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Ritsu always excelled at school; there was no subject that he didn't pass with the highest grade. He was handsome and had a reputation for being well-behaved and polite.
You could say he was perfect, at least that's how all the students described him.
"The cities attacked were Hiroshima and Nagasaki. It's estimated that around 70,000 people died in Hiroshima, and between 39,000 and 80,000 in Nagasaki." Ritsu responded to the teacher's question, leaving many of his classmates surprised by the amount of extra information he had revealed.
"That's correct, Kageyama. Would you mind coming to the board and writing your answer?"
"Of course not."
Ritsu rose from his seat almost robotically, walked with a small but precise steps to the blackboard and carefully took the chalk that the teacher offered him, wrote down what he said previously with a calligraphy almost identical to a typewriter and sat back in his chair under the admiring glances of all his classmates.
Everyone wanted to be as smart as him.
And Ritsu just smiled inwardly, proud of who he was. He had grown up being followed and admired by many; that, in a way, had instilled a system of complacency in him, leading him to the pont of fulfilling everyone's expectations of him to the letter in order to feel important. Maybe he went a
little too far.
After History class ended, Ritsu headed to his locker to grab some books for the upcoming activities he'd have to attend to. After grabbing everything he needed, he turned around and saw a redhead boy that instantly caught his attention.
Shou was quite attractive.
Ritsu's cheeks turned a crimson that contrasted with the pale tone of his skin as he clutched the books to his chest and pressed his lips together, not wanting to let any sighs escape them.
He wouldn't allow himself to pine over a boy. That wouldn't be right.
He followed the same path as Shou, except that Ritsu, instead of entering the classroom, turned toward another room where the student council would be having a meeting — and of course, he couldn’t miss it; after all, he was the vice president.
He considered asking Shou to join the student council, arguing that, as the son of a businessman, he'd be well-versed in accounting and could help them manage the school's funds. He actually wanted to spend more time with him.
He pressed one of his hands against his chest; was it right to feel this kind of attraction?
He explained his proposal to the other council members, and in the blink of an eye, they had pulled Shou out of his classroom, and now the boy was standing in front of him with a somewhat confused smile on his face.
It was adorable to see.
"Hi, Suzuki. I wanted to invite you to join the student council; we've been wanting to add someone who can take charge of the school's funds and manage them responsibly and correctly." Ritsu said with his usual upright posture and his neutral gaze fixed on Shou.
Shou laughed a little before nodding his head happily.
"Sure, it would be a pleasure. Although there's no need for such formality, Ritsu."
"Okay then. Come, I'll introduce you to the rest of the members." He took Shou's wrist and led him into the classroom, introducing him to the people inside.
He felt a tingle in his hand as he let go of Shou.
[ . . . ]
Days passed, turning into weeks. Ritsu's grades remained impeccable, but the problem lay with Ritsu himself, who remained in the clouds.
It started with mild dissociation, thinking things like: What would it feel like to intertwine his hands with Shou's? What would it be like to kiss those spongy lips?
He shook his head as thoughts like this flooded his mind. He didn't know why this was happening to him; was it even logical to imagine such scenarios with his best friend?
Was it right for him to like a boy? Was loving Shou okay?
Of course not, it wasn't right.
Personally, Ritsu didn't care whether people were straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, or any other orientation; though he was aware that if he ever walked hand in hand with another man, there would be certain people who would look at them with disgust, and perhaps some of those people could be his classmates. If they found out about his feelings for Shou, all his efforts to be a figure of perfection would go down the drain.
"Earth to Ritsu, can you hear me?" Shou's voice brought him down from the clouds. He was standing in front of him, looking slightly annoyed at the lack of attention he was getting.
"Ah, Suzuki." Even saying his last name filled him with a strange happiness and satisfaction.
"Do you know you can call me by my name? You don't have to use your formalities with me." That statement surprised him.
He had Shou's permission to call him by his name. He could do so freely, and just thinking about it thrilled him a bit too much.
Although, what was so exciting about that, anyway?
"Alright. What's up?" He asked, without letting Suzuki's name leave his lips; he wasn't mentally prepared to do so.
"I didn't hear you say it." Shou answered instead, confusing Ritsu.
"Say what?"
"My name."
"It wasn't necessary for me to do that, the question can be understood wether I said your name or not."
"But I wanted to hear it, anyway."
Ritsu licked his lips, feeling the situation was too surreal.
"Don't be childish and tell me what you had to tell me, Shou." The name on his lips sounded like a beautiful melody, saying it left a tickling sensation on his tongue.
He blinked a few times at Shou's frozen face, wich slowly turned a vermillion color that stood out against his hair. He looked gorgeous.
"Ah, yeah, I… um… you know…" He trailed off, which was really unusual for him.
Ritsu frowned a little, raising an eyebrow to ask what was wrong, but Shou cut him off.
"Well, I was thinking of inviting you over for a sleepover. My dad’s out of town, and it’s boring being alone." Ritsu’s eyes widened slightly, and his cheeks started burning.
"Sure." A smile spread across Shou’s face, and Ritsu returned a shy one.
"You should smile more often, you know." Shou said, then quickly darted down the hallway to his classroom.
Ritsu stayed there, staring at the now-empty hallway, butterflies fluttering in his stomach and his mind spinning through a thousand imaginary scenarios.
He knew it probably wasn’t right to feel this way, but damn, it felt so good.
[ . . . ]
They agreed to meet later that afternoon, so Ritsu told Shou he’d just go home to change and pack a few things he’d need to spend the night.
He walked alongside his brother; as usual, they made small talk, and when they got home, Ritsu let his parents know he’d be spending the night at Shou’s place.
"Are you guys working on a project or something?" his mom asked, curiosity in her voice as she set the food on the table.
"Not really. We’re just going to hang out and have some fun. The exams stressed us out, and we need to recharge." Ritsu said, even though it was a complete lie. The tests had been a breeze for him, and he knew Shou felt the same, but he was willing to say anything if it meant they’d let him go.
"Alright, that’s fine, Ritsu. Just make sure you text me when you get to his place—and when you’re coming back, okay?"
"Yeah, mom."
Ritsu headed up to his room, his mind already buzzing with excitement. He changed into a green hoodie and black pants, grabbed his backpack, and carefully packed his pajamas, his toothbrush, floss, and slippers. Everything was neatly in place. He zipped it up, pulled out his phone, and sent Shou a quick text: “On my way.”
He slipped his phone into the pocket of his hoodie and swung his backpack over his shoulder. He was just about to open the door when Shigeo beat him to it, and they found themselves face to face.
"Ah, Shige. Is everything okay?" he asked quickly, a hint of worry in his voice.
"Yeah, it’s nothing. I just wanted to come by and congratulate you." Shigeo said with a warm smile, stepping fully into the room.
"Congratulate me? For what?"
"For finally taking the break you’ve been needing. I was worried about you—you’re always running around, and I never see you going out and having fun with your friends. I’m really happy for you, Ritsu." Shigeo wrapped him in a tight, affectionate hug. Ritsu couldn’t help but return it, closing his eyes and letting a smile spread across his face.
"Sorry for making you worry so much, Shige." he whispered, reluctantly pulling back. Shigeo just shook his head gently.
"I know you’ve got tons of responsibilities at school, but it’s good to take a break every now and then." They shared a quiet smile, and with that, Ritsu headed toward the living room and stepped out of the house, a lightness in his chest he hadn’t felt in a long time.
It didn’t take long for him to arrive at ShoU’s house—or, more accurately, mansion. Shou came rushing out to greet him, his excitement practically radiating from his face.
Ritsu couldn’t help but think he looked incredibly cute.
"So… what do you want to do? We can watch movies, play on my PlayStation or Xbox, I’ve also got a Nintendo, a Wii U, and board games." Shou's list hit Ritsu like a slap in the face, a stark reminder of just how ridiculously rich this guy was. He only had one console that he played with Shigeo.
"A movie sounds fine." Ritsu said, feeling a little mortified… financially speaking.
"Alright, which one do you want to watch?"
"Uh…" Ritsu hesitated, trying to think of something they’d both enjoy, but before he could answer, Shou interrupted him.
"I know! We have to watch Stranger Things!" Shou exclaimed, practically bouncing with excitement. Ritsu could swear he actually saw sparks flying from his eyes.
"That’s a series, not a movie." He said, a small laugh escaping him.
"But a season is basically like nine movies."
"Touché."
They settled onto Shou’s huge bed, the blankets rumpled beneath them, and started the series.
After only four episodes, the redhead leaned against Ritsu’s shoulder, absentmindedly munching on the popcorn he had gone to make.
Ritsu felt a jolt of nerves shoot through him at the slightest touch. He hated how this feeling only showed up around Shou, the way his heart picked up pace at every brush of skin, every accidental glance. And he loathed having to choke back the sighs that threatened to escape whenever their eyes met.
Ritsu listened to Shou’s occasional commentary, talking to the characters on the screen and then groaning when they didn’t do what he told them. Somehow, Ritsu felt like he could do this for the rest of his life. Listening to Shou’s melodic voice while Shou rested his head on his shoulder felt like a dream he never wanted to wake up from.
"Aren’t you thirsty?" Shou asked, lifting his head and sliding off the bed. Ritsu felt the cold air brush across his shoulder, missing the warmth Sho had been giving him.
"Yeah, a little." He replied, following Shou with his eyes. Anyone watching right now would probably think he wanted to devour him with his gaze.
And they wouldn’t be entirely wrong.
"What do you want to drink?" Shou asked, opening the minibar in his room and pulling out a soda.
"Do you have apple soda?"
"Yep."
Shou grabbed a can of soda and tossed it to Ritsu, who caught it without even trying. Then Shou climbed back onto the bed, popped open his drink, and took a loud gulp that filled the whole room.
"Hey, don’t make so much noise when you swallow, it’s weird." Ritsu muttered, opening his own soda. By now, the show on the screen was completely background noise.
"I’m in my room with the person I trust the most and feel comfortable with. Let me drink however I want." Shou said it like it was nothing, but Ritsu knew it meant a lot.
"The person I trust the most and feel comfortable with." He had actually said that.
Ritsu was the only one who got to see this messy, unpolished side of Shou—and he didn’t think it was messy at all.
If Shou only knew… He was the only one who got to see his own hidden side too: the side full of flaws he worked so hard to hide from everyone else.
Ritsu lowered his soda for a second, not really caring if it spilled while they shifted around on the bed.
"Are you serious?" He asked, looking at Shou with those bright, sparkling eyes he only had around him.
"Why wouldn’t I be?"
They both flushed, unsure of what to do or say. Everything felt so… delicate, like one wrong move could ruin the moment.
Ritsu stared at those turquoise eyes that drove him crazy, and for the first time, he let himself sigh over this redhead.
He actually let himself sigh for a guy.
And that guy was Shou.
He leaned in and kissed the lips that had been silently calling him for so long.
Shou felt like he was floating, completely stunned that Ritsu had made the first move—and still half in shock that it was him he was kissing.
He set his soda on the nightstand and cupped Ritsu’s face, leaning in to continue their awkward, shy kiss.
Ritsu wanted to pull away. Tell Shou it was a mistake. Say they shouldn’t be doing this.
But Shou’s warm hands, the soft press of his lips… he couldn’t.
Screw what anyone else thought. Ritsu loved Shou like crazy. Plain and simple. And right now, he was going to enjoy every second of kissing him.
No more holding back sighs. No more pushing feelings aside. No reason to hide them now—not when Shou had gently pinned him to the bed, still kissing him, and Ritsu would have let him do anything.
They pulled apart, reluctantly, and stared at each other. Shou’s eyes were wide, a little lost. And Ritsu finally realized—it was real. Not a dream. Not his imagination.
What the hell were they supposed to do now? He had no clue.
Why did he do something so stupid? He had no idea what Shou was thinking, and those expressions on his face were terrifying him.
Did Shou… like him? Hate him? What?
Ritsu felt like he might pass out, even lying down on Shou’s bed.
"Uh… if you were planning to kiss me, a heads-up would’ve been nice, Ritsu. Totally caught me off guard." Shou said, still processing.
Ritsu put a hand on Shou’s face, turning his head so he wouldn’t see the blush spreading across his cheeks. Shou just laughed, trying to pull Ritsu’s hand away.
"That's it? That’s all you’re gonna say?" Ritsu asked, sounding a little annoyed, but Shou knew it was more embarrassment than anger.
"Of course not." Shou said, taking Ritsu’s hand off his face and looking at him with an expression Ritsu couldn’t name. "I didn’t expect to say this so soon, but… I like you."
Ritsu didn’t think those words would hit him so hard—but they did. He opened his eyes as wide as he could, tried to say something, and ended up just letting tears slide down his cheeks onto the bed.
Shou didn’t freak out. Instead, he ran his hands over those reddened cheeks and gently wiped the tears from the beautiful eyes that had him completely captivated.
"M-me… too…" Ritsu whispered, fighting to speak but letting himself cry.
He realized Shou wasn’t going to push him. He would just be there, wiping his tears until Ritsu could tell him properly what he really felt.
"I think it’s time to get into pajamas, don’t you?" Shou said, brushing Ritsu’s cheeks tenderly.
Ritsu let out a quiet, nasal laugh and, resting on his forearms above the bed, pressed his lips to Shou’s once again. Shou responded eagerly, matching the kiss.
It was a moment suspended in time, theirs and theirs alone. And in that fleeting silence, Ritsu couldn’t help but ask himself:
Was it truly worth risking everything for the boy who lay above him?
Only he knew the answer.