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“So have you thought of your request, Arisugawa-san?”
“Yes. I wish to play a role like me.”
“A role like you?”
“Indeed.”
“Well, if it’s Arisugawa-san, I imagine an elegant role for you… Maybe an elegant military general who likes arts? A genius military strategist?”
Homare is smiling but his silence bothers Tsuzuru.
“...that’s not it, is it?”
Homare chuckles. “Who is Arisugawa Homare to you?”
“Eh?”
“Heh, I leave it up to your interpretation. I know you read your actors very well, so I believe you can figure it out on your own.” Then Homare leaves the room.
That’s…a weird request. Then again it’s Homare.
But if elegance, arts, and talent aren’t what Homare wants in his role, then what does he want?
In Mankai, Tsuzuru has always successfully tailored a role to an actor, but this time Homare gives him one hell of a challenge. Homare is…a complicated person to say the least. He’s an eccentric and genius artist alright, but something seems amiss if he simply integrates that aspect into his upcoming role.
There has to be something beyond that, but what is it?
Now that Tsuzuru thinks of it, there are many things he doesn’t know about Homare.
He starts by reading Homare’s poetry anthology (which is shared with him for their so-called Literature Club). Problem? Those poems reveal NOTHING. Just random words strung together, most of the time they got that nice beat but sometimes they’re just utterly random.
At most they just let Tsuzuru know that Homare is an eccentric poet. Well, everyone already knows that!
Now it’s so late at night, and Tsuzuru thinks he should go outside to clear his head a bit. Then he runs into Chikage, who immediately asks him, “Something the matter?”
Tsuzuru wonders what Chikage knows about Homare, but it won’t hurt to ask. After all Chikage has once helped Homare film a VLOG.
…
…
…
That VLOG was about Homare’s failure, wasn’t it?
“Chikage-san, tell me what you know about Arisugawa-san.”
“It’s for the script, isn’t it?”
“Yeah.”
“He’s a genius artist.”
Tsuzuru wonders if Chikage is fooling around.
“He’s also a funny guy.”
Tsuzuru really thinks Chikage is fooling around.
“But he hides some dark secrets.”
Now this is getting interesting.
“He used to forge arts and is well-acquainted with my family.”
“Whoa, I didn’t know that! A lead with a shady past… I think that’s what Arisugawa-san wants.”
And suddenly, Chikage says, “I lied.”
“CHIKAGE-SAN!”
“You’re always so trusting. That’ll make you struggle understanding Homare-san, you know?”
“Eh?”
“Listen, do you know what was the failure he showed me for that VLOG project?”
“I remember watching the VLOG. I believe it was a weird-looking vase…or was that even a vase?”
“Do you think that’s really his failure?”
“I think it is. That ‘vase’ probably doesn’t reach his standard of art.”
“That’s it?”
“Yeah? Or maybe it’s a lie because he has always been so talented in art?”
Chikage smirks. “Well, you’re getting better at suspecting stuff at least.”
“Chikage-san!”
“That failure is a special kind of lie. Homare-san wasn’t lying, but that wasn’t true either. More like, that wasn’t the whole truth.”
“Not the whole truth?”
“Well, sure, that vase is a failure, but Homare-san is also not the type to show his failure just like that… In other words, that vase is just to answer his fans without exposing too much of himself.”
“Damn, I didn’t know he was that complicated. So, maybe he hides something really messy.”
“You’re getting there.”
“Thanks for the insight, Chikage-san. I think I know where to start now.”
🔎
Tsuzuru never expects that encounter with Chikage to be enough for him to finalize Gui Yu, Homare’s role in the upcoming play. He decides to throw art and elegance outta the window and leave behind a rash yet resolute warrior. The brawn of the brain-and-brawn brother duo. This mess of a man is probably the answer to Homare’s request.
Or is it?
Tsuzuru feels a tad nervous because Gui Yu is nothing like Homare image-wise, and fans may not warm up to this idea. Maybe if it’s just a side play they can slip by, but this isn’t only a troupe play, but also Homare’s second and long-awaited lead role. The risk of backlash is big and terrifying.
Anyway, he decides to show Homare the script. Tsuzuru tries to not show his nervousness as he waits for Homare to finish reading it.
…
…
…
“Bravo, Tsuzuru-kun! I knew you would figure it out on your own!”
“Well, actually I had a little help from Chikage-san…”
“Oh?”
“We talked about your vase for the VLOG project and it inspired me.”
Homare looks a little unnerved, his face is like saying, “oh shit he knows.”
“You’re a really interesting person, Arisugawa-san.”
Homare smiles again. “I am glad you think so.”
“I did get a little worried when writing Gui Yu to answer your request. He’s not much like you on the surface, and fans may not like the idea…”
…
…
…
“Well, then, Tsuzuru-kun, I have a question for you. I am particularly interested in your answer because you are a writer. What is ‘love’ to you?”
Tsuzuru is pretty sure he has been asked the same question by Masumi a long time ago. But if Homare wants the answer…
“I think…love is beautiful even if it’s unrewarded.”
“A painful love… It is not a perfect kind of love, but its imperfection is why it is beautiful. I like your answer.”
Tsuzuru is pretty sure that Homare looks a little sad when saying that, despite the smile. “Then, Arisugawa-san, can I ask you the same question? What is ‘love’ to you?”
“To me…” Homare pauses. “Love is unconditional. If you can accept flawed, imperfect things, then that is love.”
“That’s…deep.”
“Honestly, I asked you this question because I want you to not worry about what fans will think about Gui Yu. Gui Yu is a deeply flawed man without poetic grace, and I will wholeheartedly play him because his flaws and his steadfastness are just like me. If fans cannot accept me as Gui Yu, then they are never my fans to begin with.”
“Arisugawa-san…”
“I cannot wait to start the rehearsal! Thank you for the wonderful role, Tsuzuru-kun!”“You’re welcome.”
As Tsuzuru leaves the room, he can’t help but think, maybe Homare is just someone who longs for genuine acceptance beyond his art.