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Summary
Q is suddenly being thrust into the field despite being entirely unprepared and unwilling to, y'know, die. He discovers a loophole to avoid this, but unfortunately, it requires another type of thrust; he must pretend that he's in a salacious affair with James Bond. He's desperate to be caught in a compromising position, but somehow, he just can't manage it.
Or: Five times Q tries to get caught necking Bond and one time that he actually does.
