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Xander clunked into his private chambers, absolutely exhausted from the day's events.
The day started with waking up before dawn, then training, meeting with the war council, meeting with the economic council, training, Elise asking to play Heroes and Outlaws (“Oh just for a few minutes, Big Brother! We haven't played in forever! I'll tell you what, YOU can be the outlaw this time, and I'll try to catch you!”), paying respects to his late mother's grave, paying respects to his late father's grave, training, and finally ending the day with a quick sparring match as requested by Takumi (“Sure, you've been able to beat my brother in a match, but can you beat ME? I'm the strongest!”).
All I need is a moment to rest, he thought. A minute to relax, to just put my feet up and breathe. I just need…
...A letter?
Xander had been in such a daze he had almost missed the folded piece of paper on his bed. He picked it up and held it close to his face. Folded… and scented. He caught a whiff of sage, and he knew it could only be from one person:
Ryoma.
His fiance.
The whole Hoshidan royal family had come to visit Nohr for a couple weeks in light of the new engagement. Though it was uncustomary for the entirety of a royal family to leave the capital, Yukimura assured them he had things under control, and that “a vacation was well deserved.” Kamui and Azura had royal business in Valla to attend to, and would come later for the actual wedding.
Xander couldn't help but smile as he opened the letter, which he found was quite long. The handwriting was carefully crafted; it looked as if Ryoma took his delicate time with every single letter.
He probably means to best me in penmanship, Xander laughed. He knows my handwriting is top tier.
After stripping his armor and settling in some soft small-clothes, he positioned himself in a comfy spot on his bed and read the letter.
My Xander,
I write to you hoping this letter finds you in high spirits. I realize your work has been demanding much of you as of late, as has mine. We are both on track to become rulers of our respective kingdoms, and the task, as we both know, is truly laborious and tiresome.
With that in mind, I write this letter wanting to share that burden with you. As I share my thoughts and feelings with you, so I hope you share yours with me.
The joy that I feel being with you here in Nohr is immense. Just knowing that you're within my grasp puts my soul at ease. I never understood why, in the past, my heart would race in your presence. I assumed it was anger, hatred, competitiveness, or simply my pugnacious nature. But only now, after our confession of mutual love, do I understand that my heart beats in passion and excitement.
To this day I live for the thrill of seeing you smile, of seeing you care for others, of seeing you look at me with more love than I could ever realize. Every trace of animosity I've ever had towards you has disappeared like a drop of water in a lake. I long for the days when you and I will sit side by side, hand in hand, watching our kingdoms blossom under the warm sun of unity. I know not when these days will be, but I yearn for them all the same.
With you by my side, I feel more at ease. I trust you, I respect you, but more importantly, I love you. I see love not as a feeling, but as an experience. I never truly understood what love was until you proposed to me some time ago. But now I understand: love is standing together when times are tough. Love is enjoying the very minutes spent together, even if they fly by in the blink of an eye. Love is the rapid beating of the heart at a single glance. Love is understanding, acceptance, support, unwavering loyalty, patience, passion. Love is warm like the sun, and love is deep like the ocean. Love is immeasurable. Love is beautiful.
My Xander, I love you more than I can say. Words are not enough to express how deeply I care for you. To transform my feelings into words would sap the true meaning of my affection. And so I leave you with this letter: the closest I can get to verbal expression. I pour my heart and soul into this letter, and I hope that the next time I see you, I will see a piece of me resting within you.
You and I have just under two weeks before our wedding. I trust that we can find the time to spend them together.
Yours,
Ryoma
Xander set the letter on his lap. His face felt warm. Was he blushing? No, of course not. He couldn't be. And his nose seemed a bit more runny than usual. It couldn't be that he was…? No, there was no room for tears. But he couldn't help but feel deeply touched by his fiance's letter, however sappy it was.
Xander smiled. I'm sorry, Ryoma, he thought, I haven't spent as much time with you as I would have liked. But I'll make it up to you.
He moved from his bed to his desk. Setting a piece of paper and a pen in front of him, he pooled all of his feelings from the bottom of his heart to his fingertips. It appeared that Ryoma may have been a little shy about saying these things in person. Well, so was Xander. Between these letters and the moments they were to spend together, Xander hoped Ryoma would understand his true feelings.
Xander's pen tapped the top of the blank page. How do I start it? He thought. Do I mimic his style? What else could I say?
His mind drew a blank. He put the pen down and chuckled to himself. You were right, Ryoma, he thought, words are not enough.
