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This was undoubtedly the worst plan Lance has ever had, and he has had some rough moments. Especially lately. Shiro is gone, everyone is upset or worried. Hunk is stress-baking a new combination of dessert every other day, his latest creation is something he likes to call ‘The Apple Pie- Brownie Bite Delights.’ which was ironically one of the most undelightful things a person could ever taste. Allura and Coran were hesitant to try it, and after watching everyone's face green, they didn't feel like they were missing out on too much, Pidge was the only person who wasn't acting abnormally. Space tech blah blah blah … Matt and her dad blah blah blah … More space tech … whatever. Allura and Coran were silently stressing out over Shiro's disappearance. Coran was shunned to the basement due to a part two of the case of the slipperies yet again. And Allura spent her time hiding out in her room with her father’s hologram keeping her company. While he is no longer a living, breathing being, he was definitely getting exhausted listening to her daily rants about the team falling apart. But it’s better for a piece of technology to hear her team complaints than the team she is complaining about. Allura and Coran were supposed to be the responsible ones. They knew Altea and Zarkon, and they know the Castleship. It felt debilitating to not know exactly what to do anymore, almost like they were stripped of a power they had always had. And then there’s Keith. Unfortunately for Lance, Keith had been especially angsty lately. And Lance being the ‘new leader’ and all, it was really getting to him. Or at least that was everyone's best guess. Shiro wanted Keith to lead if something ever happened to him. So why did the Black Lion only react to Lance’s presence? Keith didn’t leave his room except for missions and group meetings, and when he did he looked like a total wreck. Tangled, unkempt, overgrown hair, bags under his eyes, his paladin armor barely latched together. Allura begged Lance to confront him on his unprofessionalism and lack of team spirit. Lance always replies with “I’ll get to it.” yet he never does. He chickens out over it, very unleaderly.
But anyways, back to this /horrible/ plan he has going on. They were head to head with at least 100 Galran fighter ships firing non-stop at the Lions and the Castleship. The mission was supposed to be just defending a planet but now it was a full battle, not what any of them expected. Lance was sweating in his seat at the sudden pressure. He hasn't had to make last minute decisions like this yet.
/Shiro would know what to do, Shiro would know what to do, Shiro would know what to do/. The words ran through Lance’s head, he had tried to find ways to switch up his thinking when the anxiety of it all got to him like this. /what would Shiro do? What would Shiro do?/
“We need to form Voltron!” He yelled out. Very leaderly
“What!” Pidge yelped, unexpecting.
“We haven’t done that without Shiro yet!” Hunk exclaimed, three fighter jets were on his tail.
“I haven’t done it… ever!” Allura cried out, her experience with the Blue lion was weak. And forming Voltron? That was a pretty big task for a new pilot.
“We can’t just keep firing, we are bound to run out of ammo and they just keep coming! We haven’t made any progress with this!” Lance pushed. He noticed Keith stayed quiet.
“C’mon guys, you all know what to do. Act like this is just a regular, everyday, normal Voltron formation.” Lance sighed, calming himself down. When everyone else got riled up, it worried him even more.
“Allura, focus on the bond with your lion. You could even go as far as imaging Voltron being formed.” Pidge instructed.
“Alright.” Allura bit her lip and focused, scrunching her brows and settling her breathing.
“Ready?” Lance said as they began to form the V-shape to prepare for the transition.
“Yeah!” Everyone shouted… well almost everyone.
It took about ten seconds for the paladins to realise this was absolutely not going to work. It was frustrating and Lance had to come up with /another/ plan. And fast.
“Erggg, fall out!” Lance growled, obviously very annoyed. He knew exactly why it hadn’t worked. He knew what the issue was. He knew /who/ the problem was.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
In the end, they worm-holed out of the attack, their coordinates not set for anywhere specific, they needed to regroup.
“Everyone meet for a team meeting, now!” Lance had his ‘i mean business’ voice on.
They all slumped onto the big curved sectional in the lounge. Pidge was criss-crossed, attentive, Lance pictured her as a little dog with perked ears and a wagging tail. She was his biggest cheerleader. From the beginning she had been excited for him to have the role of team leader. Every step he took was a reason to be proud of him. Hunk’s posture was truly terrible but ignorable enough for Lance to get through his vent without mentioning how he would surely have a hunchback by the time he reached 35. Maybe 30 at this rate. Allura, on the other hand, had perfect posture and looked like she had just appeared in a shampoo commercial. Her skin was radiant, her hands clasped in her lap, her eyes hopeful. Keith was- wait
“Where is Keith?” Lance asked, looking around the room just in case he had missed him.
No one answered, a few looked to their feet.
Lance was getting fed up, he snapped his fingers at his three person audience.
“Uh, hello?? Where. Is. Keith?” His eyes were big and frustrated.
“I think he went to his room…” Pidge scratched at the back of her head.
“He needs to be here. In fact, he needs to be here more than any of you do.” Lance tapped at his chin, rethinking.
“You know what?” Lance giggled. Not in a funny way. He giggled in a ‘i am on my last straw’ type of giggle. “You can disperse, I’m going to find Keith and give him a piece of my mind.”
Then he stormed out without another word. Leaving the paladins to do whatever they do please. What they truly wanted to do was wait for Lance to enter Keith’s room then press their ears against the door to hear Lance finally get his anger out.
They got a snack instead. Something pre-made. None of that brownie apple crap.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Rapid knocking came from the outside of Keith's metal door. He groaned as if he knew what was exactly about to happen. He replayed how he had imagined this conversation to go after everytime he had fucked up. Which had been a lot in the past months.
“Come in.” he said flatly.
Lance did just that, he stomped in and shut the door behind him, taking in a deep breath in preparation to let out his pent of aggression
“Keith,” he began surprising calm, “what… the FUCK is wrong with you?!” oh-nevermind not very calm.
“Whoa, dude-” Keith stood up to defend himself
“Sit down! This is a big deal for me, actually. You keep skipping out, slacking off, and being so fucking annoying honestly and its driving me insane. I know you and Shiro were close and you have the right to be pissed off that he’s gone… bad wording, temporarily retired. And I didn’t even really /want/ to be team leader and black paladin but that's just sort of what happened. There is nothing either of us can do about it now. So can you be mature for /once/, pull yourself together and not be a total dick to me and the rest of the people here. You also need to take a shower and cut your hair or something. At least dress the part of a defender of the universe.” Lance was out of breath and goddammit it felt good to say that.
Keith bit the inside of his cheek, he wasn’t about to take this shit from his ex-rival, “first of all, you are in no way, shape, or form the /black paladin/. You are the /blue/ paladin who for some reason pilots the black /lion/. Shiro is, and will always be the black paladin.” another deep breath, “secondly, yeah, okay, maybe I /did/ want to be the black lions pilot, proving that I didn’t have to just endure everything for no reason. Third-”
“Hold on,” Lance cut him off, “what all did you ‘endure’ exactly?” Lance mocked him by using air quotes.
“Being nothing but a dropout to the best program to exist like basically ever in this day and age. I worked really fucking hard, Lance, even on earth before all of this. You never would've even been able to fly or /find/ blue without my guidance and research. Also, call me whatever you want, but I’m Shiro's brother. Am I the only one who feels like that counts for /something/?” Keith looked sympathetic and downright pitiful. They were both being vulnerable here and Lance couldn’t help but feel like he had stripped Keith of an opportunity he had waited for since… forever.
“Well… what the hell do you want to do now? It seems like from my perspective, I don’t want to lead Voltron and be the Black Lions pilot. And you /do/ want to lead and pilot the black lion? Is that right?” Lance laid out all the facts
“...yes.” Keith wasn’t exactly sure where Lance was going with all of this.
“Then it's settled. You're the team leader now. Have fun I guess.” Lance did that cocky, taunting smile of his that ticked Keith off. He did it on purpose most of the time.
“Wh-what? That’s not how it works! The black lion chose you.” Keith sputtered.
“Do you not trust its choice? The same judgement it had when it chose shiro? If I'm not as eligible to lead then why do you think it would hold me and Shiro to the same degree?” He was really getting under Keith’s skin now.
And Keith… honestly didn’t even know what to say. He was at a fork in the road figuratively. The left path; say “no, the lion doesn’t have good judgement.” therefore saying that Shiro wasn’t the right person to lead Voltron in the first place. Then there is the right path; to say “yes, the lion was correct to choose Lance as leader and pilot.” There was no winning. Each path went to the same location; Lance was right. And damn, it really stung to admit that to himself.
“Fine. I’m just angry and taking it out on everything. I’m not sure where you guys want me to put it though.” Keith sighed.
“Put what?”
“My emotions?”
“You can express them through words rather than the painful silence. Have you ever thought of that?” Lance scoffed.
“No one wants to hear my dirty laundry, Lance.” Keith scoffed back. It was a stupid idea of Lance’s.
“If it stops you from prohibiting us from forming Voltron, then I will listen to you rant about your problems anytime.” Lance also meant it. It wasn't just an excuse to get the team working better. He cared about Keith more than most people knew. He loathed thinking about Keith feeling like he didn’t have any allies on the team to talk to.
“S-seriously?” Keith stuttered with genuine confusion and… admiration?
“Yes dude, you mean a shit ton to me. I don’t want you to be hurting without having help. This is the same thing as if you were bleeding out on the ground and no one even offered you a band-aid. But you have me, your neosporin in a sea of unhelpful antibiotics!”
Keith chuckled at the analogy, it was a refreshing expression to see.
“That’s the first time I’ve seen you laugh in months.” Lance blushed
“Thanks, Lance. Fuck, I hate being vulnerable like this. But it’s good to know you care about me.” Keith hid his face
“Well, it appears Mr. Kogane /does/ in fact have feelings!” Lance gasped teasingly, receiving a light shoulder punch.
“Do I need to apologize to everyone else? Are they all pissed at me too?” Keith sighed
“Eh, I’ll let you off the hook this time. I think they were mostly mad at me.” Lance shrugged.
“Lance?” Keith said softly after a few seconds of silence between the two. He wasn’t exactly sure why Lance hadn’t left his room… but he wasn’t upset about his company.
“Hm?” Lance perked up
“Do… Do you think Shiro is gonna come back?” Keith sounded so meek like a stray cat. His eyes were big like one too. Of course his version of ‘meek’ was merely just not his usual suave nonchalant way. But this felt like an actual question. He didn’t want Lance to lie to him.
“I don’t know. But if he does things will go back to normal. I’ll get Blue back, He’ll return to his leader role, and Allura will retire from being a pilot of the lions. At least we know we have a backup if we need her now.” Lance smiled weakly. He didn’t want to lie to Keith either. But just saying “no, I really really don’t” would be a bad idea.
“But Allura /loves/ being a pilot. You can see it on her face every time she does a little loop with Blue or turns abruptly. It's like second nature to her.” Keith just about whispered. “Everything is so confusing now. Things are changing.”
“Things /are/ changing, it doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing though.” Lance sat next to Keith on his bed. It was more comfortable than his which kind of pissed him off.
“Like what? What good things are changing?” Keith wanted a real answer. No sugarcoat, no gaslighting.
“We are getting along better.” Lance didn’t hesitate, he didn’t really think either. But potato-potata.
“We?” Keith raised a brow
“Y-you and me? We aren’t yelling at each other, we are talking about feelings, we are sympathizing!” Lance pointed out.
“All of those changes have happened in the past ten minutes.” Keith laughed softly. It was sort of cute how he did that when he was nervous- wait. Why was he nervous now? When they were talking about their friendship?
“Well yeah but, they don’t really feel like they will relapse back to kicking and scratching. Do they?”
Keith shook his head
“In fact, actually…. Things between us can only go up from here.” /things between us/. The wording was purposeful but bold. He halfway wanted Keith to catch on. But it was vague enough he could play it off.
“Yeah, they might.” Keith smiled softly.
“Might?” Lance gulped, the words barely made any noise suffocated from the silence in the room. Keith had removed all the white noise machines the second he moved in. It was just them with the quiet. Which was technically just them.
“Might.” Keith repeated. His eye contact shifted down Lance’s face near his mouth. He could just play it off later by saying he had apple brownie on his lips.
“Keith.”
“Lance?” Keith whispered back, eyes not moving. So when the lips slowly came forward farther he was prepared to lock his with them.
The apple brownie taste in Lance’s mouth didn’t bother him much. He was more focused on how Lance’s lips were on his, Lance’s hands were holding his, Lance Lance Lance Lance Lance Lance Lance Lance Lance Lance Lance Lance Lance.
But also from the other point of view
Keith Keith Keith Keith Keith Keith Keith Keith Keith Keith Keith Keith Keith. Keith’s pink lips Keith’s soft hands. He had been so worried to even look at Keith for more than two seconds and now he was fucking kissing him. What sort of dream was this?
The kiss wasn’t anything spicy, it wasn’t seductive or sexy or anything like that. It felt like worlds colliding. Keith’s fucked up world where he was orphaned and a loser then a dropout and just a grown up angsty teen. Lance’s world where he lived with his huge bilingual family in his upper-middle class house and attended a prestigious space school and had a crush on every tall blonde he saw.
Suddenly they were blurred lines. Keith was a short guy with black hair and Lance had enough family to share. They fit like missing pieces from different puzzles that somehow, someway fit together.
So what if Shiro came back and shifted normalcy?
What about being some space-saviours against a purple evil alien was “normal” anyways?