Chapter Text
Shinsou
Shinsou watched Monoma from across the coffee table in his bedroom. It was late afternoon; class was finished for the day, and they were supposed to be studying. Neither wanted to do that. Shinsou’s unopened textbook spoke for itself, and Monoma was lying on the floor, staring up at the ceiling. He was thinking about something. Shinsou had spent enough time around him to know by the way his eyebrows were slightly knitted together and lips in a soft pout.
Monoma had a face Shinsou could never get tired of looking at. It was almost sinful how perfect he was. But, there was so much more to Monoma’s beauty than just his face. Everything about him was beautiful. Inside and out. He was enchanting and alluring, kind and gentle hearted, loved his friends unconditionally, and was wildly loyal. Even Monoma’s incredibly offputting laugh was like music to Shinsou’s ears.
If it was possible to be addicted to someone, then he was addicted to Monoma.
After joint training with class A and B, Shinsou was wrapped around Monoma’s finger without him trying. They exchanged numbers, and were inseparable ever since. From early morning jogs to late night study sessions, Shinsou and Monoma did it together. Their friendship developed into something deep and personal. They weren’t just peers anymore; they were best friends.
And two years later, Shinsou wanted more than that. He just wasn’t sure if Monoma did too.
Well, maybe. Shinsou wasn’t sure—reading minds wasn’t his Quirk, unfortunately. He also didn’t have the guts to ask. Instead of risking the loss of their friendship, Shinsou decided not to tell Monoma a thing.It was better that way. At least, that’s what he told himself—even though sometimes, Shinsou couldn’t help but wonder if maybe Monoma did feel the same.
It was impossible to tell. Monoma was good to all his friends. Shinsou wasn’t sure if he received special treatment in comparison. They spent their free time together. Monoma would check in on him after training with Aizawa, knowing Shinsou always overworked himself. He’d bring snacks and they’d sit and chat. Monoma knew his favorite things, from food to basic stuff like preferable colors. And every morning before class, he cooked the two of them breakfast.
Was that something normal friends did?
His thoughts were spiraling again, so distracting that Shinsou couldn’t hear the words Monoma was speaking to him while still lying on the floor. He was utterly plagued by his feelings for his best friend, and his subconscious was begging him to say something.
“Are you paying attention?” Monoma asked.
“I think I’m in love with you.”
The words fell out before he could stop them. Shinsou’s eyes widened as his brain caught up with his mouth, and his chest tightened from embarrassment.
Monoma sat up and stared at him. Shinsou stared back. Silence hung between them. It was suffocating. Uncomfortable. Unlike anything he ever experienced while in Monoma’s company.
Shinsou wanted to slam his head against a wall. He knew he was awkward. He had been his whole life. But this? This was beyond awkward. Especially since Monoma had yet to say anything in return.
There was only one solution in Shinsou’s stupid mind that could temporarily soothe the pain of his word vomit:
Running away.
And that’s exactly what he did. Shinsou stood up, said nothing, turned on his heel, and high tailed it out the door of his own dorm room.
His hands were clammy and his heart beat heavily in his ribcage, threatening to break through his bones. Shinsou still couldn’t believe he just… just admitted his feelings in the worst way possible.
And he had nowhere to go. Nowhere to process that he ruined his and Monoma’s friendship in the matter of seconds. He couldn’t hide in his room, not when he voluntarily left while Monoma was still there.
Idiot.
He was a complete idiot.
Unsure where to go, Shinsou decided the best thing he could do was disappear. He wished he could forever, but that wasn’t possible. Class A and B spent a good amount of time around each other; he’d be seeing Monoma again much sooner than he’d like.
He needed to collect his thoughts. Then he’d have the guts to face him. But, for now? Shinsou was gonna run away like the emotionally stunted man he was.
The elevator brought him down to the common area of the dorms. There were more people than Shinsou’d like to see. He tried to pass by everyone, eyes glued to the door, but hearing his name stopped him in his place.
“Hey, Shinsou!”
Shit.
He turned to see Uraraka, Ashido, and Sero sitting on the couch. All three had concerned looks on their faces.
“Are you alright?” Uraraka asked, tilting her head to the side.
No, he was not alright. He was a disaster. A gay disaster.
“Want to sit with us?” Ashido patted the seat beside her, looking just as concerned as Uraraka.
Shinsou shook his head. “I’m good. Just going for… a jog.”
“A jog?” Uraraka took inventory of Shinsou’s choice in clothes; a plain t-shirt and jeans.
He wasn’t dressed for a jog. At all. Shinsou wondered if he could be any dumber. But, he had to stand by his poor excuse of a lie.
“Yep.”
Both girls looked confused, and Sero simply shrugged.
“Bye.” Shinsou turned on his heel and sped walked to the door, not wanting to be stopped by anyone else.
He slipped on his shoes and left the dorms wanting to punch himself in the face, and wondering what in the hell he was going to do.