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Regretful Wishes

Summary:

Be careful what you wish. Shinya learns this the hard way.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

You know this city, not so far away? Down there is a street called No. 6. There, on that street, is a place where it’s fun to come. It’s right next to that restaurant called Hetalian Foods. It’s a bar, it’s called Shinya’s Bar. The owner’s name is Hiiragi Shinya. He always stands by the counter. By the door, you will usually see a woman named Awashima Seri. She is the one to kick you out if you are causing trouble. Sometimes she won’t be there though. In those cases, you’ll see Heiwajima Shizuo there instead. He is crazy strong but hates violence. Somewhere in the bar, usually in the background, you’ll find a young man named Max Alors. He always has a broom in his hand. He always seems to be working on cleaning the place, and it is needed. If you go behind the counter, you’ll find a door, behind that, you’ll find a hallway. If you follow that, you will reach a kitchen with the chef, Nanase Haruka, in a bathtub on wheels. This is pushed around by his friend, Matsuoka Rin.

In this bar, many strange costumers come by. You might know a few of them, and usually, a lot of crazy stuff happens.


 

Awashima and Max were sitting around in the practically dead bar. There had been no one by for days already. Today, Shinya didn’t even bother to come and be behind the counter. Instead he was down in the kitchen, deciding that Rin and Haruka needed a change of pace. Plus, he had some thoughts he would like to share with them.

“Don’t you think you should be up in the bar?” Haruka commented. None of them had said a word since Shinya entered. Shinya hadn’t said anything because he had waited for one of them to start the conversation. Now, Haruka had finally done it.

“Well, yeah,” Shinya stretched his body lazily. “But there is no one up there, and no one seems to come. It’s been empty for days!”

“Then try and draw in some customers,” Rin said.

“I would if I could,” Shinya said. Then a thoughtful look appeared on his face. “What if you dressed up in a maid-costume, Rin-rin? I’m sure that would draw in some.” He smiled teasingly as Rin frowned at the comment.

“Over my cold, dead body,” he said. “Have Haru do it, he doesn’t care anyway, or Awashima-san. I’m sure she’d do it.”

Shinya shook his head. “Relax, Rin-rin. It was nothing more than a joke. I actually have a way of drawing in some customers, but I’m not sure it’ll work,” he said.

“What way is that?” Rin asked.

Shinya flipped a 5 yen coin in his hand. “I’ve heard, if you wish upon a god, and pay him 5 yen, he will come to grant your wish. So if I wish upon this god, Yato, who is rumored to grant any wish then I’m sure he will come to this bar… if the rumor is true, that is.”

“Then do it!” Rin demanded. “I can’t wait for you not to get bored.”

Shinya smiled and made his wish while flipping the coin in the air. It disappeared suddenly, and then the sound of the door into the bar being opened was heard loud and clear.

“It seems it worked,” Shinya said. “Excuse me.” He smiled widely as he left the kitchen to go to his post.

When Shinya entered, he could already see two standing by the counter. One was a guy wearing a tracksuit. The most remarkable about him was his incredibly blue eyes. They were almost glowing. The other was younger, nothing more than a boy in his early teens. Nothing in his clothing stood much out, his hair was blonde though. It wasn’t something Shinya saw very often on a kid.

“Hello and welcome!” Shinya said, cheerfully as he looked at the two.

“Hello!” the tracksuit-guy said. “Delivery God Yato at your service.”

Shinya smiled. “I’ll be doing the service here,” he said.

The tracksuit-guy, Yato, looked confused. “Weren’t you the one making a wish for me to come here?” he asked.

“Yeah, I did,” Shinya answered. This caused Max and Awashima to exchange looks, indicating that they should’ve known this from the start.

“Then, what should I come here for?” Yato asked.

Shinya smiled happily. “You just have to come and be a customer at this bar!” he said, like it was obvious.

Yato seemed to think that over. “Come and be a customer. So… as a customer, does that mean I can do whatever I want?” he asked.

“Yeah, I guess so?” Shinya said.

A smile grew on Yato’s face whereas the boy got this irritated expression. It seemed that he knew what was about to come, and wasn’t too happy about it. Later on, Shinya should find that he didn’t blame the boy for thinking so.

“Then… can I have all your money?” Yato asked.

Shinya blinked. “All our money?” he asked.

The boy sighed. “That’s not how it works…” he mumbled before taking a few steps back.

“I need money for my shrine!” Yato said, trying to justify his request.

“No,” Shinya answered. “You can order anything you want and I’ll give it to you, that’s how it works, don’t you know?” he asked.

“He does,” The boy said. “He’s just being dumb.”

“What’s that supposed to mean!” Yato turned to yell at the boy.

“Exactly what it sounds like,” the boy answered.

Yato ignored it and turned back to Shinya. “So can I have the money or a shrine?” he asked.

Shinya shook his head. “None of them. But you can order any drink you want. We have this special drink with cola, redbull and some other really good stuff!” he said in an attempt to encourage the god to buy something.

“What’s that other good stuff?” Yato asked. His eyes were sparkling with interest. It seemed it had worked.

“What money are you planning on using?” the boy asked dryly.

Yato thought. “Do you have any, Yukine?” he asked.

The boy, Yukine, shook his head. “You spent all of them on a ring for yourself, remember?” he asked.

Shinya started thinking. He was starting to feel that he needed to think of the boy, since the boy seemed to be the one who was caused trouble with Yato.

“Okay,” Shinya said. “Here’s a deal. I’ll let you get this drink for free if you go and tell anyone you meet how good it was.”

Yato seemed to think about that for a while and then smiled. “Then you put a poster up and recommend my service to every one of your customers,” he said.

Shinya thought about that. “That’s asking two things for the price of one,” he said.

“I came here, isn’t that two for two?” Yato asked.

“I paid you 5 yen for that,” Shinya said.

“What are they getting at?” Max asked Awashima. The two of them had moved and were now standing by the wall, watching everything play out in front of them.

“I don’t know,” Awashima said. “I’m not even sure how this will end…” She turned to the boy. “What do you think?” she asked.

“Uh?” the boy looked up at Awashima. “About what?” he asked.

Yato’s face immediately flushed red and he turned around. “Stop thinking such perverted thoughts. I thought they were only reserved for Hiyori!” he yelled.

“I’m not thinking perverted!” Yukine yelled. “If it’s anyone, it’s you!”

“What!” Yato yelled, but then his gaze was drawn to Awashima’s breasts as she moved closer, towards him. He was already being way too loud for her liking and she had a feeling that this wouldn’t end well for anyone unless something was done, regardless of how it happened.

“I wonder who the pervert is…” Yukine mumbled as Yato started blushing, unable to look anywhere else but at the breasts under the blue fabric.

“I’ve had it with you,” Awashima simply said before she stepped closer to Yato.

The god got up and started backing away, towards the door that led outside. Before he was completely out, Awashima stepped back and kicked him the last bit of the way out. He hit the building across from the bar, full force.

Yukine smiled at everyone. “I think he has at least learned one lesson…” he said. Then he too left the bar and closed the door behind him.

“And that’s that,” Shinya said. “Remind me to not wish for a god to come by ever again,” he told Max and Awashima before he went back to the kitchen to piss off Rin some more. At least he had gotten inspiration of how to be annoying.

Notes:

This idea came from a drink created by myself and a good friend. It caused us to go all out in weirdness (Search "Princess Yuu-chan" and you'll see the results) and we blamed Shinya. There's not much of a good reason except we suggested he'd messed with our drinks (because there was cola in it) and eventually we came up with the idea about Shinya owning a bar and then some people come by and stuff happens.
There are a lot of other series included so it's a major crossover series. Though, if there's something you are not interested in reading, the stories can be read separately. This is also why the introduction paragraphs are the same in all the stories.
Thanks for reading this weird thing.

Jackie

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