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the reddit user ottersayshi is in denial.

Summary:

Chan thinks he’s saving lives.
Spoiler:- he is absolutely not.

or;; au in the format of reddit, the roommates share one apartment and zero working braincells.

Notes:

hello hello!! here is wonchan and junhao where chan is dumb (he acknowledges the fact), wonwoo is blind, minghao is minghao and jun needs attention 247!

hope you guys enjoy!! i've been working on this fic since july, and so proud of it!! thank you so much!!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

r/collegecrush · 13 hr. ago

r/ottersayshi

My roommate is in love with our other roommate and I am sacrificing myself for their happiness (and also cuddling a lot, but that’s unrelated)

okay reddit, strap in because i’m about to give you all the confusing but noble acts of love in the whole roommates history.

so, before the actual plot, let me introduce the casts! 

i (21M) live with three other guys; wjh (24M), jww (24M) and xmh (23M) in a shared apartment which is kinda near to our university. if anyone is curious, i can give you a bit of detail about each of them.

wjh— 24 M. he is the eldest among us. hyung is hot and dramatic af. he has got a weird (??) taste in wearing silk robes around our apartment when he gets bored.

jww— 24 M. my absolute favourite hyung! he has glasses but pretty rarely wears them, it is kind of getting concerning, but his mysterious and ethereal look compensates for everything.

xmh— 23 M. you know that meme, ‘looks like it's a cinnamon roll, but would kill you.’? yeah, that’s him. hyung is pretty and has this resting murder face, which is honestly attractive af. 

so, now coming to the main tea.

jww is in love with wjh.

no, jww hyung hasn’t told me, but i have SEEN the way jww hyung stares at wjh hyung. like, those long, unreadable stares from across the living room, where wjh hyung prances around in sweatpants. and it’s honestly, a bit embarrassing. jww hung stares at wjh like the poets and artists stares at their muse. it’s soft, intense as well as tragic.

so, as a good person (and excellent matchmaker and supportive friend!!), i’ve taken it upon myself to help my favourite hyung out!

and how, you may ask? 

well, i’m keeping xmh hyung occupied.

yes, i am well aware that i am playing with fire by clinging on to xmh hyung. i have emotionally and physically claimed xmh hyung as my fake cuddle buddy, my emotional recharge station, my only option for a grocery shopping partner.

everytime we go on for light night walks (just our roommates bonding time every once in a while), i walk next to him and hold his hand, and display a soft smile as i call him, “hi hyung! i missed you!” and to my surprise, xmh hyung did not try to strangle me? it’s a good sign to continue!

it’s all fake, we know that. i’m basically doing the god’s work, so it’s okay!

this way, i can ensure that jww hyung and wjh hyung can have their alone time during the grocery runs, late night walks, and whatever an introvert like jww hyung’s romance is like!

xmh hyung lets me hang off his arms like a weighted scarf. sometimes he sighs like he wants to dropkick me, but he hasn't done it yet, so i think we're bonding. i even started doing my skincare routine with xmh hyung and my pores are thriving!

one time i caught jww hyung watching me with a soft expression while we were grocery shopping! it was as if he was appreciating my help!

so, anyways wish them luck you all <3

 

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u/kdjkinnie  · 13 hr. ago

wait, did you say he has glasses but rarely wears them? my beloved reddit user ottersayshi, your jww hyung is not in love, he might just be blind, and guessing shapes from 10 feet away.

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u/brainyeetedaway  · 12 hr. ago

am i the only one getting the ‘he looked at me, so he must be in love with someone else’ energy?

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u/popcornlover  · 10 hr. ago

bro is in denial stage, i can feel it.

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u/dumpyourbf  · 13 hr. ago

you’re literally emotionally third-wheeling yourself and you are calling it a charity.. huge respect, man.

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u/iamthedrama  · 9 hr. ago

the xmh person sounds terrific? and while you treat him like a boyfriend accessory is SENDING ME.

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u/joongdokisreal  · 3 hr. ago

OP, i seriously doubt you accidentally inserted yourself in a fanfiction where you are the love interest but you forgot (or in denial) to notice it.

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u/doremigang  · 2 hr. ago

nice, following you to get more drama and tea.

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r/collegecrush · 7 hr. ago

r/ottersayshi

Part 2— Update: wjh hyung is mad at me and I have no clue why (Read the previous post for more context and background)

alright reddit, a small update because my brain is combusting and also my hyungs are looking at me like i did something (which i totally did by making wjh hyung and jww hyung sit together), and surprisingly, xmh hyung smiled at me.

like SMILED!! xmh hyung smiled at me! chat, i might have a small tiny crush on xmh hyung because my heart kinda malfunctioned a bit.

but don’t worry!! it’s fine! i’m still committed to my mission on making my ship sail, and trust me when i say that jww hyung and wjh hyung will fall in love. but… ugh… let’s just say if xmh hyung keeps smiling at me like that, i might faint in a second, because xmh hyung is so attractive and pretty!!

anyways, the situation is like this..

  1. wjh hyung is kinda mad at me (???) like, he glared (???) at me when i asked him if he wanted the last dumpling (which xmh hyung made!), like i’d betrayed his ancestors.
  2. i almost thought jww hyung was staring at me during brunch with a soft smile, (which is confusing, because why would he stare at me like that???) but turns out, the cute lamp which wjh hyung bought was behind me, so i bet he was smiling at the lamp thinking about wjh hyung!!
  3. xmh hyung let me share his blanket during our drama binge last night!! he sighed dramatically first, like he was being forced, but he didn’t actually move the blanket away when i sat down. progress, i think??

so now i think i am torn between,

  1. wanting to continue my noble sacrifice wingman plan, and
  2. accidentally falling for the guy i’m supposed to distract with

reddit, am i the villain???

p.s. wjh hyung texted me the word “UNBELIEVABLE” at 2AM and then nothing else. i don’t know what it means. should i buy him flowers?? or…a lemon?? (he loves lemon idk how!!)

 

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u/kdjkinnie  · 7 hr. ago

my beloved reddit user ottersayshi, as i said earlier, your jww hyung need is a prescription lenses. stop shipping him with furniture.  

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u/popcornlover  · 7 hr. ago

i’m begging you. please. buy this man contact lenses. 

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u/joongdokisreal  · 6 hr. ago

small crush?? babe you’re narrating like you’re already doodling his name in your notes.

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u/dumpyourbf  · 4 hr. ago

trust me, “UNBELIEVABLE” at 2am is boyfriend rage texting. you have stepped on landmines you don’t even know exist.

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u/doremigang  · 3 hr. ago

never give up the last dumpling. that’s why he’s mad. rookie mistake.

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r/collegecrush · 2 hr. ago

r/ottersayshi

Part 3— Update: I think I made them step one step closer to each other or two steps apart.. (Read the previous posts for more context and background)

okay chat, i like to think that i have officially reached genius levels of wingmanship. hear me out!!

so there’s this super famous hotpot place near campus. everyone and their pets know it’s like… a couple spot. like if you go there, you’re basically announcing you’re dating. I KNOW I AM A GENIUS!! isn’t that PERFECT??? but something is telling me something will go wrong, but we are gonna ignore it. anygays!! let me narrate! okay, so, hear out my perfect master plan i planned!!

i invite xmh hyung (because duh, he deserves to eat well!! and he has basically been putting up with me this whole time). then, i will ALSO give jww hyung a voucher for the same place!! AND i would definitely tell him ‘hey maybe you can ask wjh hyung to go with you!’ bro i was practically handing him the golden ticket to romance!!

like, picture this chat; two tables, side by side. me and xmh hyung, laughing and bonding over mildly spicy broth (since xmh hyung can’t have spicy spicy stuff). across the room, wjh hyung and jww hyung, discovering their true feelings under the glow of spicy hotpot steam. ain’t it beautiful? ain’t it cinematic? it would be romcom level fluff. man, i should get paid for this.

BUT CHAT. HERE’S WHERE IT GETS WEIRD.

when i asked xmh hyung, he just looked at me like… kinda amused??? like, he had that tiny smile he does when he thinks i’m saying something dumb, but he doesn’t tell me i’m dumb (yeah… i do, at times say dumb stuff). then he was like, ‘sure, why not.’ which was!!! AMAZING!!! AWESOME!!! i almost fist pumped right there.

but then. but then. wjh hyung, who was sitting in the living room overheard. he dropped his expensive pen, which pretty badly clattered to the floor dramatically. i swear to god he had this weird (???) expression. he stared at me like i had just announced that i am dropping out of the college to join as a clown in a circus (which… okay fine, it’s fair to have that expression, but still!!). and wjh hyung started to mutter in chinese? cantonese? i don’t know chat!! even though i passed hsk 1 with flying colours, i am confused?? like, i couldn’t even figure out whether hyung was cursing at me or was rapping freestyle???

then jww hyung, my saviour, came out of no where, looking so good in a loose tee shirt and shorts. he patted wjh hyung’s back, like he is calming him from a heart attack (couple goals!!!).

and i’m like— ??? brother ??? it’s just a hotpot??? why are you so dramatic???

before i could proceed with my thoughts, xmh hyung just grabbed wjh hyung and went to another room. I have no clue what kinda magic happened, because wjh hyung was calm and only a bit sulky when he came out after fifteen minutes. jww hyung was just staring me with a torn expression, which kind of stinged a bit, but i think it’s because i ruined his perfect ‘calming your boyfriend down’ moment.

but the good news is that, the plan will proceed as such!!! xmh hyung promised me and said nothing is wrong, and it was just wjh hyung being on edge because of his due assignments!!!

anygays, operation hotpot is going live in a few hours!!! i will definitely update you guys; about the aesthetic, the skincare routine, hotpot secrets and the broth ingredients!!

wish jww hyung luck guys!!!

 

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u/kdjkinnie  · 2 hr. ago

my beloved reddit user ottersayshi, i honestly wish i could smack you across this screen, because you are so stupid!  

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u/kaeyalover  · 2 hr. Ago

i want to hold your hands as i yell that your xmh hyung and wjh hyung are boyrfriends.

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u/popcornlover  · 2 hr. ago

came here as soon as i saw the notification, expecting you finally released that you were the main character all along, but damn, you’re still stuck at adamantly playing the side character. okay buddy.

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u/whenwewereateen  · 2 hr. ago

OP is the delulu pro max than an average kpop stan

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u/louehyouidiot  · 2 hr. ago

stupid idiot (affectionately) reddit user ottersayshi, i really have no words.

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u/kungchipachi  · 2 hr. ago

your wjh hyung dropping his expensive pen and muttering in chinese is sending me LMAOOO. Bro is fighting his life fr

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u/wetookachonce  · 2 hr. ago

‘i should get paid for this’— sir, you should get arrested for this matchmaking crime.

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u/foolforyou  · 1 hr. ago

love how this series is getting more attention lol. OP is writing selfcest in the wrong way.

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u/bestiewhy  · 1 hr. ago

bet wjh would be glaring at you throughout the so called date

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u/sleepdeprivedzouie  · 1 hr. ago

wjh is entering into his villain arc, i just know pfft-

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u/joongdokisreal  · 1 hr. ago

OP, my speculation is that, your wjh hyung and xmh hyung are kissing each other and your jww hyung is a yearner final boss.

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u/dumpyourbf  · 1 hr. ago

chat, let’s hold your hands and resume the ritual where reddit user ottersayshi starts to realise he is reading the room completely wrong.

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u/doremigang  · 1 hr. ago

OP, you sweet summer child, you are literally third-wheeling yourself again.

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r/collegecrush · 5 hr. ago

r/ottersayshi

Part 4— Update: Hotpot date gone wrongly successful or successfully wrong… I honestly don’t know… but I have a tiny crush on one (Read the previous posts for more context and background)

i am confused. like, pretty confused. i haven’t been this confused since my highschool days. i can’t even tell whether the hotpot date was a success or not. i would definitely love to share the precious updates.

so this night was supposed to be my masterpiece, my magnum opus of matchmaking, right? but, instead it felt like i was the only one in the restaurant actually watching the romantic signals correctly. everyone else kept behaving strangely and emotionally but in ways i simply cannot decode without suffering a small brain hemorrhage. sighs.

so we arrive at the hotpot place, and immediately the universe betrays me. why? because there’s only one table available. ONE. yet again, my perfect plan to give jww hyung and wjh hyung their own romantic table gets crushed by fate. i tried to keep calm. i told myself that i can salvage this easily. i can absolutely remain calm and figure it out in such a way not to crash jww hyung’s and wjh hyung’s date!

but that’s when wjh hyung gently tugged xmh hyung toward the seat beside him.

it made me go all ?????

why would he do that???

and it hit me like a vision from a romance novel!!

he was trying to make jww hyung jealous!!

i knew it. 

the soft pout wjh hyung made when he pulled xmh hyung closer? A classic textbook jealous-provocation strategy.

chat, when i tell you i was practically glowing with pride, i really mean it!!

and then, throughout the meal, wjh hyung kept sulking... you know the type of sulking which is not dramatic? i am amazed on how xmh hyung’s whatever magic he did on wjh hyung to be this soft worked wonders!

wjh hyung did not glare nor did he sigh loud— but he had this quiet, disappointed, slightly wounded sulking that made him look like someone had hidden his favourite snack. he kept glancing in this tiny triangle: first at xmh hyung, then at jww hyung, then down at his bowl, then back at xmh hyung again. clearly he was checking: ‘is jww hyung watching? is he reacting? is my jealousy tactic working?’ 

it was, honestly, so adorable!!!

and the best part? jww hyung WAS reacting!!!! 

i am almost 99.9% sure that it worked!! jww hyung’s shoulders kept shaking. subtle tremors here and there, as if he was physically holding something back. at one moment, his hand even went up to his mouth once, like he was trying not to let anything slip. i looked at him and thought, with absolute certainty. ‘my god… he’s jealous. he’s trying so hard not to show it. poor hyung, he must be hurting.’

i felt PROUD!!!

proud of wjh hyung for pulling off such a subtle, advanced strategy!

proud of jww hyung for feeling things!

proud of myself for orchestrating this entire blooming love arc!

but then— then i showed xmh hyung the cute little fishballs floating in the broth and he leaned slightly closer to me to look at them. just slightly, which was barely anything! but then, wjh hyung’s whole posture deflated.

like, he didn’t get angry, he didn’t say anything. he just looked… disappointed???

he looked gently heartbroken, like he had placed his entire strategy into the universe and the universe turned around and handed ME the attention instead.

i almost wanted to pat his head and say, ‘don’t worry hyung, jww hyung IS jealous. he’s shaking right now. trust me.’

and meanwhile, xmh hyung kept observing everything with this quiet little spark in his eyes, like he was enjoying every single emotional shift at the table. he didn’t interfere, nor did he correct anyone. he didn’t even push wjh hyung away or question why i talked to him. he just sat there looking… entertained. he even smiled slightly when i commented on the food, and wjh hyung’s pout got deeper. which, obviously, i interpreted (again, 99.9% certain) as, ‘okay, maybe wjh hyung needs to up his game to make jww hyung react more.’

and to help the situation along, i began serving jww hyung extra pieces of meat and vegetables as a small comfort gestures because a man struggling through jealousy needs support and nutrition. i noticed wjh hyung glanced at his bowl each time i did it, and i thought the plan was going smoothly! he’s noticing jww hyung!! he’ll realise jww hyung is on edge, and he’ll push harder!!

except instead of pushing harder, he just stared at the pot with this soft defeated look, which i assumed meant he was questioning whether his tactic was too subtle.

in the end, the entire meal was full of secret glances, trembling shoulders, soft sulks, quiet smiles, and emotional subtext so thick you could scoop it with the ladle!! 

i genuinely think this dinner was a breakthrough. wjh hyung’s jealousy tactic was working wonders! jww hyung was clearly feeling something. and xmh hyung, bless him, was the perfect neutral distraction point.

mission hotpot, despite the chaos!!

a SUCCESS.

the love triangle is advancing.

i am a genius, aren’t i?

but something is telling me it went off-rail, but it’s okay!!

we got this!!

between i really think i have this tiny bit crush on xmh hyung! >_<

 

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u/kdjkinnie  · 5 hr. ago

dear reddit user ottersayshi, i have been following you since your very first update and just wanted to tell you to stop being this oblivious…

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u/denialaintweak  · 5 hr. Ago

i cannot express how much i laughed at how optimistic you are about your plan being successful. really appreciate your efforts.

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u/popcornlover  · 5 hr. ago

sigh, how many episodes left for you to realise you’re the main character?

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u/madeinthepm · 5 hr. ago

i’m going to nominate reddit user ottersayshi for the best delulu person for the oscar <3

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u/whenwewereateen  · 5 hr. ago

OP, i fear that your delulu has exceeded the pro max level.

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u/hitmanbang · 5 hr. ago

sweet sweet summer child, please start to trust when you feel something is going wrong!!

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u/louehyouidiot  · 5 hr. ago

your wjh hyung is sulking because his boyfriend, your xmh hyung is busy looking at you..

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u/raindropsstars  · 5 hr. ago

not me getting excited that you finally realised you have a crush on jww, but only to realise you are still in delulu thinking you like xmh…

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u/kungchipachi  · 5 hr. ago

bet your wjh hyung is emotionally wilting because you took his bf’s attention for two seconds LMAOO

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u/watermelonsugar  · 5 hr. ago

the fact that you saw your jww hyung shaking and immediately diagnosed it as jealousy instead of literally any other emotion is sending me—

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u/foolforyou  · 4 hr. ago

really really love how you are reading signals that do not exist in a language only you speak lol

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u/bestiewhy  · 3 hr. ago

who is with me when i say the xmh guy was absolutely letting all of this unfold for his entertainment haha

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u/sleepdeprivedzouie  · 3 hr. ago

your jww hyung was one laugh away from choking on the pot, NOT from jealousy

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u/joongdokisreal  · 2 hr. ago

i love that you interpreted your jww hyung’s wheezing as heartbreak. please never change~

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u/dumpyourbf  · 1 hr. ago

chat, again, let’s hold your hands and resume the ritual where reddit user ottersayshi starts to realise he is reading the room completely wrong. (please work this time)

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u/doremigang  · 1 hr. ago

let’s all stan xmh; king of instigating, king of enjoying wjh’s suffering, king of letting OP run wild.

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r/collegecrush · 1 hr. ago

r/ottersayshi

Part 5— Update: I SAW SOMETHING I SHOULD NOT HAVE SEEN. I AM TRAUMATISED. MY EYES ARE BURNING.

reddit.

REDDIT.

i am NOT OKAY

i am QUITE POSSIBLY DYING

i am writing this from the outside bench in front of the apartment building because i cannot step back inside without screaming my lungs out. HELL, i can not even sit up because i get knocked out by the memories i just witnessed.

i thought nothing could go wrong since we wrapped up the hotpot date smoothly. i thought today would be a normal day where me and xmh hyung would hang out and jww hyung and wjh hyung would make us dinner, letting them have a happy bubble.

but BOY I WAS WRONG.

wait no, BOY I WAS WRONGED!

AAAH I CAN’T EVEN IMAGINE.

NO NO NO NO.

tonight was definitely the day lord said, ‘let’s all fuck up chan’s day.’ BECAUSE THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED.

so, i get home, with the pair of keys in hand, happily thinking about the delicious snacks jww hyung bought me last week, humming the song jww hyung used on his edits, and opened the door—

And I FREEZE.

not the ones like, ‘oh? what’s that?’ freeze.

HELL NO.

IT WAS A BODY PARALYSIS.

because, on the couch— the couch where jww hyung sits and plays with wjh hyung, the couch jww would often carry me from there to my room, the couch where jww hyung cuddled me a few months ago. On the couch were— wjh hyung and xmh hyung,

MAKING OUT LIKE THEY ARE TRYING TO ABSORB EACH OTHER'S SPIRITS!!!

this was not PG!!

it was not even PG-13!!!

this was a harcore full 18+ emotional damage content!!!!

i’m talking about how xmh hyung was practically in wjh hyung’s lap, his hands in his hair, pulling him closer like the world was ending in 30 minutes.

and, oh lord, wjh hyung had one hand on xmh hyung’s waist and the other under his jaw, tilting his face like he was sculpting a masterpiece.

EWW EWW EWWW

their KISSING was LOUD. like LOUD enough that i heard it before my brain even processed the image. like whispered gasps, soft groans, and that disgusting little sound lips make when they part after being TOO CLOSE FOR TOO LONG!!!!

i swear one of them moaned. i think it was wjh hyung. i cannot confirm because my soul tried to EXIT MY BODY. it was indecent. it was sinful. it was messy. ewww. it looked like they had been doing this for YEARS and forgot that other people EXIST. EWWWWWW

AND THE WORST PART???

I SAW IT, WITH MY INNOCENT EYES.

i don’t know, i must’ve let out some kind of dying-crow noise because they ripped apart SO FAST, except xmh hyung still had his hand in wjh hyung’s shirt and wjh hyung still had swollen lips and they both stared at me like i was the unexpected plot twist in their romance novel????

i fucking screamed.

I FUCKING SCREAMED SO LOUD.

AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!

“HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO WONWOO HYUNG!?!?!?!?”

OH MY GOD, I SCREAMED.

my voice cracked like a middle schooler hitting puberty.

the worst worst?

wjh hyung actually WHIMPERED???

and xmh hyung just blinked at me like i was a very interesting documentary animal???

AND MY HEART. MY CHEST. MY MIND. EVERYTHING.

i felt betrayal shoot into my bloodstream like caffeine injected straight into the soul. because WHO IS THE REAL VICTIM HERE????

WONWOO HYUNG. 

MY SWEET POETIC HYUNG. 

MY FAVORITE HYUNG.

THE MAN I HAVE BEEN HELPING.

THE MAN WHO HAS BEEN SHAKING WITH EMOTION FOR DAYS.

AND THEY ARE KISSING COUCH EDITION WHILE HE IS SUFFERING????

i panicked.

i ran.

and i literally RAN out the front door and down the stairs like a victorian woman fleeing scandal!!!

and then, because my heart was pounding and my brain was on FIRE, i called jww hyung.

i called while RUNNING.

i don’t remember much of what i screamed and blabbered to jww hyung but that got jww hyung so scared. oh, i do remember screaming not to come to the house.

when i saw jww hyung turning the corner, i ran to him and hugged him so tight.

“HYUNG!!! I’M SO SORRY!!! YOU DIDN’T DESERVE THIS!!!!” 

jww hyung went all concerned that he was brushing my messed up hair away from my face and wiping the hot tears and snort (???) away from my face and asked “chan… what happened?”

i couldn’t process anything because why was jww hyung still so sweet and taking care of me when i should be the one who should take care of him??? i then, went on rambling.

“THEY BETRAYED YOU HYUNG THEY DIDN’T EVEN CLOSE THE CURTAINS WHY WOULD THEY KISS LIKE THAT ON THE COUCH OF ALL PLACES??? YOU’RE MY FAVOURITE HYUNG I WON’T LET THEM HURT YOU—”

i must have being blabbing too much that jww hyung then cupped him cheeks and calmly said, “breath, chan-ah.”

WHY IS WONWOO HYUNG SO CALM AND SWEET???

WEN JUNHUI IS SUCH A JERK!!!!!!

FUCK YOU WEN JUNHUI!!!!!

i think i hiccuped a few times and then sprinted up to him like he was the last safe person on earth. (he really is). u grabbed him by the wrist gently, i think? and dragged him AWAY from the building like a dangerous monster was inside. THERE DEFINITELY WAS A MONSTER IN THE FORM OF WEN JUNHUI!!

once we reached some-what away from the building, near a deserted convenience store, i decided to tell him. i was shaking. i was trembling. I WAS DYING!

then i told him, “they’re… they’re kissing… in the living room… YOUR CRUSH… AND MY FAKE CUDDLE HYUNG… HOW COULD THEY… HYUNG ARE YOU OKAY??? ARE YOU HEARTBROKEN??? SHOULD I GET YOU WATER??????? SHOULD I AVENGE YOU??????”

he just stared at me for a long moment, like he was a confused cat??? or a confused fox??? i don’t know man??? either way, a cat and fox, would really suit him because it’s jww hyung!!

he then opened his mouth. closed it. then opened it again. and he said, “chan-ah… I’m not… in love with jun.”

WHICH???? sorry???? what do you MEAN you’re not????

WONWOO HYUNG, I HAVE SEEN THE STARING!!!

THE SHAKING.

THE EMOTIONAL TENSION.

THE LONG GAZES.

THE YEARNING.

THE WAY YOU LOOKED AT HIM LIKE HE WAS A SAD HAIKU.

but he just got up quietly, patted my shoulder gently like I was the one emotionally collapsing, and said, “chan-ah… i think you misunderstood something.”

MISUNDERSTOOD???

HOW???

WHAT PART???

THE KISSING???

THE ROMANTIC TENSION???

THE WAY THEY LOOK LIKE THEY’RE FILMED IN SOFT LIGHTING BY GOD THEMSELF???

hyung must have been so affected that he was denying things.

i put my hand on his shoulder and said, “i’m so sorry, hyung. you don’t deserve this. you were so brave at the hotpot date last night.”

and then he made a SOUND. like a half-snort-half-cough??? 

POOR HYUNG, he was choking on grief.

admist all the chaos brewing in his mind, HE HUGGED ME!!

just a soft little squeeze, like i needed it. which made me think,“oh my god he’s comforting me because he’s too numb to process the betrayal.”

I DON’T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING ANYMORE.

I DON’T KNOW WHO LOVES WHO.

MY MISSION IS IN SHAMBLES.

i need time. i need air. i need emotional insurance.

i will update once i stop shaking.

 

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u/kdjkinnie  · 2 hr. ago

so are we going to ignore how OP exposed his name, jww hyung and wjh hyung?

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u/denialaintweak  · 2 hr. Ago

don’t say it don’t say it don’t— wen junhui is a submissive. WHO SAID THAT?

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u/popcornlover  · 2 hr. ago

my popcorn is running out, and you still haven’t realised you are the one YOUR WONWOO HYUNG LIKES!

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u/madeinthepm · 2 hr. ago

wonwoo hyung calling OP ‘chan-ah’ is like calling me single in 12849823759837345 languages… 

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u/whenwewereateen  · 2 hr. ago

i love how OP’s first reaction to seeing his crush, xmh kissing (his boyfriend, lmaoooo) wjh is “HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO WONWOO HYUNG????”

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u/hitmanbang · 2 hr. ago

what’s making the whole thing funnier is how OP is still thinking of how much jww is heartbroken when he is probably holding his laughter so hard 

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u/louehyouidiot  · 2 hr. ago

your wjh hyung whimpering when caught is the funniest part because that man was not scared that you saw them making out, instead he was scared for HIS LIFE because you screamed with the force of a hurricane.

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u/raindropsstars  · 2 hr. ago

my dear OP, can we already reach the ending where you realise your wonwoo hyung is in love with you???

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u/kungchipachi  · 2 hr. ago

bet your wjh hyung was thinking he was going to have the best moment with his boyfriend on his lap thinking they have their time, but ended up being the victim of a non-human banshee scream lol

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u/watermelonsugar  · 2 hr. ago

sweetheart… your wonwoo hyung is hugging you because HE’S FINE! you are the only one in pain right now. wjh and xmh aren’t betraying anyone, they are a couple. this entire opera is playing in your head!!

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u/foolforyou  · 2 hr. ago

really really love how you are reading signals that do not exist in a language only you speak lol

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u/bestiewhy  · 2 hr. ago

I KNOW xmh just blinked once and went, “Wow. It begins.” OP, you really gave that man a story to tell for years.

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u/sleepdeprivedzouie  · 2 hr. ago

your jww hyung’s calm reaction was not heartbreak, it was ‘oh my god, i’m in love with this otter.’

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u/joongdokisreal  · 2 hr. ago

as i said earlier, OP, please never change~

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u/dumpyourbf  · 1 hr. ago

you know what chat, let’s give up on the ritual and start saving funds for OP’s therapy sessions when he realises he was orchestrating everything inside his head lol <3

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u/doremigang  · 1 hr. ago

love how OP’s style of updating changed, you can definitely tell that he is broken lol

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───────────────────────────────────────────



r/collegecrush · 1 hr. ago

r/ottersayshi

Part 6— Update: I HAVE BEEN LIVING A LIE. EVERYTHING I THOUGHT I KNEW WAS WRONG. AND ALSO WONWOO HYUNG JUST KISSED ME???

reddit.

REDDIT.

i don’t know who i am anymore.

i don’t know what my purpose is.

i don’t know how i managed to survive this long with a brain that apparently DOESN’T WORK???

i am updating this while wonwoo hyung is standing in the queue to get me food from the nearby stall.

so, after hyung hugged me (which i thought he was so close to sobbing), i thought the evening would pass by me comforting my favorite hyun, buying him hot chocolate, wrapping my scarf around his neck, making sure he is receiving all the emotional support.

and he sat there, near me, slowly taking his hands into his, which is valid because he went through a heartbreak and needs reassurance right?

after what felt like an eternity, he said, “chan-ah, we need to talk.”

which, by the way, NO ONE should ever say to me because my heart immediately started BEATING LIKE A DRUM SOLO. i was ready for him to break down crying or swear a vengeance pact or something equally dramatic. 

but no??????

instead, he just sighed and said, “jun and minghao are dating.”

????

WHO AND WHO?

????

i blinked a few times. each time i blinked, i felt my brain cells depreciate. then something sparked.

poor hyung, he is even going this far into delusion.

“oh, like now? like after the kiss? hyung, you—”

“no chan-ah.” wonwoo hyung just stared at me like people usually stare at the slow-loading webpage. “they have been dating for eight years now.”

i am pretty sure my soul left my body, took a walk, enjoyed the freedom, and only came back to my body out of pity.

“EIGHT???? YEARS????”

i screamed so loudly that the couple of pigeons which were eating whatever leftover the elder couples scattered before going away flinched and yeeted away.

hyung nodded, sipping his hot chocolate (where did this come from???) like he hadn’t just shattered the glass cage i was living in.

“yeah, they have been dating since their high school, apparently—”

and, in all honesty, i didn’t hear anything after ‘eight years.’

why?

because my ears were ringing. because my vision was blurry. because my universe was collapsing.

when my soul came back into my body (again), i grabbed his arm like a man clinging to the last floating door in titanic.

“HYUNG, HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?? THEY NEVER SAID ANYTHING!! THEY NEVER ACTED LIKE IT!!”

to which, hyung just glanced at me, with a stupid soft smile and said, “chan-ah… they literally hold hands on the couch when they think no one’s looking.”

and this is how the rest of the conversation went on—

“that’s JUST BEST FRIENDS—”

“jun made minghao breakfast in bed on his birthday.”

“that’s JUST… nice—”

“they share a spotify and duolingo premium duo account.”

“…okay that one is suspicious BUT STILL—”

“minghao calls jun ‘baby’.”

“jun hyung ain’t special, minghah hyung called ME ‘cute boy’ once!!!!!!”

“that’s different. minghao calls him husband—”

“HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT’S DIFFERENT AND WHAT’S NOT I’M 21 AND CONFUSED ALL THE TIME—”

like was i lying? NO!!! I DESERVE TO BE CONFUSED!!!

wonwoo hyung then put his hand on my knees and squeezed me gently. i swear to god i had no clue why my heart started doing summersault, probably because it was overwhelmed by all the new information i was fed. anygays, he then casually dropped next information.

“i’m not in love with jun.”

what? what? what? WHAT?

“BUT— THE STARING!!!” i protested, flailing like a fish.

“the lingering gazes!! the slow blinking!! the emotional shaking!! The KOREAN DRAMA ENERGY—”

“chan-ah. i stare because i cannot see without my glasses.”

i swear time stopped. all the longing gazes, all the intense eye contact, all the emotionally trembling moments i built entire theories around—

HE WAS JUST BLIND.

WHAT!!!!!!

oh my god.

oh my god???

and then, he dropped yet another bomb as he laughed softly.

“plus, i already like someone else. actually… i’ve liked them for a while.”

my heart dropped into my stomach.

“REALLY??? WHO??? DO I KNOW THEM?? WHAT IF THEY NEVER NOTICED?? SHOULD WE MAKE A PLAN?? SHOULD I HELP YOU CONFESS—”

Then, as if it was a k-drama moment, he reached out. he tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear.

and i froze.

“chan-ah” he said quietly. “it’s you.”

i stared.

he stared.

a leaf blew by.

a pigeon made eye contact with me.

my brain said: does not compute.

i choked out the most intelligent response possible; “…me???”

“yes. you.”

“but— but i’m DUMB—”

“i know.”

“i’m CLUELESS—”

“i’m aware.”

“I RUINED YOUR ENTIRE LOVE LIFE ARC—”

“you absolutely did.”

“AND YOU STILL LIKE ME—?”

and then wonwoo hyung smiled?? what is wrong with him???

this soft, warm smile that hit me straight in the heart.

“yes, chan-ah.”

and before my brain could reboot, before i could even gasp, he leaned forward and KISSED ME.

  1. THE. MOUTH.
  2. MY MOUTH.

WHAT!!!!

i am pretty sure i made an embarrassing little squeak noise to which he laughed against my lips.

and then my stomach decided it was the right time to protect against me.

oh my god.

then he just kissed my cheeks and went to get food for me.

i think i died.

i think i am typing this from the afterlife.

i don’t know what this means.

i don’t know how to feel.

i think i'm happy?

i think i'm shocked?

i think my brain is soup?????

i will… update when i can function again.

 

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u/kdjkinnie  · 1 hr. ago

wonwoo hyung broke chan so much that he ain’t even trying to cover their names lol

but, CONGRATULATIONS!!

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u/denialaintweak  · 1 hr. Ago

so jun and minghao are highschool sweethearts?

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u/popcornlover  · 1 hr. ago

the fact that wonwoo had to sit you down and explain that the ‘longing stares’ were literally just bad eyesight is sending me into orbit. oh my dear OP, babe, you created an entire love triangle fanfic out of photophobia.

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u/madeinthepm · 1 hr. ago

love how OP is treating reddit as a personal diary LMAO 

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u/whenwewereateen  · 1 hr. ago

please invite us to the wedding!!!

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u/hitmanbang · 1 hr. ago

“he called me cute boy once” “jun hyung ain’t special” THESE ARE SENDING ME—

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u/louehyouidiot  · 1 hr. ago

dear reddit user ottersayshi, for the past 5 updates, we have been screaming about how your wonwoo hyung is just blind and is in love with you…

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u/raindropsstars  · 1 hr. ago

FINALLY!!!! FINALLY!!!!

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u/kungchipachi  · 1 hr. ago

eight years and going strong!!! yaaay cheers to them!!!

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u/watermelonsugar  · 1 hr. ago

wonwoo gently tucking your hair behind your ear before confessing???? 

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u/foolforyou  · 1 hr. ago

the way how you tried to refute in denial while wonwoo smiling and calmly answering is enough for me to know you guys would last longer than my parents marriage!

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u/bestiewhy  · 1 hr. ago

now i’m curious on how everything else would result in lol

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u/sleepdeprivedzouie  · 1 hr. ago

your matchmaking arc ended with you being the love interest. truly iconic behaviour!

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u/joongdokisreal  · 1 hr. ago

BRO FOUND OUT HIS OTP WAS JUST BAD EYESIGHT.

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u/dumpyourbf  · 1 hr. ago

YES!!! the therapy cost we collected is less than the estimated fund!! Please check your emails as i would be sending you all the receipts and calculation of OP’s therapy session split!

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u/doremigang  · 1 hr. ago

thank you king for updating! Now camping to know more about minghao and jun lol

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───────────────────────────────────────────



r/collegecrush · 10 hr. ago

r/meowmeowjun

clarification post because my household is feral + i am loyal to ONE man (it’s minghao). stop shipping me with wonwoo. especially chan. 

hello reddit.

jun here. yes that jun. wjh from ottersayhi’s posts. the one accused of starring in an entire romance drama i wasn't aware of. the one dragged into a love triangle powered by chan’s brain cell (singular). the one kissed by exactly ONE MAN for eight years: xmh, xu minghao.

i have come to clear the air before chan accidentally writes fanfiction about me again.

  1. i am dating the absolute love of my life. xu minghao.

since high school. eight years. EIGHT. YEARS. i don’t know how chan missed this, he moved in two years ago. we hold hands on the couch. minghao steals my plushies. we literally have matching slippers. so, what’s about this screams‘single and yearning for wonwoo’? nothing. absolutely nothing.

  1. wonwoo is my best friend.

he is legally blind without glasses and emotionally blind at all times. he is not my boyfriend. honestly, eww. he never was. he never will be. he cries at dad jokes videos and judges my cooking. this is not romance. this is brotherhood.

  1. chan came home today looking like a tomato competing in a crying contest.

you guys wanna know about how channie came home? face red. hair messy. breathing like he just outran the police. he stumbled in behind wonwoo, grabbed my sleeve, and whispered,“jun-hyung… i am so sorry for accusing you of betraying wonwoo hyung…” which is hilarious, because the only person i have EVER betrayed is the lemon in my fridge by forgetting it existed.

  1. minghao, the love of my life, watched the entire apology like it was live entertainment.

my beloved wife, my beloved lifeline, my beloved queen, my beloved king, the reason for my existence, my soulmate, my salvation, xu minghao. he sat on the armrest. sipping tea (i brewed for him) staring silently (honestly i wanted to drop down on my knees and do whatever he order around). i swear he didn’t even blink (his beautiful eyes that hold the stars and galaxies were so pretty). at one point he smiled at me (i’m ascending to heaven, along with the celestial beauty in the form of the love of my life). i almost passed out. do you know what it’s like to be loved by someone who can end you with one raised eyebrow? it’s wonderful and terrifying. i’m so in love with him. i want to marry him, i want to spend the rest of my life with him, doing the things he wants me to do.

  1. chan said he thought he ‘saved wonwoo from heartbreak.’

heartbreak from what exactly? wonwoo wasn't in love with me. i wasn't in love with him. the only heartbreak present was the moment minghao’s bubble tea ran out of pearls this morning, which i shall solve by making him a new set of pearls at home. anything for him.

  1. yes, i am a simp.

i will own it. i am not afraid to admit how down i am for the one who allowed me to walk beside him. My absolute love of my life.

  1. minghao calls me “baby.”
  2. minghao steals my food and then complains it isn’t seasoned enough.
  3. minghao wears my hoodie and then gaslights me into thinking it was his.
  4. minghao bites my shoulder when i say something stupid.
  5. i am in love with him. 

these are boyfriend privileges and i cherish every bite mark.

  1. to everyone who is questioning and asking for proof we’re dating.

it’s okay, not everyone would get a partner like minghao. nope, you guys will never get one :) me and my wife are perfectly happy on our eight years of relationship and will be on our way to reach hundred years, while you will be having your life terribly single. :)

but if anyone wants, i can post a blurry pic or 144p photo of my wife cuddling my plushies and being so so so so cute. just comment junhao.

  1. me dropping his pen? not jealousy.

that was pure “why is my boyfriend’s cuddle-buddy taking my boyfriend to hotpot without ME.” minghao is NOT his boyfriend. chan was basically kidnapping him. i’d drop my pen, i’d drop my knees, begging minghao to take me too. 

  1. final PSA: STOP SHIPPING ME WITH WONWOO.

unless you want minghao to show up at your house in silence. and stare. for twenty minutes. i’m warning you. you guys don’t want to mess with my beautiful wife. 

okay that’s all.

chan, if you’re reading this, please stop matchmaking.

wonwoo, please wear your glasses.

minghao, stop reading this over my shoulder.

no, you cannot delete it.

no, babe, give the phone back—

stop—

EDIT: minghao took my phone. Help.

 

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u/pastelhaos  · 10 hr. ago

jun types like he’s the protagonist. he is not.

also: stop calling yourself a simp publicly. it’s embarrassing.

— xmh

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u/kdjkinnie  · 10 hr. ago

oh myg od?? we got jun here???

EDIT:  and minghao???

…..JUNHAO!!!!!

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u/denialaintweak  · 10 hr. Ago

…why does this post felt like jun’s dairy praising his wife?
junhao!!!!!!!

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u/popcornlover  · 10 hr. ago

chan causing a three-person emotional collapse while thinking he’s helping is peak cinema lol
junhao!!!!

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u/madeinthepm · 9 hr. ago

“the only person i ever betrayed is the lemon in my fridge” LMAOOO 

junhao cult, rise!!!

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u/whenwewereateen  · 9 hr. ago

the way minghao silently confiscated the phone mid-post is EXACTLY the energy i expected

junhao domestic intimacy kings <3

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u/hitmanbang · 8 hr. ago

junaho junhao junhao! ugh the slippers reveal??? eight-year domestic legends.

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u/louehyouidiot  · 7 hr. ago

JUNAHO! SMINGHAO REPLYING???? ICONIC. also jun, share your photostoo  please or we riot.

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u/raindropsstars  · 7 hr. ago

JUNHAO PHOTO REVEAL!!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

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u/kungchipachi  · 6 hr. ago

jun, are you interested in buying the “best husband and the biggest simp of xu minghao” shirt? i can print it for you and deliver them!! JUNHAO! 

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u/watermelonsugar  · 6 hr. ago

why does it sound so soft and cute when jun mentioned chan was hiding behind wonwoo? aww

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u/foolforyou  · 5 hr. ago

i just know jun is so close to write sonnets about minghao lol

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u/bestiewhy  · 4 hr. ago

now i’m curious on how everything else would result in lol

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u/sleepdeprivedzouie  · 4 hr. ago

my life is suddenly so good??? thanks king <3

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u/joongdokisreal  · 3 hr. ago

breath in. breath out. SCREAMS JUNHAOOOOOOOOOOOO

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u/dumpyourbf  · 2 hr. ago

minghao is the dom and jun is a sub— WHO SAID THAT????

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u/doremigang  · 1 hr. ago

JUNHAO!! WE GOT JUNHAO!!!

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───────────────────────────────────────────

 

“.....okay, wow.”

“....what now?”

“nothing… just… your phone seems very interesting. more interesting than me, apparently.”

“...jun, i’m messaging my professor.”

“no, no. it’s fine. yeah, it’s completely fine. talk to him. ignore your boyfriend sitting right here.”

“jun.”

“don’t ‘jun’ me. i’m emotionally wounded.”

“you’re emotionally dramatic.”

“hold me. :(“



𓍯𓂃𓏧♡



“hyung. hyung. hyungie. oh my god.”

“yes channie?”

“oh my god… you’re my boyfriend.”

“yes, chan-ah. that is generally what kissing implies.”

“no but— boyfriend. like… you. mine. mine??? i have a BOYFRIEND???

“…should i write it on a sticky note for you?”

“no because if you do i’ll cry.”

“…chan-ah, you’re already crying.”



𓍯𓂃𓏧♡



“xiaohao, can you hand me the pan?”

“...here, don’t burn yourself again.”

“i didn’t burn myself last time.”

“jun, you yelped so loud the neighbors texted to check on us.”

“i yelped because you kissed my cheek.”

“…same thing.”

“baobei, you can’t just call melting me ‘same thing.’

“watch me.”



𓍯𓂃𓏧♡



“wonwoo hyung, can you pass me the remote? my boyfriend arms are tired.”

“your what arms, chan-ah?

“my boyfriend arms. the arms of someone with a boyfriend, which is me!”

“…you’ve said ‘boyfriend’ nine times in two minutes.”

and i can say it ten. BOYFRI—”

“minghao, did you hear that? wonwoo has a boyfriend and i’m still jealous because your hand brushed mine for half a second.

“jun. stir the soup.”

“i’ll stir the SOUP of my LOVE—”

“jun.”

“okay stirring sorry.



𓍯𓂃𓏧♡



“jun, stand still.”

“are you gonna kiss me?”

“…i’m buttoning your shirt.”

“that’s like kissing but with fabric.”

“no, it’s not.”

“you’re touching my collar. i might faint.”

“then sit down before you collapse like a victorian child.”

“i’m already collapsing in my heart.”

“…that’s your problem.”



𓍯𓂃𓏧♡



“wonwoo hyung?”

“yes, chan-ah.”

“do boyfriends hug here too? like this hallway specifically??”

“…yes. come here.”

“.....hyungie, you’re too sweet i’ll die.”

“please don’t. we just started dating.”



𓍯𓂃𓏧♡




Notes:

...and done!!

thank you so mcuh for sticking around!! really love you guys for reading my fics!! it really makes me so happy aahh!! okay bye!! im so sleepy aah