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It was a gloomy day.
The sky cried, the thunder roared, and Sasuke waited.
Nowadays, all he did was wait.
Naruto always came home later than he said he would, and like clockwork, Sasuke would be on his ass again.
Sometimes they would fight. Sometimes they would sleep in different beds. Sometimes they would kiss under the moonlight.
Tonight was like any other, Sasuke closed the book in his hands and stood up.
Naruto walked in late, bags under his eyes and a posture that let Sasuke know tonight was not going to be a good night.
“I’m sorry,’ Naruto mumbled, unclipping his cloak.
Sasuke didn’t say anything.
He only grabbed Naruto’s cloak from his hands, and folded it neatly before setting it aside.
The lights were off, and the clock hit twelve.
“Hungry?” Sasuke asked, turning to him with a raised brow.
Naruto shook his head, unzipping his jacket and folding it. “No.”
Sasuke hummed. “I’ll prepare the bath for you.” He turned away, disappearing out of Naruto’s sight.
He didn’t say anything, didn’t follow Sasuke like usual with his constant chatter. He walked toward the low table, and sat on the floor.
The Sand village was in a crisis—short of funds to treat the housing budget of the families. Naruto had been in back-to-back meetings this whole week, gathering resources and supplies from their emergency fund, meeting with the council and forming new plans with endless loopholes.
He tried to save his energy for Sasuke—he tried to give him the time, to satisfy his needs, to be home earlier.
To his avail, he started feeling more unhappy—not with Sasuke, but with himself. For how he had been so adamant that he would treasure their time together and give Sasuke much more of himself when he became Hokage.
Though, now, it seemed like he’d been wrong.
He had left Sasuke behind like everyone else.
He promised Sasuke that he would be a good husband, but how could he be a good husband if he couldn’t get his priorities straight?
Sasuke was so kind to him—so gentle with him.
He had always been that way, even when no one else was. Even when the village hated him, when he thought nobody saw him, Sasuke was still there. He was still kind, and he was still there after all these years.
Naruto felt stuck, felt mad at himself. He tried to talk to Shikamaru—thought about hiring more assistants so he could spend time with Sasuke—but they couldn’t afford to call for back up when so much of their funds were already at risk.
It wasn’t fair to Sasuke and there was nothing Naruto could do.
Sasuke walked out slowly. “You should—” He paused abruptly. “What happened?” He asked, taking a step closer towards Naruto.
Naruto glanced at him, and then shook his head as he got up. “Nothing,” he said dismissively.
“Thanks, Sasuke.”
He gave a polite nod—not a grin, not a smile—but a fucking nod, like Sasuke was his roommate, not his husband.
Sasuke’s mind went blank.
He bit his tongue and tilted his head towards the kitchen.
Sasuke had always known that his and Naruto’s relationship was different. It wasn’t solely based on love, compassion—the usual. Their bond had always been unordinary; it stood on mutual understanding, trust, honesty and boundaries didn’t exist between them. It hurt more than it should have because Naruto wasn’t telling him anything—he wasn’t acknowledging the bond they’d built on the ugly truths.
Especially since Sasuke had forced himself to open up and let himself be vulnerable with Naruto. He expected the same from Naruto. He thought he’d done a good job at being there for his husband whenever the time arose, but Naruto’s behavior started to make him think otherwise.
After the years spent together, he thought that maybe they had finally figured it out. He thought they finally learned to give themselves to each other as a whole. But sometimes, even the smallest of problems occurred, and he felt the shift—the fear of losing it all once again.
Those were the times Sasuke felt terrified.
Those were the times where his hands trembled and his mind went back to the scene of his clan’s massacre.
Times when he’d longed for the love he would never receive again—when he thought there was only death that awaited him after he fulfilled his goal.
“You’re shaking,” Naruto said, his hand wrapping around Sasuke’s waist.
Sasuke flinched at the sudden touch, and then melted into it the next second. He plucked off a piece of orange he had been peeling and put it into Naruto’s mouth.
“Tastes sour. What were you thinking?” Naruto grinned but it didn’t reach his eyes, and it made Sasuke’s stomach twist.
Sasuke tossed a piece in his mouth, savoring the sour taste with a blank face. “You lie to me,” he said, his voice flat but underneath the barrier, it wavered. Just enough for Naruto to notice.
Naruto’s grin faltered, his grip on Sasuke’s waist loosening. “...What?”
Sasuke continued to peel another orange, his fingertips turning white with the residue. “You never tell me anything anymore,” he continued, his tone still rough and distant. “I try not to notice your indifference, but it hurts me, Naruto. I know you don’t mean to, but it does.”
Naruto’s lips parted but he did not utter a word.
“You wanted me to be vulnerable, and I tried my very best to be honest with you even if it made me uncomfortable. It’s still difficult for me, but I do it because you ask me to. But you don’t even try to be honest—you don’t tell me anything because you don’t want me to worry, but I worry anyway. You don’t eat. You’re exhausted. You leave before I wake up and come back when I’m asleep. It bothers me.” Sasuke’s throat burned—his heart screamed to not put anymore pressure on Naruto, but he had to. He couldn’t go on like this any longer.
Naruto’s eyes lowered. His hand threaded through his hair and he let out a sigh. “I’m sorry, Sasuke,” his voice was low and apologetic. “Everything is a mess, and I don’t know what to do. Everyone is counting on me and I don’t want to let anyone down.”
“You’re letting me down.” Sasuke turned to him, feeding him another piece of orange.
“I’m sorry. I don’t want to let you down but—”
“Then don’t.” Sasuke tore off another piece, stuffing it into Naruto’s mouth. “I’ll wait. I always will, but you aren’t putting in the same effort and I won’t settle with that.”
Naruto’s breath hitched before he leaned in to place a kiss onto Sasuke’s forehead. “How can I fix this?”
Sasuke met Naruto’s eyes. “Talk to me. Be with me. Take care of yourself…and be home on time.” He reached out to brush his fingers against Naruto’s chest.
Naruto nodded immediately. “Anything else?”
“I would never trade you for anything.” Sasuke leaned in and caught Naruto’s lips with his own.
Naruto couldn’t help but laugh against his lips. “I love you, too and more.”
“Moron.” Sasuke rolled his eyes but the corners of his mouth lifted.
The next time it happened, Sasuke was not so forgiving.
Naruto hadn't returned home last night, and Sasuke had taken it upon himself to pay his husband a visit. When he had opened the door, he found Naruto tumbled over the desk and stilled.
Sasuke had given up.
He turned, shutting the door with an undeniable force before he walked away.
Naruto woke up at the loud slam and froze as the afternoon sunlight poured in. He knew Sasuke had been here just moments ago for he was the only one who had the guts to slam doors to wake him up.
Shit.
He sprinted through the door, ignoring the stares from the ANBU and the bystanders as he called Sasuke's name.
"Fuck—wait!" He called out, but Sasuke was not waiting anymore. He was done.
When he finally caught up to him, they were in the middle of the busy streets. Naruto on the floor, kneeling before Sasuke as he tugged onto his cloak. "Please, Sasuke. I—I'm sorry!"
Sasuke paused, suddenly aware of their surroundings, of the stares and the whispers.
Sure, he was angry, but he would never drag Naruto's image down, especially as the Hokage of the Hidden Leaf village. Hell, he hadn't expected Naruto to full on kneel before him.
"Naruto!" He whisper-yelled as his hand reached out to grab Naruto's arm. "Everyone's staring." He urged to lift him up but Naruto did not budge.
Naruto did not even care.
"Let them! I don't care what anyone thinks but you—"
Sasuke lowered himself, staring at Naruto in surprise. "You're the Hokage."
"I'm your husband before I'm a Hokage." Naruto stared back, grabbing Sasuke's hand and placing a gentle kiss. "I'm sorry, I upset you again. I shouldn't have done that-"
"Naruto," his voice lowered into a furious whisper. "Listen to me."
"-and I swear I won't ever do it again. I can't believe I made you wait for hours—god, have you even slept? I'm really sorry, Sasuke. I don't know when I—" Naruto froze when his face was pushed to his right and felt a burning sting on his cheek; his mind went blank and he stayed still until he heard collective gasps around him. Only then had he taken note of the crowd gathered.
Only then did he realize what happened.
Sasuke had slapped him. Hard.
Naruto's lips twitched into a wide grin.
And Sasuke couldn't believe his eyes.
"Sas—"
"Shut up." Sasuke commanded.
Naruto complied, placing another kiss onto Sasuke's hand as the warmth in his heart spread and suddenly, he couldn't think anymore.
Every fibre in his being only reminded him one thing: how smitten he was over Sasuke. And he could not agree more.
"Get up." Sasuke ordered again, pushing through the crowd.
Naruto stood, and followed him through the streets like a loyal dog with heart eyes.
They didn't speak until they got home, and when they did, Sasuke laid it onto him.
Naruto listened with a stupid grin on his face.
He'd been in a haze, mind replaying back to the scene of Sasuke hitting him. It ignited the fire he didn't know burned within him; it brought him back to his seventeenth birthday, after the war, when they'd ruthlessly beat each other till their arms blew up.
Naruto had not felt such a bliss like that in decades, and a switch turned on in him. Sasuke, who was so madly passionate, Sasuke, who held him so dangerously gentle—was his, and his completely. His soul, his heart, his mind, his body, belonged solely to Naruto. He'd put himself on a silver platter and offered himself to Naruto to take.
He knew Sasuke like the ache beneath his ribs, breathed him into his lungs—he knew Sasuke didn't ever mean to hurt him; he wouldn't ever do it again, but god—how Naruto wanted it to hurt so good.
"Are you even listening to me?" Sasuke tugged on the collar of his cloak, pulling him closer with a threatening look.
"You looked so good back there."
Sasuke's grip loosened imperceptibly. "Naruto, you—"
"Do it again."
He paused, the tips of his ears hinting a tint of pink. "...Do what? Hit you?" He asked, raising a brow. "Look, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to—'
"I know you didn't... but can you do it again?" Naruto asked, stepping closer.
"...Oh. You're serious."
Naruto nodded in determination.
"You're unbelievable." He rolled his eyes, hand dropping to his side as he turned to leave, but Naruto caught his hand.
He stepped closer, snaking an arm around Sasuke's waist. "I'm sorry I upset you. I wasn't paying attention to the time and must've dozed off," he murmured against Sasuke's ear. "Please don't be mad. I'll make it up to you."
Sasuke tilted his head. "And how exactly will you do that?"
"I'll take a week off from work."
"Three weeks."
"Deal. I'll do whatever you want."
Sasuke sighed, leaning into his touch. "Fine. I'll forgive you. But we're going to the ryokan near the mist."
Naruto chuckled against Sasuke's neck, pecking it religiously. "Whatever you want, teme."