Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The porcelain plate clattered a little too hard when Rin set it down. He didn’t mean to, really, but he couldn’t help it. He watched Shidou’s stupid smug grin, Isagi’s stupid smile, and everyone else’s woahs of admiration at what they just heard. He gripped the edge of his seat tighter, glaring down at his plate. 

Here he was, actually looking forward to eating his ochazuke today, and now, with just a few words from Ego, his day was completely and utterly ruined.

No, his week.

Or his month.

Or his year.

Or forever, really.

“Itoshi Sae is coming to Blue Lock.”

He groaned.

Why was everyone else so happy about this?

“So, Rin–rin,” Shidou started, leaning towards him. He narrowed his eyes; loose strands of blonde and pink hair falling on them, lips curving into that stupid smile Rin had grown to absolutely despise. 

 “Underlashes Jr. and Senior gonna fight or—”

“Shidou,” Rin said, voice rough, giving him a sharp glare, “don’t start.” 

Miraculously, Shidou backed off. He raised his hands in surrender, leaning back against his chair. “Well sorry~” He said, in a sing-songy voice.

Huh, maybe today wouldn’t be so terrible. 

Rin reluctantly picked up a spoonful of rice, trying to eat in spite of his lack of appetite. As he took a bite, he relaxed a little, his expression softening as he slumped back against the chair. He dropped the spoon into the bowl again, and lifted his head up to stare at the blinding lights of the cafeteria. 

“Sae…” He muttered quietly under his breath, the name feeling foreign on his tongue. 

I’m gonna fuckin’ crush you.

———————————————————𝜗𝜚 ‧₊˚ ⊹————————————————————

Rin dumped the remaining dishes into the already overcrowded sink, filled with porcelain plates and bowls. He scrunched his nose up in disgust, avoiding the leftover food on the plate as his hand made his way to the faucet handle.

“Animals…all of you.” He murmured, rinsing the dishes. He then decided he wanted absolutely nothing to do with them, and with a quick flick, turned the faucet off as he turned around. He wiped his hand on the kitchen towel, muttering something about cleanliness, or lack thereof. Slowly, he walked past the kitchen counters, hand resting on the cool granite.

“Rin.” A voice said from behind him.

“Isagi.” Rin said, not turning around. 

“Are you okay? You seem more—moodier—than usual.” 

Moodier? Guess he wasn’t that good at concealing things. He pursed his lips together, trying to think of an answer. 

“I’m fine. Mind your own business.” 

“Alright, just checking,” Isagi squeezed his way through Rin and the edge of the counter, walking back up to his group of friends. 

“Isagi!” The one with long red hair said. “What’re you gonna do gonna do this break?” 

Right.

There's a two week break.

Which means, Rin will have to go home and see…

Well, maybe it's best not to think about it.

Rin narrowed his eyes, before retracing his gaze to the exit doors. It was too loud in here, really. He briskly walked past the hoards of people in front of him, careful not to be noticed. He navigated his way through the huge crowds of people,  before shoving the door open, before being greeted by the emptiness of the hallways. It was quiet. Too quiet for Rin’s liking. 

As much as he’d hate to admit it, he had gotten quite used to the liveliness that was Blue Lock, filled with many aspiring hopefuls and their pipe dreams. He continued walking forward, only the clacking of his tattered slippers accompanying him. 

“Yes.” 

He heard a muffled voice coming from one of the rooms, and instinctively slowed his pace down to listen. 

Technically, he wasn’t eavesdropping.

If someone didn’t want their conversation to be heard, they shouldn’t be so loud about it. After all, Itoshi Rin wasn’t one to listen in when he wasn’t involved, but this time, something caught his attention.

He leaned in closer to the door, one ear against it, trying to make out what was happening.

“I’ll be there soon.” 

The muffled voice continued. 

“Yes—I know.”

Rin heard what he sounded like a hum of satisfaction, lifting his head up to process what they were talking about.

“Will R…” 

What? Who was that?

“Tomorr…?”

The voices seemed to be getting more and more muffled as the person on the other end quieted down. 

“Bye…” 

And that was it.

Rin pressed himself against the door to see if he could hear anymore, before hearing the scuffling of footsteps moving closer. He panicked and pushed himself off the door before sprinting away in fear—or tactical walking as he’d like to call it—to the end of the hallway, into his dorm.

——————————————————˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚———————————————————

Sae reached his hand out for the handle, before pulling the door open. He turned both sides, looking down the empty corridors.

Huh, I could’ve sworn I heard someone here.

He shrugged before slamming the door again, and walked back to his bed. He flopped down on the soft mattress, too soft for his liking. It felt like he was stuck in a sink hole he could not escape, the weight of everything pushing him down even further. 

“Thankfully I’m staying in a hotel.” He whispered. 

He raised his phone up over his head, and read the Blue Lock news. As he scrolled, he saw many names pop up, plenty he couldn’t be bothered to remember as he mindlessly scrolled.

He scrolled past headline after headline, eyes disinterested. 

Knock. 

Sae pushed himself off the lumpy bed, the bed creaking and groaning as he did.

“Who is it…?” He said, disinterested. He grabbed the handle and pulled the door open, his eyes meeting the person in front of him. 

In front of him was a tall, slender man wearing thick black glasses.

“Ego.” Sae said, raising an eyebrow. 

“Itoshi Sae,” Ego started, adjusting his cuffs. “Time for you to make an appearance.” 

Chapter Text

“Everyone,” Ego said, raising his hands for a moment of silence as he continued speaking. “Please welcome, Itoshi Sae.” 
 
 

Silence. 

Pin drop silence. 

Then, a clap. 

A cheer or two. 

And suddenly, the whole room turned into cheers of excitement, adrenaline, and maybe even fear. Everyone except Rin, jaw clenched, watching from the dark corner of the room. The world seemed dull, colors turning grey. His heart was beating fast; was it anger…? 

Or, adoration. 

No. That couldn’t be it. 

———————————————————ᝰ.ᐟ——————————————————— 

Sae walked onto the stage, his expression bored. Ego nodded to him, before passing the mic. His eyes scanned the room, before locking eyes with Rin. He didn’t give him a second glance, noticing how Rin turned his head away.  

Huh.  

Guess he’s still in that phase then. 

“To every striker in this room,” Sae started, “I really could not care less about whether or not you’re trying your best. Nor could I care for any of your goals, sob stories, or pipe dreams.” 
 
“I only care about whether any of you are worthy of my passes. Understand?” Everyone in the crowd nodded, waiting for what he’d say next.  

“Don’t disappoint me,” he muttered into the microphone, handing it back to Ego as he turned, walking backstage.   

The crowd stared, uncharacteristically quiet as Sae made his way through the back exit. 

“So,” one started from the crowd, earning a glance from Ego. “So? You all have some work to do, don’t you think, diamonds in the rough?”  
 
 

He waved his hand, signalling the time for everyone to leave. As everyone parted ways, Rin stood at the corner, jaw still clenched, arms crossed. Ego merely spared a glance at him, glasses resting on his nose. “Don’t let him get in the way of your ego, Itoshi.”  
 
“Wasn’t planning on it.”  

Rin pushed himself off of the wall and walked towards the sea of people, making his way through the waves of egos to his dorm.  

He could feel the stares of everyone, burning holes into his back. “Tch,” Rin said, shoving past people.  
 
Everyone knew about what happened during the match against Japan’s U-20. Everyone now knew about Rin and Sae’s relationship, or lack thereof.  

Rin hated it. 

He walked down the grey hallway, now empty as he made his way past the people. He didn’t notice it then, but he was breathing heavily. His posture shrunk even more, if that was possible.  

He walked past that room, the one where the muffled voices came from. He slowed down unintentionally (or maybe not), waiting to see if he could figure out who was in the room. 

“What are you doing here?” A voice said from behind, bored.  

Rin knew that voice. 

He snapped his head around so fast he could’ve sworn it would fall off, as he glared at the source of the voice. “What are you doing here?” He barked, voice harsh as his fists slowly curled. 

“This is my room,” Sae tilted his head towards the door, eyes half lidded,  a lock of his burgundy hair falling on his eyes.  

So the voice behind the door was… 

Shit. 

“So,” Sae said, walking further towards his door. “What’re you doing here?”  

“None of your damn business,” he glared again, his eyes meeting Sae’s. Sae seemingly narrowed his eyes for a few seconds, as if deciding if what Rin said was important enough to care about, before retaining his usual nonchalant expression.  

“Okay then.”  
 
Sae opened the door to his room, the creaking sounds of the metal door doing around nothing to fill the awkward silence that hung in the drab hallway. The door snapped shut, leaving Rin alone again.   

———————————————————˚˖𓍢ִ໋ 𐚁°——————————————————— 

“Yo, Rin-Rin,” Shidou said, leaning down, his face a reflection in Rin’s soup. Rin stared at his soup so hard that the porcelain bowl may have shattered just from his glare.  

Maybe if I don’t look, he’ll disappear. Yeah. That sounds right. 

He glanced up. Shidou was still there. 

Maybe, I have to look away more. He’s like a bug. He’ll fly past me. 

He glanced again. Now, he could’ve sworn Shidou’s grin was wider. 

Fucking hell. 

“What do you want, Antennae Freak?”  

Shidou’s eyes narrowed, his face turning into an uncharacteristic frown. “Well,” he started, pulling out the blue chair across from Rin, the sound seemingly dragging out across the white tiled floor. He sat down,his eyes still set on Rin.  
 
He leaned over the tables, elbows on it, as he rested his chin on his hands, “What’s with you and your brother anyway?”  
 
Rin just stared. 

Who the fuck did this guy think he was? 

Rin opened his mouth to say something, maybe snarky, maybe harsh, or maybe dismissive. Maybe all three. But before he could— 

“Wait, just listen Rin.” Shidou glanced down at his hands, before glancing back up. “I just noticed that you both are kinda…”  
 
“Kinda what?” Rin said, clenching his teeth. 

“Messed up, don’t ya think?”  

So everyone knew. 

“Whatever,” Shidou said again, sighing as he threw his hands behind his head. “I’m not really an expert on this kinda stuff, but have you ever tried talking it out with him? Whatever’s going on with you two?” 
 
Now Rin had nothing left to say. 

Try to talk it out? 
 
 

He’s done that once. 

He could still feel his lungs burning on that snowy night, face still wet from the tears that fell, his palms digging deep into the frigid snow. He watched Sae’s footprints disappear against the heavy blanket of white, the soccer field now empty. It didn’t feel empty though. He could still feel the heavy weight of Sae’s words on him, a shadow of Sae’s figure looming over him. How empty and dull and bored and tired his eyes seemed, a light of ambition that once shone so bright now gone.  

How quick he was to dismiss Rin, to dismiss their dream.  

Talking didn’t work. 

Why would he try again? 
 
 

By the time Rin had a snarky response ready for Shidou, he was already on the other side of the cafeteria, chatting with other people.  

Rin quietly stood up, walking out the cafeteria doors, all the way to the training room. He picked up a ball, nails digging into the leather of it, as he judged its attributes.  
 
He dropped the ball to his feet, and slowly kicked it around.  
 
Slow became moderate. 

Moderate became fast. 

And soon he was scoring, scoring, scoring, and scoring, the only sound in the empty training room being the sound of the ball slamming against the net as it flowed back. Rin had grown to love this sound, crave it even.  

“Rin!” Someone called out from behind him.  
 
“Oh. It’s you.”  
 
“C’mon! You can’t be that disappointed to see me?” Isagi said, giving him a sly grin.  

“What do you want.”  
 
 

“Egos calling all of us to the main room. You included.” 

Great. Just great. 

“So you came all the way over here because…?” 
 
“To tell you of course,” Isagi answered his question like it was expected of him.  

“That’s what friends are for.”  
 
Rin sighed.  

“I’m not your—” But Isagi was halfway out the door, waving his hand.  

Rin rolled his eyes, but followed suit, their footsteps in a rhythmic pace. 

By the time they entered the main room, Ego had already started his speech. 

Long and dramatic and boring and— 

Sae.  

He was leaning against the door, arms crossed, eyes closed, likely tuning out whatever Ego was saying. But that’s not what Rin noticed. 

Sae was wearing his athletic wear, which only meant one thing. 

“He’s playing with us!” The buzzing bee said. He clamped his hand over his mouth as if to not let out a squeal of excitement. His eyes lit up, if they could even be brighter than they were usually.  
 
 

“Bachira…” Isagi said, hand hovering his shoulder as if Bachira were to jump and run away. “You probably shouldn’t be so loud.” 
 
“They can’t silence me!”  

He yelled, earning him a glare from Ego. 

Sae watched their interaction from afar, or more so, Isagi. 

Isagi. 

Out of everyone the great Itoshi Sae decided to set his gaze on, it had to be him. 

It was like God himself was trying to spite Rin. 

Worst of all, when Sae was done gazing at the talking blue berry, his attention immediately turned to the pink freak in front of him. 

Shidou. 

It was like Rin didn’t even exist. 

Not one “Hi”, or “How are you?” or, “I’m so sorry for giving up on our dream together.”  

Maybe Sae was trying to spite Rin too.  
 
 

Chapter Text

  “First up,” Sae said, kicking the ball between his feet. “Basic drills,” he quickly tapped the ball before shooting it towards the goal.

“Tch,” Barou said, arms crossed. “Show off.” 

“How many goals can you guys shoot in three minutes?”

He didn’t wait for an answer though, as he kicked another ball towards Shidou. “Oh?” Shidou said, his grin widening, “me first? Can’t wait to see me in action, huh?” 

Disgusting, Rin thought.

Sae let out a sigh as if he’s seen worse, “shut it, demon.”  

———————————————————˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥——————————————————

“Man,” Bachira said, falling onto the bench in the lockers, arms outstretched.  “That was soooooo tiring!!” 

“You’re telling me,” Isagi replied, taking sips from his water bottle. “Who knew he could be capable of such rigorous training…” 

Rin sat on the wooden bench across from the duo, towel slung around his neck.

“What a workout!” Shidou said, waltzing into the locker room like he owned the place, “makes me love him even more.” He opened his locker to take out his duffel bag, pulling out new clothes. “Say Rin–Rin,” he started, glancing up at him. “How’d it feel to not be chosen by your own brother?” 

The idle chatter ceased to exist as everyone's eyes were now on Rin and Shidou.

“Oh boy,” Bachira said, whistling. Everyone in the room exchanged awkward looks, clearly dreading the inevitable. “How long till they start fighting?” Chigiri whispered to Isagi, leaning in. 

“Two minutes tops,” he replied back, eyes not leaving the dilemma in front of him.

“What the fuck did you just say?” Rin bit back, already standing back up.

Shidou only grinned, walking further to close the distance between them. “You heard me,” he leaned in even closer, as if analyzing everything Rin would do. Rin glared, eyes staring into Shidou’s, “shut your fucking mouth.” 

Shidou didn’t say anything, but his eyes narrowed. He tilted his head, one hand to his chin as he spoke.

“So it's that bad, huh?” 

What?

He pulled back, not elaborating on what he meant as he turned around, picking up his black duffel bag.

“What are you talking about, you freak?”

Shidou glanced back, giving Rin a grin.

“Nothin’, Rin–rin! Fix your relationship with your brother will ya? After all, I can't have you both on bad terms at me and Sae–chan’s wedding!”

“You—” Rin gritted out, already about to lay a hit on him. Shidou however, dodged, and blew him a kiss instead, winking at him. Rin stood there, feeling everyone’s eyes on him.

God, he was so easy to provoke right now, it made him want to die. 

“Although, Rin,” Shidou remarked, looking up thoughtfully, “you did hold your own against him, I’ll give you that. Maybe…”

He glanced back at Rin again, “you might just win against him one day.” 

——————————————————﹒⪩⪨﹒——————————————————

Isagi kicked the ball into the goal as the others watched from the sidelines. 

Sae clicked the stopwatch, and looked back up at Isagi. 

“Alright then,” he started, tossing the metal watch into the air. “Your three minutes are up.” 

“Now,” he said, watching as Isagi joined everyone else on the sidelines. “Let’s have a scrimmage, five on fives.” 

Everyone stood in a straight line, waiting to see who would get chosen first. Rin picked at the loose string of his jersey, wrapping the blue yarn around his finger. His posture was straight for once, as he stood tall.

“The first nine strikers who will be playing…” Sae started.

“Bachira Meguru,” he pointed to the bee, “Shidou Ryusei, Isagi Yoichi, and Barou Shohei.”

He picked up a clipboard from the desk. “Chigiri Hyoma, Reo Mikage, Nagi Seishiro, Gin Gagamaru, and Itoshi Rin. I will be on one team, serving as the team captain. The other team can choose who they want as their captain for the scrimmage today.”

He wrote something down on the clipboard.

“The four on my team will be Shidou Ryusei,” Shidou walked out of the line towards Sae, before leaning in and mumbling something Rin couldn’t make out, earning him a playful glare from Sae. “Reo Mikage, Chigiri Hyoma, and…”

Sae merely glanced up from his clipboard. “Isagi Yoichi.”

You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.

—————————————————-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-—————————————————

Rin sat at the edge of his bed in the dimly lit dorm, thinking about what happened. He had his knees to his chest, breathing uneven, staring at the cold grey tiled floor. The stretchy string from the hem of his sleeve was wrapped around his finger, twisting and twisting until he couldn’t feel his fingertip.

You shitty brother.

He said that.

 Again.

And once again, the Great Itoshi Sae did not seem to bat an eye, only pushing him out of the way for his own gain.

“Dammit,” Rin muttered, eyes now squeezed shut. He couldn’t bear to look forward, look into the mirror facing him, for he knew he wouldn’t see himself.

He never did. 

He let his head rest on his knees, before falling back onto the bed entirely. He tossed and turned, the dingy fan creaking at every turn. The faster it moved, the more it seemed it was going to fall off the hinges entirely.

Knock.

“Yo, Rin, you there?” 

God, what was it with these absolute lukewarms bothering him all the time?

He didn’t say anything, and didn't need to as Isagi walked into the room, a plate full of food. He carefully set the porcelain plate down at Rin’s desk, making sure not to disturb him. 

The words came out of Rin’s mouth before he could stop them.

“Why’d you all say that to him?” 

——————————————————◛⑅·˚ ༘ ♡——————————————————

“Sae-chan!” Shidou yelled, running towards him. “Pass would ya?” 

“Depends,” Sae responded, voice dry, “are you worthy enough?”

“Awh,” Shidou said, “playin’ hard to get?” 

Sae rolled his eyes, running forward before clearing the ball to him. “Thanks!” Shidou yelled, already getting ready to score. He pulled his leg back, foot touching the ball when—

Smack.

Rin blocked the goal, “you’re not scoring, you freak.” 

“Woah Rin–rin! Jealousy doesn’t suit you~”

Rin ran forward to the other side of the field, the ball in between his feet, muttering, “I’m not jealous of you.”

As he was running, he felt an arm across his chest. “Why’d you never break out of that drooling habit?”

Fucking Sae.

“Shut it! Shitty older brother.” 

Rin shoved, or at least attempted to shove, Sae out the way, his focus on the goal, now close to him. Sae watched him and the ball, gaze cold and calculated. “With that attitude,” he said, stealing the ball from Rin.

“You’ll never defeat me.” 

No.

No. No. No.

Not again.

Not this time.

Rin, holding an anger so strong it might just burst out, lunged at Sae? Or the ball? It didn’t matter.

He quickly intercepted Sae’s pass back to whatever lukewarm was waiting for it, he didn’t care. Now the only thing he cared about was scoring again. “Damn you…” He gritted his teeth, the words barely sensible in this monstrous state.

Sae’s eyes widened, only slightly, such a small detail to notice in a world of so much more, but Rin—no, everyone, saw it. That small show of emotion was enough to get Rin to weave past the other defenders, lifting his leg up and scoring the final goal.

Itoshi Sae, for the second time, had just underestimated his brother.