Chapter Text
Lloyd loves being a ninja.
Truly, he does. It’s only been two years since his uncle brought him into the monastery, placing a gi on his shoulders and insisting he had a destiny larger than anything he could imagine. And only months have passed since he became the Ultimate Spinjitzu Master, the Golden Ninja the one who struck down the Overlord and dragged his father back from the edge of oblivion.
By all accounts, life should be perfect.
He has a roof over his head.
People who call themselves his family.
Friends who fight at his side.
He carries power no one else in Ninjago can even understand.
He tries to tell himself he’s grateful. He is. But the warmth around him never seems to sink past the surface. Everything feels so… not genuine. As if none of it truly belongs to him.
He tells himself he loves them, his father, his mother, Master Wu, the ninja who became his teammates. But a small, quiet part of him keeps whispering that love might not be mutual.
His mother didn’t hesitate to drop him at Darkley’s the moment he could walk through the gates alone.
His father chose darkness over him without a second thought.
Master Wu only stepped in when Lloyd became too troublesome to ignore.
The ninja barely noticed he existed until prophecy forced him into their lives.
He hates thinking about it, hates the idea that everyone around him is here because fate shoved them together, or because they feel guilty, or because they think they owe him something.
So when he sits at the table, pushing his chopsticks into the piece of fried fish his mother made, he wants to scream.
He feels like an anomaly.
Everyone else is loud, talking, laughing together. They fit. They know each other. They’ve shared years he wasn’t part of.
And he… doesn’t have anything to say.
He doesn’t know these people. Not really.
When Misako handed him a pair of chopsticks, so casually, he wanted to cry. She didn’t know he’d never learned how to use chopsticks. How could she? She was never bothered to teach him. At Darkley’s he was too frightened to ask anyone for help. With the ninja he was terrified they would tease him for not knowing something so simple.
It’s pathetic, in a way that hurts.
The Golden Ninja, who can split seas apart… can’t hold a pair of chopsticks without feeling like he’s an idiot. He could level mountains, summon storms, defeat the physical embodiment of evil itself, but he cannot hold two pairs of sticks.
It’s such a small thing.
A stupid, tiny detail.
And Lloyd knows — knows — that if he asked, they would stop everything to show him how to hold the chopsticks properly. They would smile, then reassure him, then probably act like it was no big deal.
But the thought makes him feel like dying.
What if they think less of him for it?
What if they look at him and see someone useless?
What if they start wondering why the supposed Golden Ninja can’t manage something any child can do?
What if he proves he doesn’t belong here at all.
What if—
“Lloyd, you haven’t touched your food. Is everything okay?” Nya asks, voice soft.
“Yeah, dude, is everything alright?” Kai adds, leaning a little closer.
“Oh- is it too salty, Lloyd? Do you want a different plate?” his mother asks, concerned.
He wants to vomit.
The moment someone says his name, the entire table freezes. Every conversation dies. Every pair of eyes turns to him like he’s the only thing in the room that matters.
He doesn’t speak to any of them enough to hold a one-on-one conversation, not really, it's the main reason he always sits at the end of the table. But he hates this even more, the attention, the way their voices shift the moment they address him, like he's a stranger.
They all look so normal. So human. Laughing, teasing, eating without thinking twice. Just people enjoying a night together.
And he’s sitting there glowing.
Literally glowing, a soft gold leaking from his skin. He can’t turn it off. His eyes shine like something that shouldn’t exist in a room filled with warm lanterns and wooden bowls and ordinary people.
He barely talks at these dinners anyway. He just sits at the edge of the table like some celestial being they politely invited to join them.
“It’s fine,” he mutters, forcing his voice steady. “I’m just… not hungry.”
Silence settles again.
Nya’s brows pinch together. Kai glances at the others, unsure.
Then, slowly, conversations resume.
Not naturally.
More like someone clicked play after pausing a video. Everything sounds a little more restrained now. As if they’re trying not to say anything that might disturb him further.
And Lloyd hates that even more.
He dips his head and nudges the fish around his plate, letting the soft gold leaking from his skin pool in the shadows under his hands. If he stays small enough, silent enough, maybe they’ll all forget he’s sitting here ruining the mood.
He shouldn’t be here
He’s dragging the entire dinner down
He should just leave
He clears his throat, barely louder than a whisper. “Excuse me"
He pushes his chair back gently, trying not to make noise, trying not to draw attention, but of course he does anyway. Of course the room quiets again.
“Lloyd?” his father says, brows lifting. “Leaving already?"
Lloyd swallows, forcing a polite tone into his voice. “Yeah. Sorry, I… have something I need to take care of. Thank you for the food"
“…Alright,” his father says, rising from his seat. He places a hand on Lloyd’s shoulder, warm and heavy. “Safe travels, my boy. I love you"
The words land like an ache in Lloyd’s chest. He forces a smile.
“I love you too, Dad"
He steps away before anyone can stop him or try to draw him back, and a bright golden light engulfs him.
The next time he opens his eyes he already teleported to the roof of his dad monestary, glad to be away from the dread that is family dinner.
He screams a sigh of relief, holding down the railings. and just breathes. Taking in as much air as he could.
He looked up, noticing the rainy clouds starting to form above the sky.
"Urgh.." he sighed annoyed, pinching the bridge of his nose "Just breath... It's okay..." He tells himself
As soon as he calms down the rainy clouds start to disperse.
There's a few things about the golden power that just makes him angry, the main thing is that there's no real control to be had. His power is solely depends on the ability of keeping his emotions in check.
If he's angry it thunders, if he's upset it pours.
There's also the mind reading, even thought he's on the roof, he can still hear the dinner happening down stairs. It's not as clear, just muffled sounds that if he pay attention he could make out what they were saying.
He's just glad the laughter and talking resumed after he left.
Lloyd lays his head down on the railing.
A moment passes,
Then another.
Then he feels a small nudge press at his side.
He lifts his head, the corners of his mouth tugging up despite himself. “I’m okay, Ultra. You don’t have to worry about me"
The dragon’s massive heads crowd around him, nudging, rumbling, inspecting him like a worried mother hen the size of a house. One head prods his shoulder. Another huffs warm air against his cheek. A third lets out a low, scolding rumble.
Lloyd laughs and reaches up to stroke the nearest snout. “I’m fine, really"
Ultra does not believe him.
All four heads lean in closer, wrapping around him like a living barrier, one head resting heavily on his lap, the others bracketing his shoulders. A protective cage of scales, warmth, and concern
Lloyd lets himself sink into the dragon’s embrace.
“Can we leave? Please?” Lloyd whispers.
Ultra doesn’t hesitate. The massive dragon shifts, lowering his body giving Lloyd space to climb. The heads pull away just far enough for him to move.
Lloyd steps onto the dragon’s back, fingers brushing against warm scales. Then he sinks down slowly, exhaling as he stretches out along Ultra’s spine, cheek pressed against the familiar ridges.
“Thanks,” he breathes.
Ultra rumbles, a deep sound that vibrates through the dragon’s entire body.
Then Ultra moves.
Wings unfurl, enormous and powerful. One flap shakes the rooftop tiles. Another lifts them clear off the monastery. And with the third, they’re airborne.
As Lloyd looks down at the small houses from down below, the giant moon brighting each part of the land in a soft blue glow, he feels like he could do this forever.
Truth be told, Lloyd just doesn't care much about this world. It's hard to.
How could he? For the longest time all he knew was a world of pain, hunger, hatred.
He knows what if feels to be happy now, he's gotten that taste of happiness, but even then, when he thinks back to Darkleys...
He never told Misako he remembers the day she left him there.
When she called Darkleys to get him enrolled, she never called him her son during that entire phone call, only "Garmadon's son".
He wonders that the few memories he has of her calling him son was just a facade, that the truth is she never saw him like that, that when she looked at him all she could see was the evil his father was capable off.
So when he accidentally bumped into a furniture, breaking one of Misako's beautiful golden trimmed vase that she always kept out of Lloyd's reach. Lloyd cried, he cried. Because he hated making his mom sad, hated looking at her and realizing she was never happy, she always had this depressed and tired look in her eyes. And Lloyd being four, couldn't possibly understand the depth of her feelings.
She lost her husband and had to take care of her son by herself. The amount of pain that must have been to her.
Lloyd tried cheering her up, play with her, talk about toys, and other dumb comics he liked, even making her breakfast and almost burning the kitchen down.
He couldn't make her happy, he wasn't enough.
So when he broke that vase, crying non stop, Misako tried to calm him down, whispering to him to please stop crying, that it would all be okay if he just stopped crying, for him to be a good boy.
But before he knew, he wasn't the only one crying.
So after a few days, when his mother left him in the front gates of Darkleys in a cold winter. He took it as a punishment. She finally had enough of him.
Anyways, all of that to say this world always had the odds against him, he's...lucky to be born at the FSM bloodline. Lucky to have gone into a evil school instead of suffering in a normal school for being the son of Garmadon. Lucky he didn't died of starvation while climbing a mountain searching for his mother.
Yeah, lucky to have the golden power and for being the green ninja.
When he opened his eyes again it was morning.
He brushed off the tears that had swelled up from his thoughts and yawned, stretching his arms and looking around.
Lloyd scoffed playfully, realizing where he was "Really? Your old stables underneath the old monestary? That's where you go when I don't see you around?"
Ultra only growled at his comment, still half asleep.
Lloyd smiled, petting one of the dragon snout "You can sleep a bit more okay? Thank you for taking care of me"
In return Ultra huffed, a smoky cloud hitting in his face.
"Fine fine!" Lloyd giggled "See you around Ultra, don't forget you have to drop the ninja off back at Wu's academy!"
Ultra just rolled his eyes and moved to face the other way.
Lloyd smiled, summoning his golden dragon and flying away.