Archive of Our Own

Charlotte marched to the front door of Junk ‘N Stuff and flipped the sign to “Open” before changing her mind and flipping it back to “Closed”.  The sobs she had been suppressing in the Man Cave were finally spilling out.

“He’s such a jerk!” she cried out to no one in particular. She turned her attention to the giant T Rex head as she marched back.

“He’s a jerk,” she repeated. “The next time Henry walks through here, just---light him on fire for me, okay?”

She leaned against the glass behind the counter. What had she done to deserve this? The entire day had sucked so far, all Charlotte wanted was a little peace and quiet, and when she dared to ask for it, she got borderline yelled at by her supposed best friend. The memory of it brought fresh tears to her eyes, and Charlotte let herself cry for a bit. Tiredness soon washed over her. She continued to sniffle as she looked over at Omar the Plant and the Chia Pet whose leaves she trimmed to look like Jasper.

“Such a jerk,” she muttered for the third time in as many minutes. “At least you guys are all quiet up here.”

The silence was actually lovely, she thought, wiping her eyes, and the glass countertop was cool and welcoming under her palms. She would take fifteen before getting back to work. She fought the urge to throw and break every expensive trinket around her. That wouldn’t be productive, Char. Plus, it’d just be another mess you’d get stuck with having to clean up. Ooh. What if we rage cleaned? That would be fun.  

So, Charlotte turned on the meanest song she could think of and marched around the store, dedicating every lyric to Henry as she alternated between rapping and lip syncing, as she dusted, sorted and rearranged things to her liking. She had been nagging the guys to help her for weeks; it turned out she was far more efficient on her own.

She had settled back behind the counter and was running a smooth, glass pebble she had found between her thumb and index finger when she heard the beaded curtain rustle open as Jasper walked through.

“Hi Charlotte,” said Jasper carefully, as he stopped by the counter.

“Hey,” Charlotte said flatly. She wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone she worked with today after what they had put her through, but her anger had gone from boiling to a low simmer, and Jasper wasn’t the primary target.

Oooh, that’s a classic,” said Jasper, pointing at her phone, which still played the same song on repeat. She begrudgingly turned down the volume.

“You can leave it on!” said Jasper quickly. “I don’t want to bother you. I was just about to head out.”

“It’s fine.” Charlotte hoped Jasper would leave soon, and fought a groan when he put his backpack on the counter to dig through it.

“Sorry, just, give me a second, I wanted to give you something. Are you okay?”

“Fine,” she said wearily, not wanting to get into it. “What did you want to give me, Jasp?”

Jasper’s face brightened as he found what he was looking for. “Here. I missed you at lunch today.” He pulled out a plastic-wrapped sandwich he had sourced from the Auto Snacker.  

Charlotte was truthfully starving and accepted it gratefully. Jasper pulled out her reusable water bottle he had rinsed and refilled and handed it to her.

“Hydrate or die-drate,” he said cheesily. Fair enough, thought Charlotte. She had lost a ton of water today.

 “Thank you,” said Charlotte genuinely. The water was ice cold. She held out a half of the sandwich he had given her. “Do you want to split this with me?”

“I appreciate it, but no thank you,” said Jasper, and Charlotte took that as a sign to dig in.

“Schwoz said you didn’t eat breakfast today either, so I got you a protein shake, just in case.”

“Seriously?” Charlotte was so happy she could cry. “Thank you so, so much.” He must have gone to the gas station across the street for this. Ultra filtered, mega protein-ated, lower sugar, dark chocolate milk. Charlotte’s favorite.

“No problem. And Charlotte, I’m really sorry for spilling soup on your notebook and all your other stuff.”                                                                             

Charlotte felt the pang of devastation she had momentarily gone without. All of her stuff; completely trashed. She had forgotten about that. Still, she knew it had been an accident.

“It’s ok.”

“I know you live out of that thing; you switched from one notebook per subject to one giant notebook for everything this year. I feel awful. Are you mad at me? I get it if you are.”

“Did you do it on purpose?”

“Of course not!”

 “Then of course not,” Charlotte said simply. Jasper had made every effort to help her clean up, while Henry and Ray had actively made it worse.

“Schwoz took your stuff to the back, I think he’s trying to clean and dry it a little better. So, how’s the store been? It smells way cleaner here. Looks way cleaner too. Did you do all this just now?”

“Rage clean,” said Charlotte, feeling pleased that someone had noticed all her effort. “Store’s been fine, no customers yet since I’ve been up here.”

“Nice,” Jasper said amicably. Charlotte agreed. It was nice to have no customers, and it was nice to have Jasper’s quiet, supportive presence standing on the other side of the counter, giving Charlotte her first meal of the day at… 4:45 PM.

Jasper pulled out a plastic water bottle and took a sip. Charlotte remembered something.

“Jasper, you have a thing today. Aren’t you supposed to-”

“I will, don’t worry. I just… want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Why wouldn’t I be okay?” asked Charlotte. She tried not to be combative, but the anger swelled up inside her.

“Because,” said Jasper, “you were really upset earlier, and you haven’t had anything to eat, and we were really loud, and we didn’t stop when you asked us to. I’m really sorry.”

“You…thank you.” Charlotte didn’t have an iota of anger inside her for her friend. “You are not the only one who needs to apologize right now.”

Jasper fished around in his backpack some more until he handed Charlotte a small, white plastic box. Her mini first aid kit. Charlotte opened it quickly - bandages, gauze, tweezers, and, yes! Two ibuprofen tablets. She swigged them down with water and waited for her headache to ebb away.

“You’re right,” sighed Jasper. “We all owe you an apology. It wasn’t cool to not check on you more often and assume that you were normal-mad at us like it was just another day. We’re all really sorry.”

Charlotte felt the simmer of her hurt and anger start to bubble up again.

“Are you all really sorry? Is Henry sorry? I don’t see him up here trying to apologize, not that I would want to see his dumb, stupid face right now anyway,” she snarled. Charlotte knew she sounded petty, and she didn’t care. She wasn’t even sure what the worst part of the day had been. Jasper looked carefully at her.

“I think Henry’s sorry,” Jasper began softly. “He bought you some Yotally Togurt he was gonna bring up to you… but then Ray stress-ate everyone’s orders before we made it back down the tubes.”

Charlotte kept her arms crossed as she leaned back in her chair and processed this information.                    

“Were there fruit poppers?”

“There were fruit poppers,” Jasper confirmed. That was nice, thought Charlotte, but froyo with fruit poppers wouldn’t fix the giant chasm she felt had opened up between her and Henry. She wasn’t going to waste more brain cells on that jerk right now, so she switched gears.

“How’s your mother?”

Jasper shrugged. “Same as always? Yours?”

“Same as always,” Charlotte muttered.

Jasper seemed to sense that Charlotte wanted alternative talking points.

“How’s L.I.M.P. going this semester?”

“Ask Iris, she’s President now.”

“What!?” Jasper yelled. “Is this, are you, was this planned?” He looked shell-shocked.

“Yeah,” she said tiredly. “I stepped down. Iris is President now, Teyana got bumped up to VP, and Mallory’s only a sophomore, so she’s super excited to be Secretary all of a sudden.”

Jasper studied her face carefully.

“Am I… allowed to ask why you decided to step down? You love L.I.M.P.”

“Exactly,” said Charlotte. “I love L.I.M.P., so I decided to step down. I can’t make those 7AM meetings anymore, not when I update Ray and Hen’s overnight crime reports and optimize their patrol routes in real time. I’m still a general body member,” she said, annoyed by Jasper’s concerned face. “No one asked me to do this. I wanted to. I want our dickwad heroes to be safe, and I want my baby to be in good hands.”

 “I’m sorry,” said Jasper. “Do they know?”

“What do you think, Jasper? Of course they don’t know. They could care less. You heard Henry last year. ‘L.I.M.P. makes me limp.’ Fucking asshole.” It was so crass, even Ray had told Henry off.

Charlotte was always more vulgar when she was in a bad mood. She wished she had some froyo to drown her sorrows in. Oh right. Ray had stress eaten it for her.

“What’s got Ray so stressed?”

Jasper processed the question. “The same thing that’s got us all stressed, I think? He doesn’t want you to quit your job.” Charlotte stared, not responding.

“I mean, he threatened to fire Henry if you quit.”

“Ray is never going to do that,” said Charlotte, rolling her eyes.

“He also threatened to kill him with his bare hands if you quit.”

“You know, that somehow seems more plausible than Ray firing him.”

“Right?” Jasper agreed. He looked at Charlotte before nodding at her and continuing.  “If you want to quit, you can, and you should…we probably deserve it. But everyone would be really sad and much worse off.”

“Would they?” asked Charlotte, laughing bitterly. “It’s not like I do anything useful around here, besides nag and ruin everyone’s day, and not let anyone have any fun, and just stare at the monitors, sitting pretty, doing fuck all.” Charlotte could hear Henry’s voice blend with hers as she re-twisted the knife into what had pushed her over the edge.

Charlotte could see the recognition flash across Jasper’s face, and she shut her eyes so she wouldn’t have to look at it. She didn’t want his pity.

“Jasper, you’re gonna be way late-”

“My grandma’s gonna be dead the rest of my life, Charlotte; it’s okay if I’m a few minutes late to figuring out what to do with all her stuff.”

Charlotte opened her eyes back up. He had said it neutrally, with that smile he had when he tried to put his friends at ease as he lore-dropped the saddest things imaginable, but she still felt bad. Other people were hurting in the world with a bunch of different things that were way worse than Henry Hart being a tool.

“It’s okay, you can go. Why do you even care,” Charlotte asked, putting up last-minute, prickly defenses as she felt the emotion building. Jasper looked completely undeterred as he absorbed some of her grief. He lowered his voice and looked intently at her.

“I care because you’re my friend, and I don’t want you to feel alone, or like no one is listening to you.”

Charlotte could feel her lips tremble as her vision started to swim. Jasper had been the only person who had attempted to listen to her in what felt like the past year. He looked so patiently at her. Teardrops splashed onto the glass display case she leaned against.

Jasper was behind the counter in a flash. He stood an arm’s length away and carefully put his hand on her shoulder.

“Is this okay?” he asked. Charlotte nodded, trying to work through shuddering breaths.

“I know there was a lot that happened to you today,” Jasper started.

Charlotte shook her head. “It really didn’t, it’s fine, it’s just everything; work, family, school, scholarships, Dystopia prep, Henry being a—” Charlotte suddenly found she couldn’t speak anymore if she tried.

Jasper moved his thumb slowly back and forth as he kept his hand on her shoulder. “So, it’s everything, but especially what Henry said to you after you told us we were being too loud?”

“It’s fine,” she choked out, suddenly feeling very alone and very seen at the same time.

“I don’t think this is fine, Charlotte,” Jasper murmured, shaking his head when she glanced back at him.

“Yes, it is,” she insisted, through gritted teeth. It had to be fine, because it had been this way for so long, and it wasn’t going to get any better.

“Are you sure?” Jasper asked, more gently than anyone that day.

Charlotte thought about it.

A lifetime of looking out for her boys.

Sitting pretty.

Charlotte summoned the strength to square her jaw and pull herself together. Instead, she found herself hopping off of Gooch’s old orthopedic cushion that topped the seat of the tall chair she sat on. Jasper kept his gaze on her as she looked to him for answers.

“I just… I don’t recognize him anymore, Jasper,” she admitted, before bursting fully into tears.

She stood with her arms outstretched, like some pathetic toddler, reaching for what, she didn't know. Jasper opened up his arms in response, and Charlotte found herself walking straight into them as he said, “come here,” and pulled her in. He caught her gently as she collapsed against him.

She had no idea where any of this was coming from, but she clung to her friend as she sobbed into his shoulder, tears rolling down onto his clothing before soaking in. Charlotte felt completely lost. She was halfway to being an adult, and she was also crying, honest-to-God, open-mouthed boo-hooing like a maimed child, over strikes and blows and wounds she couldn’t see or understand. All Jasper did was keep his arms wrapped around her, rubbing her shoulder and back. “You’re okay,” he said. “It’s okay. It’s okay, Charlotte.” Over and over, no matter how long she cried, it seemed that Jasper was the only solid thing in her universe.

Somehow, after what felt like an eternity, Charlotte stopped shaking and stood quietly, tears still trailing down tired tracks on her cheeks. Gradually, she loosened her grip on Jasper, who took her hand and helped her back up onto her chair before pulling out a second stool from under the counter and taking a seat next to her. They sat quietly for a minute.

“Sorry,” Charlotte finally said, still properly confused by herself.

“What for?” Jasper asked.

“I don’t know… for crying all over you like that? I don’t even know where that came from,” Charlotte mused, feeling the heat rising in her cheeks as she averted her eyes.

Jasper looked thoughtful as she looked back at him. “To me, it kind of seemed like it was a bunch of things that just kept building and building up until they finally exploded.”

Charlotte cringed at herself. "Well, I’m sorry.” She didn't like to explode.

Jasper didn’t seem to mind. “You have nothing to apologize for. Blow.”

Charlotte laughed unexpectedly as Jasper produced a tissue seemingly out of thin air and held it out right in front of her nose. “I’ve got it, thank you,” she said, taking it from his hand.

Jasper held out his water bottle. Charlotte picked hers up as well.

“Hydrate or die-drate,” she said hoarsely.

“Cheers to that,” Jasper responded, as they tapped their bottles together. He waited for Charlotte to speak. When she didn’t, he spoke up quietly.

“Should we unleash The Threek on him?”

Charlotte laughed wetly, unexpectedly again. “Not The Threek!” Henry swore up and down that nothing scared him, but both he and Ray were convinced that a three-pronged fork someone had sold to Junk ‘N Stuff was haunted and brought nothing but bad luck. Plus, it was just unsettling to look at, Henry insisted. So, it remained triple padlocked in a box stacked under approximately 100 vintage books in a far corner of the store. Charlotte giggled, picturing Henry’s startled shriek as she twirled spaghetti with it and offered him a bite. “Absolutely not,” he had said, before sprinting to the tubes. She was shocked she could laugh so soon after crying. Levity had come sooner than she expected.

“Beware The Threek,” Jasper concluded.

“I hate him,” said Charlotte crossly, suddenly remembering.

“Right now,” Jasper finished.

“What?”

“You hate him right now.”

Charlotte scowled. “I hate him right now, always and forever. He’s a misogynistic, puke-headed imbecile and he sucks and is the worst.” She glared as Jasper slowly mouthed ‘misogynistic puke-headed imbecile’ to himself in awe.

“And he killed my goldfish,” she finished savagely.

The corners of Jasper’s mouth twitched. “That is true. That is… a thing that happened. Is there anything you can think of that would make you feel a little better?”

“Chop off his-”

Jasper cut in quickly. “-Charlotte, think of your scholarships, think about Harvard.”  

Charlotte narrowed her eyes and gave Jasper a sideways glare. “You don’t know how I was going to end that sentence.”

“I don’t know if there’s any way to finish your sentence without you ending up in the back of a police car,” he said gently.

“Fine.” Charlotte kept her arms crossed and fought the smile that her lips were pulling into against her will. “I still hate him.”

She sighed sadly. “Does he really not know? Does he really just think I sit there and do nothing all day?”

“I think he knows you do everything, Charlotte.”

“Does he, though? Why was he so awful to me!?”

“I think… that might have been Henry’s not-great way of saying he was sad you didn’t want to join us. And you’re right. There are way nicer ways to say that to someone.”

Charlotte scowled. “I’m not trying to crush everyone’s fun, I just… needed a break. I’m sorry I don’t want to scream and break things all afternoon.”

“I’m sorry too. You didn’t deserve that. From any of us. And Henry knows it too. He’s pretty torn up about it.”

Good, thought Charlotte. If only her anger burned bright enough to turn her sadness into ashes.

“I don’t… recognize him anymore,” Charlotte sat with this uncomfortable revelation. “I know people change, and I keep trying to keep up with the changes, but I don’t, I don’t deserve this. Bysh didn’t deserve this.” Charlotte’s heart felt like something that had been crushed and stepped on. She didn’t know if she could ever forgive Henry for the first time he morphed into someone she didn’t know.

“He’s still in there. He's just... head empty and doesn't always think right all the time. I think… if he had been in that closet with us… and heard you and Bysh talk, he would have done things differently,” Jasper said slowly. “You did great, Charlotte. You showed Bysh she had a friend in you and you got her out in 72 hours. How’s she doing, by the way?”

“As well as she can be, given the circumstances." Charlotte sighed. “I still write to her. Convinced her to try and study for her GED. It’s just her and her dad, I think she has an easier time staying focused in there.”

“When does she get out again?”

“Six-month sentence for this latest repeat offense ends in June. She can have a high school equivalent certification if she pushes. I think she can do it.”

Jasper grinned. “Are you ladies still gonna get pizza together when she does?”

“That’s the plan,” Charlotte said, hoping it would happen. Her thoughts drifted back to Henry.

“He was so mad I didn’t applaud him and Ray for essentially committing a felony. What am I supposed to do with that? What am I supposed to do with someone who says they’re my friend, but doesn’t listen to a word I say, and shuts me down when they're not ignoring me?”

Jasper fiddled with the lid to his water bottle, rolling it along the glass countertop.

“I think… you don't deserve to get hurt. And if Henry's upsetting you, and he isn't stopping, then you're allowed to help keep yourself from getting more hurt. And if that means stepping back a little, then that’s okay.”

“I can’t step back,” snapped Charlotte. “Every day, all I can see is a million ways for Henry to die or get hurt. It’s my job to see things before they happen and make sure that they don’t. Those crime reports won’t write themselves, those patrol routes won’t predict, optimize or align unless I feed the algorithm that generates them. I don’t know how else to be there for him since he hates my guts.”

“He doesn’t hate your guts. And woah!” exclaimed Jasper. “Since when do you have superpowers? I didn’t know you could see things before they happened, what?! That’s awesome!”

Charlotte scoffed and shoved Jasper lightly.

“Well… at least you appreciate that I can do things,” Charlotte muttered.

Jasper looked at Charlotte fondly.

“I’m not gonna lie, I have no idea about most of the things you do here. I know Schwoz says you’re smarter than him, and that's terrifying, but also awesome.”

“But I know what you’ve done for me. You’re the reason I’m going to college-“

“That’s not true, Jasper,” Charlotte cut in. “Your grades are decent, you’ve worked really hard to pick them up these last couple of years.”

“After I got to study with you in the Man Cave most afternoons,” Jasper finished triumphantly.

“You have a natural inclination towards English and History-”

“History’s just gossip from a long time ago! Who needs to study for that? You just need to listen.” Charlotte laughed. What took her dozens of color-coded index cards to learn took Jasper trying to imagine what Archduke Ferdinand must have been feeling at the time.

“I’m not super great at math. I didn’t understand trigonometry until you labeled the angles as you, me and Henry. After that, it got easy - we make a triangle, and the triangle is the strongest shape in the world! And you kept on helping me even after you launched yourself into super evil genius math classes.”

“You mean Multivariate Calculus,” said Charlotte laughing.

There were other factors too, she knew. Once Jasper had regular access to her tutoring, stable meals and good Wi-Fi, his academic performance had soared; by Senior year, he had made Honor Roll for the first time by sheer effort of will. She recognized the things that Jasper had been subject to in life and admired him fiercely for not letting them extinguish his sweet nature.

“You also walked me through the entire college application process. Piper too! I didn’t know how to get waivers for application fees or how to write about myself in an essay.”

“I would have done that for anyone, Jasper.”

“Okay, but did you have to?”

Charlotte bit the inside of her lip.

Jasper kept on going.

“You’re the reason I have dental floss in my home. You got me that awesome shaving kit, and you gave me deodorant in bulk that I still use to this day-”

“I’m sorry,” Charlotte cringed. Those were birthday gifts she couldn’t think of better substitutes for in their early teens, so she had gone for practicality, copying whatever Henry used. Jasper was making her sound like some sort of saint, while the truth was rooted in her impatience and uncertainty.

“Why? They changed my life. And you also, hang on, do I have it on right now? Yes, I do!” Jasper looked excited as he fished under his hoodie and pulled out a thin gold chain, which had a tiny bucket charm hanging from it.

“Oh my God,” Charlotte exclaimed. “You still have that? And you wear it?”

“Duh. Greatest birthday gift of all time!”

Charlotte remembered how she and Henry had snickered at the almost-joke gift. “What is this, a bucket for ants?” Henry had asked, as they collapsed into laughter. It wasn’t a mean-spirited gift at all; Charlotte truthfully wanted Jasper to keep a piece of his innocence as they navigated high school. But she hadn’t anticipated how much he would love it.

“Jasper… you truly do nothing but see the best in people,” Charlotte marveled.

Jasper shrugged. “I don’t think Charlotte Page has a ‘worst’. Do you know what my favorite thing you’ve ever said to me is?”

“That your hair looks amazing whether you want to wear it curly or straight,” Charlotte answered confidently.

“Nope,” Jasper responded. Charlotte looked astonished. “That is my third favorite thing you’ve ever said to me, though.”

Charlotte cocked her head to the side. She couldn’t think of anything else. It was probably something about buckets.

“You said ‘sometimes, people’s basements smell like chicken shit, and it’s not their fault.’”

Charlotte covered her face with her hands. “God, I’m so-”

“Why? That changed my brain chemistry. I used to get upset with myself for a lot of things, and now I get upset at myself for less things. Kids used to tease me for that stuff. You and Henry never did, and you only ever pointed it out.” Charlotte sighed. Parts of life that involved going from a little kid to a big kid. She had learned not to rattle off every scientific observation she could come up with.

“I can keep going. You taught me how to stack online coupons. You taught me that if you scratch the top of a bug bite off, it releases the poison, and it'll stop itching.”

“Um, I actually think that last one was you,” Charlotte corrected.

“OK, well, you taught us that awesome hand game, “down by the banks with the hanky-panky-”

“That was also you!” Charlotte laughed, indignant.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes! Are you kidding me?” Charlotte held out her hands. “Down the banks was all you,” she insisted, half-convinced he was saying the wrong thing on purpose to get a rise out of her as they clapped out the first line. “I taught you guys the classics, like ‘Miss Mary Mack’” she guided his hands through the motions, “‘Miss Sue,’ and ‘Miss Susie Had a Steamboat’.”

“The steamboat had a bell,” Jasper confirmed. They were both pleased their hands had retained muscle memory of how every game went. “And then Henry taught us ‘Quack-a-dilly-oh-my’-”

“-he learned that at flower camp,” Charlotte cut in.

“He learned that at flower camp, and then at school, we learned ‘Slide’ and ‘Pizza, pizza, pizza pie’…”

Charlotte slapped Jasper’s hand before he could pull it away at the end of their last rhyme. “Ah--- you got me,” he said cheerfully.

“And Ray taught us—”

“’Captain Man, he had a plan, to travel to Uzbekistan,” they both started laughing.

“I should play that one with Henry. It has a face slap built in,” Charlotte mused.

“How are you feeling about that right now?” Jasper asked.

“Like I still hate his guts,” Charlotte admitted. The hurt cut deep. She didn’t know if she had it in her to forgive this time.

Jasper nodded. “That’s progress. Before, you hated all of him, and now, you just hate his guts!” Charlotte scowled. How dare Jasper put a positive spin on her mood. “Is there anything else about Henry that you don’t hate right now?”

“He’s a good brother,” she supplied automatically with a huff. She would never begrudge Henry that, even when she despised him.

“The best. Anything else?”

Charlotte thought about it for a minute.

“He is…a decent cook and competent in the kitchen. His fried plantains are to die for.” Charlotte uttered the last sentence very quickly and quietly so Jasper couldn’t hear her.

 “Anything else?”

Charlotte tried her hardest to channel her inner Jasper. Jasper could turn anything good.

“He... wants to name his daughter Daisy.”

Jasper looked surprised. “Really?”

Charlotte nodded. “Yeah. He said it once when we were like, fourteen. Probably after I asked him if he had any baby names planned out or something. He said roses are too intense and have a lot to live up to, but daisies pop up happy with the bunnies in the springtime." Charlotte closed her eyes as the memory came back to her and relayed it all with academic precision. "He thinks 'Daisy Hart' just sounds adorable, it reminds him of Princess Daisy from Mario Kart, and he said he’s ok with it being a middle or nickname if his partner hates it, just as long as he gets to call a little girl Daisy or Daisy-heart or Daisy-chain for fun. I don’t know why I’m remembering this. I don’t even know if he remembers talking about it. He’d probably deny it today. But he said it once, and I don’t hate that about him,” Charlotte finished, staring at her hands. She hadn’t thought about that conversation in years.

“Anything else you can think of? Charlotte, you okay?”

Charlotte looked up at Jasper, slightly worried.

“That damn squirrel,” she whispered. It had only been four days ago. The three of them had shared the sidewalk when the sight of a dead squirrel on the side of the road had caught them off guard.

“Oh my God,” Charlotte had recoiled, averting her eyes and walking quickly.

“Poor little guy,” Jasper had said sadly, continuing on.

Henry had sucked in his breath sharply, but had otherwise remained silent in the middle of them as they continued on their walk. A few blocks later, Jasper had leaned across and caught Charlotte’s eye. He cocked his head upward, and when Charlotte saw what he saw, they quickened their pace before stopping and turning around to face Henry.

“What, I don’t, I’m fine, you guyyys,” Henry had whined, grinning at them as tears ran down his face thick and fast without stopping. Jasper had put an arm around Charlotte, and Charlotte had put an arm around Jasper, and they had made a protective wall and both pulled Henry down into a hug. Jasper’s hand cradled the back of Henry’s head as he rested his chin on Jasper’s shoulder, shaking his head and laughing at himself as he cried silent tears that he couldn't process. Charlotte reached up and put her arm across Henry’s back, and Henry had wrapped an arm around each of them, and they stood that way for a few moments, holding each other as Henry sniffled quietly and wore a megawatt smile through it all. The sight had terrified Charlotte like no other. Henry pulled away far too soon.

“Blehhh,” he had said, pressing his palms to his eyes for a moment, before shaking his head and limbs to rattle out whatever trauma had ensnared him and grinning at his friends again. “That was weird. Henryway,” and Jasper and Charlotte knew that there would be no further discussion. The best Charlotte could do was yank them both into the nearest Skybucks, caramel frappes for all, her treat. Henry always looked happy in the presence of whipped cream and sugar-laden caffeine.

“You still worried about that too?” Jasper’s voice pulled Charlotte out of her memory. She nodded.

They sat side by side in silence.

"There's another world..." Charlotte began. "Where I'm still L.I.M.P. President, Henry's on the Varsity Basketball team, and you're–"

"–A cheerleader and a Bucket Podcaster phenomenon, and I give you my jacket, and Henry gives me his," Jasper cut in. 

"–And then Henry starts whining because he has no jacket," Charlotte finished. "But...we don't have that world — this is the world we live in now."  

"Sometimes, life goes sideways from how you think it's gonna go," Jasper said, reaching over and putting an arm around her for a moment.

"It's not a bad life," Charlotte said, with a resigned look, as the sides of their foreheads touched. 

"Nope, it's actually an awesome life. Just different. As long as you guys are here, I'm good."

Charlotte sighed. “Jasper, I owe you an apology,” she said heavily, as she let go and sat back up in her chair. 

“No you don’t,” said Jasper, looking at her like she had three heads.

“I do. I’m sorry about the moth attractant.”

“Oh. Piper did that to me. Are you surprised?”

“I was there. I should have put a stop to it. It was wrong. I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, you were just doing what Schwoz wanted."

“Doesn’t matter,” Charlotte replied. “I know how informed scientific consent works. I’m gonna ask Ray if we can compensate you further every time you have to do anything with your body. If you’ve gotta do it, they at least have to pay you more, and you should always have a way out if it gets too uncomfortable.”

"You're gonna make such an incredible biomechanical engineer.”

"Biomedical," Charlotte corrected gently. 

Jasper looked at Charlotte. “Concentration in Robotics, with a potential pre-med or criminal justice track. I wrote it down, so I know it's right. You're gonna be awesome at whatever you choose. And thank you, Charlotte, I appreciate it. You’re always looking out for us."

It never felt like enough. The damage had been done, and Jasper still loved her anyway. Charlotte pushed past her wave of guilt.

“I figured out what I’m getting Ray and Schwoz for their goodbye gifts,” she announced.

“Ooh, ooh, tell me, tell me!” Jasper looked at her like he’d been waiting for this news.

She laughed and pulled up a picture on her phone.

“For Schwoz,” she stated. It was a black t shirt with a checklist written on it in jagged red letters. All three items on the list had been checked off: science, science, science.

“Ha! Amazing,” said Jasper. “How did you even find that?”

“The internet has everything,” Charlotte answered with a grin. “And for Ray, do you remember how we did karaoke and potstickers that one night?”

“You mean our First Annual Benefit Concert for Ray’s Mental Health?” Jasper asked.

“Yes. I secretly recorded the audio for the one song where I did backing vocals for him.”

“Nightswimming!” Jasper announced excitedly. “By Char and the Stars!” Ray had vetoed that name, but Charlotte didn’t care, and neither did Jasper, evidently.

“Exactly,” Charlotte said with a wry smile. “My dad said he could help me convert the file on my phone and burn a CD for Ray. I even kept the part at the end where Henry starts pounding on the table and demanding The Bro Song part four thousand three hundred and ninety-two,” she finished, rolling her eyes. “I did NOT put the actual song on there. But I did add Sunflower as a bonus track so Ray could have something with all of us, where we're goofing off and sound happy.”

“You’re so wise,” Jasper mused. “I hope my gifts are half as good.”

“Jasper, your letters will mean everything to them, and when Ray reads his, I will take a picture of him ugly crying for you. Let me know if you want me to look through our security footage for any pictures you want to include in their collages you're making them.”

“Thank you, Charlotte.”  

“Hey Jasper? What’s your second favorite thing I’ve ever said to you? You told me the third and the first.”

Jasper looked at her and nodded. “When you said I was a good man in a storm.”

Charlotte remembered. When the Toddler had infiltrated their Man Cave last year, and Jasper had told her to climb on his back and use his body like a boogie board. There was never a time when Jasper was unwilling to put his body on the line for her or Piper or Henry.

Even today, as she’d cried a whole monsoon around them and clung to him like driftwood, who but Jasper had kept them afloat until they reached higher ground?

“I stand by that, Jasper Dunlop. You’re a good man in a storm.” Jasper smiled softly at her.

“It would be great if we put in our two weeks’ notice together at the beginning of June, but Charlotte, I support you whether you want to stay or quit,” Jasper started. Charlotte already knew her answer, but she wanted to keep it to herself for now.

“I don’t...know yet,” she lied, and Jasper nodded.

“It’s hard to stay somewhere where everyone says they love you… but you don’t always feel it. I know it’s my place of work, but it’s… it’s been getting harder,” Charlotte admitted. This was the truth and it was a long time coming.

“I care about all of you guys, but sometimes it feels like I’m universally disliked just for existing." Charlotte tried not to let the feeling grow.

“I like you, Charlotte. Matter of fact, ‘I like me better when I’m with you’.”

Charlotte grinned. “Oh! Banned music,” she announced loudly, drawing out the words and holding her hands like a megaphone around her mouth. They both stared into the security cameras and vocalized the musical riff that had irritated Ray and Henry so much, it had gotten a lifetime ban. Jasper yelped in delight when he noticed Charlotte’s middle fingers held up to the camera.

“They’re just mad they couldn’t watch the movie with us,” Jasper scoffed.

“We offered! Their loss!” Charlotte reminded him.

Jasper’s phone buzzed in his pocket.

“Shit, Jasper, you had to go, like 20 minutes ago!”

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it! I think I do need to head out though. Is that okay?” Jasper looked intently at Charlotte.

“Yes, oh my God, go, go go,” she assured him.

“Okay, well,” Jasper hopped off of his chair, reached out and pulled Charlotte into a strong, one-armed hug. She leaned against him and rested her head against his cheek, feeling his jaw move as he spoke.

“Hang in there, okay? I love you, Charlotte. We all do.” He turned his head slightly and pressed a kiss to her forehead for the briefest moment before letting go. She shivered involuntarily at the sudden space and silence in the store.

“Are you cold?” Jasper asked. Charlotte shook her head, but Jasper was already pulling his hoodie off.

“No, Jasper, it’s-”

“Take it. Seriously, you can leave it wherever. I’ll grab it tomorrow.” He thrust it into her hands. Charlotte stared at it. Maybe she’d need a hug later.

“Thank you.” All Charlotte could do was be grateful.

“Oh, one more thing,” said Jasper, walking out in front of the counter and rifling through his backpack a final time.

“Here you go,” he said, holding out a Ziplock bag full of

“-Starry Charms?” Charlotte asked, laughing.

“Well, yeah. You said this country's cereal is like candy with vitamins pumped in.”

“Is there anything you don’t have in there?” Charlotte laughed, marveling at how prepared Jasper had come to talk to her.

“Like I said, the backpack is the greatest invention ever. After the bucket of course. And honestly, they’re neck and neck, because you can use either one to carry the other. Anyway, enjoy your cereal. Henry’s not even here, so you won’t have to share your marshmallows with him.”

Charlotte sighed. “I’ll… talk to him eventually,” she said.

“Good,” said Jasper easily as he strode to the door. “It doesn’t have to be today, but when you’re ready. He wants to apologize to you.”

“I might punch him in the face,” she called out.

Jasper shrugged his shoulders as he retreated. “I look forward to hearing about it. We probably all deserve it for putting you through the wringer today.”

Charlotte draped the sleeves of Jasper’s hoodie over her shoulders and tied them in a knot at the front. She would wear his love like a cape today.

“Hey Jasper?” Charlotte asked. Jasper had already stepped out, but he stuck his head back through the door.

Charlotte looked at one of her best friends, a good man in a storm, and probably a purer person than she or Henry could ever be.

“I’m really proud of you.”

“I’m proud of you too, Charlotte.”

Jasper gave her a wink and a two-fingered salute, and then he was gone.