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Hyunsung is used to it.
12:37 pm
— Kiyoung, how are you?
He knows Kiyoung is often busy.
1:48 pm
— How's work, Kiyoung? You're taking breaks right?
He doesn't really mind being left on read.
3:05 pm
— I saw a new Chanelia Hermes bag. I’ll buy it for your collection.
At least Kiyoung sees it, right?
3:36 pm
— I bought it. Should I go there?
He feels guilty that he's not doing much despite being the guildmaster. But because Kiyoung manages everything so well, he doesn't find the need to interfere, in the case of hindering Kiyoung even more. Sometimes, he thinks that… maybe he's bothering Kiyoung by pestering him with messages. Considering that, most of the messages in their chat are from him.
Hyunsung leans back and lets out a sigh. While he understands that Kiyoung isn't always available to talk, he's not been responding for hours on end lately, which was starting to frustrate Hyunsung for a bit. He closes his eyes and tries not to overthink. He shouldn't overthink. Maybe Kiyoung is simply preoccupied with work or other responsibilities.
Roughly an hour later, he finally receives a message. As soon as his phone vibrated, he whipped it up at an incredible speed.
4:26 pm
— Ah.. sorry for the late reply, Hyunsung. I was busy. How about we have dinner together later?
Hyunsung's eyes lit up as he read the message.
4:26 pm
— Really? I’ll book us a reservation right away!
He stared at his phone, heart racing as he waited for Kiyoung's reply. Kiyoung didn't reply immediately like he did, and it felt like each second stretched on for hours.
4:29 pm
— Thank you, Hyunsung. Let's meet at the guild entrance at 6:30 pm.
Hyunsung's reply was immediate.
4:29 pm
— Okay! See you.
Hyunsung pauses for a moment and takes a deep breath while staring at the screen. The thought of going to dinner with Kiyoung had his stomach turning in knots. Technically, it can be considered as a date, right? He quickly shakes his head, scolding himself for thinking such thoughts. He is simply going to a simple dinner with his best friend. That's it.
Nevertheless, Hyunsung browses his wardrobe for a suitable outfit to wear. Most of his clothes had been picked by Kiyoung personally, something about.. looking presentable as the guildmaster. Hyunsung doesn't mind. He actually likes it.
He ran his fingers through the soft, well-tailored clothes. He pulled one out— a deep blue coat. Simple, but elegant. He holds it up against himself in the mirror and judges whether it's good enough.
“... This one?” He mutters to himself.
He wonders if Kiyoung would like this outfit.. maybe he can receive a compliment or two. Hyunsung's ears turned a little red at the thought. He slips on the coat, adjusting the collar until it feels right. After that, he takes one last look in the mirror, combing through his hair with a deep breath. He leaned in, his fingers carding through his hair till he felt like it was good enough.
He felt his heart race. He tries to not think so much about this ‘date’, but he couldn't. Even when he knows it's nothing special, that it was just another dinner spent together with Kiyoung, he can't help himself. He quietly places a hand over his chest, both feeling and hearing how loud his heart thumps. He sighs again.
“It's just dinner.” He repeats to himself before walking out the door.
Hyunsung took a walk around the guild house since he finished too early, at around 5:10 pm. He greets the guild members that crossed his path, even stopping by the training grounds to watch them train. He couldn't participate of course— it would ruin his outfit.
After killing some time there, he went to the entrance. The time was 6:10 pm. He can wait for 20 minutes. He knows Kiyoung won't be late, he’s a punctual man.
Minutes pass by. Each tick felt like an hour long. Hyunsung fiddled with the ends of his coat to pass by the time, but he also constantly checks on his watch, feeling a bit nervous. Just a little nervous.
Eventually though, at 6:30 pm, he sees Kiyoung walking up to him.
“You're here Hyunsung.” Kiyoung gives him a smile, which he in turn, also smiled. “You look good.”
His heart pounds against his chest as it always did whenever Kiyoung compliments him. Hyunsung quickly averts his eyes, trying to gain composure so he won't look like a flustered idiot in front of Kiyoung.
“Thank you.” He manages eventually, clearing his throat and complimenting Kiyoung back. “You look really nice as well, Kiyoung.”
It earned him a quiet chuckle from Kiyoung. “Shall we go?” Hyunsung nods to the carriage prepared in front of them.
“Sure.” Kiyoung replies with a content smile.
“There's a new restaurant that opened. I heard many good things about it, and I had a feeling you’ll like it so I booked a reservation there.” Hyunsung smooths out his coat and hopes he sounded casual.
“Haha. Ever so thoughtful, aren't you Hyunsung?” Kiyoung lightly laughs. Hyunsung's ears flushed faintly. “That’s…”
“Nevermind that.” Kiyoung waves a hand dismissively. “Anyway, how's your day been? I feel like I’m always on the receiving end, so I thought of asking you.”
“It was…” He hesitated, briefly looking down.
Boring.
Dull.
Lonely.
“Fine.” He looks back up, a small smile on his face.. “Nothing major to note of.”
Kiyoung nods, “I see. Also.. I’m sorry if I haven't been replying as usual lately. I was busy. But I did see your messages.” Kiyoung smiles apologetically.
Hyunsung waves it off, “It’s fine… You don't have to reply to every message.” He replies in a casual way, not wanting Kiyoung to see how it bothers him.
But even then, Kiyoung sees through him. “You can tell me if it bothers you, you know? You're not very good at hiding it, Hyunsung-ah.” He chuckles at the end.
Hyunsung stiffens, cheeks flushing slightly.
“Is that a good thing or… a bad thing?”
Kiyoung sighs before smiling.
“If you want, I can keep the bond activated.”
Hyunsung's eyes widened. Normally, they kept the bond off to respect each other's privacy, but now…
“I…”
Hyunsung hesitates. It's unlike him, who wants every chance to have the bond activated whenever he can, but he can't help but think if it would be a good idea right now, given his situation. The bond works both ways. If Kiyoung activates it, his feelings would be open for Kiyoung to feel. This worried Hyunsung. He has no doubt that Kiyoung cares for him… Just not in the way he wanted.
If Kiyoung finds out the true depths of his affections, it might ruin everything. Though he really wants to activate the bond, the fear of rejection and abandonment overwhelmed that feeling by a large margin.
Hyunsung takes a deep breath, and speaks up again, his voice a bit shaky, though he hopes Kiyoung won't notice.
“... It's fine.” He forces a smile. “You don't have to activate it simply for my sake.”
This earned a strange reaction from Kiyoung, who was understandably puzzled. “... Eh..? I mean, sure, but why?”
Hyunsung quickly racked his brain to find a convincing explanation. “Well.. I just… You’ve been so busy lately… and I know the bond can be distracting…” He forces his voice to sound apologetic, “I don't want to be a burden to Kiyoung…”
Kiyoung didn't look like he believed Hyunsung one bit, “I see… Alright then..”
Hyunsung winces inwardly at the skepticism. He could tell Kiyoung didn't buy his excuse, but what else was he supposed to say? He couldn't just blurt out, 'Hey, I'm in love with you. Can you keep the bond closed so you don't find out?’
No, definitely not.
After a while, the carriage stopped in front of the restaurant. Hyunsung got off first, before offering his hand to Kiyoung to help him down. Kiyoung lightly placed his hand on top of Hyunsung's palm as he got down, letting go directly afterwards.
Hyunsung couldn't help but savour the fleeting touch, even when it ended far too quickly for his liking.
The pair walked towards the restaurant as the eyes of the public stared at them, but Hyunsung only had his eyes trained on Kiyoung. He quickly went to a waiter and asked, “Hello, I made a reservation under Kim Hyunsung?”
The waiter looks flustered, not expecting it to actually be the real Kim Hyunsung and not some poser. The waiter led them to the third floor, on a secluded balcony where they can enjoy a more quiet and private dinner.
He pulled out a chair for Kiyoung before taking his own seat. He picked up the menu, but he found it hard to focus on reading the items. He looked up at Kiyoung, noting every little detail he could see. The way Kiyoung's hair framed his face, the soft curve of his lips as he smiled politely at the staff, the way his hands looked elegantly delicate as he perused the menu…
“Have you chosen anything yet, Hyunsung?” Kiyoung asks, not looking up and continuing to look at the menu.
Hyunsung snaps out of his reverie and averted his eyes back to the menu, feeling embarrassed.
“N-Not yet…” He stammers, trying to channel his focus on the dishes written on the menu, but the letters seem to mesh and blur together, the words refusing to make any sense. His mind was too preoccupied thinking about the person sitting across from him.
He quickly takes deep breaths, trying to clear his mind. “... How about you? Found anything you like?”
“Hm… I’ll have Mirror Salmon. It looks like they did something new here.” Kiyoung places down his menu and points at what he's referring to.
“That sounds good. I’ll have that as well.” Hyunsung closes his own menu, glad to have something to focus on other than his messy emotions. “And maybe some beer if they have it.” He jokes.
Kiyoung stares at him blankly. This causes Hyunsung to clear his throat and look in the other direction out of embarrassment. He hurriedly signals a waiter.
“We’ll have two Mirror Salmons for the main dish, grape wine for the drink.. and some side dishes for appetizers.” The waiter writes the order down before bowing politely and walking away.
Once the waiter was gone, Hyunsung rubs the back of his neck awkwardly, still avoiding Kiyoung's gaze. He feels like he's making a fool of himself in front of Kiyoung. But then he hears him chuckle. Hyunsung looked at Kiyoung who was laughing. His heart does a little somersault at the sight, the sound of Kiyoung's laughter was like a melody.. so warm, so genuine, so beautiful….
“I truly can't fathom how you keep making such… jokes, Hyunsung-ah.” Kiyoung laughs in amusement. “But I guess that's just a part of you.”
Hyunsung internally shudders when he sees those fondness in Kiyoung's eyes. He felt himself falling harder and harder for Kiyoung with every moment they spent together. But as much as he longed to confess, he held back.
“Yeah... that's me, I guess..” He scratches his cheek sheepishly.
“Hm? You look quite feverish Hyunsung.” Kiyoung raises a brow. This made Hyunsung's face turn redder.
“T-That..” Hyunsung's eyes spiral trying to look for an explanation. Thus, he blurts out the first thing that comes to his mind.
“Maybe.. maybe it's the um.. seasonal allergies..?”
“... Seasonal.. allergies..?”
Kiyoung repeats. Allergies? Seriously? The reason was so dumb that Kiyoung became stumped at why Hyunsung said such weak reason. And Hyunsung doesn't even look sure at his own answer. If Hyunsung truly did have ‘seasonal allergies’, why didn't it act up last year? Or the year before that?
Maybe his feelings for Kiyoung had rendered his brain stupid.
“Right.. seasonal allergies..” Kiyoung just decided to fo along with it.
Hyunsung curses himself for the ridiculous reason. He could practically see Kiyoung's eyes gleam with skepticism. But what else is he supposed to say?! He can't just say ‘I'm blushing because I'm in love with you and trying to keep my feelings hidden is driving me insane.’ That would ruin everything!
“Yeah… must be the pollens..”
Hyunsung scratches his nape as he looks around, only to realize there wasn't a single flower in sight. Maybe he should just shut up.
“Right.. the pollens..” Kiyoung continues to go along with it. He simply looks at Hyunsung, who was stammering out an incoherent language he couldn't decipher. The situation itself was so embarrassing that Kiyoung couldn't help but laugh. Seeing Hyunsung bumble like an idiot amused him.
Hyunsung's face turned redder as Kiyoung laughs at him. Fortunately, the waiter arrived with their food, and Hyunsung couldn't help but thank whoever was watching over him for the timely intervention.
Kiyoung seemed momentarily distracted as he pulled out his hand mirror and took a picture of the food.
"Hyunsung let's take a picture together.”
Hyunsung raised an eyebrow at Kiyoung's request. A picture together? It was an unexpected request, but he agreed nonetheless. He picked up his chopsticks and gave Kiyoung a small smile.
"Okay, sure. Let's take a picture."
He leaned a bit closer to Kiyoung, trying to ignore the way his heart skipped a beat at their proximity. He then holds up a peace sign.
Kiyoung placed his index and thumb on Hyunsung's chin, pressing their cheeks together as he snapped a picture, capturing his angelic smile, and Hyunsung's flustered, surprised face when their cheeks pressed together. Hyunsung was stunned by the unexpected closeness of Kiyoung's touch on his cheek. He felt his heart racing as their cheeks pressed together, and he struggled to compose himself in time for the photo.
It was a miracle he even managed to give a semi-decent smile, given how flustered he was. And even so, the picture captured the redness in his cheeks and the slight widening of his eyes, betraying his inner turmoil at their proximity.
When Kiyoung reviewed the pictures, he holds back a laugh. He showed Hyunsung their picture together, and spoke.
"Hyunsung-ah, your allergy is acting up. Pfft.”
There he was, his face flushed red like a damn tomato, his eyes wide and startled as their cheeks were squished together. He looked like a flustered mess, and it was painfully obvious that it wasn't from seasonal allergies.
Hyunsung huffs and looks away, sulking.
Kiyoung sighs softly upon seeing Hyunsung sulk. He scoops up a piece of the Mirror Salmon and held it up infront of Hyunsung.
"Come on, don't sulk like that. Here, eat.”
To anyone else, it might look like a caring gesture of a friend. But to Hyunsung, who was hopelessly in love with Kiyoung, it felt like so much more. He felt his heart skip a beat as Kiyoung held the spoon up to his lips, offering him a bite of the Mirror Salmon. It was a simple gesture, but it felt intimate, like something a boyfriend would do to his girlfriend.
He opened his mouth obediently, trying to ignore the butterflies in his stomach as he ate the Mirror Salmon.
What made his heart thud louder is Kiyoung eating from the same spoon he just used to feed Hyunsung. His mind was screaming at him, his delusions going wild.
‘That was an indirect kiss, right???’
Of course, he knew it was a stupid thought. Friends sharing food like that was completely normal. It didn't mean anything, especially for two friends like them. But the thought kept repeating itself, a dangerous hope in his heart.
The so-called 'date' (to Hyunsung) went by with small conversations and occasional laughter. Though Hyunsung tried his best to act normally, to keep up the facade that they were just two friends out for a meal together, he can't stop his heart from constantly racing.
He couldn't help but steal sidelong glances at Kiyoung, admiring every little movement, every little expression. The more time he spent in Kiyoung's company, the harder it became to keep his feelings hidden away.
He found himself wishing that this night would never end.