Chapter Text
"Hey kids I'm home!!" Garcy yelled from the door of their Minecraft mansion.
"Hi mom." Connie chan said as she walked past.
"Where's you dad? And my son?" Garcy asked Charla, who was coming down the stairs.
"Dads still at work and Apples playing Fortnite with Joe." Charla said, opening his Pokémon card binder.
"Nex really needs to take shorter shifts." Garcy said to herself.
"By the way, are you EVER going to tell us where dad works? And how he only gets paid in cash? And how he always wear those weird outfits even though it's freezing?" Connie asked.
"You're too young Connie." Apple said as he came up from the basement.
"Wait- so you know and you won't tell me!?" Connie exclaimed.
"Yes, and I'm only telling you that he usually works in fast food parking lots and nothing else." Apple said blandly. A devious smile spread across Connie's face, her mind was at work.
"Hi guys welcome back to my YouTube channel!" Nex was suddenly standing in the the front doorway, fists on his hips, looking as proud as ever.
Apple smiled, a rare thing. "I'm subscribing. How much did you make today?" He asked.
"Solid 5 bands." Nex said.
"Damn you money is🆙" Connie chan said. "Now please tell me what you do for a living!"
Nex glanced at her, then back at his wife "No. Anyways."
Suddenly the front door slams open and a wave of nicely dressed Sharks flop in. "WE ARE THE LOAN SHARKS. YOU MUST PAY BACK YOUR LOANS, NEXUS-NICO-NEEKY-NESSA-NASH-SIERRA-KENNEDY." The shark speaking quite resembled Patrick Bateman, including the gun he obviously had tucked in his belt. Or maybe he was just happy to see me.
"Shut up f*ggot you don't have hands." Nex said as he threw a band at him and the shark struggled to catch it.
“Mommy what does Faggot mean?" Connie chan asks.
"You'll figure that out when you learn what papa does for work." The sharks gather in a circle around the sopping wet money and attempt to count it with their flippers.
"Is that enough?" NexyPapa asks in a snarky tone.
"Yupperoo Bucko Buckeroo. Let's skidaddle gang." They flop out the back door and go down the pools drain, while also singing Linger by The Cranberries in perfect soprano voices. "AND IM INNNNN SOOOO DEEEEEEP. YOU KNOW IM SUCH A FOOL FOR LOANSSSSSSSSSSS."