’s no harm in trying.”
Dean rolled his eyes. “I think you’re really selling yourself short here. But if you’re really as hopeless as you claim, I’ll try to do some meal prep leading up to my next heat. So the next time you help me through a heat, you’ll have stuff that you can throw together real easy.”
Next time. Castiel liked the sound of that
—---
The next day, Dean still seemed deadset on teaching Castiel how to cook. He was glad to see Dean enthusiastic about something again, but it didn’t really seem like the right time for a big cooking lesson. And he hadn’t brought a lot of raw ingredients with him. Castiel had planned on making spaghetti for dinner with a jar of sauce, a bag of meatballs, and a box of pasta.
“That’s fine,” Dean said. “I don’t always make everything from scratch. Sometimes I start with a jar of sauce and doctor it up with some herbs and spices. I’ll show you.”
Unfortunately, Dean could only handle standing in the kitchen for a few minutes before his legs started to shake and even leaning against the counter couldn’t keep him upright. Castiel had to help him to the living room so he could sit down for a bit. But even that didn’t deter Dean and he shouted out suggestions to Castiel from the comfort of the couch.
Castiel made several trips from the kitchen to the living room with spoonfuls of sauce for Dean to taste. The constant back and forth was a little exhausting and he would much prefer having Dean by his side supervising his efforts, but even he had to admit it was satisfying seeing it all come together.
“I think we’re just about there,” Dean said. “You’re going to want to let that simmer for another twenty minutes and it should be done. I’m going to take a quick power nap. If I’m not up by the time everything’s ready, come get me out of bed. Because I want to taste this in all its glory.”
Castiel didn’t think it was going to be that glorious. Certainly nothing as glorious as the meals Dean made. But it was sweet he wanted to give it the benefit of the doubt.
Thirty minutes later, Castiel had plates prepared for him and Dean and he was reasonably proud of what he had made. It wasn’t perfect, but it was actual cooking. He had even made garlic bread out of the leftover sandwich bread because garlic bread always went well with spaghetti.
Dean was still asleep and he opened his eyes blearily when Castiel gently shook his shoulder. But he sat up eagerly when Castiel handed him the plate of garlic bread. “You made an appetizer too. Look at you being all fancy and shit. I’ll make a cook out of you yet.”
“This is nothing fancy. It’s just toast, essentially. I can make toast.”
“Still, you took the initiative and that’s all that matters.” Dean devoured the bread and then patted the other end of the bed. “You can sit here and eat with me if you want. I definitely overdid it today and I’m not getting back up for the rest of the night, but it’ll be nice to have dinner together.”
Castiel grabbed the plates of spaghetti and settled on the end of Dean’s bed. “I’d prefer sitting at the kitchen table, of course, but this is good. We need to make more time for date nights like this.”
“This is your idea of a good date?”
“Sure it is. I made you dinner and we get to spend time together. It’s fairly romantic, I think. And it’s better than any date where your partner expects sex from you afterwards.”
“That’s for damn sure,” Dean said. “If I had a glass, I’d toast to that right now.”
“I can get you some water,” Castiel said eagerly.
“No, no, you stay right where you are. I appreciate you, Cas. I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. And yeah, eating spaghetti in bed isn’t ideal. But it’s a better date than I’ve had with anybody else. All of my dates with you have been great. Because this is the first time I’ve dated anybody while being openly asexual. It’s so freeing to just be myself and not have to hide anything. So far, you’re the only person who knows I’m asexual.”
Castiel frowned. “I thought your father knew?”
“My dad knew I was different from other omegas, but he was always convinced there was something medically or mentally wrong with me. He didn’t know it was an actual thing. Same goes for probably everyone in my college dorm because Alistair’s a knothead and definitely the type to gossip about the omegas in the building.”
“Alistair. Is he one of your exes?”
Dean shuddered. “God no. He just lived in the room across the hall because it was a co-ed dorm. Terrible idea by the university, by the way. Most of the alphas in the building were knotheads, but Alistair was the worst. He’d make comments about how I’d be less frustrated by my classes if I had sex to take the edge off or that I was being irrational because my heat was coming up. Just typical knothead stuff. I usually went out to the cabin to have privacy for my heats but on spring break everybody on my floor had plans to go to Cabo. I didn’t have the money to go and my heat was due anyway so I stayed behind. And I figured since everybody would be gone, I could just stay in the dorms where it was comfortable and familiar. The second day of my heat, I woke up to find him in my room. Turns out he’d never gone on the trip. He just lied about going because he wanted to see me in heat and he was disappointed he didn’t catch me doing anything sexual.”
Castiel had never been a particularly assertive alpha. He despised the aggressive and territorial behaviour his subgender was known for. But he couldn’t help the sudden swelling of rage. He bared his teeth and growled. “I hope that alpha’s still in prison because if I run across him in the street, I’m going to tear his knot off.”
“Calm down. He never did anything to me. Apparently my scent is an erection killer.”
“He told you that? Jesus Christ. That’s even worse. Jail for the rest of his life.”
Dean rolled his eyes. “You can’t arrest someone for wanting sex. He was being a fucking creep, sure. But he didn’t actually touch me.”
“But he wanted to. If your scent didn’t put him off, he would have assaulted you, at the very, very least. And that’s a jailable offense. Attempted sexual assault.”
“No, he wouldn’t have. I may be mostly useless during my heats, but I know how to defend myself. I threw a shoe at his head and then a bottle of Gatorade and then a textbook. I chased that fucker out of my dorm and then I called the campus police and my uncle Bobby.”
“Good,” Castiel said. Alistair deserved a textbook thrown at his head. One of the big, heavy ones.
“We ended up in the dean’s office the day after my heat broke and since Alistair never actually laid a hand on me, it was considered a fight between the two of us. Since fighting is banned on campus, we were both expelled.”
Castiel’s jaw dropped. “You were expelled? But you’re the victim.”
“I’m not a victim,” Dean snarled. “I didn’t just sit there and let something happen to me. I fought back.”
“That’s not what being a victim means. It means you were an innocent person and someone tried to commit a crime against you. Because that’s exactly what Alistair tried to do, commit a crime. And I’m sorry the school administration brushed it off like it was nothing. They should have stood up for your safety and dignity instead of trying to protect the school’s reputation.”
“I didn’t need the school to do shit for me. I had my uncle Bobby. And until I met you, he was the only alpha in my life who hasn’t been a knothead.”
Castiel took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Dean. I’m not trying to blame you for anything that happened or make it sound like you handled things wrong. You did what you needed to do to survive the situation and I’m glad your uncle was there for you. Does he know what actually happened?”
“Why do you think I got expelled?” Dean smirked. “Uncle Bobby showed up with a shotgun and threatened to shoot Alistair’s balls off if he ever thought about touching me. We’re lucky I just got expelled and nobody went to jail.”
“It still doesn’t seem right,” Castiel muttered mutinously. “You’ve always wanted to work in automotive design and that was all stripped away from you over something that wasn’t even your fault.”
“It’s fine, Cas. I love my Uncle Bobby and I love working with him and the rest of the guys. It’s not the same as having my own place, but I still get to work on cars, like I’ve always wanted. It’s good work. And besides, I get to inherit the shop from him when he dies, which is hopefully someday far in the future so I’ll get there eventually.”
“Alright,” Castiel said. He forced himself to be calm. “I still don’t like it, but as long as you’re happy, that’s what really matters.”
“I appreciate that you’re so passionate about fighting injustices. It’s better than a lot of the stupid shit alphas work themselves up over. Maybe you should channel that energy into something productive and become a lawyer like Sammy. I think you’d be good at it.”
Castiel shook his head. “I’d make a terrible lawyer. I don’t have the right people skills or the charisma. And I studied math, not the law.”
“Well, you could still do something with your math skills. Don’t they need people checking the books to make sure there’s no fraud going on? Or checking a suspect’s bank records?”
“You mean forensic accounting?”
“Yeah, that. See? You even know the term for it. You could totally do that.”
Castiel shook his head. “I’m just a regular accountant, I’m afraid. But that’s okay. You don’t have to be involved in law to help make the world a better place. Your uncle sounds like a wonderful man who cares about you.”
“He is. I think he’s always known I was different and still cared about me anyway. Maybe one day I’ll work up the courage to actually explain asexuality to him.” Dean smiled faintly. “He’ll probably tell me my sex life is none of his business, but it’ll be good to actually say the words out loud, for him to really know me.”
“What about your brother?”
Dean looked away. “I’m not going to tell him.”
“Really? If you suspect he’s going to react like your father and-”
“He’s nothing like my dad,” Dean said firmly. “I’m sure he knew asexuality was a real thing before I did. If I had known I was asexual back in high school and come out to him then, he would have been supportive. But I’ve spent so long pretending to be someone I’m not. For most of his life, he’s believed I was a sex god among omegas. He’s going to feel so hurt and betrayed when he finds out the truth.”
“And the longer you keep up the charade, the more hurt he’ll be when the truth does eventually come out.”
“You can’t tell him,” Dean said desperately. “You can’t tell anyone.”
“I’m not going to. It’s not my place to out anyone, but I wish you wouldn’t see your sexuality as something shameful you have to hide. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being asexual and you are beautiful and perfect just the way you are. But it’s your choice who you want to share that information with. Just don’t ask me to lie and make up stories about our supposed sexual exploits together. If anyone asks, I’ll tell them what we did during your heat is private.”
“Fair enough,” Dean said. His hands were shaking as he took a bit of his spaghetti and the plate fell out of his grip and splattered sauce across the bed.
“Fuck!” Dean cursed, frantically flinging the sheets off himself. “We have to get the bedding off before it stains the mattress.”
Castiel helped him quickly strip the sheets off the bed. The mattress pad was unscathed, which was a relief. Nothing was ruined.
Dean scrubbed a hand down his face. “Fucking hell. I should have been more careful. I eat in bed for most of my heats. You’d think I would have learned not to spill shit everywhere by now.”
“It’s alright. The sheets can be washed. Your clothing can be washed. While we’re at it, you need a good wash too.”
“Sweetheart, I don’t have the strength to stand long enough to take a shower.”
“That’s okay. A bath will get you just as clean. Get yourself out of those dirty clothes while I get it set up.”
Considering Dean’s condition, Castiel filled the bathtub with water as cold as he could get it. Maybe it wouldn’t have the same relaxing effects as a nice warm bath before bed, but as long as it got Dean clean, that was what really mattered.
Dean eased himself down into the water. His eyes fluttered shut. “Oh. Oh, this feels amazing. I could stay in here all night.”
Castiel chuckled. “Probably not a good idea. I doubt the water will stay cold that long.”
“Ah, yeah, you’re right. But it’ll be nice while it lasts.”
Castiel piled up the sheets with all the clothes Dean had worn over the past few days. They were pretty well drenched in sweat and due for a good wash anyway on the heavy duty cycle. And while he was washing Dean’s sheets, he might as well throw his in to make a full load.
He hesitated. Dean didn’t have a spare set of sheets. And he would probably want to go back to bed before a full laundry cycle finished. But the guest bed was the same size as Dean’s bed so the sheets would be interchangeable. And a slightly used set of sheets had to be better than a sweat-soaked set of sheets. He could always change them back once the cycle finished. So he swapped the sheets and then started the load of laundry.
Fifteen minutes later, Dean called out to him from the bathroom. Castiel went back in to help him out of the tub, dry off and get clean clothes on, and then hobble his way back to his bedroom.
Dean paused at the edge of his bed. “These aren’t my sheets.”
Castiel was briefly worried that he’d overstepped but then Dean broke into a bright smile and he rolled himself up in the sheets, burying his face in them to sniff. “This is amazing,” he said. “These sheets have your scent all over them.”
“These are the sheets I used the past two nights. I know that means they’re not clean, but they’re cleaner than the sheets you were using so I hope that’s okay.”
“It’s more than okay,” Dean said. “I get to have your scent in bed with me even if you’re not in bed with me. You’re the best, babe.” He waved a hand in Castiel’s direction. “Give me your hand.”
Castiel carefully took Dean’s hand. It was warm and damp, but it felt so wonderful to be able to touch him again.
Dean squeezed his hand gently. “I love you. I can’t wait until this shitshow is over with so I can show you just how much. Ten million kisses. One for each second you have to put up with me.”
“I’m not ‘putting up with’ you, Dean. I’m happy to take care of you. But I do look forward to you feeling better. I hate seeing you miserable.”
Dean raised an eyebrow. “You’re telling me you don’t want those kisses?”
“I do. But I want them out of love, not out of obligation.” He kissed the back of Dean’s hand. “Goodnight, Dean. I’ll see you in the morning.
—----
Castiel woke up feeling well-rested. It had been the best night’s sleep he had had in awhile. Maybe it was the fact that even after washing, the sheets still smelled faintly like Dean. Or maybe it was the satisfaction of knowing Dean was sleeping in sheets suffused with his scent. Castiel wasn’t immune to pride and seeing how much Dean enjoyed his scent pleased him.
Whatever the reason, he was up early and ready for a full day of tending to Dean. Now that Dean was showing signs of recovering his strength, he wasn’t going to have to tend to him too much. Hopefully Dean would have the energy to stay out of bed for most of the day.
Castiel poked his head into Dean’s bedroom. Dean was already awake, like usual. He still looked a little tired, but his eyes were clear and he didn’t look very sweaty anymore.
“Good morning, Dean. You smell happier today. I think your heat’s breaking.”
“I think so too. About damn time. Tomorrow everything should be back to normal and we’ll go back to our regularly scheduled lives.” Dean yawned and stretched. “Thank god. Just a few days of heat is exhausting. I wouldn’t be able to handle another week of this shit.”
“Would you like me to bring you breakfast or are you feeling good enough to come sit at the table?”
“I’m not that hungry yet. Can you actually bring me a blanket? It’s a little chilly in here.”
“I could turn the thermostat back up.”
Dean frowned. “You adjusted the thermostat?”
“I’m so sorry,” Castiel said. “I should have mentioned it earlier. I’ll of course pay any difference in the electric bill this month and-”
Dean waved a hand dismissively. “I’m not worried about it. But why would you do that? I’m the only one who needs it cold in here.”
“It’s your house and you’re the one in heat. I wanted you to be as comfortable as possible no matter where you went in the house.”
“But then you’d be cold.”
“That’s fine. Sweaters exist.”
Dean’s eyes went wide and he gave Castiel a once-over as if just realizing for the first time that he was wearing the sweater he always teased him about. “Oh, I’ve been a giant asshole. How could I have let you suffer for me?”
“Dean, my love, putting on a sweater is hardly suffering. I’m happy to do it. I’d wear a winter coat if need be. Anything for you.”
Dean held his arms out. “Aw, come here, you big sap.”
Castiel settled himself into Dean’s nest and allowed Dean to pull him down beside him and wrap his arms around him. God, he had missed Dean’s hugs. They were always as full of love and warmth as Dean himself.
Dean buried his face in the crook of Castiel’s neck and inhaled. “Ah, you smell so good.”
“So do you.”
Dean snorted. “I smell like a week’s worth of unwashed gym shorts.”
“That’s not true. You bathed last night.”
Dean blinked. “I did, didn’t I? Well, this is a nice change of pace. Usually I drag myself out of my nest after my heat and I want to burn the whole place down because everything just reeks. I feel like I have to shower for an hour before I get all the layers of sweat off me, wash all my clothes a few times, and scrub every inch of the house before the stench of heat is gone. But you’ve been keeping on top of things for me. Tomorrow I can just take it easy instead of doing a bunch of cleaning.”
“I’m glad I could make your heat easier. And I’d be happy to come over and help you through your next heat if you’d like.”
“Hell yeah. Now you’re talking. You made the bane of my existence into something almost tolerable. It’s better than I could ever have hoped.”
“I’m glad,” Castiel said.
“And next time you go into rut, I need to return the favor.”
“You don’t have to,” Castiel said quickly. “This isn’t a quid pro quo situation.”
“Nah, I want to. I may not be a typical omega in a lot of regards, but I’ve got the stereotypical caretaking trait. I’d be happy to fuss over you and cook you some actual meals. So, how bout it?”
“It won’t be for a few months. I have a very low sex drive. I go into rut maybe twice a year, if that.”
“So? I’d still like to be able to help when the time comes. Not hands-on help, of course. But I’d like to keep you company while you’re going through it. I mean, unless you’re one of those alphas that goes into crazy intense ruts to make up for not having them as often. I’m not going to stick around and watch you hump the couch.”
“Oh, no. My ruts are always very mild. I wake up with an erection, but that’s purely a physical response. I don’t feel a strong urge to engage in sexual activity and for the most part, I can ignore it and go about my normal, daily activities. I’m still required to stay home from work because obviously I can’t walk around the office with an erection, but it’s more of an inconvenience than anything else.”
Dean snickered. “Oh, I’m definitely coming over next time you go into rut then. I can already picture you shuffling into the kitchen first thing in the morning being your usual grumpy self, looking down at your dick and then getting even grumpier.”
Castiel rolled his eyes. “I’m glad you find my suffering a source of entertainment.”
Dean’s smile faded. “I’m sorry, Cas. I’m not trying to mock your sex drive or lack thereof. That’d be a dick move, especially after how understanding you’ve been.”
“It’s alright, Dean,” Castiel said. “I know there’s no malicious intent. You’re just teasing me for not being a morning person.”
“That’s not really it either. You can’t help that you’re not made for mornings and I’m trying not to make fun of something you can’t control. But for some reason it just kills me how much you hate mornings and how it contrasts so much with the rest of your personality. You’re usually so even-keeled and level-headed, but if you have to do anything before 8 a.m., you’re grumpier than my Uncle Bobby. I’ve seen you glare at the sun like it’s personally offended you and you want to smite it on principle. I don’t know how you can sustain an erection because I’m sure if you glared at your dick with even half of the rage you have for mornings, it’d shrivel up on the spot. But maybe my anti-sex hormones will do the trick.”
“It’s a possibility,” Castiel said. “We should test that hypothesis during my next rut. I’ll still have to stay home from work, but it’ll probably be easier to get things done when I’m not constantly having to adjust myself.”
“Awesome,” Dean said. “I’ll make you some bomb-ass bacon cheeseburgers. I’ll even teach you how to make them yourself.”
“So then I can make them for you for your next heat.”
Dean smirked. “If your rut really won’t come for a few months, I might end up giving you cooking classes before that. Because I’m not going to accept bacon bits during my next heat. The sacrilege stops here.”
Castiel rolled his eyes. “If you say so.”
“Yeah, well. I do say so. And that’s the most important thing.” He yawned. “Hey, you mind staying in bed for a little while? This actually feels really comfortable and I might fall back asleep. But if you need to go-”
“I have nowhere else I need to be,” Castiel said firmly. “I’m here for as long as you need me.”
“Love you, babe. You’re the best.” Dean snuggled into Castiel’s chest and within seconds, his breathing evened out and his body went lax.
