Chapter Text
It was, in Charlie’s opinion, far too early to be working, and certainly too early to be socializing. She couldn’t possibly be expected to properly interact with people on an empty stomach, but her stomach had yet to wake up enough to eat—even the smell of the fresh bread and baked goods was more nauseating than enticing, and she considered bread among her great loves. Nonetheless, when most of the morning tasks were complete and the bakery employees had a minute to chat as they cleaned and set up displays, she plastered on a friendly expression and prepared for conversation.
“I think the owner of the bakery is cheating on his husband,” Avery announced with no preamble, and nothing could have prepared Charlie for that.
“Cheating?” Blake repeated, looking thrilled, just as Charlie questioned, “Husband?”
“Yes! I saw him with a guy in the park—”
“Just hold up, hold on, one minute,” Charlie said, pausing in the middle of wiping down a table to stare at Avery, too baffled to care that she was interrupting. “How do you know he has a husband in the first place? Are you close personal friends with the owner of this bakery?”
“First off, you don’t need to be close personal friends with someone to know they’re married, but I mean the guy he always shows up here with, the one who never comes inside.”
“‘Comes inside,’ you say?” Blake looked over at the girls and raised his eyebrows suggestively.
Charlie made a face and resumed wiping. “Don’t be weird. In any case, I’ve never seen a wedding ring.”
“What, are you staring at his hands?” Then Blake tilted his head, considering. “Not gonna lie, that’s valid.”
“No, I just—It’s entirely possible he wears one, I’m just saying I haven’t noticed.”
“Doesn’t mean they’re not married either way,” Avery said.
“And if they were married, why would the husband always just wait outside?”
“Deep-seated fear of bakeries? Maybe a bakery ate his family,” Blake contributed helpfully.
“Allergies?” Avery offered as an alternative. “I don’t know, it doesn’t matter why, the point is, why would they always show up together if they weren’t married?”
Charlie shook her head. “I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but married people aren’t with each other 100% of the time.”
“Okay but if you’re gonna be with someone 100% of the time, it’s probably gonna be your spouse, don’t you think?”
“Maybe he’s a criminal and the guy outside is his parole officer,” Blake theorized.
Charlie raised an eyebrow. “I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but criminals aren’t with their parole officers—”
“It doesn’t have to be 100% of the time, asshole, it just has to be whenever he visits the bakery. Maybe it’s like an employment check thing?”
“Wouldn’t the guy come in if that were the case though?” Avery pointed out.
“True, but also, I don’t know if you’re aware of this—”
“Will you stop it!”
“I’m just saying, there are more options than ‘husband’ and ‘parole officer.’”
“Yeah? Name one, I dare you,” Blake challenged.
“Maybe he’s disabled and that’s his caretaker, I don’t know, I’m just saying.”
“I don’t know, man, it sounds like he’s married to his parole officer who had a bakery eat his family,” Blake said with faux-solemnity.
Avery huffed. “Maybe it’s allergies, maybe he’s just weird, maybe they’re both just weird. That’s not the point.”
“Yeah, the point is you’re making shit up,” Charlie retorted.
“They could be married, okay!”
“Okay.” Charlie paused her cleaning momentarily to hold up her hands in surrender. “If you say so.”
“I do.”
“Okay, so let’s say they’re married,” Blake said, ushering them past the issue. “Guy in the park?”
“Yes!” Avery lit up again. “He was with this guy, they were sitting on benches next to each other—”
“Sorry, ‘benches?’” Charlie couldn’t help but interject. “Were they sitting on different benches?”
“Yes, they were each sitting at the end of their bench—”
“Were they even together?! This sounds like he just happened to be sitting next to some random guy—”
“If you would let me speak! They were absolutely together. They were leaning toward each other. The owner—actually, what even is the owner’s name again?”
Charlie looked around at the walls to see if it was displayed anywhere, but no luck. “Uhhhh, Mr. Carrey? Carter? I swear it starts with a ‘c’ or ‘k’ or something.”
“Campbell,” Blake guessed, followed by Avery with “Calloway,” and Charlie with “Cooper.”
“Cullen. Edward Cullen, actually,” Blake suggested next, earning a little shove from Charlie as she detoured on her way to her next table.
“Cay—Cal—Cole…man…” Avery began just throwing out sounds, and Blake followed suit.
“Cast—Car—Kat—Kaf—”
“Oh my God, Caffrey!” Charlie exclaimed a bit too loud as it clicked in her memory.
“I was gonna say Kafka but yours is probably more likely,” Blake said with a shrug.
“No I’m like 90% sure.”
“So anyway,” Avery continued her story to Charlie as Blake retrieved more goods for the display, “it looked like a very emotional conversation between Mr. Caffrey and this man—”
“Were they having sex during this very emotional conversation?”
“What? No, why on—”
“Holding hands?”
“No.”
“Touching or clearly flirting at all, whatsoever?”
“I mean I didn’t see—”
“So you saw Mr. Caffrey having a regular conversation and assumed— I can’t even— Jesus Christ, man.”
“I’m telling you, it was way too intense a conversation,” Avery insisted.
“There are no words for how delusional you are right now. Friends can have intense conversations. And how are you even sure it was Mr. Caffrey? Haven’t you only seen him like once?”
“Twice, and his appearance is…memorable.” Avery pressed her lips together and ducked her head lower, appearing very focused on the spot she was wiping. Charlie smirked but didn’t say anything. “Anyway, sure, friends can have intense conversations, but I say not in this case. Plus, y’know how gay men used to hook up in parks in the nineteen-whatevers?”
“You literally just said all they were doing was talking, and it’s not the nineteen-whatevers.”
“Yeah, tell that to my parents,” Blake muttered as he returned to the display case.
Charlie and Avery exchanged sympathetic but unsure looks, debate temporarily forgotten. Avery ended up the braver woman, asking gently, “How did last weekend go?”
Blake flashed a sarcastic smile. “On the bright side, they were so busy ranting about how I’ll spend eternity in Hell if I keep ‘choosing this path of sin’ that they completely forgot to berate me for not choosing a ‘real major’ again.”
“Sexuality famously being a choice,” Charlie said dryly.
“Right up there with gender,” Blake agreed.
The girls waited, but he gave no indication of intending to continue.
“You wanna talk about it?” Avery asked after a minute.
“I’m fine. Thanks.”
For a moment, the three worked in silence. Neither woman wanted to be insensitive by tactlessly plowing on, but his initial comment had been more or less to himself to begin with, and he did say he didn’t want to talk about it…
“So,” Charlie began, trying to steer them back to more lighthearted ground and provide Blake a distraction. “Mr. Caffrey is clearly with both the guy who always waits outside the bakery and the guy in the park,” she said, accepting the premises in a peace offering to Avery. “Doesn’t mean he’s cheating. They could be poly.”
Avery returned to the subject with enthusiasm. “You know what, you’re actually so right and I’m ashamed I didn’t think of that before.”
“Hopefully a bakery didn’t eat his boyfriend’s family, too, and they can come around together sometime,” Blake said, taking the excuse to move on gladly. “He deserves to have someone come in the bakery with him.”
Charlie put away the cleaning supplies and leaned against the counter. “Question is if the husband is also dating the boyfriend or just Mr. Caffrey.”
“Nah.” Avery shook her head as she joined Charlie at the counter. “We definitely would’ve seen them all together if the boyfriend and husband were also together.”
“Who knows, Avery, maybe there’s room for another.”
“I’m not—that’s not—”
“Hey, you’re the one who said his appearance was memorable.”
“Definitely right, though.” Blake nodded appreciatively. “I would.”
Avery pushed off from the counter and started walking toward the bakery entrance. “Okay, well, glad we solved the mystery of cheating or poly, good talk—oh what’s that? It’s time to open up the store? I have to walk away now? Oh nooooo.”
“We technically still have—”
“I can’t hear you! You’re too far away!” Avery cut Charlie off from maybe ten feet away.
Blake tsked. “Don’t be a coward, just say you wanna fu—”
Avery violently pushed in a chair, making it screech against the floor. “Oh wow! What a fascinating chair and table!”
Charlie and Blake grinned, satisfied, and let the matter drop—for now.