Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

I am everywhere, everything, everyone and every time. I am.

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There were very few reasons to live for Jayce.

Logically, he knew that dying simply wasn’t great; to say the least. Whatever happened after one died was something everyone sooner or later would come to find out, but nobody could tell him at the moment; it was an enigma that Jayce wasn't in a hurry to discover. Still, he found himself looking down on a broken apartment, ready to throw it all away to find some semblance of rest. 

If there wasn't anything at the end of the tunnel, all the better.

He had lost everything that he found worth living for. His research, the respect of his fellow citizens, his dignity. Nothing else was compelling to him later. When he looked inside, deep in his soul, there was nothing but a dark void. Not even the thought of leaving his mother alone could stop him anymore.

Then; as if God existed, Viktor had walked into the ruins of his apartment, some sort of guardian angel. He had talked to councilor Medarda, a few hours later the council had changed his mind and his research was back on track, now with the help of a new partner.

Near the end of the night, when the sun was about to wake up, Jayce found himself back in that old apartment, this time any thought of death seemed abhorrent to him. He had found again a reason to stay.

“Are you going to sleep here?” Viktor approached, that soft accent snuggling to every phoneme out of his mouth.

Jayce chuckled, “Seems like I don’t have any other option.” He was in a precarious situation, yet, he felt as if he was floating. Finally, the pieces within his mind fell into place perfectly with a soft click. Everything he wanted, it seemed within reach, he just had to extend his hand and grab it.

“I know a good hotel nearby; cheap too. But you’ll have to go alone. It has a reputation of being a place for lovers.” Viktor tilted his head slightly to the side. His body elegantly posed in contrapposto while his hand rested on his cane. “We wouldn't want everyone talking about us so soon after the research has been approved again.”

“I would have to hear those lovers then, and I really don’t want to. It’s fine, I’ll manage, it's almost morning again anyway.”

He could go to his mother’s place, but a part of him was still hurt after what she said. Jayce didn’t want to see her, at least for a while.

“Then, I live close by, my couch is quite comfortable, enough to fall asleep without your back wanting to murder you the next day. I also have some spare blankets, if you are interested.”

Jayce turned to him, his amber eyes glowing in the darkness. “I wouldn’t want to impose on you, Viktor.”

“Impose?” He smiled, his lips wrapping around crooked teeth, it should’ve looked ugly; instead it looked charming. “I believe it was you who said we are partners now, everything that is mine will be yours too and vice versa.”

Jayce wanted to tell him that being business partners didn’t necessarily extend to every other aspect of their life, that they just met, and what Viktor just said sounded a lot like marriage.

Jayce now had a lot of reasons to live for. He wanted to continue his research, he wanted to see what good could he do in the lives of others, he wanted to be in a science book as one of the big men in history. He wanted to tell everyone who ever doubted him to suck it and more.

But neither love nor friendship ever figured on the list of things worth living for, even less dying for. Jayce simply wasn’t that kind of man.

He smiled, “Of course, partner.”

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Caitlyn looked outside the window as the carriage moved. The weather was particularly warm, and the day was lively, not that Caitlyn paid much attention to it.

Her mind was mostly occupied by her visit to her brother, Jayce.

Jayce wasn't her brother by blood. He was merely an extravagant scientist that her mother once saw as a good investment, there wasn't a blood connection between them at all. The only reason they've ever met was chance. 

When she was around 8, she saw him in their living room, waiting for her mother, then they began talking thanks to her not having anything better to do. She had been only a small child, but even then she understood on an instinctual level that there was something wrong with him, in the same way there was something wrong with herself.

When Caitlyn's mother entered the room, she saw them laughing together. Unfortunately for Jayce, Cassandra asked him to look after Cait. It was just a favor according to her parents; a favor Jayce couldn't say no to, even if he had wanted. 

She used to joke that she had asked her parents for a dog, and they gave her Jayce; it took a painfully long time for her to realize how much that hurt Jayce.

They had been very close once, but that had stopped thanks to an attack years ago, an explosion that almost killed Jayce's scientific partner, Viktor.

Viktor was a thin man that spoke in whispers, almost as if his words were meant to be a secret. He had big doe eyes the color of honey, and he moved with an air of shame that only prideful people could have.

Caitlyn hadn't talked much with the man; only a few words here and there while they both happened to be at Jayce's lab at the same time. Yet she knew that Jayce and him were close. It was then understandable when Jayce had retreated into a house he recently bought in the countryside to take care of Viktor.

After that, any form of communication between the siblings had stopped, until Caitlyn sent him a letter asking if she could visit him.

Truth to be told, there were other motives behind her sudden interest in her brother's well-being, there had been some disappearances in the adjacent town, and she wanted to investigate. The fact that Jayce could offer her a place to stay for a few nights that was conveniently nearby was merely a bonus she wasn't about to ignore.

A few hours of traveling passed, and she felt the energy around her shift, almost imperceptibly so, like she had unknowingly stepped into a minefield.

The carriage stopped and Cait walked out of it, her gaze turned up, towards the house. 

The Talis' state wasn't small by any means, but it wasn't big either. Recently built by Jayce after the salary of councilor really started to dribble in. It screamed nouveau riche, and it lacked all the refinement and sophistication only generations of wealth could give.

Caitlyn herself had been there at the first party Jayce threw to celebrate the new house. It had looked as big, ostentatious and unapologetic tacky as Jayce had been back then.

She remembered rivulets of gold cascading down the granite on the walls, calling attention to themselves by just being themselves. No meaning behind those artistic choices, only the act of looking good for the sake of looking good. Just like Jayce back then. Just like Piltover itself.

However, the house she found in front of her, it was a completely different beast.

Caitlyn knew by logic that houses were set objects within time, as immutable as an object can be; which, in turn, wasn't a lot, but certainly it shouldn't have changed so much in a couple of years. Yet, as Cait observed the building, it seemed completely different from her memories.

A gloom covered everything, imperceptible, cold, almost as if the house found itself in a particular bad mood that day.

She would've sworn that the windows turned to regard her the moment her foot touched the ground, the curtains slightly open to take a peak. Of course that was completely ridiculous, but it did make her uncomfortable.

Cait waited outside for a few minutes while the driver put her suitcases on the ground. Then up the carriage he went and vanished in the distance, still nobody came out to receive her.

After another couple minutes of waiting, she decided to give up and simply go knock on the door, she would need to have a stern talk with Jayce's staff.

As she was walking forward, the door opened and there was Jayce.

He looked… different.

With a beard, long hair and black clothes, it seemed like he had been through hell and came back not quite the same nor quite sane.

Jayce was intimidating. Before the attack, he always seemed like smiling was something he had to force himself to do rather than doing it naturally. And such, every time he forgot to smile, he looked like he might punch someone at the minimum provocation. However, that man wasn't the Jayce Caitlyn was looking at. No, the Jayce in front of her simply looked too tired to care about any consequences.

Her brother smiled faintly; his skin grayish as if trapped for months in darkness, he extended his arms offering a hug to her. "Sprout."

Cait walked over to him and hugged him, but she could feel how he tensed. Nothing like the man she remembered, he always hugged her way too long with way too much enthusiasm. 

Jayce briefly patted her back. "I didn't expect you this early." He walked around her and towards her suitcases, she saw shining metal against fabric, a brace on Jayce's leg. 

"Is that like the one Viktor used?"

Jayce stopped for a moment, before looking down at what she was pointing out, he nodded and forced a smile. "Yes, I hurt my leg some months ago."

“Doing?”

Jayce shook his head, “I was repairing the house, I fell from the roof.”

Caitlyn hummed as Jayce picked up her things. "And where's your staff? I've been waiting for at least 10 minutes and nobody has come here to receive me."

He cleared his throat and began walking towards the house with the luggage under his arms, "There's no staff, just me and Viktor." He stepped inside.

Caitlyn followed. "What? Why?"

He shrugged, "It's just how we both preferred it."

"Jayce, a house of this size, you need staff taking care of it."

"We're fine Cait."

She shook her head, "No, you are not, it's too much work for two people, and that's assuming that Viktor isn't indisposed. It would be impossible for just one person to take care of it."

"I manage."

"The house will rot, Jayce."

He stopped, sighed and turned to her. "I don't think Viktor would want people seeing him... In his current state."

Cait stopped, she hadn't considered it, "Is he ok?"

"As ok as he can be... Really Cait, I appreciate the concern, but I won't let others see him like that."

Cait sighed, she nodded, "I understand."

Did she truly understand? Not really, but she thought she ought to understand. At the very least her mother would've understood if she had been alive, but then again, there was a reason she always fought with her mother.

They kept walking, through the dense corridors up the narrow stairs, shadows walked alongside them. Cait had a weird feeling that something was watching her, even when through the darkness of the house; nothing with eyes could've seen her.

Finally, Jayce stopped, put her clothes down and opened a random door. 

It was a big empty room, dark and blue, aggressive in its impassiveness. Cait couldn't help but shiver, hugging her black mourning dress. It was cold, though outside the sun was shining.

Jayce seemed unaffected by it. He moved the suitcases inside. "Please, take your time to settle in, sleep a little if you want, I'll come back to get you when dinner is ready."

Cait breathed deeply, "And Viktor? He'll accompany us to dinner?"

"If he isn't feeling too bad today, I'm sure he'll love to."

She nodded, and Jayce wordlessly stepped outside and closed the door behind him. There was something different about him that she couldn't quite name.

But he isn't the only one who changed.

Cait briefly touched her face, over the black eye patch she now wore; a name came to mind.

Sighing and shaking her head, she walked over to the only window in the room to pull the curtains open and let some sunlight in. It seemed as if the house itself refused to have even the littlest levity.

After that, she dragged her suitcase to the bed, dropped it on top and opened it, grabbing a little notebook, flipping through its pages.

The real reason she had gone to that place, a series of mysterious disappearances.

First, it started some years, when 10 children disappeared at the same time without any sort of trace. Then, three months later, a man went out at night to drink, never to come back. Three months later, a prostitute was reported as missing by coworkers, and so on.

The disappearances followed a pattern of 3 months, that was until they stopped being reported by the people in town. Recently a man had said that his cousin who lived there suddenly stopped sending letters, when he asked around, everyone acted as if the man had never existed in the first place.

Caitlyn had talked with Marcus; her superior within the enforcers, about how weird that was. He simply answered that she was seeing patterns where there were none, and it probably was a series of coincidences. Either way, it wasn't like that town fell into their jurisdiction.

Now she found herself in that strange house, technically off duty. 

She went through the few notes she had about the cases; the case, before yawning, it had been a long journey after all. 

The bed looked so invitingly soft, what harm could it cause to lay down for a moment?

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I am everywhere, everything, everyone and every time. I am.

With a gasp, Cait woke up. She looked around her room, but it was as empty as she remembered. She could've sworn that there was the heavy gaze of someone on her as she slept.

At that precise moment, a knock on the door made her jump, but Jayce's reassuring voice reached her.

"Sprout? It's time for dinner."

Cait nodded, then noted that Jayce couldn't see her through the door. "Yes, I'll go in a minute."

"Hurry up, I need to show you the way."

Caitlyn stood up and with her hand she tidied up her dress a bit. "Of course, I'm coming."

Her tired steps followed her to the door and opened it. There, Jayce was right outside the door, waiting for her.

He looked tired, "You were sleeping? Sorry for waking you up."

Cait blushed, "It was only for a few moments." Her mother would've screamed at her for looking disheveled in front of her host.

Jayce smiled. "It was a long trip and I told you to rest," he moved his head towards the left, "C'mon, let's go have dinner."

Through the dark hallways their steps echoed, and even when the walls were tense and oppressive, somehow they relaxed once they noticed who was walking there, as if Jayce's presence was calming to the house itself. 

She breathed deeply and followed him, ignoring the chill going down her spine. After a few moments, they arrived in the dining room, which was dimly illuminated with several candles.

"There has been a problem with the electrical grid I'm afraid." Jayce rushed to pull out a chair for Cait, acting again as if he was a mere servant for her mother. "There can be a few lightbulbs on, but they burn out quickly, so I rather use mostly candles, I hope that's ok."

That would explain the darkness.

"What about my room? There's one there." She sat down with some stiffness, the cold didn't help.

"Don't worry, I changed it yesterday, it should last as long as you're here, but I'll give you a few candles just in case."

She nodded, and Jayce walked away, before returning with a tray full of food and different empty plates.

"I'm sorry, but since there's no staff here, I have to cook myself and I figured it would be easier if I let you take as much food as you want to."

Cait frowned, "all of this is for me? Won't you and Viktor accompany me?"

Jayce chuckled, "It's supposed to be for the three of us, just take what you'll eat. Let me go bring Viktor now, just wait a few minutes, but help yourself Sprout. Don't wait for us"

After that, he quickly walked out of the room.

Cait sighed, she knew that Jayce wasn't exactly born and raised in civil society, and a lot of manners and traditions were lost on him or seemed nonsensical. Still, Cait thought that he ought to try to do better; put a little effort in what people will say about him. She quickly shook her head, realizing that she sounded just like her mother. With a firm grip on her plate, she got up and grabbed a plate before starting to select which food she wanted.

A soft thumping noise just at her side, so quiet, had she not been alone, she wouldn't have heard it. Cait stopped moving and looked around, trying to find the source, before noticing that there was a pattern to the sound. 

Thump-thump, thump-thump, a heartbeat.

She got up and walked to a wall, leaning towards it to hear it better.

Thump-thump, thump-thump.

It seemed to be coming from within the structure.

Lifting a hand, Cait reached out, to touch the pulsing wall—

Clack, clack, clack.

Wheels hitting on the floor, she turned around and found Jayce walking towards her. He was pushing Viktor, who was currently sitting on a wheelchair with a plushie of a little white lamb on his lap.

"Is something the matter, Sprout?" Jayce asked, he took Viktor to the table across Cait's seat.

"No, I just heard a noise, it must've been Viktor's wheelchair."

Jayce nodded. "Well, here he is. Though he probably won't say much."

Cait nodded, she approached Viktor with a calculated smile, "Good to see you again, Viktor. Do you remember me?"

He looked at her once, merely nodded and kept playing with the lamb on his lap.

"He's feeling a bit down on energy, I hope you understand." Jayce amended, he grabbed a plate and began filling it with food. 

Cait merely nodded and forced a smile. It wasn't Viktor's fault that he was like… that.

She sat down back at her place, and for his part, Jayce sat at Viktor's side with the plate full of food. He began feeding him slowly, like one would feed a little baby.

Cait pretended not to see that and went back to her own food. It must be embarrassing for a grown man to have to be taken care of like one would a babe; and if not for Viktor, for Jayce. 

The click-clack of the utensils against the ceramic were the only sounds for a moment.

"So, you didn't mention in your letter why you decided to come to visit us. Might I ask you why?"

She cleared her throat, "I hadn't heard about you in a while."

"It is only that?" Jayce stopped, he grabbed a napkin and used it to clean Viktor's mouth. “I understand if it isn't.”

"It was mostly that."

"Mostly."

The food was some sort of soup with vegetables and meat. "There's something I want to investigate."

"What is it?" Jayce's gaze was focused on Viktor, but it seemed like his attention was to her.

"There have been some disappearances in the nearby town; it's not that far away from here, and I figured I could also visit you."

Jayce hummed. "Are you sure it's a good idea to investigate?"

Cait frowns, "What do you mean?"

"It's just that it seems dangerous, don't you think? Better not to mess with things like that."

"I can take care of myself."

At that, Viktor laughed, it was so soft, she might've been able to confuse it with silence. But not, it was an honest laugh.

Jayce sighed, "Well, I hope you are able to find who killed those people."

“We don't know if they're dead yet.”

“Or find them.

Cait looked at the soup in front of her, her stomach wasn't so agreeable at the moment. "Tomorrow I'm going into town to ask around."

"Good luck with that, people in the town can be uncooperative."

"I'm used to that."

"Glad to hear."

"Are you going to eat something or?"

Jayce moved the food with the spoon, "Oh, don't worry, I'm used to eating after Viktor is finished… It has been normal for me ever since… you know…"

The air felt sluggish, she just wanted to sleep. "How are things going here? Everything's well?" She muttered, trying to fill the silence between them.

"As well as things can be..." Jayce looked at some point in front of him, lost in his mind, "It's... Quiet, out here, near the woods, you know. At night, you can barely hear a thing from the town."

Cait kept eating.

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After dinner, Jayce accompanied her back to the room while pushing Viktor’ wheelchair.

"Thank you," Cait said, "I will remember the way soon."

"Sleep well, sprout, I'm sure you feel exhausted after a long day."

"Good night Jayce, good night Viktor."

Viktor looked up from his wheelchair, he smiled and squeezed the little lamb toy in his lap. "Don't look, no matter what you hear."

Cait frowned, "What do you mean?"

Jayce chuckled nervously. "The humidity is very high during this time of year, the wood creaks a lot, so don't get scared if you hear weird noises at night. He's just giving you advice to sleep well."

"Oh. Thanks, Viktor."

He nodded and hugged the lamb to his chest.

"Goodnight Cait," Jayce hurriedly began pushing Viktor away without even waiting for her response.

“Good night again!” She called them, but doubted that they had heard her, so she decided to just enter the room and closed the door behind her.

Rubbing her one eye, thoughts began invading her mind.

She thought about Violet, how she had almost spat on her face and turned away because of the deal she had made with Ambessa.

"You are nothing but a pig like her. I don't know why I thought you would be different."

It wasn't a deal she made because she wanted to, she had to! And if Violet couldn't see that, then—

But what if she is right?

Cait shook her head and sighed, looked around the room, feeling as if suddenly her soul was underwater. Everything was so artificial. 

In her mind, the idea of some time focused on something else while spending time with Jayce, would make her see things more clearly. She made the right choice and Vi was wrong. Why didn't it feel like that?

With a huff, she began getting ready for bed with stiff movements. First, she unpacked her nightgown. Second, she took off her dress. Third, she put on the nightgown. Fourth, she took off her eye patch. Fifth. She turned off the light and went to bed.

It was unnecessary for her to think.

The sheets were silk, soft, and cold to the touch, a deep rich ultramarine blue so that the bed mimicked the sea. She got under the blanket and felt the sounds moving with her, the peaceful feeling of the weights on top of her began lulling her to sleep. 

She closed her singular eye, and breathed in the silence of the room.

After a few minutes, a shiver ran down her spine; there was again the unsettling feeling of something watching her from before. Instead of taking it as a serious treat, Cait breathed deeply, trying to ease her mind, though she could've sworn that the room breathed with her. She shook her head, there must be nothing, just the anxiousness of sleeping in an unknown room.

"Don't look, no matter what you hear."

It was probably one of Viktor's jokes to scare her at night. Even when she was young, Viktor was never overly nice to her; no more than necessary, always resenting the status of power her family had. He would go ahead and tell her horrible horror stories about ghosts in Zaun to get her to have nightmares while Jayce wasn't looking. Or he would prank her by putting fake blood and pretending to be dead when she went alone to visit Jayce.

Not much had changed.

With a closed eye, Cait grabbed her pillow and put it on top of her head to sleep.

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His mother was a particular person, like himself.

She always seemed so sweet and understanding, and to a point she was. Yet after everyone said their goodbyes and left them alone, she would always turn to him with a stare like iron.

There was the logical explanation that a woman like her had to be tough. The daughter of immigrants from Ixtal; an iron smith of top quality that was always treated like less because of her gender and ethnicity. Later also a widow and a mother carrying the whole weight of a house and a name that wasn’t hers.

All for Jayce’s sake.

But there was also that time after his father died when she crumbled like thin wet paper.

Ximena cried and cried for hours after she heard about the death of his father. Jayce didn’t understand that feeling. Of course he loved his father, but for some reason he just felt… Numb.

The memory was still all so consuming for him, his mother on her bed, the bed she had shared with his father, hugging an old unwashed jacket that smelled like him, wailing and cursing the man for leaving her.

It lasted all of a week. She barely ate, barely drank water or went to the bathroom. She just got up to make him something to eat and then went back to sleep. After all, her family being all back on Ixtal and his father being the only heir to house Talis, it left with nobody to care for Jayce.

Even “friends” turned their back on them after his father died.

After the week was done, she got up and went back to work. Worked long hours into the night, only to come back to drop in her bed. Turned out that carrying a name by yourself wasn’t an easy task, something Jayce would learn eventually.

Years later, Ximena had confessed that the only reason she didn’t died with her husband was Jayce. The love she felt for her son was somehow even more powerful than her wish to die.

She told him; when he was 19, that she hated his father. When questioned why, she simply said: “Because he left.”

Jayce then asked if she could tell his father something right now, what it would be?

“That I miss him, and I love him more than anything.”

She would go ahead then to make sure that his father’s portrait was clean, and the flowers by its side were always fresh. 

Truly an abhorrently irrational behavior, how could you say you hated someone, then act like that and state that you miss him?

I am everywhere, everything, everyone and every time. I am.

When he told Viktor about that, and many other irrational things about his mother that drove Jayce crazy. His partner would always laugh and call him childish.

As expected, he and his mother got along spectacularly when they met. At times, Jayce thought Viktor liked his mother more than he liked him.

One day, Viktor visited them and brought flowers. Two bouquets, one of pink carnations for Ximena, and the other yellow tulips; for his father’s portrait.

His mother had cried, not like he had done years ago; but cried nonetheless. After years and years of not shedding a single tear in front of anyone. That was when Jayce understood that there was something broken inside his mother’s heart that nothing or nobody could hope to repair.

Walking back to his apartment with Viktor. His partner looked pensive.

“I hope you don’t think there was anything wrong with the flowers.” Jayce murmured. “She loved them, it just… probably it reminded her of my father. That's all.”

Viktor hummed, then nodded, as if making up his mind, “Jayce, have you ever thought about having children?”

He stopped, and laughed, “Why that question all of a sudden?”

His partner shrugged, “It's just something that came to mind.”

“I’ve thought about it, but I don’t think I would be a good father, I’ve never had a good example of that growing up on account of my own being dead. So I'll probably suck ass at it.” 

“I think you would be an ok father, maybe not an excellent one, but good enough.”

“Thanks,” he began scratching the back of his neck with some embarrassment, “what about you?”

Viktor looked away, “it Is not whether I want to, it is just that I’ve never thought I would—” he bit his lips.

“That you would… Find the right woman to have children with?”

“Sure, woman…”

Jayce chuckled awkwardly, “I’m sure the right one will come along someday… Just wait and see.”

Viktor nodded, “If I ever have kids… I want a daughter, and I will name her Ximena.”

Jayce was surprised by that, it came out of nowhere. But he still smiled, “I’m sure my mom will love that.

His partner blushed, “Your mother… Is a spectacular woman” he murmured, “I don't think I would be able to go through what she has,” his face turned away from Jayce in hopes that he didn’t see the lovely pink on his face. “Losing the love of your life, must be worse than torture.”

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All things considered, Cait had a very nice night of sleeping, she didn't sleep very well in general, at least not since... Well, she just hasn't slept very well in a while.

But she was happy that despite everything, she got some rest and now was full of energy.

Quickly, she breathed deeply and jumped off the bed to get ready. Cait got dressed and walked out of the room, trying to guess which way was it to the dining room, when she saw Jayce walking towards her.

"Did you sleep well?"

"Like a baby."

"Glad to hear. I was going to come get you earlier, but I thought it was best to let you rest. Now, want me to take you to breakfast?"

She nodded, and they began walking together.

"Viktor will accompany us?"

Jayce shook his head, "No, we had breakfast earlier, and he's out now, getting some sunlight."

"Ah, yes, it seems like it's a nice day, isn't it?"

“Here it's always sunny.” He cleared his throat. "Would you like to accompany us outside after you're finished?"

"I'm afraid not, I'll go to the city to ask around about the missing people."

"You can take one of our horses if you want, the town isn't too close by foot."

"How far away is it?"

"50 minutes if you walk fast. And 70 if you don't."

"You've decided to live quite far away."

"Indeed.” He chuckled. “In the night, in the dark, nobody will come from the town if we need help, no one could even hear us. Since no one lives any nearer than that, nobody will come any nearer than that."

Cait laughed, "That's a very grim way to put it."

Jayce tilted his head to the side, "That's the truth, though."

"I imagine."

Finally, they arrived in the dining room, there was a plate with pancakes, another with fruit, and some juice and coffee at the side.

Jayce signaled to them, "I hope you enjoy your breakfast."

"So, you won't sit with me?"

"I'm sorry Sprout, I'll be with Viktor outside, but tell me when you need the horse and I'll get it ready for you."

Cait nodded and sat at the table, "Thank you, Jayce."

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Jayce's horse was an agreeable dapple grey mare called Nellie with a soft velvety nose and a quick gait. She soon arrived at town and left the horse at a hotel's stable, making sure she was well taken care of.

First thing First. She went to the enforcers' quarters to ask for any information about the case. As soon as she entered the building, she had the clear idea that those enforcers probably weren't particularly good at their job. Most of them were just either sleeping or happily playing cards.

She walked to the man behind a desk; seemed like he was the one in charge.

"Excuse me sir," she began, "I'm officer Kiramman, I was sent here by my superiors with orders to help in the investigation about the missing people. Can I see the documents of the cases, please?"

It wasn't true, however, he didn't need to know that.

The man on the other side of the desk looked at her for a moment, then chuckled. "Really? A pretty girl like you sent here to help? I don't really believe that."

Cait felt a sudden warmth on her face. "I'm the sole heir of the Kiramman family and my mother's seat on the council. Most of your salary comes from the donations my family makes towards the enforcers; if you don't do what I say, I'll make sure you never step foot here again."

The man didn't look impressed, he simply smiled and nodded before standing up and walking away. He returned with a bunch of paper and threw them over the desk.

"There's not much to begin with, all the leads dried up a while ago."

"I'll be the judge of that." Cait grabbed the papers and began reading them.

Truly, there actually wasn't much there.

First the 10 kids; they all were under the age of 10 and disappeared within 4 days from each other. Not any other pattern. Simply put, it looked like they vanished into thin air. 

The last people to see them were their family, but ultimately most of them had solid alibis so they were ruled out as suspects.

Nothing else.

The rest of the people? Homeless and or prostitutes that the town only noticed they were gone because they were somewhat known in the community. No leads on that. The report stopped just as it began. Judging by the complaint the man living in another town made about his brother disappearing, they probably stopped filling them a while back.

That meant that there might be more unknown victims.

If Cait's suspicions were right, and it was the same person behind all those crimes, then that meant that the killer knowingly targeted vulnerable people who could disappear without anyone missing them, at least after killing 10 children.

But then again, why children? And why stop at 10?

Something had to happen for the perpetrator to change his modus operandi; since all the victims after the children showed that the criminal probably tried to go for people at the edge of society, people that nobody would miss. It was easy to get away with murder when the victims were undesirables. But who wouldn't miss 10 children? Who wouldn’t notice that they’re gone one right after the other?

There was something behind that sudden change of victims, a reason behind the pattern, and maybe that was the weak link that Caitlyn was searching for.

"Well, anything interesting?" The enforcer in front of her asked.

She shook her head and returned the papers, "I'll ask around, I'll report later if I find something useful."

The guy chuckled, "good luck with that."

Caitlyn just sent him a heavy glare before walking out the building.

----------------------------------------------

It was a sunny day, barely any clouds in the blue sky and the sunlight warmed everything, yet its touch didn’t burn. Perhaps that was the problem to begin with.

When she began asking around, about the children, the other victims, if they knew anything about them and or if they had seen someone acting suspicious during the date of the disappearances. Nobody seemed to know what Cait was talking about.

They all denied everything, simply smiling and asking her if she had time yet to enjoy a thing or another about the town. But taking into account what the enforcer had said, it was probable that the people from the town simply weren't cooperative with outsiders.

She would have to win their trust if she wanted them to talk. However, at the moment it was late already, and Cait didn't want the night to catch her on her way back to the house, so against all her wishes, she went to retrieve Nellie and began the trek back.

As she approached the edge of town, she saw an old cabin at the edges, very close to the woods. At first she thought about ignoring it; but something in her gut told Cait that she shouldn't, there was something important.

She guided the horse towards it.

The lights inside were on, so it wasn't abandoned; though the house wasn't in the best condition either. Cait tried to stir Nellie closer, but for some reason she got spooked and refused to keep going.

Caitlyn looked around, there wasn't anything that could cause her a reaction like that. 

After a couple of minutes of thinking, she tied her to a tree and walked to the cabin. It was just a few meters away. 

When her feet touched the ground, she felt something weird around the house, looking around she noticed some off things. It looked as if the vegetation suddenly stopped in a circle around it, like someone had carefully salted the earth around the house to ensure that nothing grew. Cait could've sworn she saw the line where the grass suddenly became grey dirt.

Ignoring that, she got closer and noticed that there were some strange patterns carved onto the walls of the house. A few steps further, and she was in front of the door; she knocked.

"Who is it!?" The voice of an old woman echoed through the emptiness surrounding the house.

"I'm an enforcer, madam, I have some questions."

"And I don't have any answers! Go away and don't come back until you have a warrant!"

"It's..." Caitlyn stopped, perhaps mentioning the disappearances wasn't the best idea, she wouldn't get any answers by being that direct.

"What are those symbols carved in the walls?"

"Why!?"

"Well, it's just that I'm staying at House Talis, and it seems to me that—"

“What? What did you say?”

“I said that I’m staying at house Talis!”

“The house on top of the hills?”

“Yes.”

"Oh, Wait a second!"

Footsteps quickly approached, the door creaking open, showing an old grandma with a very homely appearance that made Cait feel more at ease.

"Why are you staying there?"

"Why? What's wrong?" Cait turned around and could see the enormous house in the distance.

The old woman looked at her like she was crazy, "You are either a very brave or very stupid little girl."

Cait pouted, she didn’t appreciate when strangers judge her without even knowing her. "I’m not—” She sighed, realizing that probably fighting with an old grandma in the woods wasn't the best idea. “My name is Caitlyn Kiramman, pleased to meet you." 

“Theodora” The woman hummed looking through half closed eyes as if examining her. "Runes."

"What?"

"Those," she pointed towards the walls of the house, "are runes, for protection."

"Oh, really?" Caitlyn immediately thought that the woman wasn't very mentally stable.

"Yeah, your God isn't the only one able to practice magic."

"My God?"

The woman shook her head, "I can't talk, it has 20 eyes already, probably more, and he's always listening."

I am everywhere, everything, everyone and every time. I am.

"Ok?"

The woman then pointed towards where Nellie was peacefully waiting for Cait, "He'll bring destruction; the bastard son of the arcane, it spat him out whole, but he wasn’t the only thing that got out."

Caitlyn tried to not laugh at what the woman was saying. "Ok, well, I think I should be going—"

"Did Viktor tell you something?" The woman interrupted.

Cait paused, did she know him, how? "He told me... He told me not to look, no matter what." A deep breath, "Do you know him?"

The woman's expression changed to one of worry, "Poor girl, I would give you a rune for protection, but I'm afraid it wouldn't do much, not in that house, not if he doesn’t want it to. You should do what he says if you want to stay safe."

"Are you implying that Viktor wants to hurt me? He can't even feed himself."

"I don't know." The woman said with complete sincerity, "but you should be careful anyway."

Cait swallowed saliva, "ok."

The woman looked at her, thinking for a moment. "Get going already, sweetheart, the night is dangerous around here."

Chapter Text

The food on Zaun was something Jayce always looked forward to the few times Viktor had invited him there. He always wore the Zaunites clothes Viktor had gifted him and kept his mouth shut: just like Viktor had advised him.

It was worth it though, the food there was always warm, hearty, and delicious. Nothing like the food on Piltover that was more focused on looking pretty than on tasting good. Taste was more of a bonus.

Jayce stretched as he walked back, he felt full and happy, a bit sleepy also. The warmth of the Piltovian summer in the sunset didn't help either.

Everything looked yellow in the golden hour while they walked together on the bridge, as if the cities had been dipped in honey. He sighed, “and that was what I said.”

Viktor nodded, he looked at the horizon.

Jayce focused his gaze on the enforcers at the end of the bridge, he knew that getting through them would be hard, especially when both of them looked like zaunites. It always took at least half an hour of them showing their documents and talking to convince them that they were living in Piltover and to let them in.

“Do you have your papers ready?” Jayce expected an answer, but when he was met with silence, he turned around to see that Viktor was no longer at his side. “Viktor?”

At the edge of the bridge, leaning on the railing, Viktor was facing the setting sun quietly. Jayce chuckled with relief and went to follow him.

“I didn't hear you walk away.”

Viktor shrugged, “I didn't want to be heard.”

Jayce went to his side and rested his hands on the railing. “What are we doing?”

“Looking at the sunset.”

“Why all of a sudden, if I can ask?”

“You can ask, that I answer is another completely different thing.” 

“C'mon V, you know what I mean.”

Viktor tilted his head slightly to the side, “Is something I realized I don't do a lot. Things that I've taken for granted for so long. Common things that didn't mean much, now I'm just realizing they are beautiful.”

Something caught on Jayce's throat at those words, he looked at the horizon too.

They stayed quiet for a while.

“Do you…” Viktor began, but quieted down after those words; he closed his eyes, breathed deeply and opened them again, “do you ever wonder about death?”

“About what exactly?”

“Just… Death, dying, decomposing.”

“In general?”

Viktor nodded.

“I guess I don't, not really, not a lot at least.” He chuckled, “that might be funny considering what I almost did that night in my apartment,” Jayce breathed deeply, “but it wasn't so much wanting to die as it was… No wanting to live anymore. You gave me back the things I live for.”

Viktor didn't answer, he simply kept looking towards the horizon.

“Why?”

He shook his head. “What do you think happens after we die?”

“I don't think there's anything, we simply disappear into nothing. We exist, then we don't, easy as ever. Our consciousness simply goes to sleep and we are faced with the vast nothingness of infinity. It's kind of comforting for me.”

Viktor nodded, “I don't…” his voice trembled, “I don't like that idea…”

“Well, you don't have to like it, it's just a guess.”

“I don't… I don't want to disappear, I don't want to…”

Jayce turned to look towards Viktor, tears rolled down his cheeks.

Other people's emotions were not something he was accustomed to dealing with. He always felt awkward when people started to cry in front of him.

But it was Viktor, not just any person.

Not sure what to do, Jayce hugged him.

That made Viktor start sobbing in full, he wanted to put some space between them so Viktor could calm down, but the other let go of his cane and held Jayce with all his strength.

“I'm being silly,” Viktor would whimper between sobs, “It just snuck up on me all of a sudden!” He sobbed, “But it's not what I meant to do! I simply—”

Jayce shook his head, he kept holding Viktor. “It's ok, you don't need to justify anything, we're partners. That's what I'm here for.”

Viktor nodded and kept sobbing as Jayce closed his arms around him and didn't let go.

Never let go.

----------------------------------------------

On the porch of the house, Jayce was waiting for her. The sun was beginning to set, she was just in time for dinner.

"How did it go?" Her brother asked with a smile.

Cait dismounted Nellie and held the reins in her hands, "didn't find anything useful."

"The case is going to be a tough one then?"

"It's not just that, nobody seemed to want to cooperate with me. They kept changing the topic or asking me unrelated questions."

Jayce shrugged, "old town, old customs," he walked to Nellie and took the reins from Cait's hands, "Let's go get you to the stables pretty girl."

They walked slowly. Somehow it felt like when they were younger and Caitlyn would follow Jayce like a lost duckling; quacking excitedly at every single word he said.

She always said that Jayce was like her big brother, but truth to be told, Jayce was more of a father than her actual father ever was.

"Then you didn't find anything at all?"

She sighed, "Well..."

"Yes?"

"Nevermind, it's... just a gut feeling."

"Those sometimes tell us important things, you know? The subconscious working on the background, figuring out something while the rest of the mind is busy with something else." He chuckled, “Viktor and I used to do random things when we were stuck at some point on our research, hoping that the problem was resolving itself deep within our minds.”

Cait tilted her head to the side, the sudden feeling of acting like a fool creeping up her spine. "It's... There's an old woman on the edge of town, she's weird, but something tells me she knows more than she lets on."

"Ah, Old Theodora. She probably does know something."

"You know her? She mentioned Viktor."

"Yes, she's the town's favorite topic during quiet days. People say she's a witch. She and Viktor have met, in the past, right after I bought the house. I invited Viktor to stay here for a week, and somehow he ended up wandering to her cabin."

"So they were friends?"

Jayce shrugged, they entered the stable and guided Nellie to her stall. "Viktor is a man of science, but he's also highly superstitious. After they met, he went on and on about how their meeting was destined somehow... I don't know if it was, but they did get along."

She hummed, "I'll talk to her again later."

----------------------------------------------

After dinner, Jayce accompanied Cait to her room, the floorboards creaking under the weight of both Viktor and himself. She said goodnight and entered her room.

Just like last time, there was some sort of tension in the surrounding air. Stagnate air even though the window and the curtains were wide open. She thought about the runes the old woman had engraved on the walls of her house, but then shook her head.

She wouldn't believe foolish things like that.

----------------------------------------------

"Caitlyn..."

Cait frowned, she turned towards the voice, "Violet?"

She found herself in the middle of an open field, in the middle of the day, bright blue open sky on top of her and not a single cloud in sight.

There was laughter, and unmistakably it was Vi's.

"Violet, where are you?"

She began walking around, the earth shifting slightly under her feet with every step she took. "Violet?"

The laughter came from the house in the distance. 

Another step, and the world suddenly changed around her. A dark hallway, barely illuminated by moonlight. At the end of it, there was a boy, standing still in the darkness. His face so buried in the void that to Cait, it looked more akin to a blurred spot. No trace of any feature.

She had the urge of asking him what his name was, but no matter how hard she tried, her mouth wouldn't open. 

The kid began walking towards her.

First, he raised his arm, pointing at something behind her. Whatever it was, she couldn't move her body to see it. Then he took a hesitant step.

It moved as if it wasn't bound by gravity; some sort of puppet held by strings that decided to put on a little boy's skin as a costume.

He wanted to talk, judging by the muffled screams coming out of where his mouth should be. Yet his face was nothing but a blurry patch of skin. No eyes, no nose, no mouth. It couldn't scream.

The walls surrounding them pulsed. Blood quickly made them move rhythmically. The floor beneath her began shifting. She was within a giant heart. 

With desperation, the kid kept pointing behind her, and finally, she gasped and turned around.

On the other end of the hallway, there was a black void where the wall was supposed to be. 

It blinked.

Cait fell backwards and her eye opened.

She looked around, the earth, the sky, the sun, everything was still there, it had been just a nightmare.

Caitlyn trembled and hugged herself for a second. Oddly enough, she felt a sense of calmness. Even with the dreams, her full energy had been restored.

Sighing, she pushed away her blanket to get up.

----------------------------------------------

When the door opened, she saw Jayce gently push Viktor forward.

"Good morning Sprout, slept well?"

Cait smiled and nodded, "Are you going outside?"

"Actually, we were going to get breakfast, it's still early."

"I'll go with you."

Jayce smiled, "Maybe later you can join us outside, I want to go clay pigeon shooting."

There was a bolt of emotion running through her, it had been a while since she held a gun with other intention than to kill fellow humans. "Sure, if it's ok with Viktor, I wouldn't want to interrupt your time together."

She looked at him, but Viktor was quiet, pale, and looking at the nothingness in front of him; the only sign of him being there was the way he played with the little lamb toy in his lap.

It was strange, Cait could've sworn that he was more lively yesterday. Whatever, she probably was just taking her time really observing him this time.

"I'm sure he doesn't mind at all." Jayce squeezed Viktor's shoulder gently.

----------------------------------------------

The breakfast was spent mostly with her and Jayce talking while Viktor observed them. It wasn't something she wasn't accustomed to already, even before the accident Viktor rarely if ever talked to her. Later, they walked outside, Jayce pushing Viktor's wheelchair, the crunching of the grass underneath them a satisfactory hum, letting him rest under the sunlight as the fresh air flowed around them.

Jayce went running inside after making sure Viktor was comfortable. He returned shortly after with a trap on his hands, a golden rifle, and a bunch of targets.

"Do you want to go first?"

The rifle felt heavy in her hands, she nodded.

"Alright, ready when you are." He walked to the trap, getting it ready.

She got in position, closed her one single eye, breathed, and thought of Vi.

"Pull!"

Jayce threw the first bird, Cait followed it with her eye for a fraction of a second. She hesitated, and…

She missed.

Cait huffed. "Pull!"

Another target went flying, she shot again, but missed still.

"Pull!" 

Another miss.

Cait screamed. A shoot like that shouldn't be that difficult. She had done a thousand times harder.

"Do you want some minutes to relax?" Jayce sounded concerned, and truly, for him to sound worried about her, something must've gone very wrong in her life.

"Yes..." Cait breathed deeply, trying to calm her emotions, "Your turn."

They exchanged places, Jayce prepared his rifle meticulously.

"Didn't know you had one." Cait commented, looking at the golden metal decorating it. "Didn't believe you were the type of men that would buy guns like that."

Jayce chuckled, "You'll be surprised..."

After the trap was prepared, she smiled, "Ready."

Jayce nodded, lifting his rifle, "Pull!"

Cait threw the clay pigeon, and almost immediately, Jayce shoot it. A thousand pieces fell to the ground.

"Woah, you were so bad at this when we were younger."

"I have more focus now."

Target after target, Jayce never missed one, while Cait couldn't even shoot one. At that point, she probably wouldn't have hit a target even if it was laying on the ground. She threw her rifle to the ground, done with it already.

Jayce picked it up, making sure that it was empty. "Is everything alright?"

Cait nodded, "Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure? You seem... scattered."

"You are one to talk about someone being scattered."

Jayce shook his head, "I'm just worried about you, that's all. Sorry if I overstepped."

Cait bit her lips and looked at him. "I had a nightmare yesterday..."

"About?"

"It was... about Vi."

"What about her?"

"We had a fight before I came here, it wasn't pretty."

"Have you thought about talking to her?"

"It isn't that easy Jayce, I have my reasons, and she couldn't understand that… I'm not even sure she wants to try to understand."

Jayce hummed, he turned to look at Viktor, who was some meters back.

"I think you and Vi are great for each other, you know?"

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"You two remind me a lot of Viktor and me."

Cait stayed silent.

He sighed, "We... We were good for each other, you know? Not just for academic work, but for everything. I would smash my head into a metaphorical wall again and again, so focused on progress; and Viktor would be the one to pull me to the side, showing me you could just walk around. And when he got lost on the little details; he always said it was me who gave him the strength to push forward."

Cait nodded.

"We were good... we really were good. And I took it for granted." Jayce looked down and covered his mouth with his hand, before letting it fall again, "I don't know why... It's just one of those things that you never get to see how truly beautiful they are because they're so common. The sun comes out, the stars shine in the dark, Jayce and Viktor stay together... Then when Mel and I started dating..." He shook his head. "I didn't see it, I didn't want to see it, I was blind to his suffering; his loneliness.  And while I was out, drinking and laughing, Viktor was dying... Scared and lonely."

Cait turned to look at Viktor, he was at enough distance that he couldn't possibly hear them.

"You know..." Jayce laughed, he began fidgeting with his rifle. "After the accident, I went to our lab, I searched through his things... And I found a letter for me." Jayce swallowed saliva, it was clear that he was trying his best not to cry. "It said... That he understood me, but our paths simply didn't align anymore, and that was fine; he still valued me dearly. He couldn't stay there anymore, in Piltover. He wished me luck with my pursuits and that he'll go back to Zaun to receive palliative care before dying." Jayce's voice broke on that last part, tears slowly rolled down his face.

"The last thing he wrote... It was that I should go visit him in Zaun from time to time... 'Go there when you have time, you don't have to worry if you are busy, but by the time you are reading this letter, I shall be already established in Zaun. So I hope you can go tomorrow. Go to this old ugly house tomorrow, my dear Jayce. Go tomorrow'." Jayce laughed, such a sad sound, "But tomorrow never came..."

Cait walked forward and grabbed Jayce's hand. There was a lot she wanted to say, but she let that gesture talk for her. "It's ok, he's here now. And he's ok."

Jayce chuckled more. He dropped the guns to the ground and cleaned his tears with his free hand. "It's not ok, Sprout. The person that Viktor used to be is gone. The man I used to be is also gone... Both, forever..." He breathed deeply to calm his sadness, "I lost him, lost myself... even now that I have him... The guilt of it all is just..." His shoulders fell down in quiet defeat. Then forced a smile on his face. "You should talk to Vi, while she's still there. Don't make the same mistakes I made, Sprout."

Cait bit the inside of her cheek and look everywhere but at Jayce. When she was with him, she sometimes felt like a little kid who needed her big brother to hold his hand at night before falling asleep, to scare away monsters and ghosts.

Then there was Vi, and Ambessa, even now, both very present as a memory. A part of her didn't feel strong enough.

"I'll think about it."

----------------------------------------------

The rest of the day was spent with Jayce and Viktor. Talking, mostly with Jayce, as Viktor was mostly unresponsive aside from some slow nods here and there. She inquired a few times about his health, but Jayce kept shocking his head, insisting that it was nothing, that sometimes Viktor got like that.

There was an odd feeling about Viktor, but every time she thought about it, a soft something pushed it away from her head.

The sun came down and Jayce accompanied her to her room alongside Viktor. Like always, she said goodnight to both. After they were gone, she began putting on her nightgown, turned off the light and got into the bed.

The heavy blanket felt like protection. She sighed, looking at infinity in front of her. There was again the weird sensation of somebody, or something, watching. The cold feeling of fear going down her spine. She tried to ignore it and closed her single eye to sleep.

A soft knock on the door. 

Cait sat up, "Jayce? Is that you?"

But nothing. 

"Jayce, I asked if that was you?"

Nothing but silence. 

"Jayce?"

Still nothing, she huffed and lied down once more.

Another knock.

"Jayce, if this is some kind of joke, it's not funny."

Another pause.

Cait sighed, finally deciding to sleep now—

A knock.

She jumped out of her bed and went running at the door, "Alright, what do you—"

But as soon as she opened it, in front of her there was a solid wall of bricks. 

Before she could understand what she was looking at. The handle jumped out of her hand, snatched away by some invisible force.

The door slammed shut.

She immediately went to open it again, and there it was, the hallway again, empty as ever.

Cait panted, suddenly feeling exhausted, what did she see? What was happening?

There was nothing but disbelief in her mind, Caitlyn shook her head, she must've been more tired than what she had thought? It was affecting her. Walking back to the bed, she lied down and closed her eye. Like that, sleep soon came to her, she let go of her consciousness and her body became heavy, her breath even.

She heard someone opening the door.

The sudden sound made her wake up, yet she couldn't move her body. 

There were soft footsteps. A pair of feet; then another set of soft footsteps, and another; softly moving towards her. On the floor, on the walls, the ceiling.

No matter how much she fought to move her body, she simply couldn't. It felt like she was tied down by something.

A dip on her bed, something gigantic began climbing on it. With her heart beating fast on her chest, she remembered what Viktor had said.

"Don't look."

Caitlyn tried to breathe, but her lungs were heavy; a gargantuan feeling on top of her chest that oppressed and squeezed everything. 

She resolutely did not open her eye.

The sound of the blanket moving, then whatever it was that thing began climbing higher and higher on top of her. 

Then… Nothing, just a faint wisp of air on her face. The window was firmly closed and there wasn't any draft in the room. 

A few moments later and whatever it was on top of her jumped away, its footsteps could be heard running away from the room before closing the door with a slam. The laughter of children filled the air. And still Caitlyn couldn't move.

She screamed with everything she had, but there was absolutely no sound coming out of her mouth.

----------------------------------------------

It was something that in retrospect, Jayce always should’ve known. It had been obvious if he had just stopped to think about it, even if for a moment.

The way Viktor had always hid his cough, or why he never saw him throw away the napkins he was using.

A few drops of blood here and there, Viktor would always look up and smile shyly, saying that he simply cut his finger when he wasn't looking. It wasn't something so rare that Jayce couldn't believe it. 

But Viktor's hands only had calluses on the tips of his fingers, never cuts.

Every time he looked at Viktor, he couldn't stop thinking about his father. Perhaps that was why his mother had taken such a liking to him, they were so similar, though, truth to be told; Jayce didn't remember anything about his father other than a vague feeling of comfort.

He remembered not feeling anything when the funeral happened, just a vague sadness when there was nobody the next morning, expecting to see his father by the kitchen, making breakfast like always, only to be confronted with an empty space. 

But Jayce never felt anything at all, never cried, never shed a tear. Perhaps his mother had been weirded out by his lack of emotions.

Still; Jayce was surprised when he found the old cufflinks his father used to wear. They were made out of iron by his mother herself; with the proud symbol of house Talis. That was the thing that was alive in his memory; how his father used to always get ready in the morning, never forgetting his cufflinks.

And oh, how his father used to smile when he looked at himself in the mirror; he gave such a bright smile. But that was of course before he died.

Jayce knew already that there was something strange about Viktor already, knew it all too well. Between coughs, drops of blood and an ancient book, desperately searching for an answer to a problem Jayce pretended not to see.

That’s why he grabbed his father’s cufflinks and brought them to the lab.

“Look what I found,” Jayce announced, the pieces of metal rolling in his fist.

“What is it?” Viktor quickly hid a bloody napkin while pretending to put away the piece he was working on. Jayce in turn pretended not to see it,

“Ah, it’s some old cufflinks I found while cleaning some old stuff in my apartment. My mother must’ve thrown them in a box when I was moving out, probably thought I would like to wear them.”

“And you don’t want to?” His partner pushed up his protective goggles up his head, revealing his golden eyes.

There was something trapped within Jayce’s chest. Wanting to escape.

“It’s not my style, really.” He extended his hand to Viktor, “here, you should have them.”

“Jayce, I—” Viktor looked at them closer, “It’s also not my style, too formal.”

“Then wear them on formal occasions. Probably at one of those galas you never accompany me to. Now I’ll have the excuse to drag you over.”

Viktor eyed the cufflinks, he clearly liked them, “I’m not even a Talis.” Still, he took them.

Jayce smiled and hid his fidgeting hands behind his back. “As the sole heir of house Talis, I tell you that it doesn’t matter, you spent so much time with me and my mom, you might as well be a Talis by now.”

Viktor nodded, he rolled down the sleeves of his shirt, and Jayce observed him as he carefully put them on. Then he looked at Jayce and smiled.

There was some dry blood on his lips.

“How does it look?”

Jayce smiled back. “Perfect.”

Later; when Jayce arrived in his department in the middle of the night, he would close the door carefully behind himself, stand in the middle of the living room and remember.

The last memory he would have of his father would be him getting ready in the morning before going to work; putting those same cufflinks carefully. His father then would notice Jayce observing him, and he would smile at him like always.

“How does it look?”

(There was still blood on his lips, blood on the napkins, blood on the desk, blood everywhere and Jayce wanted to submerge his head on water and scream.)

And thus; for the first time in all his life, Jayce’s knees hit the floor, and he cried thinking about his father.

----------------------------------------------

I am everywhere, everything, everyone and every time. I am.

With a gasp, she woke up, her chest hurt as if a boulder had rested on top of her all night.

Surprisingly, given what had happened the last night, she didn't feel fear nor any kind of worry. She was extremely happy actually, full of energy. Cait smiled and got up to change her clothes and began the new day.

Once she was ready, Cait walked out of her room, remembering the path to the dining room. 

There she watched Jayce feeding Viktor some fruit. Fresh peaches.

He put the small piece of fruit to Viktor's lips, who softly bit into it. The juice of the ripe peach slid down the corner of his mouth to his chin. Her brother quickly cleaned it with a napkin. 

Then he hesitated.

After no more than a few seconds, he let the napkin rest on Viktor's lap, and moved closer to him, to kiss the corner of the other's mouth. Tender yet desperate, as if he couldn't control himself.

Cait watched it from afar, and smiled. She had her suspicions that Viktor wasn't just an academic partner, but it was nice to confirm it since Jayce never said anything. She was like that too, they were siblings, in ways that mattered more than blood.

With force in her steps, she announced her entrance and marched to them.

Jayce immediately backed away from Viktor and looked at her like he had been caught committing a heinous act. "Cait, I can explain—"

"What's for breakfast?"

"Uh… what?"

"Yeah, what's for breakfast? What do you think I would care about right now?"

Jayce frowned, but she simply smiled and shrugged. His brother nodded, a feeling of thankfulness in the air, "I'll bring you some food, you wait here."

She stayed with Viktor, who simply looked at nothing in front of him. Must've been her imagination, but in her mind, he looked more pale than before, his skin clammy like he was seriously sick.

His eyes slid to her, he giggled like a little boy.

----------------------------------------------

Her day was spent alongside Jayce and Viktor outside; though she was supposed to go to the town again to look around for… what for? There was something that she was forgetting, something wrong in her mind.

In any case, she enjoyed the day; talking and laughing with her brother. It suddenly felt like all her problems were very far away.

It wasn't until she was back at her room when she remembered her plan to go into town to investigate more about the missing persons.

She sighed and covered her face with one hand, how could she have forgotten about that? Her mind was getting a bit scattered; but it was too late to go now, Cait would have to wait until tomorrow.

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Next morning, Cait once again woke up feeling good and refreshed. She stretched her back and hummed, there was a sweet taste in her mouth, as if she had swallowed honey.

There had been a dream about one thing or another, yet, she couldn't remember anything other than a vague feeling of something missing.

Getting up from bed, she dressed and brushed her hair slowly. 

Her reflection wasn't the same as before, but what had changed? She felt… prettier, younger… Cait shook her head and walked slowly to the dining room; it was all a bunch of nonsense. 

As she approached her destination, there were muffled voices. Jayce was talking.

"But I don't know how much of a good idea this is... No, of course not, but I don't like it that it is her you are doing this to... If I could—"

"Jayce? Who are you talking to?" She approached.

Her brother, who was sitting in front of Viktor, stopped, turned to her and smiled.

"Ah, Viktor, I need to tell him my every thought; even if right now he can't answer. It's an old habit."

For his part, Viktor wasn't moving at all, it barely seemed like he was breathing. So pale and thin, his skin rubbery and his eyes unseeing. The lamb toy on his lap untouched. It should've worried her, it had to worry her to see someone else in that state. Viktor was more akin to a corpse than a breathing living man.

That really should be worrying; a part of her mind alerted. It wasn't normal, but when she thought about it for a couple seconds more; all worries and thoughts related to that dissolved into pleasant nothingness.

It was warm and comfortable, she almost… felt as if… Disappearing…

"Did you want to go into town today?" Jayce asked softly.

Cait snapped back to reality, "Yes, I wanted to..." She frowned, "I wanted to do something, but I can't remember..."

Jayce nodded, "It's alright if Viktor and I go? I wanted to buy some supplies and I don't want to leave him alone here."

She nodded, "What do you need?"

Jayce turned back to Viktor, his face serious for a moment before turning back to Cait, "food."

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Her brother called for a horse-drawn carriage that arrived half an hour later. Cait stepped in and helped Jayce lift Viktor's wheelchair. They tucked it into a corner of the carriage before Jayce went back and delicately lifted Viktor himself into the carriage to sit him at his side. She looked at Jayce, all dressed in mourning black, while Viktor was wearing a colorful blue outfit with red lining. They were always very different, but now they looked like true opposites.

Most of the travel was spent with Jayce and her talking about one thing or another.

"You know," Jayce began, "Viktor always wanted a motor carriage."

"Oh, those new expensive ones? But those are too clunky and noisy. It's better to have a pair of reliable horses."

Jayce looked out the window, "Viktor always wants things to be predictable, having a horse adds an unpredictable variable. Or so he would say." He then grabbed Viktor's hand, "He likes the reliability of machines."

"But machines break; they can break at any time for anything, it doesn't seem like they are much better than animals."

Jayce shrugged, "That's what I think too, but..."

Cait followed his line of sight out the window, she saw that old cabin at the edges of the woods.

"Look, that's the old cabin with Viktor's friend."

Jayce sighed, "What cabin?"

"You know the ca—" But when Cait turned to there again, there was nothing. "I..."

"Look Sprout, we're almost at the town already."

She looked out the window one last time and when there was nothing there, she nodded.

"What are you going to do in the city?"

There was a slight pressure on the top of her head; that pleasant void that invaded her soul, "I... I think I should search for something, but I'm not sure what for, I used to know, but I can't remember..."

"Tell you what, why don't you come with us to buy supplies; we can show you around town, then I'll take you to the best place to eat here, deal?"

Cait smiled, "Deal."

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People in town were extremely friendly, though she knew it was not her first time visiting the town. But she couldn't remember the first time, no matter how much she searched in her memories.

However, right now people were so friendly with her, gifting her fruits to eat, and a lot of the young maidens smiled at her with coquettish charm. It reminded her a bit of Violet when a girl with pink hair approached her to give her some sweet apples for free, saying her beautiful smile was enough payment.

She missed Vi, but it didn't hurt like it did before, where before there had been a big crack on her heart that pulsed with pain every time she thought about her, now she just felt a vague nothing. The void in her chest didn't hurt, it just felt nice.

It must be her getting over Violet, perhaps.

Looking around, she found Viktor quietly sitting in the sunlight while little children put flowers in his hair. Cait smiled, her and Viktor never got along too well, but she was happy that he got this little moment after what had happened to him.

Moving on, she saw Jayce talking with the baker, a young woman. Pale skin, blue eyes and red hair, she was extremely beautiful.

Said woman also happened to look like one of Jayce's exes.

Cait began walking to them, but Jayce grabbed the woman's arm forcefully. He looked at her hand as if inspecting a piece of meat one wanted to buy from a butcher.

"Hey, is everything ok?" She tried to defuse the situation as she stepped at their side, but Jayce simply ignored her in favor of looking at the woman's body.

She didn't seem to mind, just smiled. Sure, Jayce was an attractive man, but not that attractive, though in reality Cait wasn't in the position to judge that.

Finally when Jayce was satisfied with what he saw, he let go, then turned to Cait and nodded his head like nothing had happened. "Of course, let's go eat."

The other woman nodded and walked inside the bakery again.

"What was that?" Cait asked as they went to meet Viktor again, “I thought you and Viktor—”

Jayce looked directly at her, at the eye patch that covered part of her face. "Forget about it."

The muscles in her neck tensed, a part of her fought to not let them move, but the feeling was inescapable. She nodded and everything in her mind vanished.

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On the way back, Cait looked out the window, to that empty space she swore there was a cabin once. It felt like there was something, something truly important she was forgetting, but even as she tried hard to think about it, she simply couldn't come up with something.

Thick like warmth honey that slid down her spine, she almost could feel pleasure in the tip of her tongue. It went down her throat and out his eyes. If she focused on it, she saw a bright light. It felt… warm, slow… Just… S l e e p . . .s l e e e e e e e e

"Cait?"

Jayce asked.

"Yeah?" Her mind somewhere else.

"I was just asking if you wanted to eat something specific tomorrow."

There was a thing that she really should be talking about. But the more she thought about it, the more she felt the void approach. It was all over her mind, and she ended up not wanting another thing but to just give in, to surrender to the sensation. Not even moving her tongue to swallow food or take a breath seemed worth it, she just wanted to let it take her wholeheartedly.

She looked at Viktor, the absent light in his eyes as he observed her, his mouth tightly shut to remind her of the way her mother's mouth had looked like in her casket. Sewn shut so it didn't seem like she was screaming.

Cait smiled anyway; her mind slipping into that pleasant feeling, forgetting everything.

"Anything you want is fine."

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She snapped. Her breath went in and out quickly, she looked at the closed door in front of her, candles softly illuminated the wood.

When did she get there? She was in front of her room, but there wasn't a single memory of her getting there; just a black, inky empty space in her mind. She had been asleep and just woke, or at least it felt like that.

What the hell was happening to her?

It was going to get her, if she thought too much about it. It was getting closer, and she didn't even know why or how. Anything else that happened was because of that, but if she started to plan around it; it caught her—

"Have you been sleeping well?" Jayce asked, one hand holding the candle, the other on Viktor's wheelchair.

She nodded, "I've been having the most perfectly splendid sleep lately." Though a part of her mind felt it by saying those words, it was wrong— no no, bad girl, we shouldn't think those kinds of things. "Nothing I can complain about."

Cait smiled.

Jayce hummed while looking at Viktor. "You might have weird dreams, it's normal, you know. The house is weird; but it shouldn't be nightmares..." He breathed deeply and finally turned to look at her, "it might be better if you forget them."

She nodded, "of course. I'll forget them."

Jayce looked defeated, "I'm so sorry..."

"About what?"

"You shouldn't have come here."

"But I'm happy Jayce." She smiled more.

Jayce bit his lips, he began walking away, pushing Viktor's wheelchair slowly through the house.

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Under the blankets, without much thought, she closed her eyes and breathed deeply. Cait fell into Morpheus' arms.

After a while, she opened her eyes again, she was floating… Or falling. If she looked down, Cait could see herself in bed, completely covered in roots. 

The roots hugged her tightly, some of them went to the place where her blind eye was, others went to her mouth. It entered her and a soft glow covered her body.

She was surrounded by puppets like kids. Ten of them, all faceless and being controlled by the same roots that held her. 

A black figure stood by the bed, a complete void, except for two golden shining eyes that looked down at her body on the bed.

I liked you in the same way people like a dog that has killed a rabbit.

It echoed around the room, the soft voice with a noticeable accent.

Your family… if a place like hell existed, I'm sure it wouldn't have been enough for what it has been done to others. I was just a tool for that, a tool believing itself important.

“What?” But her voice didn't reach her ears.

You treated Jayce as if he was nothing but a mere hound. You've never cared about him, or anything beyond yourself. Like mother, like daughter.

“I didn't? You don't know me. I always cared about Jayce. I'm not my mother.”

After you lost your eye, you remained as blind as before. As awful, uncaring and unknowing to the pain you've caused. What knowledge did you gain, Odin? Your little game of vigilante is nothing but a mere facade to hide the guilt. And Violet knew, didn't she?

“You don't know me.”

But you are so pleasant now. A little well-behaved dog, obedient.

“And who the fuck do you think you are? You are nothing, just a trench rat with delirious of grandeur.”

The darkness turned his eyes to her.

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(I was never sane to begin with.)

There were very few reasons to live for Jayce.

He had his research, and the wish to help people, and… In retrospect, that was really everything he had, more or less.

If he thought too much about it, he would find it pathetic; but the fewer the reason to live one had, the easier it was to find a good reason to die. In the end, the reason he hadn’t killed himself truly wasn’t the fact that Viktor helped him get back his research, it was Viktor himself. 

Or was it?

(I have the right to be cruel, I've earned it.)

Years later, Jayce felt happy, he felt happier than he ever felt before; but if he thought about reasons to live or die, he simply couldn’t be sure of why exactly he kept on living.

He guessed it was the fact that he had made it. Finally accepted by people who used to hate him, surrounded by those who didn’t act like he was weird or unsettling. The attention he craved—

(I can’t keep up with this; not like this, I need to fix the body first. I don’t know if being in the wrong position will make him—)

No it wasn’t attention, he wasn’t doing everything just to get attention, he wanted to help, he knew he wanted to help. Or at least that was a part of it.

(Ten of them, and it has to be young ones, otherwise you risk—)

Ah, suddenly it all got mixed up, perhaps it had been mixed up since the beginning.

Jayce thought about Viktor, he thought about the first time he saw him, the second, the third, and every other time since. He thought about all those nights working in the lab with him until the sun was up again. However, Viktor wasn’t what he wanted, not really, what Jayce wanted was—

(Keep ignoring the blood, just ignore the blood.)

He… wasn’t sure about it. Everything was a mess, but if he focused on working, everything should’ve been fine. It was going to be fine, wasn't it?

(When is enough really enough? How farther do I have to go yet? Isn't human life—)

Viktor.

The sound of his laughter, his presence, his warmth. The way his shoulder felt underneath his hand. He was cold, so cold, why was he—

You always had a special way to make me seem both like a virginal victim and a bitch at the same time. One of your many talents, Jayce.

(Viktor asked for more candles for the next seance this morning, I'm not sure about the productivity of all that, but he seems more and more concerned about matters of—)

But! 

He forgot what he was thinking…

You are getting your times mixed again dear. Shouldn't mess with the timeline like that.

(An old book with ancient instructions, first, you need—)

Though if asked about it, in all honestly, younger him thought it would be what he had now. The galas, the people adoring him, his arm around Mel’s waist, both of them smiling so perfectly, all so fake, but it was the only reality he knew. 

Yet as of right now he found everything was so utterly—

(A way to bring back the dead? Viktor, you can’t believe in that, that sounds so—)

—Ridiculous.

Jayce was getting ready that evening, putting on some cufflinks Mel had gifted him, they were made with pure gold. The Medarda symbol interlaced with the Talis’ one. Looking in a mirror they had in the lab, he fixed his white coat one last time. Jayce was Piltover’s standard of masculine perfection. 

Every man wanted to be him.

(The pathetic lot.)

With the corner of his eyes, he could observe his partner diligently working on their prototype for what Viktor liked to call a death ray, just a silly project they had on the side.

(I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, if I could go back in time, I just…)

“So, you are not going?” There was some venom in Jayce's words; a wound that had gone untreated for so long, and it began to get filled with pus and dead blood. “You should go, a way to finally use the cufflinks I gave youuuuu**#%&$*×

(I’m sorry mister Talis, but the body was crushed, there wasn’t anything we could do to help. He was **** before we arrived—)

“There’s so much work still left to do, at least one of us has to stay behind while the other goes to parade around like a peacock.”

Jayce sighed, “It’s an important gala! You know it is, Mel said—”

Viktor chuckled, “Of course it’s always something Miss Medarda said, it’s her opinion the one that matters, isn’t it?”

“That is not fair, she has been nothing but helpful and kind to us.”

(Jayce Talis had very few reasons to live, in fact, so few that it could be encapsulated into one single word and Jayce Talis was so blind, he didn't know what word it was.)

Viktor muttered something under his breath.

Jayce frowned, he was getting truly angry with Viktor, “What did you say?”

“                             “ 

Everything has to die… eventually.

“Listen Viktor, I don’t care what prejudices you as a Zaunite have against Piltover’s traditions, but this is a serious thing! There are going to be investors there that will look at our work. And if you want to leave all of that to me then at least have the decency of not acting like you are morally superior for not helping!”

That was… Too much. I truly hated you when you acted like that, sometimes I still hate you.

(It was beautiful, oh, so beautiful.)

Toomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuchtoomuch

Jayce never understood how his mother could love a man so much. Until he did, but he understood too late. 

He grabbed the handle of the door and walked out. Viktor might've been in a sour mood that night, but that wasn’t an excuse to leave Mel waiting for him.

(Come home, please, I just wanted to tell you that IS H U T  U P

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Ah, I'm messing with the timeline as well, aren't I? I'm sorry, I can't control it very well, yet.

Chapter Text

When Caitlyn woke up the next day, she wasn't surprised at all to feel a zap of energy course through her. A smile plastered on her face whether she liked it or not. Jumping out the bed, her feet hit the ground with a satisfactory thump, she quickly dressed and felt it inside her head every time she wanted to think.

Cait marched with confidence to the dining room, where very predictably she found Jayce and Viktor, Jayce helping Viktor to eat breakfast. 

She smiled until her cheeks hurt.

"Jayce," he turned to look at her. "Can we have a picnic later?"

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It was against every single fiber of her being; the tickles that trickled down to her toes and made her back arch with pleasure. She moaned quietly and got up to get ready.

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If 

I

Think about it, it truly feels more akin to picking up mushrooms than anything else. Even if I wanted to feel guilty about it, it would be a lie. Perhaps I'm starting to forget what it's like to be Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

H

h

h

h

h

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They sat on a blanket in front of the house. Jayce had made them some snacks so they could eat something while outside. Viktor was at their side, at this point he looked more like a lifeless doll than anything human, the little lamb toy on his lap forgotten.

The void inside her head became louder, she sighed and looked at Jayce.

"Viktor doesn't like me a lot, does he?"

Jayce frowned, "What makes you say that?"

"Just a feeling."

"You know how Zaunites are, he didn't like your family a lot, but it isn't personal, he understands that you are different. And if he offended you, I'm sure it wasn't intentional."

"I'm not so sure about that. I think it's personal for him."

Jayce chuckled. "He is very kind, I'm sure he wouldn't treat you badly anyway."

There was an inkling in her subconscious of something. "What is your relationship with Viktor exactly?"

"Why that question of all of a sudden?" He chuckled with surprise.

"I'm just curious."

He hummed, "He's... Someone very important to me, we are very close."

"I can see that, but what are the specifics?"

At that, Jayce blushed, "I mean..." He cleared his throat, "He's... we are..."

Cait chuckled too, noting how the void in her head receded while thinking about Jayce and Viktor. "I get it, I really do Jayce, I'm the same. Violet after all... She's more than a friend to me, you know?"

Jayce looked visibly relieved, "have you thought about her recently?"

Her mind soured, "I haven't... But this place is..." the void on her mind returned, this time stronger, so painful that it felt good. 

"Cait? Is something wrong?"

She invoked her fondest memory of childhood, that time she had tried to bake a cake for Jayce, she had made a mess, and then Jayce tried to help her; just to create a bigger mess. They both ended up laughing together all night, and even when Cassandra was mad at them, Caitlyn wouldn't have changed it for anything.

The void on her head receded again.

"Nothing, don't worry about it." She smiled.

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What is it that troubles you?

Work? Money? School? Family? Lovers? Friends? Isn't it all so overwhelming?

Do you ever feel like the world around you is burning down? Injustice is rampant, the person in charge is incompetent.

Is it hard to wake up in the morning? Aren't you tired of searching for a meaning that isn't there? Don't you want to look at yourself in the mirror and feel proud? Feel like you are someone.

Do you want to feel safe, always?

I can help  y o u 

I

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Later, as Jayce was putting all the things they bought in their place, Cait walked to him, "What are you going to do now?" 

Jayce hummed, "I'll probably read something to Viktor, what about you?"

"Oh, I was thinking about going to buy something in town."

"I don't know about that Cait, today we have an important dinner, wouldn't want you to miss it."

"I just want to go get ingredients to make something special."

Jayce frowned and looked at her, "Something special?"

"Like when we were kids! Do you remember the disaster of the cake?"

Jayce laughed while still putting things away, "I remember your mother screaming at me for an hour, not my fondest memory if I'm being honest."

"Aw, but you enjoyed spending time with me, didn't you?"

"Of course I did Sprout, being with you was the only enjoyable thing to do in that house."

Caitlyn stopped, she considered that for a moment, had Jayce truly suffered that much from being in there with her? Then there was the void on her mind again. However this time instead of making her feel good, it made her hurt. 

It hurt a lot!

"I'm sorry," she said with barely contained tears, "I never realized how bad it was for you..."

Jayce shook his head, "Your mother was never easy to please, but it wasn't so awful either, at least most of the time."

Cait began trembling, tears swelling on her eye, "I was so selfish and inconsiderate, I'm sorry..." her mouth moved on its own.

Jayce turned to her with a wild look on his face, then dropped everything he had on his hand and slammed his fist on the wall of the house. "Stop that!"

Cait felt her emotions go to the extreme opposite. Before she was overwhelmed, now she only felt numb. "I..." she cleaned her tears with the back of her hand, "I don't know what was that..."

Jayce sighed, he began massaging the side of his temple, clearly tired. He looked old. "You are right, you should go to the town..."

"I... What? What town?"

"You should go to the town, alone." He said with a firm voice, turning towards a wall.

As if magic, the confusion she felt disappeared, then she smiled. "Of course."

"I'll go prepare Nellie for you." Jayce walked past her.

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She kept thinking about pleasant memories of her childhood; the roots that entangled themselves between her thoughts weren't there, or at least not as strong as before, but she still had to be careful.

An idea danced in her subconscious.

When she arrived in town, Cait once again left the horse on one of the stables near the inn. This time when she dismounted, she didn't pat the horse on its head, she just looked at it.

The horse looked back with empty eyes.

Cait nodded and walked away, interacting with the people of the town. They mechanically seemed to come to life every time she was near them. It reminded her of a music box. The doll that danced when you pulled the string tight. If she opened a music box now would she find Viktor's body dancing slowly in circles?

After a while of buying things and talking to people, Cait turned towards the forest. It looked empty. She thought of the first time she went to hunt accompanied by Jayce.

Just a little lonely girl, no real friends besides a man much older than her; but she was different, and the man seemed like the only person in the world similar to her. The only one that could understand. She laughed, her talk about teenage topics probably bored him out of his mind, but Jayce still listened like she was the most important person in the world, not just a privileged teenager.

In her mind, the image of Jayce's back was still very clear, walking in front of her and holding the rifle wrong. He had insisted on going first, despite being completely awful at hunting and scaring away the prey with his big dumb footsteps.

With that vivid image on her head, she started walking towards the forest. Their first hunt, the laughter, the light, the crunching of the dry leaves underneath their feet, the cold, the smell of the forest.

Cait had been so young, both had been so young, and despite everything, they had found a bubble of happiness, together.

There was a clearing between the trees, the path back on the side.

A cabin stood there.

Theodora's cabin.

She cursed herself internally for thinking that. It made it come back.

Cait tried to run, but her body began to become numb and shook with every step, it felt like roots coming out of the ground, anchoring her to the place she was standing in.

The void returned, denying her any forbidden thoughts. What was she doing? Where was she going? It seemed like a… Dream— But she kept walking forward, just another step.

The pleasure began shortly after, warmth, soft. If she just could… 

Stop.

Crows began circling atop her.

Cait fell to the ground, she breathed deeply. Candy stuffed her mouth and with a sigh, her body relaxed. It felt like hugging Violet.

Violet…

Everything… slowly… Vanished as she closed… h e r  e y e e e e e e —

Something grabbed her shoulder.

With a gasp. Her eye snapped open and an immense pain pierced her head. She screamed and trashed around, but whatever was dragging her forward, it didn't stop.

A door opening and closing, then before she knew it, she felt something on top of her.

The pain increased tenfold, convulsing, she puked on the floor. It felt like she was being ripped apart from the inside out, the only thing she could do was to keep puking.

Sensations went in crescendo, the spasms of her body were so strong and fast she was sure it broke something.

Then it exploded out of her blind eye. 

Her eye patch broke and something large fell to the floor with a wet thud. Cait gasped for air, once, twice, and lost consciousness.

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She woke up exhausted and feeling like a marching band had stepped over her whole body. Her hand immediately touched her face, and found it sticky. Looking at it, it was covered in a mud-like liquid. She shivered.

"Took you long enough." An old woman called her attention.

"Theodora?"

The woman nodded.

With a cough, Cait sat, she was on a small bed that she guessed was Theodora's. Her gaze drifted to the floor, where a big puddle of the same liquid on her face called her attention. It was full of dead roots, and one wood eyeball.

She never wore prosthetics.

"That was inside me..." Her voice was hoarse.

The old woman shrugged, "It could've been worse."

That was a way to put it mildly. Cait looked at the other woman with resentment, then her subconscious threw at her an idea. "He's controlling everyone! Viktor is mind controlling the entire town!"

Theodora laughed. "No little girl. He's controlling everything."

"What?"

The old woman nodded, "He's everything, and everywhere, except here. But that won't last for long now."

"What do you know about Viktor? What happened to him?"

She sighed, "Love, that's what happened."

“This is serious.”

Theodora shook her head, "There was an old cursed book, it had a ritual in it, said that it could revive the dead... I knew the young man had an interest in the arcane; but I didn't know he had that book, had I known..." She sighed. "His lover must've found the book, he read it but only saw what he wanted to see, not understanding what he was doing..." 

Cait swallowed saliva, her throat feeling dry as an antique parchment. "Viktor died, and Jayce..."

"I'm afraid so."

Her body hurt, and she felt so weak, but still Cait pushed herself to get up from the bed with quivering legs, "And the thing living with Jayce, it's not Viktor anymore."

The old woman hummed, "I don't know... Maybe not in the way he used to be, but then again, you aren't the same person you were ten years ago, are you?"

"So he's what now? A monster? The devil? A God?"

"Perhaps a God, but not in the way you understand a God to be."

"Then how?"

"The arcane is old, little girl, older than this universe, and it chose your friend, uncaring of what we consider consciousness, or humanity. In that way, if you could understand... Then perhaps you could see what he is now. A man mixed with infinity."

She breathed deeply, thoughts rushed through her head, if Viktor was controlling everything around, then the disappearances? The 10 kids?

Nausea and horror hit her.

Cait shook her head, there was a thing around her neck connected to a piece of wood. "You put something on me."

"A rune, for truth and protection, it's how I freed you from him."

"So that is how I can stop him? With these runes?"

The old woman chuckled, "No stupid girl. That's like saying that a pin can stop an elephant."

"If he's as powerful as you claim he is, then how did you free me!?" Desperation leaked into her voice.

"Do you think an elephant pays attention to an ant? You were a mere afterthought for him, he probably uses more energy to blink than to trap you. Though, I'm afraid we made him angry, and on his feeding night!" Theodora laughed maniacally. "We'll die!"

Cait recoiled at those words, "there must be a way to stop him."

"Yes, convince him to stop."

It felt like she hadn't slept in a week, but it didn't matter, she would find a way to stop him. "You said something about him feeding, what is that about?"

Theodora laughed more, "what do you think happened to all those people?"

Her mouth fell open, “No… Jayce wouldn't have— Jayce couldn't have—”

Theodora merely shook her head with amusement.

Cait definitely needed to do something. "This rune, you said it couldn't help me, but do I have another option?"

"Beg for mercy.”

She looked at the piece of wood in her hand, "Do I need to carry it with me?"

"No, just carve it into whatever it is you want to protect and wish it with all your soul."

Cait nodded and looked at the other's eyes, "Do you have a knife?"

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When Cait stepped out of the cabin, the first thing she noticed was how cold it was. It seemed like everything around her had been encased in ice. The second thing she noticed was the sun quickly going down, perhaps unnaturally so.

Finally, the third thing she noticed was a bunch of animals surrounding said cabin.

Deers, bears, foxes and wolves, all with white dead eyes looking at Caitlyn expectantly. But the one that jumped out from the rest, was an emaciated stag with the rotting head of another stag tangled in his horns.

The rotten head opened its mouth and a soft voice began inside Cait's head.

Miss Kiramman, you have truly worried my partner, care to explain why?

There was horror rapidly growing in her guts, scorching and gelid at the same time, she tried to ignore it. "That's overly dramatic, don't you think, Viktor?"

The stag didn't react, it only moved to the side to reveal the mare Nellie, she had dead white eyes too.

Time to go back.

The decapitated head said.

Cait breathed deeply, she walked towards the mare and mounted it. It began trotting back to House Talis as soon as she sat still.

The world seemed to stretch and then squeeze in front of her; in a matter of seconds she was back in front of House Talis.

After dismounting, the horse stiffly walked back to its stalls alone.

A deep breath, she steeled her nerves and opened the door.

What she found inside was; nothing. Absolutely nothing except black emptiness and Viktor, sitting on his wheelchair with the lamb toy in his lap.

"Viktor, are you in there? Or there's something else?"

At that moment, the porcelain doll of Viktor turned his lifeless eyes towards her, he opened his mouth, and it moved, the rest of the facial muscles stayed still.

"You've worried Jayce a lot recently, Caitlyn. I'm not sure that keeping you here was such a good idea after all."

"You are the one responsible behind the disappearances."

“Is that a question?”

“No.”

He chuckles.

"I know what you did in that Cabin, Cait. Actually, we're not as different as I thought."

"Does Jayce know!? What exactly happened to those kids!?"

"Under your blouse, there are runes carved in your skin. It hurts longer than a normal cut, I know… It's not going to protect you, nor anyone else."

She covered her chest with her hand, the fabric was sticky with her blood. "What did you do!?"

"I'll admit I underestimated you, I didn't think you would put the pieces together; much less find a way to temporarily overcome me. I merely thought you would stay a few days, fuck a pretty woman, and go back to being miserable and alone."

Cait felt anger rushing through her veins, yet she tried to remain calm. "What did you do to those kids."

Viktor stayed silent for a moment, his eyes looking around at nothing. "Do you really want to know?"

"That's a stupid question."

For the first time in days, Viktor's face moved, he smiled. "Jayce brought them to me, and I ate their soul."

"You ate—"

At that moment the roof of the house fell around Cait, she put her arms on top of her head.

When the dust settled, in front of her, Viktor tilted his head to the side and his smile grew bigger. 

Would you like to see how I did it?

A metallic sound surrounded her, her vision clear for a moment, and there it was in front of her. Purple, bright ropes descending from the infinite darkness atop of them, slowly moving Viktor.

She noted the imitation of a fingernail at the end of one rope. 

Her heart stopped beating for a second, Caitlyn didn't dare look up, towards the rest of what Viktor had become.

“A God, but perhaps not in the way you understand a God to be.”

With a gasp, her breath got quicker and quicker, before she could do something else, roots shot out of the ground beneath her and wrapped around her.

I am everywhere, everything, everyone and every time. I am.

Everything went to black.

----------------------------------------------

(I love you. Perhaps I didn't show it the way I should've; maybe I just realized after it was too late. There were so many things in my life that seemed more important to me at the time. Things that in retrospect weren't what I wanted. 

I was too much of a coward.

I should apologize, but what good would that do now? Everything that I could say would be nothing but excuses. I don't see a clear path out of here, and the consequences only keep pilling one on top of another.

The stupid man only sees a thing after it already has happened

Now what do I have left? Just promises that I don't know if I can keep.)

Jayce sighed as he looked into the mirror. 

A pathetic excuse for an existence of some sorts is what he saw. Not man, or even human, not anymore, just the vague compounding of feelings, regrets, guilt, but more than anything else, cursed love.

Yet, it was harder to stop once he started, wasn't it? The first time he took that little boy's hand, promising him that he knew his father and that he would give him a gift. It hadn't been hard at all. Just means to get what he really wanted. It wasn't hard to start, but it seemed impossible to stop.

Only tonight, just one more cursed night, and tomorrow it would be better. Everything would be better, Cait just arrived at a bad moment, but tomorrow he would explain and everything would be better, for all three of them.

He walked with heavy steps through the house, the walls pulsing and hungry. It never would be like the house he remembered designing once upon a time, not as long as Viktor was there.

Finally, he arrived at the front door and opened it, he found the beautiful redhead woman of the market looking at him with empty eyes. She was dressed in a beautiful, anachronistic white dress that seemed older than the town itself. It didn’t escape Jayce that she looked oddly similar to one of her exes that Viktor hated. His love always had a penchant for drama after all.

Jayce sighed and took the woman's hand, dinner was ready.

----------------------------------------------

Cait gasped. Tied down to the bed, she whined from pain. Everything in her body hurt, her lungs, stomach, head, eye, even the tips of her fingers were full of pain.

Huffing, she looked around to find her room. The blue cold seeping into everything, now with reinforced vigor. Cait didn't know why, but something deep inside her understood that it was Viktor's doing. God or not, he was still an asshole underneath that mask of kindness that everyone seemed to believe so eagerly.

The blankets around her wrists and ankles tugged at her extremities painfully. Her body was being pulled apart slowly.

Viktor heard that thought.

"I'm sorry!" She screamed, and just before a bone popped out of its joint, he stopped.

Cait breathed deeply and looked around, thankfully she was still fully dressed with everything where it should be. There had to be a way to get out, it wasn’t hopeless yet!

What did an elephant care about an ant?

Yes; an elephant did not care about the ant, but that only gave the ant more freedom to move underneath the elephant's gaze.

Shocking her head to get rid of any more present thoughts, Cait breathed to get his mind empty. Once her breath even out, and there was just a trembling line of fear in her mind, the blankets around her relaxed.

She slipped her hand free and keeping her mind blank, she moved it to her belt. Slowly but surely she felt the tip from the knife Theodora had given her.

Just breath, calm down

In less of a second, Cait took out the knife and buried it in the bed beneath her. The lines of the rune of protection quickly engraved in the fabric. The bed shook as if alive, then stilled. The blankets fell pliant around her, and Cait jumped out of it, just in time to see the bed coming alive again.

Wooden teeth formed at the headboard and feet of the bed. It closed on itself violently like a mouth.

Cait ran to the door. The whole room convulsed in a frenzy; wood cracking, paint chipping, furniture rushing towards her. She just barely made it out before the house crushed its insides.

What do you think you are doing?

On the floor, she wanted to scream; but instead she focused all her energy in not fainting. She felt so weak, as if she had lost a big amount of blood, it was Viktor’s doing.

Do you think you can escape me? Don’t make me laugh.

With the knife in her hand and great effort, her legs stabilized beneath her and she stood up. She ran; without any idea where to go or why, she just needed to run.

I am everywhere, everything, everyone and every time. I am.

The floor vanished beneath her. 

It was a small fall, yet still hurt like hell. She found herself on the dining room's floor. In front of her, the Viktor doll sitting on the wheelchair, and Jayce holding a knife, about to kill a naked woman displayed on the table.

"Cait?" Jayce Stopped.

She felt an unfathomable amount of fury at that scene. How dare Jayce do something like that? How dare her own brother betray her like that!?

With a growl, she ran to Jayce and tackled him to the ground, he muttered something or other, but she couldn’t care less; getting up she grabbed the woman's wrist and with the knife carved into her arm the rune of protection.

The woman screamed, black liquid pooling in her mouth and eyes; but they didn't have time for that. Cait dragged her away, she looked around trying to find an exit, however, all the hallways looked the same.

An inhuman screech shook her, the house convulsed once again. This time, the walls opened, revealing eyes that screamed at her. The floor cracked beneath her feet and looking up, the ceiling disappeared.

I am quite done with your hysterics, Miss Kiramman. This ends now.

The woman at her side screamed more, Cait was running out of options.

Then she felt it. 

Her feet left the ground and her dress pooled around her like storm clouds; her hair suddenly moving upwards full of static trying to warn her of an incoming presence. 

For a moment Cait thought she was floating, but no, she was falling.

The entire house was falling.

With a silent gasp, her gaze moved upwards. Her whole body cold and stiff, as if she was already dead; she probably was.

Something; or more accurately, someone, slammed into her back; gravity went back to normal and both hit the ground with a dull thud. She recognized him because he had done that several times while wrestling with her.

"Jayce!" 

He hugged her with all his strength. "Whatever you do, don't look." Jayce whispered and covered her head with his arms.

That got Cait to stop, "What?"

"You won't be able to resist it, his true form, you'll lose your sanity."

It fell from the heavens, like a divine punishment. It hit the ground, and every surface around them. It was heavy, betraying the size of it as gigantic.

An inhuman scream strung enough to decimate the vocal cords of a human. A rapid movement of feet, and hooves. A crack followed by a gurgling noise. Just like that, the screaming stopped. Meat ripping and bones breaking were the only things Cait could hear, to mind came the sound of a dog chewing on bones. 

She didn't dare to look.

It ran away, the building around them groaned, and before she knew it, the only sounds around them were the soft singing of crickets at night.

Jayce sat back, Cait too.

In the dark hallway, the only proof that she found of the woman ever existing was a big stain of blood on the carpet, and a few red hair strands.

Brother and sister looked at each other in silence.

----------------------------------------------

You said that you loved me, but you said it too late.

I know you burn bright with guilt about what happened, about the past you can't change and the future that never was; but that fantasy is not something I want, my dear.

The thing is; all those perfect nights at the lab, all the laughter and light you remember; those weren't real.

Not like you remember them.

There was pain coating the underbelly of every situation.

I suffered in silence. I saw how you walk away, powerless to stop you. You left me behind, and it became increasingly clear that even when you were the world to me. I wasn't part of your perfect world.

I was unhappy. But you were happy, with her. So I gathered every feeling inside me and smiled. It was enough that you were content; after all, trench rats like me didn't have the right to feel sad over heartbreak.

It was enough to see you happy. Until it wasn't.

I don't blame you for what you did to me, however, it would be a lie to say that I didn't resent you. Yet, as of now. I finally have a say over my own life, what I want matters, and it is all thanks to you my dear. 

I know that you wish to go back to how things were, that you would give everything in the world to change me back to who I was. But I wasn't happy before.

I am happy now, even if you aren't.

My dear Jayce.

I gave everything for you before, why can't you give me this and be happy with me?

----------------------------------------------

"What happened?"

Jayce sat on the couch in the reading room. He looked exhausted and so old, a thousand years old soul trapped in a younger body. "What do you mean?"

"Jayce," Cait trembled, she couldn't stop shaking. "What happened?"

"To Viktor?" He rubbed his eyes.

"To everything and everyone."

Jayce sighed, "I don't think I even understand it myself, honestly."

"Well, then explain what you understand!" Cait put her hands behind her back to hide how much she was trembling.

Jayce shook his head. "Viktor died during the council attack, he wasn't badly injured like I said. He died completely... A pillar fell on top of him and..." Jayce covered his face with his hands, he breathed deeply, and his hands fell back to his lap. "Have you ever seen a crushed corpse?"

Cait hesitated, "No..."

"I hope you never have to... I just... It took five men to get him from under the pillar, and then it was too late already. He died slowly and full of pain, a part of me died there too..." Jayce took a shaky breath. "I took the corpse, not like anybody would stop me. For everyone else, it was just the corpse of a Zaunite, a non-existence with no family. Nobody stopped me. And I didn't know what I wanted to do with it at first, but then I found it."

"A book?"

Jayce nodded. "Viktor and I have always been enthusiasts of the occult, divinity, magic, or the arcane; call it whatever you want. He had this very old book, and there was an old ritual... I don't think it did what it said it would. But it worked, somehow. I don't know what happened; but Viktor's soul came back, though it's not just Viktor now, it's Viktor and something else, something old, older than this reality..."

"A God?"

Jayce chuckled, "There's no God Cait, there's no devil nor heaven nor hell. There's only the arcane, and that's what Viktor is. That's what we all are in one way or another."

Cait shaking increased, she sat down at Jayce's side. He grabbed her hand. 

"What happened to the children?"

Jayce closed his eyes, "The ritual... When you die, your soul, your energy, stays in your body for a bit. With time, as your body decomposes, it goes back to the universe... I needed souls, young souls, it said explicitly. Not how young, but I didn't want to risk the ritual not working, so..."

Cait let that realization fall on her. She expected to feel disgust, to feel anger, but as it was, the only thing she felt was fear.

"The disappearances?"

"Viktor's body, his human one, I mean. It can't be sustained by normal food, not anymore... He needs to eat souls, otherwise the connection between it and his actual soul weakens."

"Why has he been eating more often now?"

Jayce stayed silent for a moment, he swallowed saliva. "He needs it, he's... pregnant."

Cait frowned, "what?"

"I... He is a woman... At least his body is a woman's, but he never felt like a woman, so he always lived as a man... but his body is still... Fertile?"

Cait jumped away from Jayce' side. "How?"

"I don't know what you want me to say—"

"Who is the father?"

Jayce clenched his jaw, then sighed. "Viktor is having my child, Cait."

Cait recoiled away with disgust. She tried to run away, but Jayce caught up to her and grabbed her wrist. "Where are you going?"

"I don't want to be here in this cursed house for one second more!"

"Sprout, calm down. It's late already, stay until the sunrise. Then you can go."

"I don't want to be here! I can't stand to be here!" She punched Jayce.

He let her go, and laughed while covering his mouth, the place that had received the worst of the punch, "You don't understand, you think it's just the house that he controls? It's everything! The town, the forest, it could be more, if I wasn't here telling him not to. Even if you go out now, you won't escape him. Nobody will."

"Fuck off!" Cait stormed out of the room and went into a long hallway. She ran until she finally found the exit. When she opened the door, instead of the night's sky, she just found the same hallway.

Cait kept running through it, then she found Jayce's back, he was standing in the middle of it.

"You won't go if he doesn't let you. And he won't, I told him not to."

Cait breathed, she was so mad, the only thing that prevented her from killing Jayce was some semblance of love for someone who once was her brother. "What do you want?"

Jayce then deflated, "Just stay the night, rest a little, then you can go in the morning."

"Will he puppet me around again?"

"He won't, I promise."

"Does he control you?"

Jayce laughed, "it would be easier if he did."

"You are insane, you know that?"

"I was never sane to begin with."

----------------------------------------------

“Is this what you wanted, cupcake? Dead Zaunites everywhere and their blood on our hands!? But that doesn't matter to you, right? We are all just rats for you.”

She couldn't sleep at all. Memories of last night haunted her mind, every single sound, and every single movement, it made her want to run away. 

Memories of her.

Caitlyn was trapped in that labyrinth of a house, and there was no way out without the only person who knew the way out. The one who controlled the Minotaur.

Come morning  she stepped out of her room; extremely exhausted, and looked around. She needed to find Jayce to be free from that hell, and so it began her journey.

The day was beautiful outside, sun shining and the birds singing, she wondered how much of it was Viktor's doing? Probably all of it.

With careful steps, she marched down the hallway, careful movement followed by careful movement, though nothing would make her forget the sensation of the floor beneath vanishing.

Somehow, she found her way to an unopened door, it wasn't what she was searching for, yet when she tried to turn around, she saw nothing but a wall of bricks in front of her.

She sighed and went to open the door. 

Immediately, she was hit by the delicious smell of freshly made pancakes and a sense of infinite calm. A soft voice sang in a delicate timbre

"Singing O Willow Waly, by the tree that weeps with me.

Singing O Willow Waly, till my lover returns to me."

He stopped and then turned to her with a smile.

The Viktor in front of her looked so different from her memories, there was warmth and kindness irradiating from within him. His face soft and pure like an angel.

Old Viktor wasn't like that, from what Cait remembered. Viktor never was beautiful nor handsome, he wasn't overly cute either, his sharp features weren't in the taste of everyone. But there had been an unequivocal tenderness in his eyes that endeared him to almost everyone who talked to him.

This Viktor though, he was beautiful.

Cait loved him, she loved him with all her soul; and she would've gotten on her knees to worship him if she didn't know better.

Viktor smiled, "That's the effect I tend to have in people when I'm more present in my body, I'm sorry; I don't control it very well yet."  He took his cane and signaled to a small table with an empty chair. "Would you care for some pancakes? Those are Jayce's favorites."

She shook her head, feeling like a little child that wanted her mother, her dad, her big brother and would cry if she didn't get them soon. "I want to go home."

Viktor nodded his head. "I'm sorry that your stay had to end so abruptly; I wasn't prepared for you to be so... Smart and nosy. I shouldn't have underestimated you. But I hope you can visit us when the little one is born." He put his hand on his abdomen, a slight belly that went unnoticed unless you were searching for it.

Cait slowly shook her head. "I don't think I will."

"Oh, what a shame."

There wasn't anything in her but that deep inner calm that reached to the depths of her soul. "Do you remember it?"

"I remember a lot of things, What exactly do you mean?"

"When you died."

Viktor hummed, he closed his eyes, "I remember... Everything. From when my soul scattered into the infinite like butterflies. When Jayce trapped it again and dragged me back to earth."

"Did it hurt?"

"Everything hurts miss Kiramman."

Cait nodded. "Do you remember eating them? The children?"

"Of course I do. How could I forget? I remember every single one of them. They were… sweet."

"Do you regret it?"

"Do you regret every time a cow dies when you eat beef? Every sheep? Every chicken? Maybe you do, but it's not something you lose sleep over, is it?"

Cait then took a shaky breath, "Are you still Viktor then?"

"Yes, but now I am more than I ever was."

"Are you God?"

"Perhaps I am, I don't think there's a God like the one they have taught you to believe in."

Cait hugged herself. "I want to go home. I want to talk to Violet again, I want to tell her that I'm sorry, that she's right, and I should've never listened to Ambessa."

Viktor nodded with understanding. The soft smile on his face grew bigger. Something grabbed Cait's head and whispered in her ear.

Then run and don't look back.

Suddenly she was outside the house, her suitcases packed neatly by her side, and a carriage slowly coming to pick her up.

----------------------------------------------

(I wish I could tell you that as long as you are safe and sound. I would've been happy, but I am a selfish man.

I should've let go of this love years ago; but I feel like a lost child without you, and I have decided that this love will be my penitence.

I'm sorry that I left you with no choice, I didn't mean to; but these must sound like empty words to you.)

When Jayce woke up, there was saliva running down his cheeks, his back and neck were killing him. He breathed deeply before yawning and stretching in his chair.

"Thought I lost you there for a moment." Viktor's soft voice interrupted his train of thoughts. “I was about to call a doctor.”

Jayce smiled, "I thought you had already gone home."

Viktor smiled; the two of them, alone together in the cold, dark lab. It felt like warmth every time he looked at his partner. His messy hair, those eye bags and the hollow cheeks. Everything that made Viktor be who he is.

"And leave you here alone with all the fun?" He gifted Jayce his pretty crooked smile.

"Yeah..." Jayce breathed deeply. "I just feel like this prototype is killing me."

Viktor chuckled, "Funny how Piltovians talk about death."

Jayce frowned, "what?"

"Is just... Piltovians have a tendency to use death as a metaphor for nonsensical reasons. Everyone here is always saying things like 'I would die for this', or 'this is to die for', but when you are actually confronted with real death, you look the other way and pretend it never happened."

"Yeah, who wouldn't? Death is awful."

Viktor lifted an eyebrow, "Such a bold statement taking into consideration how I found you the night I talked with Heimerdinger."

"That was because I thought I lost everything, then living was going to be worse than dying."

"Dying is not awful, Jayce, is normal."

"I mean, if you hate your life, probably. But what about now? Look at us, we have this, the research, we are fine and happy, would you be fine with dying now?"

That seemed to have struck something within Viktor, "It's not about whether I want to or not. Of course I don't want to, but death comes to us all Jayce. You need to come to terms with that."

"I don't think I do; I mean, science has advanced so much in the past few years, it is so out there to think that one day we will eradicate death?"

Viktor hummed. "In Zaun, death is everywhere. It is not something you can pretend not to know, is a reality that gets thrown at you since childhood." He paused for a moment. "When I was a kid, I used to go to the cemetery, you know?"

"That's creepy."

"It was the only place a child like me could go to have some moments alone, away from everyone else. It was, eh... peaceful, like a fresh breath of air in the morning. It gave me time to meditate…” He smiled, “I don't think dying is wrong, you know? Sure, I love living, but I don't understand why we have to be afraid of something so natural. Animals die so we can eat, plants die, so the animals can eat, we die, so plants can eat us, it's so common, yet so wonderful to think about it. We are part of everything and death is what connects us to all."

Jayce chuckled, "sorry Viktor, but that just sounds like something someone who is dying would say to not face reality."

Viktor's eyes widened for a moment, then he smiled. It was a smile so sweet, yet so sad; and there was something unknown in his eyes. "Perhaps you are right... Perhaps there's nothing good in death. However; I choose to believe that life is wonderful and natural, almost as natural as dying" 

Jayce rolled his eyes with amusement.

Viktor sighed and stood up. "I'll go home, take a shower and come back later. Can you be alone without causing a mess?"

"I'll try my best."

Viktor nodded, he took his crutch and began walking to the door. "Goodbye Jayce."

He just looked at the other's back, going away slowly. 

"Goodbye Viktor."

----------------------------------------------

Jayce walked through the hallways of the house, he touched the firm walls and felt it alive, moving. He knew Viktor didn't do it on purpose, it was simply like breathing without thinking for him. 

When Viktor returned to this world, he seemed so confused, everything around him changed and shifted, reality shaping itself to whatever Viktor felt, without him even realizing. 

I am everywhere, everything, everyone and every time. I am.

Viktor now was awfully similar to how he was before. The strands of hair he left on the pillow every morning, the way his toothbrush left a water stain on the sink because he couldn't be bothered to put it in the cup alongside Jayce's, how he still curled his hair around his finger when he was thinking.

The same but different.

Jayce sighed, and opened a random door, it was always the right one anyway.

He found the kitchen, Viktor pouring coffee into a mug, a plate full of pancakes with butter and strawberry jam for Jayce, another one covered in honey for Viktor.

He smiled and went to sit down at the small table. 

"Where's Cait?"

"She wanted to go, so I sent her on her way."

"Do you think she'll want to come back?"

"Unlikely."

"Do you think she'll want to do something to you or the baby?"

"What could she do to me or my baby? Realistically."

Jayce shrugged, he began eating. Viktor gave him the mug with coffee, then poured a glass of milk for himself.

"I need to eat more often." Viktor muttered before sitting down. "Once a month is not enough anymore, I need to eat at least once every two weeks for the baby."

Jayce stopped mid-bite. "Viktor... We've talked about this."

"I can feel her inside me, her energy being depleted when I go without, my body straining to give her energy. It's going to hurt us both eventually."

"What we are doing right now, is not ok. These are people Viktor—"

He shook his head. "I don't care anymore, I don't care about random people who would've looked down on me when it comes to my daughter. I need more energy, Jayce."

Jayce put down his fork, he covered his face with his hands and groaned. What led them to this? It was one thing to do horrible things once, but repeating it again and again… There was so much banality within this evil.

"You don't need to help if you don't want to. You don't even need to know."

Jayce's hands fell to his lap and he looked at Viktor. Beautiful Viktor, he had ripped Jayce's heart out when he died, and it still hurt; everything that it could've been, but it wasn't because Jayce had been a coward burnt him like red-hot iron.

Sometimes he felt as if everything slowed down, as if Jayce was alone again, his immense pain and regret, entire nights on his own sobbing into his pillow. Even when innocent blood was on his hands, nothing hurt quite like loving Viktor did.

"No, I want to help, I want to be with you. Always."

Viktor nodded. Jayce resumed eating, his partner grabbed the fork, starting to cut the pancake into little pieces before eating them.

They didn't give him energy, but he liked them. It was funny how after everything, Viktor still liked sweetness.

"I think I've decided on a name."

Jayce breathed deeply and put his fork down, "what name?" It came out as a whisper.

"Ximena."

With a quick movement, he stood up and went to hug Viktor.

When he had his arms around him, he gave him a kiss on the top of his head; his hair smelled just like it did before that accident, like lavender soap and chamomile tea.

Jayce's eyes filled with tears. He knew that what he was doing was monstrous, that one day everything would turn around and hit him with full force. But Gods, he just wished someone would forgive Viktor and let him take all the punishment instead. He was the only one between the two who was to blame. 

His Viktor, his beautiful Viktor that Jayce had failed so much; just let him have this moment of happiness, even if temporary. Then he would walk into hell willingly.

Just a tiny moment of happiness, like a warm tear in the rain, maybe then, Viktor could forgive him.

----------------------------------------------

I am everywhere, everything, everyone and every time. I am.

Caitlyn looked outside the window as the chariot slowly moved by. She watched as the house and the town slowly disappeared from her sight. The man who lived there was a monster; and her brother, for better or for worse.

The man that she once believed she knew, now Cait understood she never knew him at all.

In house Talis, a man lived there. A man not sane that held unknowable love and darkness within. A man she didn't know, perhaps didn't want to know, but a man she loved nevertheless.

Caitlyn didn't know how the story would end, but for now. Jayce Talis walked in that house, and he didn't walk alone.