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Hakarias sat in his cold chambers, mumbling rites to the god of death. He hated this stupid dungeon and the idiotic morons in here. Especially that horse, Laukas .
That no good, soft, sparkly, nosy insect, who constantly came down to harass him when he was simply trying to exist. He should’ve moved further down in the dungeon. At least that way he’d have to worry less about running into him here.
Like the gods themselves were making fun of him, at that exact moment he heard the telltale clip clopping of hooves descending down the spiral staircase.
He paused immediately, a cold sweat breaking on the back of his neck, like he’d been activated by a sleeper agent upon hearing those footsteps. He immediately darted up and hid behind the altar, crouching to make himself smaller.
“Hakariaaaas~” the irritating, jolly voice of the creature echoed throughout the chamber.
“Where are you? I’m bored!”
He cursed at himself for ever talking to the thing in the first place.
He thought he could’ve converted him, and thought he was being oh so gracious by introducing him to his beliefs. But no. It had completely misunderstood the interaction as him inviting him down to chat.
It wasn’t chatting. He hated chatting!! He swore to never speak to another creature in this damn dungeon ever again! He’d go mute! He’d seal himself into the walls and become a hermit never to be bothered aga-
“There you are! I almost didn’t see you behind the big stone tablet!” The voice was now right above him. It was so full of joy, it made him want to go deaf.
“Or were you trying to play hide and seek? You really need to reconsider your equipment! I wouldn’t have found you if it wasn’t for that spiky thing on your head!” It poked him.
Oh god save him for the things he was going to do to this damn beast. He grit his teeth , shook off the violent urges and stood up while brushing off dust off his robes.
“No.” He replied coldly.
“I was. Cleaning.” He lied. It didn’t really matter what he said, the idiot would probably buy it anyway.
“What brings you here.” He forced himself to ask through gritted teeth.
“Nothiiinggg~ I just wanted to see you! It’s been like, three hours?! And now that I can wander around again thanks to the new fellow, I can come visit you! How fun is that?!” Laukas said with joys.
(/ref)
“Very.” The disdain in his voice could have slain an angel. The amount of pure hatred he felt right now was-
His thoughts were interrupted *again* as the man beside him threw an arm around his shoulder.
“When’s the last time you’ve seen sunlight!? You’re so pale! Let’s go to the solar chambers and get you some light!” It began leading him away.
Hakarias swatted his arm away, summoning a plume of glitter from the impact.
”no, I’m busy.” He turned around, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. Which then turned into a bout of coughing as the glitter entered his windpipe.
“Oh no! Look at you! All this dust and mold and gloom is getting to you, we have to get you out of here right away!”
Before Hakarias could protest, he was being dragged away towards the staircase.
“No I insist I cannot come with you-“ but Laukas was having none of it.
“Nonsense!” It cut him off, as was customary at this point.
Hakarias eventually gave in and surrendered, some masochistic part in him convincing himself this was punishment and he needed to take it.
He was about ready to impale himself on the nearest crystal as they reached the doorway to the solar chambers.
He froze.
In the middle of the room, was a cloth, upon which were pillows and various flowers. In the middle sat a small basket.
“What is the meaning of this?” He choked out, nearly disgusted.
“Oh nothing…. WOWW what a coincidence! Someone prepared a picnic here! Wow! Well, nobody seems to be around so I suppose we can go on ahead and check it out!” Laukas was so bad at lying it *hurt*.
Hakarias stared in bewilderment as the white long haired unicorn man skipped his way over to the blanket, his entire being glistening in the sunlight.
He squinted his eyes in disdain and followed him in. There was no getting out of this one.
“Wow! Look! It’s all kinds of things, wow! Strawberries… Pastries… Custard filled doughnuts….” Laukas dug through the basket, feigning surprise, but it was clear he was just listing the items in the basket to show them off to Hakarias.
“Truly riveting.” He replied with the most disinterested, cold tone possible.
Laukas stopped digging the basket and sat down, patting the space next to it.
“Come on, when’s the last time you’ve eaten anything that tastes like food?”
Hakarias scoffed, his food preferences were exactly that. *his* food preferences. It was nobody’s business whether or not all he ate was seaweed Or not.
He sat down with an exasperated sigh, and rubbed his temples. Might as-well get this ridiculous ordeal over with.
As time passed, listening to the nonstop yapping of the man beside him got less and less… difficult to bear.
He found himself almost intrigued at times, nodding his head and reacting.
He caught himself mesmerized by his flowing soft hair.. his beautiful sparkly skin…. Something warm grew inside of him.
What was happening to him? This was preposterous, he was wasting his time, he needed to go back and pr- A pastry was shoved in his face and he opened his eyes, snapping out of his internal dialogue.
It was a powdered doughnut, still slightly warm.
It looked… it looked really good, he couldn’t lie.
He took it into his hand and looked at Laukas, who was gleaming. “I made them myself! Go on! Try it!”
Hakarias’ brow furrowed as he looked down at the pastry. It smelled divine. It sparkled in the sunlight just as its creator did across from him.
He took a deep breath, and closed his eyes, bringing the warm pastry to his mouth.
When his teeth dug in, he nearly burst into tears. The custard spread in his mouth, bringing with it a wave of nostalgia.
His mind was filled with memories. Suddenly he was but a little boy, coming home with his brother after playing outside all day, to a tray of freshly baked vinoisseiries, filled with fresh blackberry jam and glazed with honey.
It tasted like sun, like life, and for a moment he nearly reconsidered his current position in life. Was death really all that great..? Maybe there was more to life than waiting for it to end…
“What’s in these..?” He mumbled between bites, eyes closed, still lost in a fantasy of childhood and freedom.
“Oh! You like them!? I’m so glad! I tried a secret ingredient that Gerhard taught to me about! Don’t tell anyone, but the secret is unicorn semen-“
His eyes snapped open.
And that was the last time he ever ate something someone else made.