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It’s been raining for hours non-stop, and it was getting late. Detective Kate Beckett was longing for dry clothes and her comfortable bed. It had been just her luck that she was outside when the rain started so suddenly that no one could have seen it coming. The man she and Castle had questioned was just as dripping wet, but he was just outside his apartment block where Beckett and Castle had intercepted him, just as he left his home. A few words into the conversation, and Beckett was fairly certain that he wasn’t a potential suspect. But she wanted to check his alibi anyway, just because he was too arrogant for his own good. They just had said their good-byes, when, without a warning, the rain started pouring down on them. Not just a few drops first, but full-on cloudburst.
It had also been just her luck that she forgot to bring new change of clothes into the precinct when she had used the last one. So now she sat there since hours slightly shivering, answering with a sharp “I’m fine” when someone dared asking if she needed anything, although she was very clearly not fine. But her pride would never let it happen that she, Detective Kate Beckett, admitted to anyone she was cold. Not even Castle. Especially not Castle. That would only mean a smug grin on his face, because “I told you so”, as he suggested to stop by her place when they finally reached their car, and were completely drenched, but “We don’t have time for that, Castle”. And seeing that smug grin would mean for her to fight with all her willpower to not give in and wipe it from his face with a kiss that waited far too long.
“You know, staring out the window doesn't make the rain stop.”
She hadn’t even noticed she was staring out the window, but now that Castle’s voice snaped her out of her trance, she spun around. “It doesn’t? I thought you of all people would believe it would.”
“No, staring alone doesn't make it stop. It needs some more. You need to really concentrate on wanting it to stop. And I believe there is a small spell you need to mumble over and over again. But unfortunately, I can’t remember it. It’s been years, if not decades, since I last wanted the rain to stop.”
Beckett tilted her head. “You don’t want the rain to stop? Why?”
Castle settled on the edge of her desk, closer to her than necessary, and leaning in even closer. “Don’t you love the sound of rain, whipping against the window, making that wonderful sound that just screams ‘Fall’? The feeling of being warm inside while everything outside is wet and cold and this contrast between comfortable and uncomfortable. And looking outside the window and seeing the wet streets and all the lights reflecting? Don’t you love that?”
During his small monologue he had got up again and was walking around her. She found herself turning her chair turning wherever he went. There was a reason why she loved his novels so much, he did have a talent for language and words. That didn’t mean she had to agree with what he said.
“Well said, Castle. But it is not fall yet, it’s September. And it is eight o'clock, so it’s not dark, so there are no lights and no reflection-”
“But there will be, when it keeps raining!”
“-and I am feeling anything but warm. And before you say anything, I thought I had a change of clothes here.”
“I wasn’t going to say anything.”
They fell silent. Beckett tried to concentrate on her paperwork some more, but she didn’t stop shivering. She really tried to stop but it just got worse with every passing minute. “I’m going to be so sick tomorrow,” she muttered softly to herself, but apparently it was not soft enough, because Castle got up from his designated chair.
“Okay, I can’t watch this anymore. Come here.” She looked up to him, frowning when she saw him with his arms wide open. “What!? No!”
“Oh, come on, there’s nothing to it! Just a friend trying to stop you from being unreasonable.”
Beckett knew herself well enough to know that once she let Castle hug her like that, she’d be gone. She wouldn’t want to let go ever again and that would be a problem. She already saw herself thinking of excuses just to hug him again, and before she knew it, she seized the opportunity she was currently given. She melted into the hug, pushing thinking about the consequences away for later, and just let the warmth of his body slowly reach hers. A few minutes passed, and she found herself shivering much less and feeling much more comfortable. She was right. She didn’t want to let go. Ever again. But her legs began to feel numb, and they were still cold, and it was still not ideal. “Castle,” she said, with a much smaller voice than intended, and for some reason he knew exactly what she was trying to say. Slowly, he opened his arms again, so that the cold of the bullpen didn’t rush up on her all at once.
“Why, I mean, why aren’t you going home? You’re shift is over, isn’t it?”
“Yes, it is, but Walker from the B-shift needs to keep my car here, for whatever reason. I’ll need to get a cab. And how many cabs do you think are free with this rain going on?”
“My guess would be not many.”
“Exactly. That’s why I’m waiting. Which raises the question why you haven’t left yet.”
“I’m kind of expecting a murder anytime soon. You must admit this is the perfect weather for an alley-murder, classic black-and-white movie style, men in dark raincoats and hats, pulled deep into their faces, collar up. One well-aimed shot, which, from the sound of it, might as well be a tree nearby that couldn’t stand the constant weight of the rain drops anymore and dropped a big branch. Quick and dirty, nobody would notice it, and they’d be gone. Which would leave us to discover the vic’s dark past that he was trying to escape.”
“You’re right, perfect weather for a murder. In a story! You should write it into your next book.”
“You sound like my ex-wife,” Castle pouted.
“Which one?”
“Gina. She keeps getting on my nerves about the next Nikki Heat novel. Another reason why I’m still here. Thinking of a story is so much more fun than actually writing it!”
“Oh, Castle. It must be so hard being you. But you wouldn’t be called to the crime scene anyway. It’s Walker’s shift and he doesn't like you. So go and enjoy your privilege of having a car.”
Castle seemed to agree with her logic about Walker’s dislike of him because he got up. He was about halfway through putting his jacket on when he paused and frowned. “You know, I could take you with me and drop you off.”
“But that’s the other direction than your place. That way doesn’t make sense for you to drive.”
“It will make sense if it means that you’ll be home in warm and dry clothes. Come on.” He put the rest of his jacket on, went then over to her chair, took her jacket – which definitely should have dried someplace else – from the back of her chair and helped her in.
The department was mostly empty when they left. Some colleagues from the B-shift sat at their desks to work through paperwork, but neither Beckett nor Castle were close enough with them to even say goodbye. So, they silently left for the elevator, being too tired and cold after a longer day than planned, even if they had much longer, this one was different. A different kind of exhausting. They reached the park deck, found his car – it was pretty obvious which was his – and while Castle searched for something in the trunk, Beckett got in on the passenger seat. A moment later, Castle appeared next to her on the driver’s seat, handing her something over.
“Here, take this,” he simply said.
Without asking, she did what he told her to. So far has she come. Two, maybe even one year ago, she would have suspected it to be some kind of trick that she should be aware of, being a cop. But over the past couple of months, she found herself trusting him more and more, even if she didn’t always want to admit it. Almost always, there was no reason to regret trusting him – this time was no exception.
“Take your jacket off and put it around your shoulders,” he suggested when she held the blanket a bit awkwardly. She did as she was told.
“Why do you keep a blanket?”
“Old habits. I used to always have one for Alexis when she fell asleep on our way back from the Hamptons. I guess I just never wanted to let go of that. And that’s a good thing. Now you have a blanket.”
“Yes, that’s a good thing,” she repeated, smiling at him.
“Let’s get you home.”
That was easier said than done. The rain caused more people being out and about by car rather than taking the subway, which in turn caused the streets to be flooded – in more ways than one. The cars moved forward only as slowly as one would be by foot, moving a few feet and then stopping again. Castle had turned on the radio, too quiet to actually understand anything over the rain, but loud enough to notice there is some other noise. Beckett had her head put against the window; Castle couldn’t tell if she was asleep or not. He was just about to ask, when she sat up again suddenly, focusing on the radio. “How do you turn this louder?”
Instead of answering, he just turned the knob and the voice of the radio speaker filled the car. “We received information about the traffic situation in downtown Manhattan. As expected, the rain causes major restrictions on the streets. Parts of streets are not accessible anymore due to flooding. We would like to ask everyone to stay home if possible.”
“You think we’d be out here if we had a choice!?” Beckett asks rhetorically.
“Furthermore, if you are currently in downtown Manhattan, you will be there longer. The police are currently trying to set up redirections to avoid the flooded areas, but that will take some more time. Please be patient. We will keep you updated, so stay tuned.” And with that the voice of the radio speaker disappeared, and some song began to play. Castle turned the volume down again.
“Well, this is not helping your upcoming cold,” Castle sighed. “I wish I could offer you something else.”
Beckett smiled weakly. “It’s fine, really. This blanket is already so much better than my jacket.”
They now stood on the same spot for at least five minutes. “I might as well turn the engine off.” He was now glad he didn’t choose to show off this morning by driving one of his sportier cars but picked his ‘normal’ car. The others are built much lower and would be so much more affected by the rain.
“I’m sorry,” he heard her voice. The way it sounded was so not-Beckett-like that he turned carefully.
“You have nothing to be sorry for.”
“I shouldn't have pressured you to go home. You were fine at the precinct. We were fine. We didn’t bother anyone just waiting there till the rain stops. But now you’re stuck here with me.”
Castle frowned. “That doesn’t sound like the Kate Beckett I know.”
“I hate being an inconvenience,” she finally admitted after another minute of silence, looking down.
“Kate, you could never be an inconvenience! Never. Where is this coming from? I should be the one apologizing. After all, I’m the one following you around for years now even though you hate it and I know it.”
“I don’t hate it.”
“You what?”
“I don’t hate you following me. At least not anymore. I used to hate it, to despise it. But you grew on me. In fact, I now enjoy it. Spending time with you. Solving cases. Listening to your crazy theories. Pretending to be annoyed at you.”
“You just pretend?”
“Yes, Castle, I pretend. How could I seriously be annoyed or mad when you look at me with that face?”
“What face?”
“Your face.”
“What’s wrong with my face?”
“Did you even listen what I said? Nothing’s wrong with it.”
“What’s then with it?”
Beckett sighed frustrated. She really had to spell it out for him. “You are a nine-year-old in more ways than just on a sugar rush.” She smiled fondly at that memory – back when she meant it as an insult, as an argument to get him away from her investigations, all those years ago, not knowing what was yet to come. “You look like a child when you explain something to me or Ryan or Espo. When you frown when something doesn’t make sense. When you’re really enthusiastic about something. I could never really be mad at that face and the person it belongs to.”
“Why, Detective Beckett, did you just give me a compliment?”
“Don’t make me regret it.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it.”
Raindrops drumming on the windshield was the only sound for a while.
“You know, we’ve been stuck in many situations together and I believe this is the least dangerous one so far.”
“You’re right, it could be so much worse.”
“Yes, we could be stuck in a freezer.”
“Or at the bottom of a river in a car.”
“Or hand-cuffed in a room with a tiger.”
“We could probably go on.”
“All things considered, this is a nice place to be stuck in. Compared to others.”
“I’m still cold though. So, it could be nicer. But I’m not complaining.”
“The heater is already on max.”
“I’m so thankful for cars in which the heater still works with the engine turned off.”
The voice of the radio speaker became audible again. “We just received information that there has been an accident at Avenue B and seventh Street. Due to the high traffic volume, people who are currently in that area are asked to keep their positions and not try to get out of it. The less vehicles are moving the less accidents can happen and the faster you are wherever you want to go. We thank you for your patience and cooperation.”
Castle and Beckett just looked at each other. “There is no way we could say we are not currently in that area,” Castle stated, although that was hardly necessary. If their sense of orientation was even slightly correct – they had a hard time seeing anything going on outside – they were one block away. It was also not helping their situation. Beckett felt the cold of her clothes creeping up on her again and despite the heat being on maximum power she was shivering. She tried to find anything in her brain that could help her, but she was completely out of ideas.
Apparently, that was not the case for Castle. “How about you put on my jacket. Then you can take your pants off and cover your legs with the blanket.” Great. That was not the kind of idea she was hoping for. Stripping in front of Castle hadn’t been the first thing on her mind, but now that he mentioned it, she was certain the thought wouldn’t leave her so soon. But Castle seemed to misinterpret her staring at him, because he added, “I’ll close my eyes and cover them, if you insist.”
How could she convey that she didn’t care? Didn’t care about her wet clothes, her shivering, her going to be sick the next day. In that moment she only cared about having a reason to look him in the eyes and getting lost in them. She didn't care that it wasn’t really a reason. She tried to convey a message, a message that she was still too scared to speak out aloud. That she thought he was kind of cute. That she wanted to be more than friends. And so much more. She knew she was staring. If Castle noticed, he didn’t say anything. Or he didn’t mind or care. Neither wanted the moment to end. Except for the radio speaker.
“The accident at Avenue B and seventh street has been dissolved and the traffic should go on again any moment–”
“Seems like I’ll get my own dry clothes soon,” she said with a smile, which she hoped didn’t look too disappointed, which in turn would probably evoke questions. Just because she was disappointed to leave his car soon, didn’t mean her face needed to mirror that. Apparently, her acting skills were not too bad, as he simply smiled back and nodded, “Seems so.”
And really, not much later they started moving again and shortly after they arrived at Beckett's place.
“Well, here we are.”
“Thank you so much for taking me. Hope you’ll get home quicker.” Beckett unbuckled her seatbelt. Turned to him to say goodbye. And she made the mistake again. The mistake of looking at him, just to see the way he was already looking at her. Their eyes met and for her it felt like falling into his embrace from earlier again. Warm and comfortable. Safe. Loving.
“I would love to kiss you right now,” she heard herself saying. It was over her lips before she could stop herself and she is left with staring at him in horror. “I didn’t mean to say that out loud.”
Instead of answering, Castle unbuckled his seatbelt too, leaned over to her, put one hand against the side of her seat, placed the other carefully against her cheek, and kissed her in the gentlest way she could imagine. Her eyes fluttered shut as she reacted and kissed him just as gentle back. In that moment she knew she would never want to kiss anyone else ever again. If it were up to her, this would be their last first kiss.
They were about to deepen the kiss when she pulled away. The look of pain, fear, and love on his face was so overwhelming she wanted to go right back to kissing him.
“This isn’t the right place,” she said breathlessly.
“Right,” he replied, looking around as if he just realized they were still in his car in a no-parking zone. “But where is?” He didn’t need to ask the rest of his question; it was written all over his face.
“Look for a parking spot, then come upstairs. I’ll be waiting.” And with another short kiss she let herself out in the rain. All of a sudden, the rain was not as inconvenient or uncomfortable as before. It made her happy and she was thankful for it. Without it, the car ride wouldn’t have happened, her thoughts, that were supposed to stay in her head, wouldn’t have slipped past her lips, and she would spend an indefinite amount of time pondering about her feelings for him and his for her. But now everything was so clear for her, she knew for certain what she felt and for that she just followed her instincts – she laid her head back and laughed in the face of the dark clouds and the rain that fell on her face. When she reached her door, she was anew completely soaked. Inside her apartment she put new dry clothes on, not caring what it was as she suspected – and hoped – that she wouldn’t wear them for long anyway. She just finished clearing the way from the front door to her bedroom a bit more, when she heard a knock on the door and an involuntary smile formed on her face.