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Jason woke up with a not insignificant amount of regret. Not the regret of being a crime lord, killing more people than he could ever count, literally dying, or any of that fun stuff; it wasn't even the classic college-aged regret of getting plastered and then waking up having slept through your 8 am class. No, it wasn't anything like that, in fact, he should be feeling the regret of a hangover, but instead of partying all night he had the privilege of patrolling the scum ridden streets of Gotham's south side.
He sat up in bed and felt a wave of pain wash through him, radiating from his joints, as if he were an actual eighty year old man on the verge of death. Jason signed and considered the curative power of simply not moving for the foreseeable future. As if in protest, his stomach growled loudly, forcing him to accept the reality of the morning.
After grunts, groans, and words Alfred would not approve of, he made it out of his bed and into the kitchen. He'd grabbed a hoodie on his way over, but hadn't taken the time to grab anything to separate his feet from the cold tire, leaving him standing in his kitchen wearing his old Wonder Woman hoodie and his favorite pair of basketball shorts staring at the coffee maker like it held the secrets of the universe.
Normally on a morning like this, when he didn't have anything on the docket for the day, he would make himself a nice breakfast, eggs, bacon, the whole lot. Today however, he had to settle for one of the muffins Alfred had dropped off a few days before and a warm cup of coffee. The night before it had snowed for the first time of the season, and Jason had unfortunately been out patrolling without the supportive heating elements of his suit.
He'd grumbled and groaned two years ago when his family had cornered him and forced him to adopt the accommodation. That was, in his opinion, one of the worst parts of being murdered and brought back to life before the end of high school, not only did he miss out on the years of athletic prime but he had traded it in for chronic pain (it was fine though, of course it was, it had to be).
Right now he was curled up in a blanket on his couch, muffin demolished and coffee in one hand, book in the other. If standing hurt then he'd just sit, and if he wasn't doing anything, he might as well have a nice time. Logically he knew he should be going through his case files, but walking back into his room to get his laptop seemed like an insurmountable task at the moment, so instead he let himself be still for a moment. It was a nice moment, even with the pain that radiated from his hip and shoulder
In the beginning the pain had been an unpleasant reminder of where he's gotten it in the first place. His right knee and hip plus his left shoulder were especially mangled by a particular clown's crowbar, and they never really got over it. Goddamm, Jason though, they keep a worse grudge than I do. Which was probably true, after many *many* hours of therapy with Dinah and heart to hearts with Bruce lead to his mental health being at an all time high (the Joker dying in Arkham last year didn't hurt either).Needless to say, his physical body hadn’t caught the memo that they were doing better now.
Jason was roused from his thoughts by a familiar knock at the door, two sharp taps followed by a three part thump-thump-thump; by the sound he knew it was Roy. “Come in!” Jason hollered in the direction of the door, although there was no need, the door had already been swung open and Jason could hear the stomp of boots being unceremoniously kicked off. Jason heard something else hit the ground too, although this time with a little more care. Before he could ask about it, Roy started to approach him from the back of the couch.
“So… Kori told me that if we’re dating I have to get you a gift because it’s cold now, and I just thought that, ya know, she probably knows…”
Roy had moved around to the front of the couch; Jason made a face, Roy blanched.
“But, obviously that’s stupid, and that’s what I told her too, I was like-”
Jason reached up to grab his partner’s arm, his body protested at the movement, but a smirk came across his features, “All I was going to ask for is a hello, but your gift sounds lovely.”
Roy looked more than slightly embarrassed, “Sorry- Good Morning,” his head slightly tilted as he responded. Jay scoffed, considering Roy was a master archer and world class fighter, he could be such a nerd. His hand was still holding the other man’s arm; he tugged on it, attempting to make him join him on the couch, but his aching shoulder made it seem slightly pitiful. Even still, Roy took the hint, joining him among the mass of blankets. Looking closer at Jay, his brow furrowed.
“Are you okay? I thought you’d be in the kitchen.” His eyes widened, “Did you get stabbed? If you got stabbed again and didn’t tell me i’ll kill you- I swear Jay-”
He gave a deep sigh, he hated conversations like this,
“No, Roy, I’m not stabbed, I woke up and my joints fucking hurt because I’m the twenty-five year old equivalent of an elderly grandfather.”
Roy’s face dropped with understanding, “Oh Jay, I’m sorry. Is it from the snow?” Jason gave a deep groan before letting out an unimpressed, “Yeah- I mean, I can only assume.”
Roy suddenly got excited, more excited than the situation warranted, “Okay, wait, I got it, wait here! I mean- not like you’d be able to follow me, but still.”
Aaaand there it was, classic Roy Harper sass, he’d gotten worried an alien had infiltrated his partner and was coming for him in his vulnerable state. Nice to see he hadn't changed too drastically.
When Roy came back his arms were laden with a vast cornucopia of blankets, tea bags, coffee beans, and what looked like a Red Hood mug wearing a Santa hat. Jason's confusion could only be matched by Roy's enthusiasm.
“It's the gift I got you! Kori sort of convinced me to go all out, but if you're hurting then… maybe it'll help?”
Wow. That was… really thoughtful. He didn't think he'd ever had something like this happen, and honestly, it felt really good to be taken care of in this way.
“Oh my God, thank you Roy, I-”
“Shut up, I know what you're going to say and we don't have time to be mushy.”
“Okay,” Jason said aloud, thank God, he thought to himself.
“That's what I thought. Now, I'm making you another cup of coffee. French or American?”
Jason stared in shocked silence for a moment, Roy simply continued,
“I don't know why I even asked, good ol’ French bean juice coming right up.”
One watch of the 2005 Pride and Prejudice later they were both snuggled on the couch, coffee cups emptied and discarded. Roy was staring at him for longer than was generally considered normal, while Jason was trying to accept the affection without running away. Although, running away would be quite difficult right now, the warmth and rest hadn't helped the pain like it normally did, instead his joints continued to protest louder than was (by Jason's standards) strictly necessary.
To everyone's disappointment, Jason eventually did have to leave the couch, a fact made more pressing by a full bladder and the need of a shower. He groaned just thinking about it.
“Are you okay?” Roy asked,
“Yeah, I just have to get up and it sounds like hell.”
“Do you need help?”
Jason leveled a look at his partner, “Even if I did, do you honestly think I would say yes?”
“Fair point”
Jason reluctantly threw off the blankets and rose to standing. He'd expected it to hurt, pain was never surprising to him, but as soon as he put weight on both legs his right hip completely locked up sending shoots of agony through his body,
“Motherfreakingdammit!” He exclaimed, nearly tilting forward into the coffee table. Roy shot up and grabbed his arm to steady him. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” Jason said with difficulty, “my hip's locked up.”
“Okay, is there anything I can do?”
“Not really, it'll get over itself in a sec”
“Alright,” Roy looked at him with a smirk, “did I hear you say ‘mother freaking dammit’?”
Jason sighed, Alfred's training showed up at the worst time.
“We're not talking about it.”
Roy laughed slightly, “You got it boss.”
Eventually Jason made it to the bathroom, although he decided on a bath instead of a shower. Roy had left, claiming an errand to run, but promised to be back within the hour. Seeing as he was alone, Jason indulged himself with some worries. Mornings like this were happening more and more often, Leslie already gave him steroid shots every few months, but clearly it wasn't enough anymore. How would this end? If this kept up he wouldn't be able to be a vigilante for much longer. The thought nearly sent him spiraling, it wasn't like he was only useful as brute force, and it wasn't like his family would be disappointed in him or anything… would they?
Before he could get too deep into his own thoughts, Jason decided it was time to get out. The process was easier than he assumed it would be, the warm water and Epsom Salt made the movement more comfortable than it would have been. Within just a few minutes he was clothed, his hair was blow dried (easier than a towel), and he was back on the couch waiting for Roy.
When the door finally opened, Roy wasn't the only person stepping through the door, or rather, rolling. Immediately behind him was Barbra Gordon, with a box on her lap she seemed oddly protective of. As if that wasn't enough of a concern, she also had the look on her face she only got when she knew she was about to have to prove a point. For his part, Roy was carrying grocery bags full of what seemed to be… groceries. Odd.
Jason decided to play it cool, “Hey Babs, what are you doing here?”
She rolled her chair over to the wall and walked over to sit next to him on the couch, Roy was busy with what sounded like putting up the groceries he'd gotten. That wouldn't be odd for any of his siblings, but Jason was proud in his well-stocked pantry. Whatever, he'd ask later.
“Roy told me you were having a bad day, figured you might want to talk to someone who could relate.”
Hmm. She had a point there, not that he wanted to talk, hell no, but if he had to it would be with Barbra.
“Um, I mean maybe the first one depending on who you ask, but we both know I'm not fond of talking about shit like this.”
She elbowed him in the ribs, “yeah I know, that's why you're going to listen to me instead.”
That was not what he'd been expecting, but he'd let it happen, especially because it sounded like Roy was starting to cook something for the three of them and it smelled heavenly.
“Okay,” he conceded, “I'm all ears.”
Barbra sighed and started with a genuine tone of voice.
“You know how, after I had my surgery, I went back as Batgirl for a while?”
He did, the state of the art procedure had given back Barbra her legs, after her recovery she'd gone back as Batgirl for a few months, but eventually decided she did more good as Oracle.
“Yeah, of course.”
“Well, there were several reasons I came back to Oracle other than how useful she is. The surgery did work. I had my legs, my mobility, everything I wanted, except I was in horrible pain all the time. As long as I was Batgirl, I would never be able to be Barbra Gordon because all of my off days were spent exactly where you were today, plus, I knew I wouldn't be an effective vigilante for much longer if I stayed.”
“Wow, Babs, that's-”
“I'm not done. I came back as Oracle, and everything was great. I was walking, I was living, it was all going according to plan, until we got one awfully cold winter and my body just snapped. After the trauma it experienced as well as the surgery, it could no longer hold itself together without help, so I started using a cane. Obviously over the next several years I deteriorated and now I use my chair again. Not because I'm weak, but because it lets me be able to feel good on the days I decide to go without it.”
“That's all well and good Bab's but what-”
“I'm getting to the point, God you're so impatient,” she said with a laugh
“Stop flirting with my boyfriend Barbra!
With that they both devolved into momentary giggles, “Ew!” They both yelled at the same time.
She let out a breath and continued,
“I've seen you on patrol the last few months, and I can tell you aren't doing as well anymore, and this morning confirms it. You don't have to stop or start doing anything if you don't want to, as long as you still remain functional, but if you were looking for a sign, I brought something.”
She grabbed the long box from off of the coffee table and handed it over to him. The wrapping was simple and white with a ribbon holding the lid on, it was heavier than he'd expected, it had the weight of something with quality.
Once the lid was off he saw a polished wooden cane surrounded by tissue paper,
“It was my dad's,” she said in explanation, “It was the first cane I ever used, I got it modified for your height because I'm pretty sure you're actually half giant, but that doesn't mean you have to start using it right now, this month, or this year, but I can tell that your body is struggling and I want you to know that you still have worth outside being the Red Hood.”
Jason felt tears stinging his eyes, “I- thank you, but, what would I do? How could I help? How could I keep doing the only thing I know how to do?”
“Well, for starters, we could lower your patrol hours, and eventually even put you on reserve, basically as a substitute.”
Jason almost laughed at the idea of a substitute vigilante, but he managed to keep a straight face.
“But, I've been thinking about it, and we really need someone to do more technical things for us, Chemistry, Interrogation, undercover work; all things you're one of the best at.”
She paused and put her hand on his, locking eyes, “and this way Jason, you could go to college, have a career outside of this life. It's an opportunity everyone else has had except for you, and it's something worth considering.”
Jason sat in silence for a long moment, not knowing what to say. Luckily, Roy came in with some amazing Alfredo to break up the conversation, and one laughter filled meal later Babs was on her way out. As Jason was saying his goodbyes to the two of them; Roy was going to drive her home, she caught his hand and said, “Consider it Jay, okay?”
Once he closed the door, he let out a deep sigh. He glanced over to the table where the cane lay. Maybe this could work out?