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Dipper anxiously made his way down the stairs. Each step echoing down the hall, in a way that made him shiver throughout his whole body.
He had fought zombies,
been possessed by a demon (and his sister),
survived Gideon,
defeated a hundred year old ghost,
uncovered government secrets,
lived the whole summer with his Grunkle Stan,
but being face to face with his Great Uncle Ford after the D&D& more D adventure? That terrified him.
Even with his heightening anxiety, Dipper managed to reach the bottom of the stairs without peeing himself. He held his breath as he looked up at the lab. His eyes barely scanned the chaotic state of the room before landing on his great uncle. Ford was hunched over his desk; likely making one of his doo-dads, or writing in his journal. As Dipper took a step closer Ford shot up, and twisted his neck toward his great nephew. His six-fingered hand raised up to remove the protective goggles obstructing his sight.
"Ah! Dipper. Yes, yes, come on in," He beckoned.
The boy stepped closer; tilting his head to get a better look at whatever his great uncle was working on. Ford cleared his throat, nearly scaring Dipper into his death bead, before turning towards the child.
"I suspect you are more than capable of accompanying me?" He smiled.
"Uhm- I- Yeah!... Wait what?" Dipper stammered
"Take a look at this, Dipper," Ford turned back to his desk; grabbing a strange object and holding it out towards his awestruck nephew, "This may appear to be a regular button," he explained while flipping a switch on the metal slab, "It is actually a portal!"
"Woah! What? How.. How does it work? Couldn't it be dangerous? What about Bill?"
Ford interrupted his nephew's onslaught of questions, "Knowing Bill; I created a pupil-scanning device that would hinder any attempt of unauthorized usage."
"How did you figure that out?" Dipper questioned
"That is unimportant. What is important though is this portal. After passing the pupil scanning test its metal door will open. Revealing a red button that can travel us to any dimension. Sort of."
"Sort of?" Dipper repeated. His gaze fixed on the peculiar steel box.
"It's randomized. Ergo, wherever we end up will be strictly up to chance. So we could end up in a magical candy land full of dancing gummy bears, and singing lollipops. Or, we could be transferred right to Bill's doorstep," Ford specified with a weary frown.
Dipper glanced up at his great uncle, and back down at the rectangular device. His face was painted with evident curiosity, and undisputed wonder.
"So... What do you need me here for?" Dipper mumbled.
"Ha ha! Dipper, I'm inviting you to join me in traveling the multiverse."
"What!? Why? How?.. or better yet, when would we return?" He sputtered.
"I think you're capable enough to join me on such a dangerous voyage. After battling Probabilitor the Annoying with you; I see the potential within you to become a brilliant scientist," Ford rested a six-fingered hand on Dipper's shoulder. "Oh! And if you twist the button three-sixty degrees, we'll be warped back to our home dimension," he assured, "It's just up to you."
Ford stared down at his nephew hopefully. Dippers gaze raced everywhere; dodging meeting his uncles. He clenched his fists with anxiety. Stressed about his onslaught thoughts begging to come out. He relaxed his body with a heavy exhale.
"Well. When do we go?" Dipper lightheartedly smiled.
"I'd say about now if we want to get home before my brother clogs the toilet"
Without another word; Ford lifted the bottom of the contraption to his eye, and as if magic, it's metal hatch folded into itself. A glowing red button burned into Dipper's curious eyes. Before his grunkle could utter another breath; into another one of his extensive explanations. Dipper's hand met with the illuminated button's surface.
FIZZ
The machine let out a loud pop. White light filled the room within a fraction of a second. Blinding the both of them momentarily.
Dipper was the first to lose the ringing in his ears, and look around.
A colorful world with swirling clouds, and a cartoon-ish sun loomed high in the sky. The array of well garnished shops and houses indicated a town square of some kind. He continued to glance around; his eyes landing on something horrifying. A pink cartoon horse pranced through the street. As he anxiously looked all around him he saw nothing, but colorful cartoon horses. Some with wings, or horns, or little symbols on their hip. Dipper recognized the area immediately. My Little Sparkle Friend Pony; one of Mabel's shows shes notorious for watching on replay. He immediately looked down at his hands. Only to find two hooves with white fur. Panicked, he looked up at his grunkle for help.
The mahogany horse before him seemed to still be in a daze. His hoof was rubbing his seemingly irritated eye. A short grey mane, topped with two interlocking horns, snaked down his uncle's neck. Ford's signature brown coat draped over his long torso. The shining six-fingered hand emblem from Bill's zodiac was changed to a gold image of two horns that seemed to be engraved into his hip.
The horse looked up at Dipper; blinking a few times in surprise.
"Dipper?" The larger pony asked in Ford's usual tone.
"Great Uncle Ford!" Dipper laughed in relief.
"Where?..." He trailed off. Taking in the strange world around him.
"My Little Sparkle Friend Pony," Dipper winced, "It's a popular kids show about horses teaching each other about 'the magic of glitter sparkles, and friendship!' "
"Peculiar."
Ford turned back to his shorter, but infinitely more anxious, nephew. His fur was white with a matching mane. And a blue pine tree was engraved into the troubled foals hip.
Dipper dipped his head, and quickly glanced around in a panic. He walked in a circle thoughtfully; biting on his hoof whenever he ceased motion. And whispering his thoughts aloud to himself.
"What's the matter, Dipper?"
"ᵂʰᵉʳᵉˢ ᵗʰᵉ ᵖᵒʳᵗᵃˡ" He anxiously paced.
"I didn't quite catch that."
"Wheres the portal" Dipper repeated.
The realization hit Ford like a wave. Keeping his cool; he craned his neck around to scan the area. Though one item stood out from the cartoon art style. He galloped over to a farmers market stand. Where he came eye to eye to two identical tan and lean ponies with red and white hats. Their only differentiating feature was one of the brothers having a curled mustache. Attempting to conceal his dour expression towards the twins; he put his hoof over one of the items at their stand. The cold steel slab rested firmly under his hoof; foolishly left open, and exposing its dangerously arbitrary button.
"That ya' one pricey piece," The stached horse spoke.
"Tsk' tsk' shes an ancient relic'. Rumored to have been owned by Princess Luna h'rself."
"But ey', we can hand her' over to you at a discount," He butted back in with a wink. That reminded Ford of his disappointingly similar con-man of a twin.
"I have places I have to be," Ford threatened; sliding the portal closer to him.
Once the men raised their voices at the robber, then, Dipper noticed his grunkle. Ford knocked his ray gun out of his coat. Dropping it pitifully on the ground as he realized hooves don't have thumbs.
Dipper dashed after his uncle in a panic. Galloping right into the man's back, and knocking him into the button. The two blinked out of existence. Leaving a flash of bright light, and a crowd of confused ponies overhearing the event.
The two rematerialized outside of a white house. A young man wearing glasses and a green creature on his shirt stared at them. He pulled out an old-school PDA and typed quickly. Blue dialogue appeared beside the boy like a billboard.
EG: hello :D
Dipper opened his mouth to speak, but blue words just appeared beside him as well.
DP: Hi.
He tried to whisper to Ford but the text just stacked on top of itself.
DP: Where is this???
FP: I'm unsure. But looking around we seem to be in some sort of neighborhood.
DP: We need to find the teleporter.
EG: teleporter??????
The Pine's turned to the kid.
DP: To keep things short.
DP: Have you seen a steel box anywhere?
The kid paused for a second.
EG: I'm not sure, but i do know I have a birthday present in my dads car
EG: just not a way inside
Ford shivered off the kids grammatical errors and reached for his blaster. But to no avail he couldn't grab it.
EG: is your strife specibus something else?
EG: that could be your issue
FP: Strife what?
FP: Damnit. Don't even bother.
FP: I've got this.
He begrudgingly hobbled over to the white car parked in the driveway. Dipper only a few places behind him.
EG: HEY!
EG: WAIT!!!!
Ford punched his fist through the glass. Grabbing the green box sitting in the passenger seat and ripping it open.
The kid watched in horror as the mysterious man threw a plush rabbit out of the box; then, lifting a steel slab that was beneath it.
Ford gripped Dipper's shoulder and pressed the button; silently praying for a better grammatically educated dimension.
Dipper lifted his head out of a mound of snow; glancing around for his uncle. Not long after; up popped a robot's head out of the thick snow. He waved his hand above the other robot's loading screen. It blinked awake and glanced around quickly. The lack of feeling of snow brought both of them to question if they were freezing, or undead. But a quick gander at each other's new forms answered it quite quickly. They looked nearly identical; robot body, big head, visor, but Dipper adorned his pine tree hat while Ford's visor illuminated a faint yellow.
"We seem to be in some sort of apocalyptic world?" Ford inquired.
"And were robots," Dipper added; flexing his robo arm.
A large swoop of air shot over them. Whatever it was, it had just crashed barely half a mile away from them. Both of them could feel something was off. Ford started digging into the snow, and his nephew followed soot.
Ford lifted up the slab in triumph. Yanking his great nephew out of the snow and pressing the glowing button. Right as they vanished a bot with organic wings cursed.
"Shit! I cant find anyone who knows about-" The purple drone complained to another, much larger, yellow drone approaching.
Ford awoke on a stage by a colorful cast of various characters. None of which he could care about without finding where Dipper (and the teleporter) went.
A purple rabbit started making snarky remarks but Ford just shoved past him.
"You're an interesting sight," The rabbit snarked.
Without a word Ford continued to look around. Brushing off anyone who came towards him. The ridiculous looking creatures around him caused more of an eyesore than the M-dimension he loathed. When he spotted a blue dog wearing a vest, he knew who that had to have been.
Dipper's eyes locked onto the figure approaching him. The tall ring-like figure approached him slowly. Dipper was hesitant until he saw the creatures outstretched six-fingered hand. He accepted the gesture, and was helped up to his feet.
"I have an odd feeling about this place. Lay low," Ford murmured.
Dipper replied with a subtle nod as his grunkle kept an eye out for the button. An odd bubble creature with bug eyes and sharp teeth floated past the curious dog. Dipper squinted his eyes; fixating onto the metal box floating in its stomach.
"Hey!-" His uncle's name eluded Dipper's mind. "This... thing has it!"
Ford contorted his body around. Snapping onto the bubble staring right back at him. He took a few long strides towards the floating creature; raising up his hand with an outstretched finger.
"I hope you have a sh*t da-" The bubble spoke in a high tone before being rudely interrupted. He popped into nothing; dropping the button right into Ford's hands.
Dipper clung to his uncles arm, and looked back at the odd cast of characters. With that, the two blinked out of existence again.
The tween held his spinning head as he glanced around the 2-D world. His uncle was thankfully right next to him. He peered out the large window; looking down at the rows of windows and text. They were distorted, but seemed to be illustrations of folks around Gravity Falls. The puzzling sight had him glance back over at his grunkle for help. Ford took two glances out the window and jumped down to the next one.
"Great Uncle Ford!!" Dipper panicked.
With a skeptical swallow; he followed after Ford. The terrifying feeling of falling was abruptly stopped by two long arms. Dipper opened his eyes, and peered back at his smiling grunkle.
"Phew... hahaa....." Dipper sputtered.
"I'm unsure of this location. But I'm not fond of it," Ford spoke with a sigh.
Ford placed Dipper back onto his feet as the two of them stared at a familiar foe. Bill cipher blinked at them innocently. He felt...odd
The triangle nearly screamed with excitement at the sight of Ford. Causing unnerve through the Pines.
"Oh Fordsy!" he squealed.
Ford winced at the name. He grabbed Dipper's wrist and jumped out the window. Bill ran to the edge with tears in his eye as he witnessed his 'love' escape.
"This cant be any worse than that." Ford shivered.
"Seems like it... You?" Dipper cocked his head.
Ford turned to see what his nephew was talking about. Physically recoiling at the sight before him. It was himself, but thin. Very thin. With some sort of buff triangle figure right next to him, growling. This time Ford jumped out the window without grabbing right onto the next box. He stared at the near infinite pages he and his screaming nephew fell down. At the top was a 'search bar' that Mabel had told him about. In fact this site looked exactly like the one she was showing him. Tumblr. The grammar error drove him into a thirty minute long rant about companies being incompetent.
He looked over at his screaming nephew; grabbing his arm and flinging the child upwards. Dipper collided right on top of the search bar; staring down at his grunkle and the sea of images flying past.
"Use the bar search!" Ford called out.
"Search bar," Dipper corrected.
The look on Ford's face told him he didn't want an internet lesson at the moment. Dipper turned his focus back down at the block beneath him. He reached his hand over the bar, glancing quickly at the search history.
Billford
Gravity Falls
Alex Hurghs
Bill Cipher
Gravity Falls AU
Ford Pines
Stan Pines
Fanart
Stancest
He quickly realized that every sentence was just more money going right into therapy.
He looked around for a keyboard or anything. Locking his eyes down at his grunkle, who had landed on just the thing. Ford typed B, U, T, T, O, N, and enter. The keyboard vanished beneath Ford as the page loaded the new search. Dipper jumped into one of the windows; holding the button out to Ford.
Ford grabbed onto the scrollbar; launching himself up, and into the same window as his nephew.
He stared down at his beaming nephew. The kid had a bright future ahead of him. Ford only hoped he chose better decisions than he did at Dipper's naive age.
Dipper grabbed onto his tunnlevisioned great uncle's cloak and pressed a small, pale hand onto the faint buttons glow.
The world blurred back into focus. Dipper spat grass out of his mouth, and glanced around at the overly familiar forest surrounding him. Directly behind him was a place he never could have imagined he would be excited to see. The Mystery Shack.
It stood on its sad little hill; surrounded by tourists cars. The breeze carried the smell of bark and grass. Birds of many sizes flapped rhythmically above the treeline.
Dipper sat up on the dew-covered grass, and glanced around for his Uncle Ford. The older man approached with light steps. His outstretched six-fingered hand helped the dazed kid to his feet.
The two walked toward The Mystery Shack. Both relishing the silence and still noises of the forest around them.
They entered the tourist trap; not as acquaintances, but as family.